Savage Divinity

Love is magical.

There is a power to love, an imperceptible, immeasurable, ineffable quality which mere words cannot express, but the power is undeniably there. I feel it now, flowing through me with a warmth that has nothing to do with the heat of Mila’s body pressed against mine or the burning flames keeping our tiny bronze bathtub comfortably hot. With her in my arms, I feel like I can Cloud-Step a thousand miles and run ten-thousand more without breaking sweat, a task I would do a hundred-thousand times over just to keep her by my side. Love is renewing and refreshing, an invigorating nectar that cleanses my mind, energizes my body, and nourishes my soul in ways which can only be described as enlivening, giving me more of everything I need to forge ahead. A moment’s rest against her freckled shoulder is better than a full night’s sleep, and a taste of her pouty lips more delicious than a full-course, five-star meal, and having her here and now trapped within my embrace reminds me of how I’ve been sleepless and starved for far too long.

My lust and hunger is a stark warning of love’s darker side, for it can be addicting, demanding, selfish, and controlling when we let love take control. Love is work, love is sacrifice, love is forbearance, but above all, love is necessary, because without love, life has no meaning. This is why we do awful, horrible things when love is lost or taken away, for while love brings out the best humanity has to offer, it can also give rise to the worst. I and many others would go to great lengths to reclaim what has been lost, or mete out justice when recovery proves impossible. Love is beautiful, but it can turn ugly all too easily, whether it be a love denied, lost, or unrequited, love is a power which can be abused or misused like any other. Thus we must strike a careful Balance with love, as we must in all other things.

It’s said it is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all, but I’m not entirely convinced. What would I do if my love was lost? How would I live without Mila in my life? Without Yan, Lin-Lin, Li-Li, or even Luo-Luo? Without my parents, my sister, my niece and nephew, my brother-in-law, my best friend, my rival, or my floofs? Not well, that much I can say, and I would do anything to get them back. I would kill, rend, and torture to recover the people I love, accept any allies or powers which might be of assistance, even if in the end it costs me more than I lost, because without love, there is no reasoning.

All of which means I must cherish the love I have while I still have it, and though the body is bruised and weak, the mind and spirit are more than willing. My roaming hands make their way slowly across Mila’s bare skin, touching, stroking, and exploring whatever they come across, her body a temple I wholeheartedly intend to worship before, but her steely grip clamps down on my wrists before matters progress too far as she chuckles softly in my embrace. “You,” she begins, punctuating the word with a soft kiss on my nape as she draws my arms around her while keeping my hands safely away, “Are insatiable.” Releasing my arms and wholly expecting me to keep them still, she sits up, covers up her bared breasts, and shoots me a coquettish glance, sending mixed signals as she wiggles her hips whilst still seated in my lap to get a better angle to face me. “Left to you, we might never emerge from this bath ever again, not until someone comes looking and finds us in all our shame.”

“Nothing shameful about a man and his beloved wife having an afternoon bath.” Wincing as I sit up to reestablish our embrace, I kiss her deeply in quiet thanks for sparing my wounded pride. Even my refined physique turned into a Spiritual Heart isn’t enough to wholly dampen the effects of Mila’s enthusiastic response to my amorous affections, but at least I didn’t break or dislocate anything this time around, proving I am at least durable enough to eschew the need for reinforced restraints every time we want to get frisky.

Though I wouldn’t mind bringing those out every now and then, just for a bit of extra fun...

A thought which re-ignites my smouldering passions and sets my hands to roaming once more, but while Mila’s lips doth protest, her actions do not match her words as she submits to desire, both hers and mine. My strong and domineering wife turns meek and compliant once the clothes are off, a stark contrast which sets my blood to boiling, and after so many weeks and months of separation, we both seem determined to make up for lost time as quickly as possible.

And once we are breathless and spent, we sink back into the bath and bask in the afterglow, our lips pressed lightly together as neither one of us wants to break off. What did I ever do to deserve someone as amazing as Mila? I have no idea, but I will spend a lifetime making up for this immense karmic debt. “I love you,” I gasp, drunk on her taste, and her smile tells me everything I need to know in return.

