Having Reincarnated a Million Times I Won’t Let My Guard Down Even in a Peaceful World

77: The Scent of Decay Lingers in Life

The greatest stress in life had arrived.

Surely, this stress was caused by my “obsession.” It was the stress caused by something that should not have been carved into my subconscious… something that should not have been the cause of stress.

But it would require a tremendous effort for me to remove that “carved thing.”

It’s strange for me to think like this, it’s wrong… yet, no matter what, the thought of “but still” keeps crossing my mind. That’s just how it was.

I was surprised at myself—

I really didn’t want to ask Karina for a favor…!

I couldn’t help but admit that this was an ugly side of me, but it seemed like I unconsciously looked down on Karina.

She was older and a professional manga artist.

She was the great rookie manga artist who made up one of the three great dream pursuers around me.

But still, “below”…!

In the first place, it’s foolish to find a hierarchical relationship between oneself and others.

There are plenty of people who have lost their lives over trivial hierarchical relationships— I myself have lost my life by clinging to the position of “below.”

There is no “superior” or “inferior” among unique intellectual beings.

It may occur momentarily, but it’s impossible to say “they are below because they are who they are” or “they are above because they are who they are.”

Certainly, I am superior in terms of school studies—

But in the path of manga, the other party is undoubtedly superior.

When viewed in this way, momentary superiority and inferiority arise, and it may occur between abilities, but it does not occur between personalities.

But what is this—

The tremendous stress that arises in my heart just by thinking about “asking Karina for a favor”…!

That’s right, I can imagine it. After I ask for something, Karina will get all excited… I don’t like that. I really don’t like it.

But I was a teacher.

An advisor to the Literary Club.

The Literary Club… judging by the name, I thought it would be a gathering of boys and girls who love literature, talking about writing and jotting down stories.

So, I had already prepared in advance by reading the famous literary works, and I intended to greet them as their advisor.

However, the reality was, it was a complete otaku fest.

There was more time spent drawing manga than writing literary works.

And the ratio of girls was high.

I felt a sense of fate. The inescapable scent of the sea of fujoshi. Just when I thought I had escaped from the swamp I was stuck in, I found myself in another swamp.

And from a casual remark I made, “Oh, I know the person who draws that manga,” the two swamps seemed to connect, and I was the bridge.

Surviving is the goal, but I desperately want to die.

I don’t believe in the nonsense that “if you have the determination to die, you can do anything,” but since I didn’t have any other energy to use, I contacted Karina using this desire to die.

From noble mtl dot com

Actually, I became the advisor to the Literary Club, which is a girls’ otaku fest, and I thought I should ask Karina-sensei for guidance at least once. Oh, are you too busy? You are, right? Then, never mind.

“Wait, I’ll definitely come…”

Definitely come.

“I want to interact with real middle school girls.”

Karina came to the club with a motive that seemed like that of a dangerous old man.

The students were delighted.

And they all lived happily ever after.