My Little Secret

(Ivan Radcliffe)

I never thought I'd get to see this expression on Sofia's face. Disappointment. She was disappointed in me, I did not know why.

"Is everything okay?" I ask her.

She looks at me, surprised.

"How can you ask that question after what you've done." She says.

What did I do?

"The diary, it's something personal Ivan. It wasn't for your amusement." She said looking upset.

I get nervous, how did she know about that? Nobody saw me taking the pictures, I had made sure of that. I did not even look at them, I deleted them, I deleted each and every one of them. Regardless,

"Sof, I can explain." I say,

"Give me my diary back" she asks sternly.

"Diary? I don't have it, I swear" I say honestly. She did not seem to believe me. I hated this feeling. I did not want to be here. I did not want her to look at me like that. I had come to apologize for running away the other day and here I was, being suck into a deeper hole. Why did she think I stole her diary? Was it missing?

"I don't have it Sof"

"Don't call me that, Ivan" she says seriously, "why did you come closer to me huh? How did you know about the diary? Are you using me?" she asks, tears in her eyes. I had broken her trust.

"Please believe me, I don't have the diary, Sofia" I say coming closer to her.

"Get out, Ivan. Don't ever come near me again." She says plainly. Her tears had dried out. Her emotions had left her face.

"Let me explain" I argue, "No, just go. I'm requesting you." She says looking away.

"Victor was right, I do need to stay away from you." She says, holding back tears and walks away.

Of course, Victor. I leave the borrowed book by the table and walk out. I wasn't going to stand there and let her misunderstand me. I couldn't believe the fact that she trusted Victor over me, especially after everything she had seen about him.

I kept reassuring myself. She cared about me, about what I thought. No wonder she had reacted that way. She looked so disappointed, kinda made me hate myself. I was never going to make up for this, unless I had proved him wrong. I did not have the diary and I had to make sure Sofia knew that.

My phone started buzzing with messages all of a sudden. I go to put it on silent when I get a call from my assistant. What now?

"Yes, Ruby" I answer it as I get into the car.

"I hope you haven't read the news Iv" she says sounding nervous.

"Um, no. Why? What's going on?" I ask sounding curious.

"It's Catherine"

"Is she okay?" I ask, worried. This was getting worse.

"She's fine, it's just that.." Ruby says slowly.

"Ruby! What is it?" I ask getting annoyed.

"She's kinda on a date, with Ashton" she says and pauses.

"Date? What do you mean date?" I ask almost laughing. This must be a joke.

I start the car and hear Sofia calling out my name from the back.

"Ivan, stay" she says and opens the door.

"I know what's happened with Catherine, Hilda just told me. There's gonna be media at your place, stay till it's late and safe enough and then go home. You need some time. I'm sorry about what happened. I knew you loved her." She says apologetically. "This doesn't mean I forgive you though." She turns back and walks back to Absolem.

I go in. I felt numb. I did not know what to do, what I could do, what I could've done. If it was my fault that she decided to cheat on me. Sofia marches inside. She comes back later with a cup of coffee. How was she so calm in a situation like this? I looked at her wondering what was going on in her mind.

"There's nothing wrong with you, Ivan. Whatever she did, it's on her." She manages to say while putting the books back in the shelf. I was genuinely taken aback by how calm she was in situations like these.

"Thank you" I say softly.

She takes out her notes and starts writing, ignoring me. I got back to brooding over Catherine, then remembered what Sofia had just told. I look at her, she looked so serious as she made notes, yet there was some sadness in her eyes. She had so many emotions and so many sides to her, every time she showed a new one, I was surprised. I saw a different side today. Compassion.