“I love you too,” she replies, leaning back to meet my gaze as she rests her head on my shoulder, savouring my touch as much as I relish hers. There we sit until my body recovers and I feel my passions mounting once again, only seconds before Mila feels my ‘passion’ too. Laughing with her eyes while pursing her lips, she playfully presses her fist into my face and says, “Any more and my legs will give out and you’ll have to carry me around for the rest of day, assuming your battered body holds out.” Though reluctant to end things here, my dutiful wife slips out of my grasp and exits the tub at last, a mock scowl etched across her beautiful face as she sits on a stool and sets to soaping up once again. “Besides, what will people say if you return from a leave of absence just to shirk your duties and spend time with your insignificant wife, indulging in lust and passion?”

Again with this argument, as if the outer provinces can’t function without me. “Insignificant wife? Never.” Leaning over to take her hand, she slaps my fingers away, so I settle for resting a hand on her knee, the bathroom too small for her to escape from my reach. “And nothing will ever be more important than my wives.” A statement which elicits a tiny wince, one which fades as soon as it appears, but not before I catch it in plain view. I had to be honest and say ‘wives’ rather than ‘you’, and it pains me to see her hurt by the admission. Though Mila loves Yan and Lin-Lin like sisters, I’m sure she would love to have me all to herself, because who in their right mind wants to share their beloved husband with another woman, much less two to four others? I am a horrible, lustful man, and unrepentant to boot, because even though I know it hurts Mila to have to share me, I still intend to chase after other women. My beloved deserves better, but I cannot bear to abandon my love for Lin-Lin, Li-Li, or even the possibility of love with Luo-Luo, nor can I bear the thought of setting Mila free to find someone else who will love her and her alone.

“You are an idiot.” Splashing me with the bathwater to drive her statement home, Mila leans over for a quick kiss as she fills her basin to rinse off with. “Your thoughts flit about from one mood to the next like an indecisive bee in a field of flowers. I can’t imagine how exhausting it must be keeping up with all those conflicting emotions.” Another reminder that I need to get my Aura in check, but most of the sting of her harsh statement is mitigated by the sight of water running down her naked body, and I forget how to breathe for the next few seconds. Noticing my distraction earns me another splash, but she makes no move to hide or turn away as she rinses off a second time. Then a third, which is when I finally realize she’s teasing me, but my efforts to entice her into another round fall woefully short. “Wash up and get dressed,” she says, slipping just out of reach to towel off in a provocative fashion, knowing full well what she’s doing is driving me mad and enjoying every second of it. “We’ve been in here long enough for people to talk, and I’ll not be the one to explain it.”

That being said, she makes no move to leave after throwing on her bathrobe and simply stands there waiting and watching, her smirk out in full force as she intends to ogle as good as she got. Honestly, when it comes to leering, Mila is almost as bad as Yan now, though thankfully not as vocal about her appreciation in public, and I feel my cheeks heat up as I try to feign nonchalance and recline back in the bath to hide my shame. “I don’t have much to do, really,” I explain, still wanting to spend more time in her arms rather than go out and face dreadful reality. “I mean, Luo-Luo, Liu Xuande, the Marshals, and the Colonel Generals are all working on a plan, so until they have something concrete for me to go over, there’s no point showing up. I’ll just slow things down with my stupid questions while they struggle to give face, so it’s best to stay away until they have all their ducks in a row.”

“Have you given any thought to laying down to rest? Your injuries are not few.” Gently running her fingers alongside my stitched wounds and fresh bruises, the question is there in Mila’s eyes but she doesn’t want to press me for too much, wondering why I don’t just Heal my injuries like I always do, but worried it touches upon some secret I cannot share, whether be because telling her might affect her Dao or because I myself am not sure and the doubt would be my undoing.

“This is nothing,” I tell her, as her eyes linger on some fresh bruises resulting from her passionate embrace. “I’ve had much worse, so don’t you worry, beloved.” Gesturing at the injuries, I switch to Sending for the sake of privacy, even though I already have a Sound Barrier in place. “The reason I’m not Healing myself is because it’s simply not worth it.”

It’s clear from her expression that my beloved Mila doesn’t believe me, given the extent of my injuries. The vast catalogue begins with the bruise on my cheek, courtesy of Gerel’s teachings, and includes a whole host of scrapes, cuts, and bruises which aren’t worth mentioning, many of which are courtesy of my enthusiastic beloved wife. I also have a pulled shoulder and sprained ankle courtesy of the opening exchange with Gongsun Qi, as well as hairline fractures along both forearms from the subsequent trades. My back hurts from carrying Lin-Lin and Ping Ping the entire way back from the monastery, and I’ve got a tiny bit of internal bleeding along my left abdomen, where I bruised a few ribs while fighting Half-Demonic Warriors. All in all, fairly insignificant injuries considering I went toe-to-toe with a Colonel General in the prime of health, and all easily Healed if not for the minor, thus far insignificant fact that I refined my entire body into a Spiritual Heart.

