Ferocious Dog of Old

The school exploded, and so did Tao Xiaodong.

He never expected Chi Cheng to do this. These marks were intentional, he didn’t even have to think about it; even if Chi Cheng had had his eyes shut while answering, he wouldn’t have received such marks.

The day they checked their grades, Tao Xiaodong was at the shop working. He didn’t even know the grades were out.

When their class teacher called, Tao Xiaodong picked it up with his earphones in. The teacher asked if Chi Cheng was with him.

There was clearly something wrong with her tone. Tao Xiaodong asked, “What’s wrong, Ms Lei?”

The teacher asked him, “You didn’t know that the results came out, did you?”

“I really didn’t.” Tao Xiaodong signalled to the client and put down his things as he rose to take the call.

–

The school suspected an error in the marking. No matter what, Chi Cheng couldn’t possibly fail Chinese language. These marks were ridiculous; forget Chi Cheng, even the students at the bottom of the rankings wouldn’t be able to get such marks.

A buzz went through Tao Xiaodong’s brain. He didn’t suspect an error in the slightest. He seemed to understand what was going on in a blink of an eye.

Before this, he didn’t think of it, but with the end results before his eyes, it looked just like something Chi Cheng would be capable of.

That day, Tao Xiaodong didn’t even finish his work. He flaked on his client, saying he would do it another day, then drove straight home.

–

When he reached home, Tao Huainan was very surprised. He was just waiting for Chi Cheng to check his marks, and was already prepared to bask in Chi Cheng’s glory. Ge coming back at this time was quite unusual; he’d said this morning that he would be back late.

“Why are you back?” Tao Huainan asked his brother, astounded.

Tao Xiaodong didn’t answer him. He threw the keys at the side cabinet; they landed with quite a loud thud.

Tao Huainan couldn’t see, but he was very sensitive in all other ways. He could feel that ge’s mood wasn’t right. Tao Huainan put on his slippers and walked out. He touched his brother’s arm and asked, “What’s wrong?”

Tao Xiaodong asked Chi Cheng, “You haven’t checked your marks?”

Chi Cheng said, “Not yet.”

“Check them.” Tao Xiaodong pointed at the computer. “Check them now.”

Ge’s voice was too stern. He was angry. Tao Huainan didn’t dare to make a noise. He heard Chi Cheng go to switch the computer on. He had just been pushing Chi Cheng to check his marks, but Chi Cheng hadn’t checked them this whole time.

Tao Xiaodong stood behind Chi Cheng waiting for him to check the marks. Tao Huainan followed, slowly shifting to sit by Chi Cheng.

At this point, peak traffic had passed; the website didn’t lag at all. After keying in the examination ID, the marks popped up straight away. The loud and clear “527” on the screen burned the eyes.

Tao Xiaodong stared at that line of digits and asked Chi Cheng, “How much?”

Chi Cheng didn’t make a sound.

Tao Huainan turned his head in Chi Cheng’s direction. An unpleasant premonition hit him.

“I asked you, can’t you hear me?” Tao Xiaodong asked again.

So Chi Cheng opened his mouth and read it out: “527.”

When this number was read out, Tao Huainan’s shoulders stiffened visibly next to him.

“Quite high.” Tao Xiaodong nodded and asked him, “How did you get such high marks?”

Chi Cheng didn’t open his mouth again. Right now, Tao Xiaodong was like any ordinary parent, so angry he was quickly losing his senses.

–

Tao Huainan’s first reaction was that Chi Cheng had messed up his exam; he was even worried that ge would scold him.

Only after two seconds did he gradually come to realise it: Chi Cheng couldn’t possibly have gotten such results. No matter how badly he did, he had never received such low marks before, and everyone said that this year’s questions were very simple—his marks should’ve been high.

“68 for Chinese language. How did you get that?” Tao Xiaodong was still suppressing his fury, controlling his words.

Chi Cheng stayed silent; after this, whatever Tao Xiaodong asked, he wouldn’t speak anymore. He wasn’t staying silent because he wanted to be shirty with Tao Xiaodong. It was because, with the truth already evident before them, anything he said would only make ge even angrier.

He stood quietly before Tao Xiaodong, his head bowed. Tao Xiaodong asked several questions, to no response. He felt his temples throbbing.

“Speak. I asked you how you got these marks.” Tao Xiaodong raised his hand and grabbed Chi Cheng’s shoulder. “How you answered the exam questions.”

Chi Cheng took a step back from the confrontation, saying in a low voice, “I didn’t write the essay.”

The moment his words landed, Tao Huainan gasped sharply behind him.

Tao Xiaodong nodded. He didn’t say anything for a while. After looking at Chi Cheng, and then at Tao Huainan, he turned and left. The sweat on his back soaked his clothes, one part sticking to the skin uncomfortably; Tao Xiaodong walked as he raised his hands and tore the shirt off, slinging it at the sofa. He said, “You might as well drop the fuck out.”

–

Ge went back to his own room to lie down. Tao Huainan didn’t speak again for the rest of the afternoon.

