Self Insert as Spider-Man MCU

Bokuboy

Pepper and I shopped for the rest of the afternoon and she bought a lot of things. A lot of things. She had even called her driver to take some of the packages for her when we were several stores into her shopping spree.

As the day wore on, I was more and more amused by her and I was really starting to like her as a person and not just as a target to get back at Tony. The best part was that she never mentioned him by name, so I never had to pretend to be surprised that she knew the billionaire or that he was the one she had been dating.

When it was approaching suppertime, Pepper's cell phone beeped at her. She checked it and sighed.

“I recognize that sigh. It's resignation.” I said and she gave me a sad look. “Hey, don't look like that. This was the best day of my life so far!”

“So far?” Pepper asked.

“I've got a wonderful friend like you in my life now. How can things not get better?”

Pepper looked surprised, so I put her bags and packages down before I took her hand and looked into her eyes.

“I know you're a busy woman and I'm not going to ask when you're free again. Friends don't make demands like that.” I said. “You have my number. Give me a call when you want to have lunch, or to chat, or if you feel like hearing an enthusiastic voice tell you how awesome you are.”

Pepper chuckled. “So, I can call you all the time for that last thing?”

I laughed. “Texting is free on my phone plan, too. You can spam me whenever you want.”

“Oh? What would you do if I did that?” Pepper asked and sent a text to her driver to pick her up.

“Spam you right back, of course. That's what friends do.” I said and then smiled. “My opinion of you hasn't changed, by the way. Even after that gruelling shopping spree and being your willing mule, I still think you're a magnificent woman.”

Pepper had an odd look on her face for a moment, then she leaned down and lightly kissed me. “What about that developing office woman fetish?”

“Firmly planted.” I said and tapped my temple. “You do great work!”

Pepper laughed softly just as the car arrived. I picked up her packages and bags and brought them over to the car's trunk. The driver opened it and I put them in and took out the bag with my clothes in it.

“Despite how it started and ended, I had a great time today.” I joked and Pepper chuckled. “Take care of yourself, Pepper. I mean that.”

Pepper looked thoughtful for a moment and then firmly nodded, which meant she understood that I was referring to her becoming CEO of Stark's company.

“Goodbye, Ben.” Pepper said and climbed into the car's backseat.

“Bye!” I said, then I stood there and I waved as they drove away. She had offered earlier in the day to drive me home and I said that I didn't want to take up her time by driving partway across the city at the busiest time of the day. I did give her my address and cell phone number, just so she didn't think I was hiding it from her.

I made my way to the closest bus stop on a less populated street, just so I wouldn't get caught in too much traffic on the way home, and hopped on the bus when it arrived. I had to make two transfers to get back to my neighbourhood and I walked down the street before I entered my building. I rode the elevator up to my floor and entered the apartment, only to see May was already there and she had some fast food for us.

“How did it go?” May asked me as her eyes roamed over me to see if I was okay.

“I took a bit of a fall, just like I planned.” I said and she looked a little worried. “It's okay, May. Miss Potts was very concerned and bought some supplies from a pharmacy to clean and tend to the scrapes I had.” I said and took out the pharmacy bag from my clothing bag. “She did a great job, too.”

“Were you really hurt?” May asked and came over to me to hug me. Her hands felt the gauze taped to my back in a bunch of spots. “Ben!”

I chuckled. “It's okay, May. It worked like a charm.”

“It... it did?” May asked and looked surprised.

“Yep! We got to talking and we discussed a few things, and I told her that she should be the actual CEO and not just run Stark's company for free.” I said.

“And she accepted that?” May asked, disbelief in her voice.

I chuckled. “I didn't just blurt it out. I steeped it inside a discussion about my business economics classes and one thing led to another. When she was done shopping, I reminded her to take care of herself and she knew what I meant.”

May took a breath and let it out. “I can't believe that actually worked.”

“I'm a little surprised as well.” I said and led her over to the kitchen table. “Hopefully, she'll take my advice and secure her position, get a huge bump in her salary, and then I can bring up Stark stealing my patent. With her in control, I'll either get the patent back or ask to be compensated for its use.”

May nodded as we sat down and started dividing up the food. “You're waiting to see how well it sells.”

“Stark jacked the price up on the individual units and changed the look. Everyone that enters a business with them will know what to shoot first, because the things stand out like sore thumbs on a carpenter.”

May laughed softly. “You know people will buy it, just to say they have it.”

“Unfortunately.” I sighed. “Anything with the Stark name on it seems to be popular and sells well.”

May paused with her fork about to poke an egg roll. “Is it because of Stark or Iron Man?”

I blinked my eyes at her several times as my brain hiccuped, then it restarted and I chuckled, then I laughed, then I leaned across the table to kiss her cheek. “My beautiful aunt has a brilliant mind!”

