Seeking for Your Forgiveness

Chapter 7. The Meaning Of Snapdragon Flowers

Anna sighed. Kristoff slowly turned his eyes and looked at her. Anna, who was  so frightened that her face became pale, closed her eyes with a disastrous expression.

“If Marianne ran away on her own will, and she doesn’t want to be caught by anyone, she’ll never contact us. It’s because she knew you’d be the first one to come to us. My daughter, Marianne, is…… a clever child.”

“……”

Anna was right. Marianne was more clever than anyone else.

When she entered law school, she knew Fabian acted pompously. He even paid for his colleagues’ drinks that day which was equal to his monthly salary.

Kristoff, who was exposed to the unexpected fact, made a puzzled face. His expressionless mask collapsed, the black eyes showed signs of anxiousness.

The thought that he wouldn’t find Marianne never occurred, even in the midst of his fury. She was always within his expectations, and it was only a matter of time before he got her back.

But what if she doesn’t eventually contact Fabian and Anna? What if she disappears like this?

Fabian stared curiously at Kristoff, who hurriedly rubbed his mouth with his dry hands. The black eyes, which were always full of confidence, shook helplessly.

Kristoff looked anxious, like a child who lost his mother’s hand at the market. He was like a scared child, not having any idea where to go.

Huft, Marianne, what the h*ll have you done?

Fabian put his palm over his eyes. Kristoff’s voice pierced his ears.

It wasn’t about the sharp voice that halted until earlier. It was the voice laced with anxiety and fear. It was hard to believe, but it’s true.

“Then, where should I look for Marianne?”

His voice continued inadequately. Kristoff finally realized that he knew nothing about Marianne.

The place she enjoys going to, people she hangs out with, whether she has any friends to get help. He didn’t know anything.

Kristoff fell into a deep despair as if a survivor floating around in the vast sea and could only rely on a broken piece of wood. Then, he looked at Fabian eagerly. Hoping the man could answer his question.

Fabian, who sighed loudly, lowered his hand that covered his eyes. Kristoff, whose face had disappeared from his vision, met his eyes again. His persistent gaze stared stubbornly at Fabian’s lips.

“How do we know if Lord Schneider doesn’t know either?”

“……”

Fabian sighed once again while watching the trace of anguish slowly sink in Kristoff’s pale face.

Kristoff stood there, his fists were white. He looked sorrowful that he even imagined the ground beneath his feet was falling apart.

Marianne, where the hell are you?

Fabian looked blankly out of the window, forgetting that it was already past work time.

Kristoff, who eventually came to his senses a while later, left the house in a hurry, followed by the sound of a car leaving.

“Honey.”

Anna called him in a weeping voice. Fabian gently hugged the slightly trembling shoulders of his wife.

Anna, who was sobbing quietly, whispered as she buried her face in his arms.

“Where is our poor child? She doesn’t even have anyone to go to for help…… What is our Marianne thinking?”

“I’m not sure.”

Suddenly, he recalled Marianne who protested about Veronica’s death which was concluded as suicide. No one ever listened to her, but Marianne wasn’t convinced.

“Perhaps……”

Fabian couldn’t finish his sentence. Looking up into the air, he closed his eyes gloomily. It suddenly came to his mind that an ordeal doesn’t come by itself.

He recited a silent prayer for his daughter, whose whereabouts he didn’t know.

***

The car ran past the wide open gate. As the engine roared louder, the mansion got even quieter. No one wanted to go against the owner’s mood.

Martin looked at Kristoff’s face, which was as pale as a corpse, and noticed that he hadn’t found Marianne in the Kloze Family’s house. The wrinkled-eyed man released a deep sigh.

After getting out of the car, Kristoff walked while thinking. Martin followed him without saying anything.

Where should he start looking? Did Marianne get along well with Lady Angel?

Kristoff suddenly stopped in his steps and frowned. No, Marianne wouldn’t have asked Lady Angel for help, fearing the risk of social scandals.

She had a strong sense of responsibility. Even after tossing the divorce papers, she wouldn’t do such things to throw the Schneider Family as prey in society.

Then where did she go?

Kristoff headed straight to the office. Martin, who was one step ahead, opened the door for him.

And then.

“……”

The first thing he felt was an unfamiliar scent. The scent of flowers spreading around the room stopped Kristoff.

Then, his gaze slowly moved and headed toward the desk. To be exact, to the bouquet of purple flowers on the desk.

“What’s that?”

Kristoff’s voice was as dark as someone who crawled up from hell. Martin stared alternately between the flower and him bewilderingly.

“Martin, do you think I’m in the mood to admire flowers?”

“……I’ll take care of it.”

Martin had no idea why there were flowers.

Last night, Kristoff, who returned to the mansion, stayed up all night in the parlor, which was unusual. Therefore, he didn’t even know when the flowers were put there.

Kristoff’s eyes shone coldly as he buried himself in the chair. Martin urgently ran out of the room to find the oblivious servant.

