Flowers of Worship

I watched the sunrise set through the iron bars. The sun passed through a window a little bigger than the palm of my hand three times. For three days, I ate dry bread and slightly sour milk.

On the third day, the guards entered when the sun rose high. They looked at me with a bit of annoyance, then said carefully and thoughtfully.

“I’ll escort you, your highness.”

Just this morning, the guards had tossed me milk and dry bread. He had such a bad attitude, so why the change of attitude? Is this a good sign or a bad sign? It was cold around my neck. It felt like the scythe of the reaper was rubbing and touching on it.

I couldn’t even wash for three days, so my whole body was dirty and uncomfortable. Still, I thought that I would never hesitate and face my death with my chin upright. I will never be cowardly. I repeated it several times so that I won’t show it more than once.

It felt bizarre and unfamiliar to walk through the halls of the royal palace. I vaguely remember coming here in those days when I lived in the Grand Duke’s residence and was called here once or twice a year to take a test. This was the hallway I walked through at that time.

I have missed this palace for a long time. I swore that I would find everyone who had tormented me and tear them to pieces if I came back here. At that time, I always remembered the halls and auditoriums of this palace, and the prince’s room,  which I stayed in occasionally, was absolutely mine. And there were hundreds of difficult nights that I swallowed…The corridors of the royal palace that I had to walk again felt like a cold sword rather than a warm embrace.

No, the sword was warmer rather than this hallway. I remembered my sword, which they took away while being trapped in the tower. It was the first sword I ever had in my life. According to Sophie, it was initially Cilli’s sword. The sword that Cilli used when she was young. The sword Cilli received from her father. And the sword that made her a holy knight. When the sword came to me, I was comforted from the pain of not being a holy knight. I don’t know, but I was okay with not being a holy knight just by receiving her sword.

She will not know the truth on how glad I was to receive the sword.

How I wanted to kill myself when I came out of the garden’s pavilion and saw the sword lying there in the moonlight.

It’s been so long since I’ve met someone who treats me wholeheartedly, I think I’ve forgotten to treat someone like that. So I did something that I shouldn’t have done to Cilli.

I should have said sorry.

It would have been better to apologize than arrogantly taking the sword.

I’m always like this. I couldn’t even catch the chance of my life. When I was the Crown Prince, I had countless opportunities. But I didn’t even know it was an opportunity, and I just wanted to play. I liked my uncle more than my father. He swims, eats delicious food, and does what I want to do, so I didn’t even care about my future.

I promised for a long time that I would never miss an opportunity again. So, when the chance came that I might return as Crown Prince, no, to the royal family, I didn’t choose any means. Because of that, I couldn’t see my surroundings again and couldn’t think about it… missing the opportunity to apologize. Unfortunately, Cilli won’t be getting an apology from me. She will be insulted by me forever, and she doesn’t deserve to be offended.

I shouldn’t have done that.

I stood in front of the audience and looked at the door. It was a massive red door. The vast iron door that made people look feeble was barely opened until several soldiers lined from both sides pushed it. I will see what my uncle was making of the height of my father’s authority with my own eyes. I will die in empty eyes with the face of a traitor.

It was then I clenched my teeth and entered the audience room.

“Oh, the King’s nephew is here. As always, he’s still a beautiful child, isn’t he?”

An uncle I had not seen in a long time was standing there. I thought seeing him would make me angry or even want to kill him, but my gaze stayed on him for only a moment. My eyes moved unconsciously. Cilli smiled in front of him, with her red hair neatly braided.

“Yes, your majesty.”

Unlike her usual self, Cilli was wearing makeup today. Her eyes were dyed brown, and her lips were redder than usual. Her cheeks were also rosy. I was so embarrassed that I barely managed myself and almost took a step back. I knew that Cilli was a pretty person, but…

“Your highness, it’s been three days.”

She was so beautiful that she smiled like the sun, and it became unbearable because I was ashamed of being stinky and dirty. I could feel my ears burning hot with insult.

And, she was beautiful and dignified.

While I am dirty and shabby.

