Don’t Pick Up Boyfriends From the Trash Bin

translator: baumkuchen  editors: serefina, glitterypanda

Chi Xiaochi was rather amused by his opening statement. 

If I do mind calling you uncle, can we discuss calling you bro instead?

Dong Feihong drove an old, silver-grey Buick.

After they got onto the car, he asked Chi Xiaochi, “Have you eaten yet?”

Chi Xiaochi said, “I’ve eaten a little.”

Dong Feihong glanced into the rearview mirror. The corners of his lips curved slightly. “Right now, you’re still growing and you have a lot of training to do. What do you want to eat? Uncle will take you out to eat, and it can also count as us officially getting to know each other.”

Chi Xiaochi confirmed with 061, “Dong Ge really has such a relative?”

061 said, “Even if he does, it doesn’t matter much anyways. Him not appearing in Dong Ge’s memories proves that this person doesn’t make much of an impact on Dong Ge’s fate.” 

As he spoke, 061’s voice naturally turned softer, “If you can’t trust him, just keep your distance. Just take him as another friend who can accompany you for meals. Isn’t having another place to stay a good thing?”

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Chi Xiaochi breathed in with a hiss and rubbed his ears.

He really couldn’t take 061 speaking like this. Even a normal sentence would turn warm and alluring when it came out of his mouth. 

Hearing his quiet breath, Dong Feihong turned and asked him, “What’s wrong?”

Chi Xiaochi said, “I’m a little carsick.”

Dong Feihong steered his car closer to the curb and slowed to a stop. “Think about what you want to eat.”

Chi Xiaochi imitated Dong Ge’s coldness and pridefulness to perfection. “Anything’s fine.” 

Dong Feihong said, “Then we’ll just go with my choice.”

He restarted the car. “Do you like eating fish? There’s a restaurant known for its stewed fish nearby. I hear it’s pretty good.” 

Chi Xiaochi raised a brow. “……Mm, okay.”

Dong Ge didn’t have any dislikes, anything was fine with him.

But stewed fish used to be Lou Ying’s favourite dish.

His father came from the three northeast provinces and had the deepest feelings of this dish. After his parents died, Lou Ying recorded down the recipe for this dish as a kind of invaluable inheritance and made it for Chi Xiaochi to eat.

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Afterwards, this dish became one of Chi Xiaochi’s favourite dishes.

Seeing Chi Xiaochi lost in thought, 061 asked, “What’s wrong?”

Chi Xiaochi said, “This world is a little strange.” 

The mission target’s surname was Lou, and his surface personality was somewhat similar to Lou-ge’s. Even the original’s host’s memories of the original timeline overlapped a little with Chi Xiaochi and Lou Ying’s past.

Lou-ge had been dead for 12 years, Dong Ge and Lou Sifan had had 12 years of fate together.

Even the original host’s competitive and closed-off nature had a shadow of Chi Xiaochi from a certain period in the past.

……And now there was yet another addition, in this stewed fish. 

061 said, “It is a little strange. I’ll help you keep an eye on this, so you don’t need to worry, just focus on your mission.”

“I’m not worried,” Chi Xiaochi said, “What they say is right, in the unfathomable darkness, there’s a shrivelled calf. If it’s not fate, it’s man’s will.”

061, “…….” Is that what they say. 

“You can’t escape fate, but man’s will is also hard to avoid.” Chi Xiaochi propped up his head with a hand against his cheek, looking out at the night view and the multicoloured lights of the vibrant city streets. “Since it’s unavoidable no matter what, then just let the storm rage harder.”

Regardless of whether everything that had happened in this world was coincidental or inevitable, Chi Xiaochi at last knew that this wasn’t aimed at Dong Ge.

As long as he continued to hold his umbrella up for Dong Ge, then he wouldn’t be letting him down.

061 pursed his lips in a smile. 

He really liked the enthusiastic way Chi Xiaochi spoke, as if nothing could ever faze him or make him care, but his heart was still warmer than most people.

Chi Xiaochi really enjoyed this meal.

Dong Feihong seemed to be able to deal with Dong Ge’s introversion and reticence very well, not trying to maintain an awkward conversation, just choosing to say only the things which were important. 

“Go wash your hands?”

“Can you handle spice?”

“I’ll order you a drink, is corn juice okay, or maybe hawthorn juice?”

He would consult with Dong Ge before making decisions, not at all treating him like a child. The way he conducted himself in public really made one feel comfortable. 