Earlier when I first tried to Heal the Abbot, he told me, “Damage done during a battle between Divinities is not limited to mere flesh and bone. Suffice it to say, my injuries go beyond the physical, and even your unique Healing method is not enough to save me.” I thought he meant Divinities had access to some powerful, non-physical attacks, but the truth is a little more complicated than that. In order to mend the divide between my body, mind, and soul, I refined my body into a Spiritual Heart by melding the physical and the metaphysical together as one. I am a human made of blood, bones, organs, and tissue, but I am also more than just what you would see if you cut me open and looked around. I have a Core to store my Chi and a circulatory system to distribute it throughout my physique, and while I lack the ability to quantify those metaphysical systems, I merged them with my physical being with help from the Energy of the Heavens.

Essentially I am the Core, and the Core is me. Thus, any damage to me, in turn will damage my Core, which as I’ve long since established is either a part of or made up of my Soul. All of this means that every scrape, bruise, fracture, or puncture will also damage my Core and my Soul, the ramifications of which I have yet to wholly explore or understand, because I only just figured it out last night and haven’t had a chance to speak with any Divinities. Taddy and Monk Bones have been busy Healing Imperial soldiers all night, while the Abbot has yet to wake from his coma and recuperating in the monastery, though he should be back on his feet soon enough. I thought about looking for Guard Leader to bounce my questions off of, but given her... err, aversion to critical thinking, I figured asking her for guidance would be barking up the wrong tree. All I really know is that even though I am stronger and tougher than before, I’m far from invulnerable or impervious to attacks. A dagger will still cut me and a mace still concuss me, though it takes a little more effort to do so than before. The downside is that it now takes an inordinate amount of Chi to Heal my wounds through Panacea, and I don’t even know where to begin Healing using traditional methods, because my body is more than just the physical now. While I lack any ability to accurately measure my expenditure, it feels like I’m using anywhere from five to fifty times the Chi depending on the severity of the injury when Healing with Panacea, which I suppose gives me a general idea of how much more complex my body has become. Even though I have the ability to Devour Chi and have access to as much as I need, refining my body into a Spiritual Heart has not made me immune to the side effects of using too much Chi either, hence my throbbing migraine and minor bout with insomnia, as well as my decision to leave my injuries to Heal on their own, albeit at an accelerated rate compared to your average Martial Warrior.

Sharing all of this with Mila in as much detail as I dare, I hold back on any practical details as I would hate for her to try and replicate my success with what might well be flawed or incomplete information. I have no idea how I succeeded in refining a Spiritual Heart, and I suspect I would have failed if I didn’t have access to usable Heavenly Energy, which I no longer have. I’m not even sure if Human Divinities or Ancestral Beasts even have Spiritual Hearts, but I assume they do and it has something to do with Shattering the Void. “All this means I need to rethink my approach to close combat,” I Send, pursing my lips with a sigh as I reluctantly exit the hot water and come face to face with the searing hot blaze hidden behind Mila’s expressive and appreciative eyes. “Which sucks, considering how Gerel just proved how outmatched I am against a readied opponent. Give flesh and break bone was like, my whole shtick, so now I gotta come up with something new, fresh, and exciting.”

“Idiot.” Rolling her eyes at my statement, Mila sits me down on the stool and proceeds to lather my back, a service I would enjoy much more if she would remove her robes again. “Just learn to fight properly and avoid injuries like everyone else. Is that so difficult?”

“Well... yes.” Making the most of this rare indulgence, I bask in my beloved wife’s ministrations while Sending my thoughts as they come to me. “Killing unsuspecting foes in the chaos of battle is one thing, but going toe to toe with a Peak Expert is an entirely different kettle of fish, and it’s clear I’m sorely lacking in both foundation and experience. Being a prime target means I’ll be facing stronger and stronger opponents, which becomes problematic if I can’t protect myself, especially now that I need Pong Pong to keep tabs on Rakshasa and can’t count on his Turtley intervention to save my ass. Sure, I survived a clash with Gongsun Qi, but our exchange lasted for less than a full second before your mother arrived to save me, which means I still have a long way to go before I can call myself a Peak Expert.”