May blushed a little and laughed as she pushed me away. “You're lucky you didn't start eating yet.”

I grinned at her, dipped my finger into the cherry dipping sauce, and rubbed it over my lips. “My brilliant auntie! Kishes! KISHES!” I said loudly and darted around the table to hug her.

“AHH!” May fake screamed and pretended to fight me off as I pretended to smother her in kisses.

“Mwah! Mwah! Mwah!” I kissed the air by her cheeks and she laughed and laughed.

“Our... food's... getting cold!” May said between laughs.

I laughed as well and sat back down as I made a show of taking a chicken ball and rubbed it over my lips and then I ate the cherry sauce covered nugget. “Ah, delicious.”

May shook her head at me and we started eating the food. “What put you in such a good mood?”

“You!” I said and she blushed again. “Don't be embarrassed. It's true. You just gave me a brilliant way to get back at Stark without actually having to confront him directly.”

“How?” May asked.

“I'll need to do a patent search to see if I can do it first, then I'll need to come up with a way to produce them cheaply and still make a quality product.” I said, remembering the older woman's words from the upscale lingerie shop. If you made quality goods, customers were encouraged to return to get more.

“Produce what?” May asked.

“Action figures!” I said with a grin.

“Wh-what?” May asked and looked confused.

“Children's toys.” I said. “Miniature figures that can be posed and have accessories and everything.”

May's confusion changed to surprise. “You're going to get back at Tony Stark by making toys.”

“Yes!” I exclaimed and then grinned. “Iron Man, The Iron Monger, Whiplash, the Hammer drones, and anything else I can legally get the rights to, because any existing patents are either expired or the person is dead with no beneficiaries.”

“You... that's...”

“Your brilliant idea.” I said and reached across the table to take her hand. “Tony can't patent the Iron Man suit because it'll become available to the general public, and he does not want that to happen.”

“Which means the brand of Iron Man is completely open for you to patent.” May said with wide eyes.

“Yes!” I exclaimed again and then laughed again. “He'll have to pay me royalties every time someone uses the patented name to reference him, or he'll try to buy it from me.”

“He could just take it from you when he checks it.” May said.

“Nope! I'm filing it under toys! He won't even look at the thing if it's not technology! Ha ha!”

May nodded with a smile and we finished eating.

I checked the time and realized I was running out of time. “I've got enough time for a sponge bath and then I need to go to work.”

“A sponge bath?” May asked.

“I can't shower with all the gauze and tape on my back.” I said and stood. “Although, I'll have to risk it when I come home tonight. I can't have concrete dust on my skin or let it get into the scrapes.”

“I'll give you a hand with it when you come back.” May offered.

I really want to make a joke about her helping me in the shower. I don't want to make things awkward between us, though. I thought and smiled. “I appreciate that, May. Thank you.”

“You're my nephew. I need to take good care of you.” May said and waved me away from the table. “I'll clean up here while you do the same in the bathroom.”

“Thanks.” I said, used a napkin to wipe off my mouth to make May smile, and I kissed her cheek.

I grabbed my bag of bought clothes and went up the stairs to the bathroom and stripped off, emptied my pockets of money, and put everything into the hamper under the sink. I would have to wash them in the morning before going to meet Natasha. Letting the stains sit for too long wouldn't be good for them.

That thought had me dig out the bottle of stain remover and I sprayed some on every little dried wet spot on the shirts and pants. I nodded and put the bottle away and filled the sink to give myself a quick sponge bath. I had to be careful that I didn't splash myself too much or dampen the gauze. I was sure I couldn't get an infection, thanks to my enhanced metabolism; but, why take the chance?

I went to my room, naked as the day I was born, and waved at the camera before I dressed for work. I checked my work backpack for the safety gear and added all three of my cell phones and carefully hid adding my two normal web shooters and the mini one behind the cell phones. I would check the phones for missed calls and messages while on the bus, then I chuckled and added an earpiece.

My old mask and set of dark clothing was still in the backpack, so I was all set. I waved to the camera again and went to the bathroom, put the money in my pocket in case I needed it, and went downstairs.

“I'll be back in a few hours, May.” I said and put on my shoes, jacket, and the backpack.

“I'll be pretending to be asleep when you get back.” May said with a laugh.

I laughed too and blew her a kiss before I left the apartment and locked the door. I used the stairs and ran down them quickly, and my mind drifted to the smoking guy. I never did check his apartment here in the building and it had been a while since he had died. I shook my head at the thought and agreed with my past self. It was too dangerous to go there because it was too close to home.

I left the building and walked down the street to get on the bus. As soon as I sat down, I took out my real cell phone and checked it. Two messages were missed. One from Max saying she couldn't wait until next week when I would visit and the other was from Val. She asked for me to come and get her and gave an address. I checked the time and I had only missed it by fifteen minutes.