After their meal, Dong Feihong glanced at his watch. He said, “It’s already so late, come back to my house and stay the night.”

Chi Xiaochi declined, “I need to head back to the team.”

Dong Feihong smiled. His slightly tilted phoenix eyes were filled with tenderness. “I already contacted your coach. You should come and stay at home for the night, get to know the place. It’ll make it more convenient for you to come by next time. I’ll send you back to your team tomorrow morning. Don’t worry, it won’t delay your training.”

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He had already spoken to this point, and Chi Xiaochi couldn’t find any reason to disagree, so he nodded. 

Like a gentleman, Dong Feihong held open the door to the backseat for him. As he reminded him to fasten his seatbelt, he didn’t forget to pop open a White Rabbit candy and stuff it into his mouth. 

As Chi Xiaochi savoured the taste of milk candy filling his mouth, he asked 061, “Why did this person never appear back when Dong Ge was still alive?”

So far, the appearance of Dong Feihong had left Chi Xiaochi on edge. 

“It’s probably the butterfly effect. ……Anyways, isn’t this good?” 061 said, “If it’s as you said, and Dong Ge is still staying in this body, now he has this uncle. He might be able to provide some of the warmth of familial love Dong Ge never received, and let him know what a family should be like.”

Chi Xiaochi said profoundly, “Liu-laoshi, you can know a person and know their face, but still not know their heart.”

061 laughed and said, “You would have to worry about not being able to guess at the hearts of others?”

Chi Xiaochi thought it over carefully for a moment, then said shamelessly, “Beloved official’s words are reasonable.” 

061, who had been going to say something, paused.

Soon, he said, “Emperor, from the looks of it, I need to make a visit to the ‘Space Between Moments’.”

The Lord God was looking for him?

Chi Xiaochi said, “Permission denied.” 

061, “Emperor, don’t fuss.”

“You’d be so alright with just leaving me with him?” Chi Xiaochi spoke boldly and confidently, with justice on his side, “What if this Dong Feihong is a shotacon? What would I do?”

061 fell strangely silent for a moment. “…….Mm…… Like last time, when I was summoned to the Lord God’s space when you were still conscious, the Lord God will have another system come and temporarily replace me.”

Chi Xiaochi, “Will it still be 009?” 

061, “Is there something wrong with 009?”

Chi Xiaochi said, “The main thing is that this time it won’t be very convenient for me to cook something for him.” The other thing was, by the looks of him, 009 was a weak chicken without any fighting power. If anything unexpected truly did happen, he wouldn’t be able to do anything. Unless he could eat Dong Feihong.

061 laughed, “Then let’s just leave it up to random selection.”

Chi Xiaochi asked him, “How long will you be gone?” 

061 said, “I can’t say for sure. If it’s quick, it’ll probably be about ten minutes. If it’s going to take some time, you should just go to sleep, no need to wait for me.”

Chi Xiaochi spoke with deep emotion, “Dalang, come back soon. I’ve prepared some medicine for you to drink when you come back.” 

061, “……” Changing settings so quickly huh. 

061 left. In the next moment, a new clear and bright voice sounded by Chi Xiaochi’s ear, “Hello, hello, can you hear me speaking?”

Chi Xiaochi immediately confirmed that this time, it wasn’t 009.

The person greeted Chi Xiaochi in a familiar manner, “Hai. I’m 089. You’re Chi Xiaochi, huh. A young man with good-looking, delicate features, one look tells me that you have a bright future ahead of you.”

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Chi Xiaochi said, “Thank you for the compliment. But I don’t actually look like this.” 

089 was stunned for two seconds. “I forgot, I forgot. Sorry, I’m an idiot hahahaha.”

Chi Xiaochi thought, this precise self-positioning was comparable to that of an intercontinental ballistic missile.

089 seemed very lively. He glanced out the window, then asked, “Where are we going ah?”

Chi Xiaochi said, “Going home.” 

089, “Going to which home?”

At that moment, Dong Feihong, who was driving, turned around again. “Are you still carsick?”

When 089 saw Dong Feihong’s whole face, he actually stopped his questioning mouth and fell into a minute long daze.

A minute later, he said expressively, “Fuck his father.”  

Two seconds later, 089 spoke again to himself, “No, wouldn’t that just be fucking myself?”

Chi Xiaochi, combining and comparing his experience of the two times someone had helped take 061’s shift, thought, having to look after this group of systems must really take a toll on one’s heart.