And the Abbot wants me to just Shatter the Void, like it’s that easy and I’m an idiot for not seeing it sooner...

“Yes, how terrible for you,” Mila retorts, unceremoniously dumping a basin of water over my head. “Twenty two years old and still not a match for a Peak Expert in single combat. How will you ever live with the shame?” Grabbing my chin to kiss me forcefully, she pushes me away when I try to escalate things once more, her scowl not at all a match for her blazing red cheeks. “Your issues are just all the more reason for you to rest and avoid injury, idiot. There are other things you could do as well, like practice more, show your face around the Citadel to raise morale, or arrange a banquet to recognize heroes deserving of a reward.” Scowling as she upends another basin of water over my head, she gives my heated ardour a pointed look and adds, “Even if you believe you don’t have anything better to do, I most certainly have other matters to attend to. While you struggle against Peak Experts, my Martial strength is still lacking compared even to my sane and rational peers, so I must work hard and persevere in order to progress further along my Path.”

Her repeated attempts to cool my passions has no effect, for the heart wants what the heart wants. The same goes for the penis, and I have about as much control over one as I do the other, namely none whatsoever. That being said, there is no doubt in my mind that this woman is deeply in love with me, and I in love with her, knowledge that would fill me with warmth and joy on even the coldest, most desolate of nights. Ignoring Mila’s amused smile and quiet refusal to indulge my lacking self-control, I take a deep breath and think unsexy thoughts while trying to also hold a conversation. “Well, I don’t have any general advice regarding the Martial Path, but is there something in particular that you’re stuck on?”

Ready with an answer on hand, Mila throws my bathrobe at me and says, “The Mountain Collapsing Stomp. You, Luo-Luo, Mother-in-Law Sarnai, and Yan have all found some success with it in vastly different manners, while I have yet to grasp even the basic concept behind it.” Tying my robes so tightly I might have to cut myself out of them, my beloved wife deems it safe to take a seat on my lap once more, wiggling about in devilish delight as she flutter kicks her feet in the air. It turns out my strong and dynamic wife enjoys being cradled in my arms, especially now that I’m strong enough to carry her weight without straining. Stealing a quick kiss, she leans against my shoulder and I marvel how her wet hair frames her freckled face oh-so-perfectly as she contemplates how to best give voice to her question. “I suppose my biggest issue is that I don’t understand how to both contain and build-up momentum at the same time.”

“Mm...” Rather than tell her how to direct her Chi, I feel it would be better to demonstrate how the concept works instead, and let her figure out the rest from there. Turning about so I’m sitting next to the tub while Mila is facing it, I gesture at the water and try to put my thoughts into words, a task made all the more difficult as she takes advantage of my distraction to slip her hand into my robes and stroke my bare chest. Unfair. When she does it, it’s just normal and natural, but when I try to do the same, I’m an incorrigible pervert.

Though to be fair, in spite of all the accusations she throws around, it’s not like she’s ever stopped me...

“Imagine your Chi is the water,” I begin, at which point Mila’s glassy-eyed gaze turns to razor-sharp focus, eager to learn and progress as ever. “And the basin is you or your weapon.” Tapping the water’s surface, I send a ripple through the tub emanating outwards in all directions, though the effect is somewhat ruined by the small receptacle. Central is big on personal bathtubs, which are barely big enough to fit two, and this demonstration would work much better in a larger bath like the one I had built in my Northern Citadel manor. “See how the ripples move? That is the transference of force from my hand to the water’s surface. That force then travels through the water until it reaches the sides of the bathtub, at which point the force is reflected back in the other direction.” Tapping a few more times in steady rhythm, I set the bath water to roiling in turbulent agitation, with the ripples growing larger and larger as time moves on. “This right here is a representation of the basic concept in a nutshell, building waves of energy up through timing and repetition without allowing it to escape. Granted, a lot of momentum is lost to the sides of the tub, and the shape is not ideal for reflection of forces in equal distribution, but overall, it takes much less effort to agitate the waters than if I were to stick my arm in and manually stir it about. I’m sure it’s a game every kid plays when they’re young, scooting up and down the bathtub to make waves and splash water all about, and it takes a lot out of them to get the water to roiling.”