Chi Cheng picked up the garment ge had taken off and thrown on the sofa; he washed it. After that, he sat on the sofa quietly. When dinnertime came, he went to the kitchen to make dinner.

After laying the meal out on the table, he first went to call on Tao Xiaodong. “Ge, dinner time.”

Tao Xiaodong looked at his phone, ignoring him.

Chi Cheng then went to call Tao Huainan. “Come out for dinner.”

Tao Huainan didn’t react at first. After a moment, he blinked, then replied in a somewhat unsteady voice, “Okay… coming.”

Chi Cheng didn’t eat, and neither did Tao Xiaodong. Tao Huainan sat by himself at the dining table, feeling about and eating his dinner. What exactly he ate, he had no idea. All he did was scoop mechanically into his mouth.

–

It was the first time there had ever been such a tense atmosphere in their home, as far as Tao Huainan could remember.

Before this, when Chi Cheng had gone home and baited his father into hitting him, then picked a fight in school and threw a chair, ge had been mad at him too. Back then, ge didn’t speak to him either. But that time wasn’t as bad as it was now.

Tao Xiaodong ignored Chi Cheng completely. He even left Tao Huainan alone somewhat. That night, he left without eating. After that, for a number of days, he didn’t even come home.

When Tao Huainan called him, he said he was busy and wouldn’t be back.

With ge angry, Tao Huainan was very uncomfortable, and Chi Cheng’s affair made him feel even worse.

–

After the marks came out in the class group chat, nobody spoke. At first, a few people who didn’t know what was going on said a word or two, but after they heard about what had happened, nobody continued the conversation.

The teacher called Chi Cheng and Tao Huainan. They both kept their phones switched off.

Tao Huainan didn’t know what to say if anyone asked. He was afraid of hearing people sigh, afraid that they would say Chi Cheng was immature, that they would say Chi Cheng didn’t have a brain.

For the past few days, he didn’t even go and ask Chi Cheng why he did it. Perhaps some things didn’t need to be asked. Tao Huainan had no grounds to say that Chi Cheng did the wrong thing; he didn’t even dare to ask a single question.

Tao Huainan felt more guilty about it than if he’d done something wrong himself. Chi Cheng did it all for him.

“Why are you so listless?” Chi Cheng reached out and felt Tao Huainan’s forehead. “Sick again?”

Tao Huainan shook his head and said, “No.”

Tao Huainan had been this way for days, limp as an aubergine hit by the frost.

“Stop shrinking back like that,” Chi Cheng said to him .”Help me think of a way to talk ge around.”

Tao Huainan shook his head and said, “You won’t be able to.”

“Then what do I do?” asked Chi Cheng. “Just let him stay mad?”

Tao Huainan’s mind had been a mess for the past couple of days. He couldn’t say much, and he couldn’t help Chi Cheng come up with any ideas. He was somewhat at a loss for what to do, and he wasn’t sure how to feel either. Quite honestly, Chi Cheng staying by his side in this way didn’t feel like something to be happy about; but if he were to say that Chi Cheng did the wrong thing, he would be a hypocrite.

–

The one who cared the least about the whole affair was Chi Cheng himself. From the bottom of his heart, he didn’t feel like this really mattered. When Tao Huainan propped his arms up as he sat before the table spacing out, Chi Cheng flicked his head and said, “Stop being so melancholy.”

Tao Huainan’s gaze was fixed before him. After a moment, he said, “Ge still isn’t back. You made ge so mad he ran away from home.”

“Help me make things up with him,” Chi Cheng said.

“He won’t even listen to me. How am I meant to help?” Tao Huainan maintained his posture and spoke slowly. “I don’t even dare to imagine how angry ge must be.”

Tao Xiaodong was the least intimidating parental figure around. He always did spoil the children, hanging around his little brothers like he was one of them, playing around. But this time, Chi Cheng really crossed the line.

This year, the highest score for their city was 595 marks. Of course, even if he had answered 70 marks’ worth of questions, Chi Cheng might not have received full marks; it wasn’t a hundred percent certain that he could have pulled that 2-point lead ahead, so he wouldn’t necessarily have been the top scorer.

But what if. Who could say whether he could have been ahead by two points. Chi Cheng had always received full marks for his maths papers, and it wasn’t like he’d never written a full-mark essay before.

–

Tao Xiaodong couldn’t stay away from home forever. Da Huang tried to talk him out of it in the shop, telling him not to be mad at little children.

“What do you mean ‘little’, he’s not a ‘little’ child.” Tao Xiaodong pinched between his brows, lifting his head as he leaned back against the sofa. “His head is full of ideas.”

“Isn’t this good too, though?” Huang-ge drank his tea, saying slowly, “Doesn’t this make things convenient for us?”

“I don’t need this sort of convenience.” Just thinking about it made Tao Xiaodong’s head hurt. “What a mess. He has the nerve to decide everything for himself.”

