Hate You, Love You.

After a relaxing warm bath to calm myself down, I get started on doing some reading before Mum calls me for dinner. I've been squeezing time in my busy schedule to read for the SAT's because it's in two months. I've also been trying to improve on my Maths capabilities. I bought this book online, SAT Maths for Dummies-quite fitting if you ask me because I need Maths dummed down to a level that I understand and the book does that just fine. That book and I would get along just fine.

I also made an investment in a couple of other books too along with watching videos on Youtube about how people got a perfect score. PS: Indians on Youtube are really smart. They explain things to a level that even the teachers don't cross. 

I didn't clock into work today because Aunty Fiona said she's not opening the bakery  because Uncle J needs her attention right now. Old age is a bitch, really it is. It comes with so much pain and weird illnesses like Alzheimers and dementia.

My phone buzzes on my reading table and I adjust my glasses. The name 'Jason' flashes on the screen and I smile.

Jason: Wyd?

Mel: Studying for the SAT's

Mel: You?

Jason: Same

So he studies.

Mel: That's good

Jason: Wanted to ask you something

Mel: Go on

Jason: You going to Sadie Hawkins?

Mel: Highly doubt it

Mel: You?

Jason: I would if you ask me.

His direct and straight to the point answer makes my heart and stomach flutter.

Mel: You would?

Jason: I'd do anything if you asked me

Mel: Even if I tell you to bury a body? 

Jason: I've never buried a body before

Jason: You would never tell me to do that

Jason: You're not like me. You're pure, untainted and kind. I don't think you have the heart to kill someone, much less bury a body.

Pure. Untainted. Kind.

I never considered myself to be any of these things. When I think of purity, I see the Virgin Mary and I'm pretty sure I'm the direct opposite of her. She sure as hell wouldn't invite a guy to her room and straddle him while kissing him senseless.

Untainted? I almost got raped so I think that's already out the window. I almost force-sucked the dick of 'Khalil the bastard' at knifepoint in a fucking alleyway.

Kind? I mean, I do nice things for people and I think I have a pure heart but kind seems to be a bit of a stretch.

Mel: I don't believe I'm any of these things

Jason: You are, and much more. 

Jason: You've never been told that before so I'd be the first to

Mel: If you think so

Jason: I know so

Jason: I also think there'd be many first for us

Us. There's that word again.

Mel: How'd you know there'd be an us?

Jason: Because of your confession. I told you that my offer still stands

Jason: I'm ready when you are.

Jason: Princess, don't deny how you feel because your body wants me

It's more than just my body.

Jason: We fit together, you and me and I'd wait for the moment you realize that

Fuck, I really like him.

''MEL!'' I hear my sister yell from downstairs. ''Dinner is ready so come down or I'd eat all the food.'' With an eyeroll, I send a text to Jason

Mel: I have to go. Dinner calls

Jason: Bye, Princess

Jason: The offer still stands

............…..

''What am I going to do, Paris?'' I groan as we walk to the other side of the school to attend AP Biology.

''It's easy, you ask Jason to the dance,'' she shrugs like it's that simple. The truth is, it's not that simple to ask your crush to go to the dance with you, especially if it's a dance you're not keen on going to.

''But, I don't want to go.''

''Don't be a spoil sport. He blatantly said he'd go if you go,'' she winks. ''That is so fucking cute if I do say so myself. Y'all are cute.''

''When did he say that?'' Theo looks between the both of us curiously, he's looking more at me if I'm being honest and he's not happy. ''When did this conversation happen?''

Paris shrugs with a smirk. ''Ask Mel. They've been texting back and forth.'' I shoot her a sharp look. ''Paris!'' I hiss. ''You weren't supposed to tell him that.'' I was supposed to tell him that, at a later date, maybe when I'm off to college or maybe when I started law school.

Basically, I was meant to tell him…never.

''Sorry,'' she replies apologetically. "I thought you told him since the both of you are close.''

''Well clearly I didn't.''

''He's doing the over-protective big-brother thing?''

''Yea.''

I think, no, I believe it's more than that. Theo knows something about Jason that I don't, something that he's refusing to share with me. The minute they met, hostility was pouring through their veins faster than rain from the clouds and I wondered why. To an extent, I understand why Jason was a bit put off-he probably thought that Theo and I were a thing which is really far from the truth.

As for Theo, I don't know.

''I can hear you both,'' Theo comments with an eyeroll. ''I'm standing right here.''

''Sure. But how could you not know that Mel had a crush on Jason?''

''I know,'' he stiffly says. ''But it was just meant to stay that way,'' he turns his gaze to me. ''a simple, harmless crush.''

''Well it doesn't seem that way to me.'' Paris wiggles her brows. ''Trust me, it's more than meaningless.''

As we approach the door of the classroom, our chatter dies down and Theo gives me a look that tells me the conversation is far from being over by a longshot.

Sigh.

......…

The final bell rings and I sigh in relief. Students start gathering their books, while some are already headed for the door.

''Don't forget to do the assigned reading and submit your homework by 9:00am sharp, not a second less.'' Mrs Gomez yells to those who leaving. I can't believe we still have homework when the exams are two months away. Do teachers consider our feelings at all? How am I meant to read three chapters of Shakespeare and write a report about a character with no scruples while trying to study for the SAT's? Lest I forget, some of us actually work!

Paris turns the door handle and we're mixed with the throng of students who are heading towards their lockers while some are already heading towards the double doors. 

''We're going shopping for the Sadie Hawkins.'' Paris announces. ''This Friday. Are you free?''

''Did I not say...."

''I know, but if you're not going, I am and I need your opinion on shit. Please,'' she pouts. ''We'll buy food I promise.''

She really does know how to bribe me. ''You had me at food.''

Her smile turns wide. ''Awesome. I'll text you the time and place.'' She looks at the watch on her wrists. ''Shit, I have to go home. My parents are hosting our extended family. They just arrived from Idaho and we have this mandatory dinner thing.'' She gives me a hug and high-five's Theo.

''Bye.''

When she is mixed with the crowd heading towards the door, Theo turns to me. ''When did you start texting him?'' 

''He has a name.''

I walk to my locker, grab my essential books, slam it and walk towards the door with my new car keys circling in my forefinger. 

''I don't care much for names. You should stay away from him.''

Too late for that. We've already kissed. I'm in too deep.

''I've heard you say this over and over again, yet I don't understand what exactly is in him that I need to stay away from. What did he ever do to you, huh?''

We approach the Corolla and I open it with a beep. Dumping my bag in the back seat, I approach the driver's side about to open the door handle but Theo's hand beats me to it. ''I'm serious, Mel. I'm looking out for you.''

I sigh. ''I know that and I'm grateful, but why don't you like him?'' I press further, determined to get the truth out of him.

''He's dangerous,'' he simply says. ''That's it.''

''What do you know that I don't?''

My unwavering gaze holds his and we enter a battle of wills-him determined to conceal what he knows and me trying to draw it out of him.

''Do you know who exactly you're falling for?''

''No, but apparently you know more than I do.'' I shrug. ''What did he do?''

A pregnant pause fills the space and I know he's having a battle with his mind, wondering whether he should spill what he knows or forever hold his peace.

''He's suspected of being involved in gang-related activities.''