“Maybe here in Central.” Her tone rife with amusement while watching me play, she explains, “People tend to frown upon children splashing in the communal baths back home.”

“Right, right.” Weird though, because I totally remember splashing about and having a grand old time, especially when challenged to see who could splash more. Maybe that was from my past life then, since the memory is so vague it might as well be imagined. “Regardless, the concept remains the same.”

Though Mila has nothing to say, I can tell she’s unsatisfied with my explanation, one I’ve given before. I’ve also likened it to using a swing, but that didn’t help her either. A thought occurs to me and I try a different tack, gesturing at the ceiling overhead and the sun hidden behind it. “You know, light behaves in a similar fashion.”

“How so?”

“Well, imagine a steady source of light, one suspended in mid-air with nothing around it. No candle, no torch, no lantern, just light itself, no other objects whatsoever.” Tapping the still water again, I draw her attention to the singular ripple and continue, “From that source, light emanates outwards in all directions, moving at the same speed without variation until it can illuminate no further, creating a perfect sphere of light.” Pointing at the sconces on the wall, I continue, “Now imagine a shuttered lantern encompassing that source of light. Inside, the light still travels outwards in all directions, but now it also bounces off the sides of the lantern, and thus the luminosity within the lantern is much brighter than it would be outside of it. This is also why the light travels farther when you open the shutter, because the lantern aims more light in one direction.” Seeing Mila’s lack of response, I purse my lips and stifle a sigh. “I’m not explaining it well, nor is this really helping you comprehend the Mountain Collapsing Stomp, but I can’t really think of a better way to describe it.”

“No, I understand what you’re trying to say, but I can’t seem to translate it into anything of practical use.”

Kissing her on the forehead as she snuggles in for comfort, I hold her close and take in her scent while trying my best to console her. “Well, maybe it’s better if you stop thinking about it for a bit and focus on something else. You have many other attainments just waiting within reach, and you can always come back to this later.” Like learning how to utilize her Blessing, which even I don’t really understand. How does the Blessing of Sun work? How is it different from a Blessing of Light? I mean, technically the Blessing of Light would be some combination of air and fire, but the Blessing of Sun is an Esoteric Blessing, meaning it’s made up of all four elements. I don’t get how that works either, not really. I get that the four Primal Blessings of Earth, Fire, Air, and Water are not exactly those four concepts, but rather representations of the fundamental forces of the universe, but that’s about as useful as saying cars run on gasoline. Good to know, but not the most useful information when I’m trying to build an engine, which is why I have no idea how to use my Blessing of Water.

In the same vein, me telling Mila about water in a tub or light in a vacuum doesn’t help her comprehend the Mountain Collapsing Stomp, but I don’t know how else to help her. Glancing at her Spiritual Weapons laid out next to the tub, it strikes me as such a shame that she’s stuck on this concept, because her circular Spiritual Shield makes for a geometrically perfect vessel for the Mountain Collapsing Stomp. Or Mountain Collapsing Shield Bash, I guess is what we would call it, but whatever. Either way, being a perfect circle makes it so much easier to visualize the movement of the Chi, because you just start from the exact centre and let each ‘wave’ of Chi propagate in all directions, like pulsing radio waves from an antenna. The image pops up in my mind without even having to try, concentric circles of energy emanating from the shield’s centre and moving along the exterior surface only to crash into the rim and be reflected back along the interior, with each circle feeding into next as they return to the source and resulting in a steady growth of power contained within.

Honestly, it should work the same with light, seeing how light behaves as a particle and a wave, right? Store ‘Sunlight’ Chi in the shield and build it up until it’s ready to be unleashed, meaning Mila could fire literal laser beams at her foes. The shield’s even shaped like a convex lens, which is what you would use to focus sunlight if you were trying to start a fire, meaning the concept still fits. Granted, the shield is opaque, but considering we’re talking about magic here, I’m not entirely sure that matters. If only I could share these thoughts with my beloved along with my comprehension of the underlying principles alongside it. Then again, I’m fairly certain my grasp of physics is shaky at best and I’ve probably got more than a few concepts wrong, but Chi does a lot of the heavy lifting, though nowhere near as much as Heavenly Energy.