I sent a text that I was on my way and would be there soon. She didn't respond and I frowned at it, then pulled the stop bell on the roof of the bus. It came to a stop and I hopped out and ran for the nearest alley. Luckily, it was a narrow one and I did my parkour jumps from side to side and was on top of the building in only a couple of seconds.

I put on my dark outer clothing, my skin tight leather gloves, my mask, and the web shooters, then I ran for the side of the building and leapt off. Unlike my normal carefree attitude, I was full of determination. Val never texted me before, so I was sure that she really needed me.

I moved much faster than I usually did and it wasn't until I approached the frat house that I realized I had web swung the entire way and my feet hadn't touched the roofs at all. I also saw a lot of cars and people milling about, drinking, and loud music.

Oh, no. I thought and landed on the roof without a sound. I crouched down and stayed in the shadows as I crawled across the roof and let my spider-sense guide me to a safe window to enter. It was unlocked and I slipped inside. There was a couple of people making out on the bed and they didn't notice me at all.

I took off my mask and slipped out the door and I was glad that there wasn't anyone else in the hallway. I walked to each door and carefully peeked in to try and find her. I didn't get a tingle of danger until I opened the third door.

“Shut the door.” Someone said in a hushed whisper. “Either get in here to join in on the fun or fuck off.”

I was really worried now and my spider-sense was tingling a little more. I slipped into the almost completely dark room and I saw a sight I never wanted to see. An unconscious Val and four guys around her with their dicks out and stroking themselves.

“I'm first.” The guy that had invited me in said and pushed up Val's skirt. “I'm really gonna enjoy this.”

I felt my blood boil in a similar manner as when Stark stole my patent. I didn't fight it this time and put my mask back on. “Sooo am I, motherrrrfffuckerrrr.”

My hand blurred and smashed into the side of his face, shattering his cheek and indenting his temple, and he flopped across the bed to land in a heap on the floor. My left foot moved next and I kicked high as it cracked the neck of the guy on the left. The other two guys were shocked at seeing two deaths in as many seconds, then both my hands reached out and grabbed them by the necks. I gave them a squeeze and two snaps later, they were dead.

I took off my mask and one of my gloves to check Val's pulse. It was erratic and her breathing was laboured. Fuck, fuck, fuck! I thought and looked around the room as I put my glove back on. I went to the closet and opened it, to see it was fairly huge. It also had a large blank ceiling. Of course it would have been too much of a coincidence for it to have an attic access!

The music was pretty loud, so I nodded my head to the beat to time myself, then made my hand into a flat shape, as if to chop something, and darted it up and through the ceiling as the music's beat covered up the sound.

I continued doing that to make a rectangular shape large enough and then pushed it up into the attic. I grabbed the closest body and shoved it up into the attic, then did the same for the other two bodies and stacked them. I picked up the first one I had killed and used his t-shirt to wrap around his face to stop the flow of blood from his nose, then I shoved him up into the attic and rested him on top of the others.

I would have to come back later to handle their disposal, assuming they weren't found before then, then I chuckled and took out my mini web shooter and crawled back down and put the closet ceiling back in place as I webbed up the corners and then carefully filled in around the whole thing. There was no way of getting up there that way.

That reminded me to do the same with the actual attic access and I let my spider-sense guide me as I slipped out of the room and found the pull down tab at the end of the hall. I opened it slightly and shot a webline along the edge and then closed it to seal it shut.

I crept back into the room Val was in and I looked around for anything that was girlish, like a purse or anything, and felt relief when I found it stashed under the edge of the bed with her coat and cell phone. I put the phone into her purse and put her jacket on her. I seriously thought about carrying her down through the house and let them all know what had happened, except that would have everyone looking around and investigating, which would bring attention to the four missing guys.

So, I changed my backpack to hang on my front, added her purse to it, and picked Val up to carry on my back. I had to use a bit of normal webbing on her jacket to stick her to my back, then I used a bit on her wrists and legs to keep them wrapped around me.

I opened the bedroom window and was glad it was big enough for us to fit through. I climbed out and closed it, then climbed up to the roof. I went over to the side where I had approached the house in the first place and waited for my spider-sense to tell me when to go, then I leapt as hard as I could, to compensate for the extra weight I was carrying, and shot a webline to swing away.

I was several streets away before I stopped and realized I had no idea where the closest hospital was. I had been heading for Manhattan General because that was what I knew and Val might not have that long. I took out one of the untraceable cell phones and quickly looked up hospital locations near the frat house's address.

It was only twenty minutes away and I memorized the directions before I put the cell phone away and leapt into the air once more as I swung with all my might. I had to get Val medical treatment and possibly her stomach pumped as soon as possible.