After a while, Martin returned to the office and spoke in a more perplexed voice than earlier. There was still something that he couldn’t quite understand.

“According to the maid, Mrs. Schneider left it there.”

“……Marianne?”

Kristoff lifted one of his eyebrows at the unexpected answer. He stared intently at the purple flowers, as if it was Marianne.

Right before she disappeared completely, she left the flowers for him. What’s the reason?

Marianne couldn’t have done it for no reason. There must have been a purpose for this. The problem was that he didn’t know what it was.

Tsk.

Kristoff clicked his tongue and had a frustrated expression. He clicked his tongue again after realizing it had been a very long time since he felt this ambiguous feeling.

It felt as if a big wall was suddenly placed in front of him when he walked through the smooth path, it was as if the world had prepared this for him. No matter how much he stepped up, he couldn’t see what was beyond the wall.

The moment when the light of despair dawned on his shining eyes.

Kristoff, who didn’t take his eyes off the purple flowers for a while, slowly lifted his head. His voice came out rough.

“Martin. What are these flowers called?”

“……I’ll call the gardener.”

Martin was bewildered by the unexpected question, but he skillfully managed his emotion. He left the office again and returned in no time with the gardener.

Peter seemed very nervous upon the sudden call of his master. He dropped his head while rubbing the hat in his hand.

“Peter, what’s the name of the flowers on the desk?”

Martin hurriedly asked on behalf of Kristoff before the man ran out of patience. Peter looked at both of them alternately before walking to the front of the desk.

He replied confidently, as if there was nothing he could be afraid of.

“It’s snapdragon flowers.”

“Snapdragon?”

“Yes, the flower’s resistant to the cold climate, so it’s largely planted for ornamental purposes. Colors not only purple, but there are also red, white, yellow…….”

“Enough.”

“Pardon……? Oh, understood.”

Peter, who was trying to show off his knowledge, paused and shut up. He was worried that the snapdragon flowers on the desk would freeze to death because of Kristoff’s cold tone.

“You may go out.”

Peter nodded again with a relieved expression after hearing what Martin said. Kristoff, who was lost in his thoughts and didn’t even notice the opening and closing of the door, suddenly rose from his seat.

He headed straight to the first floor. He opened the door of the study room, and the room surrounded by bookcases came into sight. Thousands of books were stacked densely in the high bookshelves that seemed to reach all the way up to the ceiling.

He was certain to have seen the book somewhere inside this room.

Kristoff clicked his tongue anxiously and scanned each book. If he were to guess it right, he would find out what message Marianne left for him soon enough.

His irritated gaze moved quickly. However, the book he was looking for was missing. Once again clicking his tongue, he eventually stopped in his place.

“……”

Kristoff, who swallowed through his dry mouth, slowly reached out. One book came to his hand in no time. The book was something he wouldn’t normally look for.

Flower Dictionary.

He’d heard that the ladies gave flowers as gifts and as a way to secretly exchange messages through flower languages.

He couldn’t do anything. How would they use it while keeping their mouth shut? He also remembered making a joke about it, “Do they use it only to gossip about others?”

Mrs. Schneider, who was at the center of society, couldn’t have known that. No, she might also give meaningful flowers as gifts from time to time to others.

A bouquet of flowers as congratulatory celebration for families, a bouquet of flowers as a sign of consolation for families who had a funeral. Sometimes, even a bouquet of flowers that had a meaning of friendship.

He wondered about the message Marianne left to him. What would it be?

Kristoff turned the pages of the book impatiently. Flap flap, the paper fluttered constantly.

Did she leave a hint about her whereabouts? Or is it a desperate request to look for her?

Kristoff’s movement stopped for a moment. He finally found the flower meaning of the snapdragons. The motionless Kristoff swallowed wryly before reading the letter with trembling eyes.

At the same time, his face was wiped of any expression. As if he was caught off guard.

Kristoff carelessly lifted one of his hands to rub his chin. He swept down his chin continuously like someone who was at a loss.

His eyes moved slowly. They remained at the meaning of the snapdragon flowers again.

“Pride.”

That was her last message to Kristoff. It was neither a request to find her nor a hint of her whereabouts. It was only two letters, ‘Pride’.

Kristoff’s eyes, which were filled with hope, lost their light.

***

The cart moved past just under the window. The rattling noise woke her up at dawn. People who had a longer day than anyone else were already busy from the early hours.

She heard the dog barking in the distance. When it barked, all the nearby dogs began to bark as well. Marianne’s morning was a commotion, too.

The mansion where she lived was always quiet. There was no noise that woke her up because the ruckus of the town couldn’t reach her residence.

She stood up leisurely, dressed up with the help of the maids, and chose a dress for the day. After enjoying the meal that was so quiet even the dropping needle would be heard, she saw Kristoff off. That was her morning routine.

“Well, what should I wear?”

Marianne looked into her closet and was facing a dilemma.

There were only five outfits hung in the closet, which was incomparably less than the amount of clothes inside her closet in the mansion.

They were purchased with money she borrowed from Marquis Schneider.