Sliding out of my embrace without so much as a word, Mila shuffles over to her weapons and takes them in hand. Tucking Paragon into her belt, she takes a seat on the damp floor before laying the spear across her knees and the shield over-top it, running her hands over the latter while staring deep into its reflective surface. Catching myself before I speak, I snap my mouth shut and quietly Conceal myself so as not to disturb her, for it appears my beloved, talented wife has stumbled across yet another Insight. What a woman, a Warrior and craftsman of the highest calibre whose name will echo across the Empire in the years to come.

Tip-toeing out of the bathroom, I leave the Sound Barrier in place and send my Death Corps guards to find a Concealment capable woman to watch over Mila as she meditates. I don’t think anything will go wrong, but better safe than sorry, and I can’t risk interrupting her Insight for the sake of her modesty. Soon enough, my sister arrives with a beautiful smile etched across her face, happy to help and be a part of this momentous occasion. Honestly, Mila has more Insights than anyone else I know, and succumbs deeper too, which is only proof of her phenomenal talents which have secured her a place at the forefront of her peers. Even I am in awe of her skills, because unlike me, she has a deep understanding of everything she can do, including Divine Blacksmithing which is still a complete mystery to me.

Leaving my wife in my sister’s capable hands, I head out to check on the floofs and find the bears cowering behind some hedges and living up to their reputation as the most cowardly of floofs in my entire menagerie. Contrary to their large size, Banjo and Baloo are a fearful and panicky pair, prone to freezing up under duress and hiding in the silliest locations, as evidenced by the fact that the hedges are only tall enough to hide their heads, leaving their big furry butts in plain view. In their defence, they never really learned how to survive on their own. At least the wildcats know enough to run up a tree, but despite possessing the same capabilities, the bears tend to go to ground whenever they’re scared.

And scared they are, mostly due to Rakky’s intimidating presence.

Though laid out along a wall, the massive tiger is a fearsome sight to behold, and I want nothing more than to curl up next to his belly and be the small spoon to his big one. The only thing stopping me is the fact that I’m not suicidal, so I’ll have to appreciate his majesty from afar and resist the temptation to touch the forbidden belly floof. There are only three animals present who are not terrified of Rakky, the first being Tai Shan, who sits beneath the cherry tree with his adorably vacant expression while eating bamboo like it’s ice cream and the freezer is broken. The second is Ping Ping who is enamoured with the tiger’s floof, and lastly we have sweet, stupid George, whose furry white butt is currently protruding out from under the tiger’s massive paw. Thankfully, the dumb bun is still breathing, but he’s also fast asleep, which has left Rakky in a state of complete confusion and probably dealt a crippling blow to his pride as well, keeping his paw on the little intruder, but also pretending not to notice him at the same time.

While Pong Pong has made it clear that all floofs are friends, if Rakky takes a bite out of Georgie, I’m not sure I’m even allowed to be mad. At some point, you just gotta chalk it up to Darwinism and accept that sweet, stupid George was not meant for this cruel, merciless world.

Planting myself between the bears, I settle in to comfort my pets while wondering how to fix the epidemic of doom and gloom plaguing the Citadel. I genuinely do not understand the mentality of the average Martial Warrior. We won a stunning victory yesterday, snatching victory from the jaws of defeat thanks to some quick thinking from Akanai to send the Peak Experts ahead alongside the Tyrant’s Runic Cannons. However, because there was no epic final fight to culminate the long-fought siege, the soldiers of Central feel like they’ve been robbed of their victory and allowed a golden opportunity to slip through their fingers. Never mind the fact that even though the bulk of the Enemy army got away, the Runic Cannons still caused significant casualties during the retreat, or how chasing after them with a tired army of soldiers and an overabundance of Peak Experts would have resulted in too many casualties within both groups. No, those facts are unimportant, because G.I Joe didn’t get to stab his fleeing foes in the back, and that makes him sad.

At least, that’s what the Colonel Generals told me, and I have no idea where to go from here, which is why I left it for them to decide our next steps. Whether it be a banquet, speech, parade or whatnot, I’ll do whatever is necessary to raise morale, even though I feel like they’re all pouting over nothing.