I want to say I’m sorry, but I can’t. I can’t really say it right now. I am so shabby, and my uncle is right in front of me. What can I tell when the man who killed my parents and usurped me is right in front of my eyes.

When I said nothing, she just smiled as if she understood. However, the smile looked as if she had to be patient for a little bit, so I was bewildered. Why? Why are you looking at me like that, as if you have my back as if I have a future?

“It seems like it suits him.” Cilli smiled bitterly at my uncle’s words. She took a distasteful attitude while my uncle was laughing. The smile was so pretentious that his eyes weren’t smiling and showed no concern for his nephew, who returned alive after five years. He knew where I was and how I was living.

I won’t forgive you.

“What do you say, my nephew?”

Uncle, no, the ‘king’ that I have to overthrow asked. As I looked at him without saying anything, he smiled benevolently and continued to speak.

“The feeling of seeing your fiance.”

Fiance?

I looked around. Who are you talking about? No way.

As he stared intently into Cilli, she wrinkled the tip of her nose in embarrassment. But that was all her reaction was.

Is she my fiance?

… I have to think.

I shouldn’t feel anything. Here is my uncle. So think about it. What’s good about her being my fiance? What is beneficial to me, and what is disadvantageous?

The benefits are many. She’s the only ‘good person’ I know. And she’s also the country’s best bride to be. The best thing about this is that my uncle has no intention of treating me as a sinner. If he intended to treat me like a criminal or a death row, he wouldn’t allow me to marry her, so this would be his gesture of accepting me like royalty. But the downside is…

“Eden.”

My uncle called me, and I raised my head. Then, looking into his eyes, I realized that thinking about it was a mistake in itself. I shouldn’t have shown you what I was thinking. He was smiling, but his eyes were much colder than before.

“When the king asks a question, the subject must answer.”

I was disgusted by the merciful pretense. For a moment, his eyes went to Cilli’s sword. Can I pull out the sword and insert it into my uncle’s heart? I thought about it, but I knew it wasn’t too late.

I’ve seen Cilli’s swordsmanship many times. She did the same thing as I did, but in fact, it was something completely different. Even Sophia was gawking at the fundamental movements with admiration. Perfection. Sophia said so. I’ve never seen a sword so perfect and neat. She will quickly subdue me, and I will end my life with dog death.

It can’t be.

My heart is burning with resentment for my underground father and my mother, who died after knowing that I was dead.

I smiled slowly. It wasn’t easy at first. However, once I succeeded in holding it, it was no big deal.

“Forgive me, Your Majesty.”

‘Your Majesty,’ good. That place, I’ll give it to you now.

But you’ll have to give it back to me. To be covered in blood.

My uncle seemed satisfied with my answer, and for the first time since he saw me, he gave me a sincere smile.

“It would be my great honor if Sarian became my wife.”

I didn’t want to call her Cilli in front of my uncle because that was the name she allowed me to.

“By what name would I be able to greet her with?” When I asked what seat he would give me, my uncle burst out laughing.

“What a child. You were also direct when you were younger. The character is still the same. Was he like that in Hastred?” At my uncle’s words, Cilli smiled, folding her eyes like a crescent moon.

“At Hastred, he was a good and kind man, favored by my employees.”

“He used to be a bit of a tricky child.”

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“Character changes, your majesty,” Cilli said with a smile, but there was firmness in her voice. A character changes. People change too. That was what she was talking about. Suddenly, I knew what she’s implying. She’s telling my uncle that I’m not dangerous. She was defending me to my uncle in the assurance that I had become obedient.

It was then that I noticed the atmosphere in this room. What happened over three days? In the meantime, Cilli seemed to have been trying to save me. I don’t know what she did. But she tried to save me by risking her marriage. I was resurrected from a sinner to royalty, and it is clear that the power Cili has comes with a great deal. Cilli was now vouching for me with herself as collateral. My uncle was reluctant to acknowledge me.

How was this possible? I couldn’t even imagine that.

“Your majesty. I am…” I looked at Cilli. She was shining golden inside. Since ancient times, gold has been considered very valuable. Something that does not change. The standard by which all precious things are measured. It shined clearly in Cilli’s eyes.

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