“I’m going to say something, ‘Dong, but don’t get mad.” Da Huang leaned forward slightly, lowering his voice. “You picked up this child and fed him and clothed him and raised him to this age. The household register’s been modified, the child is grown. Let’s not talk about how much effort and money it costs to raise a child, or how you just wanted to be at peace with your conscience, with no hope of repayment. It’s only right for the child to want to pay you back. It shows that he has a heart, that you raised him to grow close to you. Otherwise, if he only did things for his own sake, wouldn’t you feel upset?”

Tao Xiaodong said, “I understand what you mean, ge.”

He sat up straight and looked at Da Huang, telling him, “It’s true that when I first brought him home, I wanted to give Xiao Nan a companion, to make things easy for me. All these years, I’ve gotten it as easy as I should’ve, and I really don’t need him to live his whole life just for this purpose. If he’s tied back by this one favour I did him, isn’t it as if I bought the child?”

“Ah, you think too much.” Da Huang waved, then admonished, “The child was willing to do it himself. He cares too much, he can’t let Xiao Nan go. You’re his brother and you’re making a big deal out of it, getting angry at him. If it were me, I’d say well done, good boy.”

–

The good boy Chi Cheng was a little frustrated at home, not knowing how to break the deadlock. When Tao Huainan did anything wrong, he could say nice things, admit his wrongs, act cute. Those were things that Chi Cheng couldn’t say even if you beat him within an inch of his life. He didn’t know how to admit he was wrong, or say soft words.

Tao Huainan woke from his afternoon nap. He felt his way out of his room.

When he woke up and couldn’t feel Chi Cheng, he put on his shoes and came out looking for him. His heart was still in knots; he didn’t want to speak much these days, so even when he couldn’t find him, he wouldn’t speak and ask, instead feeling along a few places bit by bit. When he reached the sofa, he bent down and slowly dragged his hand over. When he didn’t feel anything at first, he frowned slightly, until at last he touched Chi Cheng’s arm at the edge.

He didn’t speak after touching him either. His hand on Chi Cheng’s shoulder, he swung his leg over and sat down.

His body was still warm from sleep. Wearing his short-sleeved and short-legged pyjamas, he leaned into Chi Cheng’s chest silently. Chi Cheng’s hand touched his back and lightly patted him twice.

Tao Huainan slowly leaned over, pillowing his head against Chi Cheng’s shoulder, burying his face in the curve of his neck.

“Xiao-ge,” Tao Huainan spoke, calling him softly.

Chi Cheng sat there with his head raised, one hand on his back. He answered, “Mm.”

“…Do I make things very difficult for you?” Tao Huainan lay on Chi Cheng’s shoulder, blinking. “Everyone’s angry at you. I know you did it to stay with me.”

“It doesn’t matter,” said Chi Cheng.

“I really didn’t want you to do that…” Tao Huainan’s voice wasn’t loud. His eyes were blank and fixed, looking at a loss. “I never imagined this. You’re so outstanding, ge and I are so proud of you. I can go to a blind school… I’m just scared, scared that there’ll be a lot of people I don’t know by your side, scared you’ll be close to someone else.”

Chi Cheng’s hand stroked Tao Huainan’s head, slowly fiddling and playing with his hair.

Tao Huainan had just woken up; his voice was soft and sluggish when he spoke. “Now what do we do? You can’t go to a university-affiliated high school anymore, and you can’t get into those other experimental schools either.”

Chi Cheng said “it’s alright”, he said “anywhere’s the same”.

“How could it be the same?” The tip of Tao Huainan’s nose pressed against Chi Cheng’s neck; every breath was filled with the scent of xiao-ge’s shower gel. “Affiliated schools are so good.”

Tao Huainan hadn’t spoken this much recent days. The child hadn’t dared to say anything; he felt like he’d caused trouble.

Now, having just woken up, he was unusually clingy, saying these painful things of his own accord, talking for ages. Chi Cheng’s embrace was very steady. Lying here like this, rising and falling that tiny bit with Chi Cheng’s breaths, it was very comfortable.

“Don’t do this again…” Tao Huainan listened to Chi Cheng’s heartbeats and said, “It hurts me a lot.”

“I said anywhere’s the same, and it is.” Chi Cheng lowered his head and looked at him; his chin was a little ticklish from rubbing against Tao Huainan’s hair.  Chi Cheng’s lips touched very lightly against Tao Huainan’s ear. He raised his eyebrows and asked, “You don’t believe me?”

–

Credits:
Author – Bu Wen San Jiu (Not Asking If It’s Three or Nine)
Raw link 
Translation – Nandemonaiya
Proofreading – Dani Dani

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Note from Nande:

Hey all, we’re taking a break for a while. Not sure how long for, but you probably won’t see an update during the Chinese New Year period. Will ping on Discord and tweet if and when we do update, or when we decide whatever it is we decide to do.

If you’re looking for Amy’s other translations, check her website. As for my other novel translations, join the Jupiter Discord and read the announcements.

Have a good Lunar New Year!