The downside of being so good at delegating my work is that there are times when I have nothing to contribute, hence why I sought out Mila for lunch and company. Everyone else is either busy with work or catching up on some much needed rest, which I probably should do as well considering the fact that my throbbing migraine has yet to subside. Add to this the fact that I feel restless and unable to sleep, and it’s clear I’m suffering from a mild case of Chi over-consumption. Overuse? Overexertion? Whatever. Side effects can include depression, psychosis, and development of multiple personalities, so I decided to take this seriously. Alas, there’s no real cure except time and rest, meaning I can’t use Chi for anything unless it’s an emergency, or you know... indulging my beloved wife. It sucks, especially considering there’s so much I want to test and try out, especially after seeing and hearing about so many different Peak Experts and how they fought. I even broke the rules a little to spar with Gerel and throw up a Sound Barrier for fun times with Mila, though I refrained from doing anything too overt and flashy besides my inadvertent Aural leakage. Now that there’s no one to keep me company and I’ve been left to my own devices however, I have no idea what to do with all my free time.

Pet some rabbits and make friends with a tiger I suppose. Not the worst use of my time, but certainly not the best.

One thing I’d like to test out is if using too much Heavenly Energy has the same side-effects as using too much Chi, as that would be a great workaround to my limits. Oddly enough however, the Central Citadel is completely and utterly devoid of any and all free-floating Spectres, leaving me with no way to replenish my drained reserves of usable Heavenly Energy. The dearth of angry ghosties is odd considering the staggering number of casualties sustained during four days of nonstop battle, which leads me to believe Zhen Shi has taken steps to limit my abilities as much as possible. As soon as I arrived, he withdrew every last Demon from the battlefront, even carrying away their corpses for no reason except to deny me access to Ichor, so I suppose he summoned the Spectres away in the same manner. The half-Demon Warriors stayed to fight, but during my first exchange with those amalgamated foes, I discovered I could not absorb the Demonic Ichor even after killing the human host. Why? No idea, though my best guess would be that it has something to do with the fact that the hosts are still technically human. With Demons, the Spectres are wholly in control while the host is relegated to prisoner and bystander, leaving me to believe the Ichor is a physical manifestation of the Spectres’ metaphysical existence, the same way my Spiritual Heart is a combination of my physical and metaphysical existence. With half-Demonic Warriors however, their Ichor might somehow be integrated with the host’s physical and metaphysical being as well, and thus protected by the inviolability of their still whole-and-human souls, protection which remains in place even after death.

A lot of this is just guesswork, because I still don’t know enough about souls to do anything more, but it feels right, and I’ve learned to trust my gut. Besides, while it would be nice to know why I can’t Devour Ichor from half-Demonic Warriors so I can maybe devise a workaround to those limitations, it’s not the most pressing issue I have at hand. No, the important thing is that I can no longer afford to sit back and give Zhen Shi the initiative, because as time goes on, his forces only continue to grow in strength. He revealed thousands of half-Demonic Warriors during the siege of the Central Citadel, and who knows how many more he has tucked away, not to mention how more Demons, Defiled, and Chosen are being turned with every passing day. Given enough time, he could muster three armies equal to the one we just defeated, and if he were to send them all at different targets, the outer provinces would stand no chance against them. Right now however, we have a golden opportunity to strike back using our Runic Cannons before our foe can rally more troops and devise countermeasures to deal with these new weapons of war, and I would be a fool to let this chance slip by.

With nothing better to do, I bring the floofs out to see the Citadel and show my face to the crowd, offering condolences and commiserations which mean little to those in mourning. The Ryo and Ishin families are particularly torn up, both having lost their influential patriarchs in the last twenty four hours, and I can tell my sympathies fall on empty ears as their political woes come home to rest. This is all more Luo-Luo’s wheelhouse, but I try to do what I can and publicly offer my support to anyone and everyone who might need it, including Ryo Da’in and Ishin Ken-Shibu who are now the respective heads of their families and wholly out of their depth.

Poor Ken-Shibu is not only mourning the loss of his father, but his younger brother as well, both dying in valiant defence of the Empire and already forgotten by the vast majority while the powers that be pick away at the still-living body of the Ishin family, opportunistic vultures one and all.

The outer provinces will be long in mending from their wounds taken in war, but the sooner we put an end to the threat, the sooner we can start rebuilding. Hence my rush to take the fight to the Enemy, but not with a mere million soldiers as I implied earlier. No, those million soldiers will merely make up my vanguard, the heroes who will spearhead our invasion Western Province and establish a foothold deep within Enemy territory, but there are a number of pressing issues we have to deal with first, one of which is general morale. The mood is dark and dour, but given the lack of Spectres, I can only chalk it up to a difference of outlook, because I have no idea how to explain the general mood of hopelessness and despair following our unexpected and frankly spectacular victory against the Enemy.

