The Stars In Your Eyes

December 28th

Jian Kang Lu really thinks he will catch a cold if he wanders in T university again like yesterday. But tomorrow is the weekend. His kitten doesn't have classes. How could he see his kitten when he doesn't have any class?

Jian Kang Lu hopes today his kitten's rage is already toned down, and at least wants to listen to him first.

While he was wandering in architecture faculty, his alarm reminded him to have his lunch. He walked to the nearest mini market and bought a sandwich again. Nothing wrong with a sandwich. It has carbohydrate and protein from the meat, it also still has some fibers from the lettuce. 

"Jian Ge?"

Jian Kang Lu turned his head, that voice seemed familiar. He saw a girl staring at him with a lot of concern..

Mu Xiaoya was first surprised to see him. She was coming here with her friends to buy some snacks and milk. Luckily Yu Dong was not with her right now. Her friends previously told her that they saw a handsome man linger around this mini market yesterday, and giggling whispering to her that today they saw that handsome man once again eat his sandwich in the corner.

Inside Mu Xiaoya's head at that time was snorted and wanted to brag to her friends that she knew a really handsome man in real life. That's why she almost can't close her mouth when she sees that handsome man they talked about is the same handsome man she wanted to boast.

But why Jian Kang Lu was lingering here, at this time? Her ship!!!! Oh my God, please don't let it sink, please please please!!!

Mu Xiaoya saw Jian Kang Lu's complexion is no better than that stupid lamb. Why these people torture themselves? Why they have to torture her like this too, ah?

"Hello, Xiaoya."

Mu Xiaoya could see Jian Kang Lu's forced smile. She knew it would be very awkward for both of them. Her friends looked at both of them with some weird expression. But Mu Xiaoya's biggest concern is looking at this man silently eating his sandwich in the corner. She sighed.

"Have you had your lunch, Jian Ge? Want me to accompany you?"

Jian Kang Lu honestly doesn't want to eat. But he remembered what Mu Xiaoya did to his kitten, how she could persuade his kitten to accept him. Maybe she could help him this time.

"That's great. Where do you want to have lunch?"

Mu Xiaoya said goodbye to her friends, and brought Jian Kang Lu to the cafe near the mini market. To see this man so silent, and looked miserable, somehow ached Mu Xiaoya's heart too. It's so awkward, and silent. Mu Xiaoya also didn't know what to say.

"Thank you for accompanying me, hope I didn't disturb you."

This man was as polite as he always was. Mu Xiaoya slowly asked, "Have you talked to my senior, Jian Ge?"

Jian Kang Lu helplessly smiled, "I tried. But he was still mad at me, and didn't want to listen to me at all."

'That's why you wander around our faculty like this?' Mu Xiaoya silently thought. She then asked what's bothering her since Christmas day.

"My senior didn't say anything to us at all. But it seems he is truly mad at you. If you don't mind, can you tell me what happened? See if I could bring this matter to him once he cools down."

"I was jealous, and childishly mad at him. Then on Christmas eve I had a dinner party with my colleagues, and I was wasted. I didn't even remember clearly what happened. But maybe TangTang misunderstood something when he saw my colleague bring me home that night."

Mu Xiaoya didn't understand. Is this a really big matter? She thought their relationship was beyond something stupid like this. Why don't they talk? Isn't it stupid just to torture themselves like this?

Jian Kang Lu could see Mu Xiaoya's expression. He can guess what's on her mind. No matter what, this is his fault, not his kitten. He could not let his kitten's friends think anything bad about him. It was all his mistakes after all.

"You need to imagine. Yu Dong was mad at you, he was jealous for no reason. I think that matter alone already sucks, right? None of us likes our partner overly jealous about something that has not happened at all."

Mu Xiaoya nodded her head. She could understand that part, but she wanted to say that Jian Kang Lu was jealous for a reason. She will also be jealous if her lover's friends tried to match her lover with a random girl in front of her eyes. Before she could say anything to defend Jian Kang Lu, he already said other things.

"That's my fault. I know TangTang didn't pay attention to her, and it will only put him in a difficult situation if he needs to say that he has a relationship with me. But even so, I'm still mad at him for no reason. That's first."

