Episode 124 – Friend

How long has it been like this? The rooftop, which had been illuminated by the setting sun, was now almost enveloped in darkness, and I could hardly hear the voices of the students who had been working hard on their club activities. I was back to my normal self, and Sakura’s eyes were welling up, but the tears had stopped flowing.

I had managed to make peace with Sakura, but there was still one thing left to do.

“…….”

I pushed Sakura aside and got up, and Sakura, who was shaking her body in response to that, seemed to have realized what kind of posture she had been crying, and stood right next to me while her face was blushing.

“….Hey.”

“eh, ah, yes !”

Even though I called out to her, Sakura answered with a bit of confusion. Even though I was able to get rid of some of the old ties, I haven’t been able to speak properly for a long time, so honestly it’s ridiculously awkward. However, I ignore it as if to deceive it, and ask Sakura what has been on my mind for a long time.

“Who was behind this, you or her?”

“……”

“Oh, so her.”

I slowly approach the rooftop doorway, daring to make a sound with my footsteps. If I’m right, the person who arranged this should be behind that door. It’s not that I’m particularly angry, but it’s unbelievable that I was forced to reconcile like this.

“……Kanata.”

“What?”

“Um……please don’t blame her.”

While turning her face down, Sakura nailed me by saying so. Well, I’m in the mood to do something mean, but I’m completely exhausted, so I want to keep the interaction to a minimum as much as possible.

–Click

The door that would have been locked earlier was unlocked before I knew it. Someone must have opened the door at the same time they fulfilled their purpose. And that someone was sitting alone and lonely on the steps of the stairway, posture straightened. For some reason, her back seemed strangely smaller than usual.

“Even though you say it’s the last time, you came to provoke me with an outrageous guy….Yukihana.”

“……”

“Hey, at least answer me.”

Saying that, I stood next to Yukihana sitting like a doll and looked down at her. From the side, it may look like I’m blackmailing the girl, but most of the people in the school have left anyway. There’s no need to be so concerned about how it looks.

Yukihana, on the other hand, was standing next to me, but she kept her face down. She was clenching her fists in her lap. It was as if she was a child who knew she was going to be scolded.

I waited for her to start talking on her own. I felt that if I encouraged her to speak, I would not be able to hear her true feelings. But it wasn’t long before she started to speak.

“……I’m.”

“Hm?”

“……I’m not so sure about myself anymore.”

Yukihana suddenly began to speak like the beginning of an enlightening book, but her words carried a strange kind of weight. If she was the one who had been here all along and locked the door, she would have heard the exchange between me and Sakura. I wonder what she thought when she saw the scene between me and Sakura.

“I’m sorry, Kanata, I actually told her a little bit about you.”

Sakura adds some information that I don’t know from behind my back. It seems that Yukihana has heard my story from Sakura’s point of view. And in light of my past that I talked about the other day, it seems that she understood most of what happened to me. Well, she must have felt some discomfort because I had withheld the part about Sakura from her.

Well, as for me, I don’t feel uncomfortable. After all, I had gone around digging into Yukihana’s past, too. I guess we’re finally even now.

“So, what’s your point?”

I’m not an esper. I can somehow read people’s emotions, but I can’t truly understand their true nature. Sakura looks at me with a glazed-over look on her face, I decided that, unlike before, this was the right moment to step in.

“The only reason I wanted to do something about that guy was because I didn’t want to be forced to be his fiancée. But you two are different……”

That guy is surely Shinya. The reason Yukihana wanted to keep Shinya away was simply because she hated him. I’m sure she was confused when he suddenly became her engagement partner, but that’s all. If she wanted to, she could simply not write her name on the marriage certificate, or she could come up with a variety of other measures, such as contacting the local government office.

I, on the other hand, am seeking revenge against the past. Sakura, on the other hand, is probably just trying to get to the bottom of what happened to her fellow student council members who were suspended from school. Unlike Yukihana, there are no clear measures, so the weight is different. I myself am tied up in school life because of it.

