Chapter 16

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“Conviction.”

Looking at Cilli’s face, there was nothing I couldn’t say. Considering that she saved my life. While I was crying and cursing my uncle in hell, I thought about how much she’d run around trying to save me.

“I had been living and studying in Hastred.”

This is all a lie.

“I wish to die as a human being who has a heart.”

Of course, I have to take my uncle’s crown. That’s the debt he owes me. But I also owe Hastred to Cilli. I also have something to vomit. I have a debt that is far from being repaid .

So, it was a story that had become half the truth. I looked at my uncle and said that, and he looked at me with a startled expression. Then, he blinked and said, “… Sincerity…Is it?” he asked.

Oh, I realized at that moment that he had seen through my lies. He was surprised to see my sincerity now.

I laughed. I can honestly say this. I have to be a helpful human being to Hastred, to Cilli before becoming king because I must pay off this debt.

So I’ll say it with sincerity.

“Yes, your majesty. The conviction of wanting to live as a human being who can help Hastred.”

“….”

“That is the faith of my convictions.”

‘For a while.’

Ah, of course. I knew how to treat my uncle. I need to put some truth into it. Then I can truly wrap my lies. Seeing my face, my uncle blinked his eyes in bewilderment, then rubbed his cheek with his right hand. The face then moved to Cilli. Seeing the king’s gaze on Cilli, she knelt in response.

“Alright….”

Uncle, no, the king was bewildered. He rubbed his beard hard with his thumb a few times before opening his mouth.

“I cannot allow that.”

It doesn’t work out that easily. So it was when I closed my eyes.

“You are the King’s nephew. As a Grand Duke, should you help the country or only be of help to Hastred? You must be loyal to your country and your burden.”

The voice asking, “Do you understand?” was dizzyingly distant. I felt relieved and, at the same time, felt like vomiting. The words to be loyal to one’s country and oneself were disgusting and made me vomit.

I got down on my knees like Cilli. I was dizzy and couldn’t open my eyes, so I closed them. Then the king said,

“Lord, Eden must have been very tired. If you don’t mind, take him to the lord’s townhouse to rest. A lot will come to Eden, but it seems more important for him to rest now.”

He seemed to assume that I was exhausted from a sense of relief. It was fortunate. I didn’t correct his guesses. I just bowed my head deeper and thanked him.

Cilli came out of the audience, holding me like a child with my butt in her arms. It was the first time I had been held by someone while walking down the halls of the royal palace. Of course, it was the hallway I had always walked to be tested by someone. Didn’t I walk to go to the test of life or death? But now, it was in the hands of Cilli. There was a faint scent of flowers from the uniform wrapped around Cilli’s shoulders. I opened my mouth, thinking what kind of flower it might be.

“Why did you do that?” Cilli laughed at my question.

“What do you mean?”

“Why did you save me?”

“…”

“There is nothing worth saving.”

Like it’s not worth holding me now.

I’m dirty and smelly, but whenever I do, you hold me and carry me like I’m not. You’re erasing my scent with the scent of your flowers. You protect me so that no one, not even the king, nor the enemies of my parents, will be cruel to me so as not to kill me. It’s not really worth it to me.

“Certainly, what you are saying is true.”

Cilli whispered. When the king said he was right, Cilli’s smile grew as I muttered, “What’s right about being consistent?”

“It means that you have a straightforward personality.”

“I do not. I have changed.”

“I have told you to take your sword from me.”

“….”

“If you want me to take your sword, I have to save your highness first,” Cilli spoke in a playful tone and didn’t open her mouth further. It didn’t seem like she wanted to say the reason for saving me.

She didn’t say anything until we left the palace and got into her carriage. I didn’t speak either. I was actually dozing off with my head on her shoulder. I kept falling asleep. I slept like I’m almost fainting. Come to think of it. I didn’t sleep the whole time in the tower. I said I would get revenge, and I couldn’t think well because I was sorry for her. When everything was over, my body was so tired as if it was going to break. Even as I slept in her arms, my heart was pounding.

She spoke to someone next to me as she climbed into the carriage with me in her arms.

“Call Mr. Orsen to Istrum.”

“Where… Good… ten… .”

Her voice grew distant.