The waiter delivered their order, Jian Kang Lu politely smiled at the waiter and said his thanks. Mu Xiaoya sipped her hot lemongrass tea. 

"Then imagine. Yu Dong comes home late at night, smells like alcohol, wasted, and brought back home with his female colleague."

"Did your female colleague bring you home, Jian Ge?"

"Of course not, it was my friend. A male."

Mu Xiaoya really can't think there's something major here. It was common for a colleague of the same gender to bring their wasted comrade back home. In Mu Xiaoya's case, of course she will kill Yu Dong if he is ever brought home wasted by his female colleague.

"The point is, TangTang is someone so gentle. He won't be mad at me like this if it was not something awful. Maybe I said something or did something that night, which made him like this. I tried to explain, and apologise. But he's still mad at me."

"So you wander around here, try to meet my senior?"

"Yes." Jian Kang Lu smiled bitterly.

Mu Xiaoya smiled back at him. She knew it was not her place to pry on their relationship. "I hope my senior will forgive you soon, Jian Ge. I cheer for you. If you need someone to accompany you waiting for him, just call me."

"Thank you, Xiaoya. Please put good words for me if you guys talk about me."

Mu Xiaoya laughed, "I will, Jian Ge. Don't worry. I'm your number one fan!"

They finished their lunch, and Jian Kang Lu returned to waiting for his kitten to finish his class. Waiting in front of his kitten's class building. Now when his kitten blocked him, he could monitor every movement of his kitten all the time. 

Once he saw his kitten walk out from the building, he just smiled, and once again followed his kitten.

"TangTang, i missed you so much…"

After meeting Mu Xiaoya, Jian Kang Lu feels he may just need to beg first instead of trying to explain what happened that night.

"TangTang.. Can we just have dinner together tonight? Please… I really missed spending my time with you.."

"I told you, we're over. Stop it. I have exams coming soon, and you are really bothering me. Will you be satisfied if I fail my exams because of you? Are you happy that way?"

Jian Kang Lu was surprised to hear his kitten's words. He didn't think that way. It seems he is really selfish to disturb his kitten like this. And he forgot, every student will have a breakdown near their final exam. He once liked that too. But he couldn't stop following his kitten until they reached the dorm.

"TangTang, i won't bother you. Good luck on your exam. Please eat your meal regularly, and take care of yourself."

Jian Kang Lu once again waits until the night falls, embracing him with darkness. Once the time shows him it is already midnight. With heavy steps he walked back to his apartment. He used to be very happy every time he came back to his apartment.

A place he called home, because his kitten was there. Warming his apartment with his existence. But now, this place back to the cold desolate place he used only to sleep.

December 29th and 30th.

Jian Kang Lu really wants to laugh. How come he came back here again, like a stalker. Keep checking his kitten's position every few minutes, and linger around his dorm. Hoping maybe he could see a glimpse of his kitten again.

Even he wears gloves, but sitting here for four hours surely was not a wise decision. The cold seeps into his gloves, numbing his fingers until they stiffened and rigid. He stands up and walks away. He took his lunch in the nearest restaurant, drank some vitamins and supplements too. No matter what, he still needs to cherish his own body.

Looking at his kitten's picture again and again. It was the only consolation for him, and a torture in the same time. He just missed his kitten so much. Never in his life did he imagine something like this happening. And it was all his fault.

He already tried so hard to cherish his kitten. But maybe spending this last year blissfully made him forget and did the things he should not. It hurts him more to know that he hurt his kitten too, even though he never meant it.

Until night fell, and snow fell down from the sky covering the stars above, his kitten's position was not changed. He is still inside his dorm. Jian Kang Lu looked at the sky, at those black skies with tiny white flakes falling upon him. He felt like standing in the thinnest ice, awaiting for the gentle touch of the sun. The air bares only the coldness. 

Did his kitten eat regularly? He hoped his kitten didn't get sick. It truly makes him regret all that happened if his kitten was sick at this time. And he also thinks about what his kitten told him yesterday. How if his kitten failed his exam because of this?

Jian Kang Lu hoped his kitten would calm down after the exams and go back to him, making him happy once again. Saved him once again. Filled his frozen world with sparks of warmth once again. 

Loved him, once again.