“Are you trying to say that we were taken advantage of?”

“No, but yes.”

I hate to admit it, but I guess she thought that about herself when she saw us. Ever since she was a child, Yukihana has had no one other than her family to whom she could talk about her true feelings. On the other hand, I have no family or friends with whom I can talk about my true feelings. I guess there is a difference in our values in that respect as well. But there is something I thought when I looked at Yukihana now.

(I see, I finally understood why Yukikhana seemed so foreign to me when I first met her.)

It was as if Yukihana was a projection of myself, who had just gone into the shell and was just wallowing in her own regrets. She is a lost child who does not know what a friend is or how she wants to live her life. And because deep down inside she was looking for help in my life, I felt a similar presence to the people I had helped up to that point. No, I’m sure that I was looking for the same thing.

I felt as if I was finally beginning to see the true nature of Yukihana Ruri.

“In other words, you’re just a lonely person.”

“…..What the hell was that? I’m going to beat you up.”

“If you’re saying that after seeing the exchange between me and Sakura earlier, then go ahead.”

“……Tch.”

Yukihana clicks her tongue deliberately. Yukihana must have finally caught a glimpse of the difference in ability when she saw me and Sakura’s collision through the gap in the door. Even Yukihana grew up in an environment with dangerous people around her. She must have felt our strangeness firsthand. No, if you think about it carefully, it seems that I was treating Sakura appropriately.

“Hey, Yukihana.”

“What……kyaa !?”

I grabbed Yukihana’s still prone hand and pulled her up, forcing her to stand up. Yukihana was stunned and Sakura was watching from behind. Well, if it had been me just a few minutes ago, I would never have acted like this. But it is precisely because I have accepted my weakness and regret after the collision with Sakura that I’m able to do such a drastic thing.

“W-what !?”

“Are you an idiot?”

“What !?”

I told Yukihana honestly what I had just thought.

“If you have something to say, say it more clearly. At least your brother could do that.”

“W-what are you suddenly…..”

“You’re always trying to keep to your own world and complete all matters on your own, so you’ll be devastated on your own……just like me.”

This guy was always in the classroom reading a book or listening to music through her earphones, always withdrawn into her own world. Even though there should be a position of vice-president in the class, she will finish the interaction with the minimum conversation and will not install any further dialogue.

“It’s the same with working people. Many people think that if they just learn a job, they are on their own, but that is not true. When you’re faced with something unreasonable or something you don’t understand, you can honestly ask for help from the people around you, and you finally grow up and become a full-fledged member of society. At least, that’s how society is made. However, I’m not the only one, especially Sakura in the back.”

I point my thumb at Sakura behind me while saying so. And then Yukihana……

“Have you ever asked someone for help, even once?”

“That’s……”

Yukihana grits her teeth but can’t say anything back to me. I’m sure there must have been something on her mind about what I just said. In the first place, has this guy ever genuinely asked for help from someone other than her younger brother? Maybe she didn’t even ask her brother for help.

“At least I know someone who might be able to help you with your current problem. Like the guy behind me. So you called her and asked for help, right?”

With that, I try to give Yukihana an abstract idea of what she should do. I left a piece of paper with Sakura’s phone number on it in her room because I thought Sakura could be of some help to Yukihana. I didn’t expect the two of her to hang out like this, but even so, calling them was a big step forward.

“Well, you’ve made some progress by the time you’ve made friends.”

“……Who are you?”

“I’m gonna kick your ass.”

I intended to say some kind words to comfort her, but Yukihana said so while glaring at me. I felt a little uncomfortable talking about it myself. We would never have this conversation again.

But then Sakura, who had been keeping quiet about our conversation, spoke up.

“I’ve been wanting to ask you for a while now, but you two are quite close, aren’t you?”

[ [No.] ]

”You were in sync.”

Sakura stared at us as if she was dumbfounded.

“I never thought Yukihana san would become friends with Kanata. The world is surprisingly small.”