“Fever… there…”

It’s getting farther away.

And then darkness, I seem to have completely lost my mind.

After that, I was restless. It felt like someone was touching my body. I could tell that it was a doctor because of the unique smell and careful touch. The doctor touched my body and did something to me. He put a bag of cold water between my armpits and put a sweet-smelling liquid under my tongue. It wasn’t difficult to eat the potion because I tried it a few times when I was young.

Little by little, my mind came back, but I couldn’t open my eyes. It was as if the fairy had even placed a pressing stone on my eyelids. My ears could hear well, but I couldn’t keep my eyes open. I couldn’t speak, couldn’t open my eyes, and listened to the world with my ears, and then fell asleep again. Normally, it would have been very frustrating. But it was kind of comfortable.

“It was only natural to receive the title of Grand Duke as long as the marriage was decided, but I was surprised by the size of his highness’s large wealth.”

It was Sophie’s voice. The size of my wealth? Did I have any property? I listened to the voice blankly, but Cilli responded with an uncomfortable voice.

“You have nothing you can’t say in front of his highness.”

“I apologize.”

“… … .”

“But now, my lord, you must also get used to it. Not all capitals are like Istrum. No, there’s only one place like Istrum. Invitations are already pouring for the Grand Duke. You will now appear in social circles and even become his highness’s spouse. The two of you are in the same boat. If his highness behaves incorrectly, you will be in danger as well.”

“Sophie, stop it no matter how distraught you are in front of his highness.”

“Because you need to know. He’s not just an eleven-year-old, my lord.”

“Is this going to happen to your child?” Cilli’s voice grew sharp.

Sophie had a child. Well, she looked like she was in her 30s, so there was one child left. Nevertheless, it was surprising since she’s socially active. What would it be like to have to teach a child with sword art and stay next to Cilli all the time without taking care of her family? I didn’t quite understand.

Sophie yelled at her.

“If my child were in that situation, I would have been much more stern! It’s life-threatening!”

Life on the line…

The two of them were arguing over something that cost my life. Ha…Cilli sighed. She took a deep breath as she was about to say something to her and said, “I apologize for putting Paul in your mouth,” she took a step back. Paul. I repeated the name in my head. Paul. Sophie’s son’s name is Paul.

“Why are you feeling weak, my lord?” Sophie’s voice softened. But her voice was filled with her sorrow and woes.

“I haven’t weakened.”

“The Hastred for his highness, Leon would be furious if he finds out.”

“… … .”

Who is Leon?

An unknown name. Leon. Someone who will be angry with Cilli. Someone who will be mad at Cilli because of me. And Cilli put Hastred before me. I got to know one more thing.

“We all follow our lord. And… .”

“Stop.” Cilli interrupted Sophie.

“It’s too much of a stretch for you to bet Hastred, Sophie. What I made was Hastred’s contract, not Hastred. Hasted is mine. No one can take it from me. Even if you all leave Hastred, it’s mine.”

“… … .”

“Because I’m Hastred.”

“I apologize.”

“Leave and reflect on yourself.”

Soon I heard the door. Sophie seemed to be leaving. Then there was no sound for a while. So I wondered if Cilli went out with Sophie. Then I felt sorry for Cilli, who heard that because of me, and I was wondering what Hastred’s contract was, but being left alone made me a little lonely.

It was windy. A breeze blew from somewhere and tickled my hair that covered my forehead. It was a time when I felt a little lonely in the sense that it felt good and tickled.

A hand gently brushed my hair up. Then a faint scent drifted past my head. I know this smell. It is the scent of tobacco that Cilli smokes.

Cilli was by my side as the wind caressed me.

Cilli.

I wanted to call her, but my lips won’t move. As if I had become a corpse. Maybe I’ll die like this. If so, I want to leave more wealth to Cilli than I thought I had.

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My fiance isn’t my wife, so she can’t receive my property.

When I open my eyes, I  must designate her as my heir so that she’ll be able to get it. So that she can think that meeting me has benefited her even a little.

“I hope you have a good dream, your highness.”

Cilli’s hand moved away gently. But her scent of tobacco still lingered in the room. It hovered above my head like a friendly ghost so that I could sleep without the slightest loneliness.