As the hours wear on and the gloomy atmosphere persists, I develop a sneaking suspicion that all is not well in the Central Citadel. I’ve seen more than my fair share of grief and bereavement, but this is on a whole other level, even to someone as self-deprecating as myself. Odd to think that the entire Citadel could be in such a foul mood, with few people talking about our victory and everyone focused on our ‘imminent’ defeat, and were it not for the obvious lack of Spectres, I would think this Zhen Shi’s work. In fact, even without them, I’m almost ready to blame our foe for this sorry state of affairs. I’m not sure if he’s actually responsible or how he might be doing it, but I can almost smell his foul influence in the air, a subtle wrongness hiding behind the acrid smoke and scent of charred flesh. It’s possible Zhen Shi has unleashed yet another weapon against us, one I cannot even identify, but soon I am convinced there is some foul magic at work when I notice Rakky’s hackles and Aural defences are still up no matter where we go in the Citadel. A quick query to Pong Pong further proves my theory, as he shares with me an Aura of uneasy discomfort, one that comes across as swimming through an inky, impenetrable sludge that tastes of death and decay.

The little guy is getting really good at sharing his thoughts through Aura, though it still takes a bit of artistic liberty to understand.

As soon as I bring my suspicions to Monk Happy, his brow furrows in palpable uncertainty. Not the reassurance I was hoping to get, but he merely says he will look into it and leaves to do just that. With dinner time fast approaching, I head home with a belly full of worry and back bent with unseen burdens, wondering if I should rethink my plans to take the fight to our foe. Maybe it would be better to stick to tried and true tactics, to gather my strength and wait for the Enemy to come fight on our terms where we hold the advantage. Am I in too much of a rush? What if our offensive fails? Then the outer provinces will be doomed and I will be forever known as the man who lost an Empire. Is that how I want to be remembered? A legacy of folly and defeat? Falling Rain, the man who led the Azure Empire to their ultimate defeat, that is how the history books will remember me.

...

I can’t tell if these are my own doubts, or ones whispered into my ears by Zhen Shi, but as I return home to find Yan and Lin-Lin waiting to greet me, my worries melt away in their warm embrace, for the moment at least. I made my choice, but if the plans put forth by the Colonel Generals are not up to snuff, then there’s no harm in rethinking my position. No man is an island, so I’ll rely on my allies and take things one step at a time, advice Mila would no doubt share with me if she were here at my side. Glancing at the bathroom as if I could see through those walls, I idly wonder how my beloved wife is faring only to notice a powerful convergence of Chi gathering within those closed walls. Still deep in the throes of Insight, Mila channels the Energy of the Heavens on a scale unlike anything she’s ever managed before, and the entire family stops to watch as her presence is made known to their senses. Not one of the five major senses, but to our Spiritual Sense, an intangible impression that emanates from our very souls, one that warns me and everyone else to take shelter mere microseconds before the roof of my borrowed bathroom explodes in a burst of splinters and shards.

A beam of concentrated light shoots up into the heavens themselves, illuminating the dark clouds hanging overhead and piercing through to reveal a small patch of clear skies. Disappearing in the blink of an eye, the radiating pillar leaves behind an afterimage of light, one that is seared into my retinas for the next few seconds as I rush over to check on Mila. Unable to move too quickly due to my inability to see clearly, I arrive long after the Peak Experts and arrive to find my wife staring up at the destruction she has wrought while her parents escort her out of the now unsafe structure, her mouth opened wide in bewildered amazement as if she were not the one who destroyed it.

“What happened? Are you alright?”

At the sound of my voice, Mila’s gaze snaps onto me, her wide eyes filled with excited confusion. “How did you do that?” she whispers, stroking the edge of her shield as she tries to put her thoughts into words. “We were sitting there talking, and then you fell silent, but I could... see your thoughts almost, perceive what you perceived, and then...” Idly gesturing at the roof, she rapidly blinks as she finally comes out of her fugue state and sags into her father’s arms, drained and exhausted like I’ve never seen her before, leaving me to ponder the implications of what she just said.

Did I really share my thoughts with her and teach her how to fire a laser? How? Can I use this to my advantage?

...I sense many migraines and sleepless nights ahead, because I simply cannot wait to test this out.

Chapter Meme