I'd Give Up The World For You

Rukelion hadn't expected to get so emotional about bread and jam but after the week he'd had it shouldn't have surprised him. He was so furious about Juliet capitalizing on his pain that he was of half a mind to fly to Pittsburgh and kill her. 

The only reason he didn't was the knowledge that murder worked differently here and he could spend the rest of his life in prison if he was caught. That wouldn't do. 

It took incredible effort though. He had far too much to think about and it ended up making him go quiet in such a way that it worried Daisy. She was so sweet, going out of her way to make one of his favorite foods to cheer him up. That was one of the many things he loved about her. 

He only cried because he had never thought he would be able to experience something from home again like that. Everything tasted exactly the same as it had all the times he helped her make it. 

That got to him. Having something familiar in a sea of unfamiliarity pushed him over the edge. 

Rukelion missed the way things used to be. He missed his less complicated life where his wife actually loved him and he didn't have to pretend that he wasn't a fictional character. Pretending to be Leo May hadn't been nearly as difficult as pretending to be Leo Blaze was. 

Then he didn't have to learn entirely new customs and he had the benefit of knowing Daisy was there waiting for him to come home. She certainly wasn't doing that now. 

She had agreed for him to stay the night though. That offered him some measure of relief. He got the best night's sleep since he took care of her when she was sick and felt refreshed and ready to tackle the world again. 

Today was primarily an errand day. She had a lot of household chores to do and needed to go to the bank and a few different stores. He went with her to all of them and then made as if to drop him off back at his apartment. He looked at her and frowned. 

"You normally let me stay with you all day on Sundays."

Daisy sighed and fiddled with a strand of her hair, not meeting his eyes. "I know. I'm here so you can get your stuff. I'm not making any promises but for the time being you can stay with me so you don't have nightmares. Sleep is important."

Rukelion's grin grew so wide it threatened to split his face. "You mean it?!"

"Yeah. Go before I change my mind."

He practically sprinted up the stairs to his apartment and shoved what little he owned into his suitcase in record time. He came down with it and his pot with the daisy sprouts as quickly as he could. 

Daisy raised an eyebrow when she saw that was all he had. "This is it? Do you have stuff in storage or something?"

"No. This is everything."

"Your whole life is seriously in this one suitcase?! Even I had more than that when I—"

She cut herself off. He was willing to bet she was about to say 'when I was in foster care.' He had done a fair amount of online research about what being in the system was like and had read some real horror stories. 

A common thread seemed to be traveling from house to house with nothing but trash bags to put their belongings in. His single suitcase seemed less sad by comparison. 

Rukelion couldn't explain that he hardly owned anything because he had lived in this world for less than six months and had arrived with nothing but the clothes on his back at the time. That wouldn't go over well.

"…I travel light."

Daisy seemed simultaneously skeptical and grateful he didn't press the issue. They traveled back to her apartment and unloaded things in silence. 

She didn't speak again until she saw him set his suitcase down. "I don't have a second dresser for you but there should be some hangers and a little space in the closet for things that need to be hung up."

"That's fine. I've been living out of the suitcase anyway. I'm used to it," he reassured her. 

She gave him a rather sad, weary look and sat down on the couch. "Not even bothering unpacking because you'll only have to pack again, huh? I've been there."

Rukelion was sure she had. The farmhouse had been the longest she had ever lived in a single place according to the file Maxwell put together. He was determined to change that. As soon as they could afford that house in the country they would never move again. 

Daisy hadn't made any commitments but she was letting him stay for now and that happened sooner than he had anticipated. She was thinking the rest of what he had rather vaguely offered over rather than shooting him down so she had to at least be considering it. He was wearing her down. That was a specialty of his. 

Although, he had been messing up more and more as time went on. His emotional state was all over the place. It was a miracle she hadn't driven him out because he cried on her yesterday. 

He couldn't let that happen again. He had to show her he was dependable!

The problem was that right now he wasn't. He needed his wife's love to be a stable human being and always had. She was his lifeline. 

Having her partially was the most beautiful kind of torture. He needed more from her. He needed everything! Forever! Not having that anymore was really throwing him off on top of all that he was dealing with in a new world with additional trauma. 

At least Rukelion was finally able to sleep. If he did have a nightmare he would wake up and see his wife lying peacefully in his arms, safe and sound. That would help him go back to sleep so he didn't wake up exhausted every day. Not being so tired should help with his emotional state somewhat.

Now that he was living with Daisy again there was no real reason to work at the same place as her. He was going to see if he could start taking community college classes in the summer and knock out as many as possible before transferring to the University of Cincinnati. 

According to his research, not only was it easier to get into community college it was cheaper. He needed it to be cheaper because he would have to take out loans to fund furthering his education in this world. 

This was all a part of his plan. He had intended to go to college as soon as he knew what it was and looked up a list of the highest-paying jobs and how to procure them. 

Rukelion didn't want to be a doctor or lawyer because that would take far too much time. He focused his search on jobs that paid well with nothing but bachelor's degrees and had narrowed it down to a few options. He wanted to make at least as much as Daisy did so he could help her out properly. 

He was determined to be helpful to her. If he was, that was the most likely way he would convince her it was worth keeping him around. As much as he hated it, he couldn't push his luck with loving her more than she wanted. 

He had gotten away with quite a lot considering how often she insisted she hardly knew him but he was afraid of pushing her too far. It was a delicate balance. 

The horribly ironic thing was that she knew him better than anyone else. They had been married and expecting a child together! She knew more about his pain, his hopes and dreams, his likes and dislikes, and his daily habits better than everyone else he knew combined. Or she had before she forgot she ever met him. 

Though Rukelion was trying hard to think of this clean slate as a blessing in disguise that didn't change the fact that it was incredibly painful. His heart went through a blender at least five times a day because she didn't know him or love him. 

Yet. He had to remind himself that it would happen. It had happened once and it would happen again!

He was one step closer to accomplishing his goal. He might not be Daisy's boyfriend but he was living in her apartment and sharing a bed with her every night. He hadn't managed to make it that far until after they had been married for a while the first time. 

Things weren't as hopeless as they appeared. He was going to be fine. Everything was going to work out the way he needed it to. All he needed was to be patient. 

He had spent nearly half his life being patient. It wouldn't kill him.. Probably.