I ignored her words because I was afraid that even if I corrected her, she would immediately start to repeat her words again. But Yukihana didn’t seem to think so.

“We are not friends.”

“Eh, really?”

“More than a stranger……less than a friend.”

That word may have been the maximum concession for Yukihana. The following means that it also includes the nuance of equal. If she really didn’t approve of me, she wouldn’t have used such a roundabout way and would have used the word “not” instead of “less than”.

“…..I see.”

The two of them ended the conversation with that, but Sakura looked strangely satisfied with the conversation. If anything, I feel that the relationship between the two of them as friends fits better. I gave my phone number to Sakura to handle Yukihana’s case, but it may have worked out unexpectedly.

“In that case Yukihana san, I have one request.”

“Um, what?”

I thought Sakura had broken off with that, or maybe she was going to start a different conversation.

“As expected, calling him [You] seems a little too cluttered, so if you don’t mind, you can call him by his name.”

[ [……Huh?] ]

Not to mention Yukihana, even I unintentionally let out a voice. It is true that I have never had this guy call me by my name before. But why did she say that now?

“If you’re saying that he’s more than a stranger, I think you should call him accordingly. Yukihana san calls me by my name, right?”

Well, it seems that these two were unexpectedly closer than I had thought. I’ve never heard this guy call anyone other than her family by name, so I’m even more convinced of that. Maybe they knew each other before I gave her my phone number.

“…..Ah～”

“By the way, do you know my name?”

“……I’m not interested in three-dimensional people.”

Yukihana turns her face away and tells me that she doesn’t remember me in a roundabout way. Well, it’s almost impossible for my name to be called in the classroom, so I can’t help but feel annoyed.

“If you like two-dimensional things so much, shall I continue to call you an otaku from now on?”

“……I’ll kill you.”

“Do it if you can.”

“……You said?”

“W-wait a minute ! Just call him by his name, okay !?”

Sakura was flustered when she saw us exchanging glances with each other.

“I mean, what happened to you, Kanata? 　It feels like it’s the first time I’ve seen you enjoy making fun of people like this…..”

“That’s because your powers of observation have been dulled.”

“Oh, am I under attack too?”

Where did the tension from earlier go, and the air became somewhat strange. Or rather, school is about to close, so I want to go home early.

“Anyway, Yukihana san !”

“Haa, okay……”

“Please call him.”

Saying that, Sakura complained to Yukihana while making a scary face. The reason is that her eyes are red and swollen from crying just a few minutes ago, making her a little scary. In fact, Yukihana, who should be used to having tough-looking guys around, is slightly fading.

“…..K-Kanyata?”

“Huh?”

“Ugh, shut up ! ……Kanata.”

She bit her tongue, probably because she’s not used to calling people by their names, but Yukihana called me by my name again as if it had never happened. I mean, she call me by first name. No, maybe this guy doesn’t remember my last name ‘Shiina’. And since Sakura called me Kanata, it’s quite possible that she took advantage of that.

“Speaking of which, this may be a wild guess now, but…..”

[ [?] ]

“How long are you two holding hands?”

[ […Ah.] ]

Come to think of it, I took this guy’s hand to make her stand up and kept holding her hand as it was.

I noticed this and quickly let go of her hand. Yukihana did not react in a particularly girly way, such as blushing, but instead blatantly narrowed her eyes and looked slightly uncomfortable.

“W-well, I guess that’s the handshake as a sign of friendship between the two of you…….”

[ [No.] ]

“Hahaha……haa.”

And then, the harmonious voices of me and Yukihana permeated the completely darkened rooftop and the moon that peeped through before I knew it and disappeared. The only people left on the rooftop are me and Yukihana, who are somewhat awkward, and Sakura, who is exhausted from wringing out emotions from the bottom of her heart.

Whether or not our current hand-holding can be sublimated into something that can be called a handshake of friendship is up to us from here on out. And at the end of it all, what kind of relationship will we have?

At the edge of my mind, I subconsciously hoped that things would turn out for the better.