Longmen Memoirs

"Do you want to meet the real Kazdel? Brother." A smile appeared on his face again. Chen Mo didn't know how to describe the faint smile on his slightly bearded face.

"The real Kazdaele?"

"Well, the real Kazdaele is not like the Kazdaele you have heard or seen before, it is a different Kazdaele." Scout said: "I suggest you start learning Kazdaele language first. You have a great teacher right in front of you.”

"Then it's up to you, Mr. Scout."

"Finish the meal first, and then we can start learning." He pointed to the lunch box in Chen Mo's hand: "Enjoying food should be a very fortunate thing."

Because you are still alive, you can still feel the warmth, feel satisfied, and feel the value of your existence.Chen Mo knows that enjoying food is something to be thankful for, especially in this day and age.

Food and clothing are enough for many people to pay everything, even if the price is high. Some people pursue these two words throughout their lives.

Scout is a very good language teacher. His humorous and witty words can easily arouse people's interest. He knows many languages, including Colombia, Victoria, Letania, even Ursus and Yanguo. He is proficient in them. , these languages ​​​​seem to foreshadow his life. He should have been to many places and done many things, otherwise he should not understand such language and culture. He used to be a Sakaz mercenary, so it is obvious what he will do. Metaphor.

What he said, we can make mistakes, but we can't make the same mistake all our lives. It seems that he is not talking about Chen Mo, but himself, or both. He probably saw his past self, the epitome of himself, in Chen Mo. In fact, Most of us, when we look at people in the same profession as us, see a reflection of ourselves in the other person.

It is impossible for Chen Mo to stay in this camp for the rest of his life, and this camp will not welcome people like me who come from unknown places to visit.

"Your body is recovering quickly, but it's still far from enough to wander around. Return to your hospital bed, otherwise someone will carry you back."

Chen Mo met Ms. Kelsey at the gate of the camp, her voice was still calm and cold.

"I just want to see what's different here."

"Oh, so what did you see?" she asked.

"Many, so many that I find it unbelievable. I never thought that the Sakaz people would be so peaceful. Even though they still looked at me with visible hostility, they did not take action."

"You should be glad it wasn't at night, otherwise you would never have been able to walk this far."

"I walked a long way at night, and I thought I was used to the darkness." Chen Mo replied.

"People always reject darkness. What you think is just an illusion. You have lost your way in the darkness and will not see anything."

"Would Ms. Kelsey be interested in discussing philosophy with me?"

"No interest, I'm telling the truth." Kelsey said indifferently: "I don't know who you are, but you are very dangerous. The body you disguise on your body makes it difficult for you to see who you are, and even more so for others. No need to say it.”

"You mean, I'm a hypocrite?"

"Whether it's hypocritical or not, you know very well in your heart."

"Yes, I understand very well."

"I should remind Scout that you are here because of his negligence. I remember I reminded you not to leave your room."

"But people always have various curiosities." Chen Mo said, trying to find an excuse for himself.

"Curiosity is a manifestation of the desire for knowledge, but the desire for knowledge that should not be known will kill yourself."

"Keep your words in mind, Ms. Kelsey."

Chen Mo said, turned around and walked into the room again.

Countless mercenary groups are prevalent in the land of Kazdaele. The mercenary group has become one of the main ways for Kazdaele to survive. The years of mercenary career and precarious life have made this group of people increasingly crazy and crazy. No one cares whether they can see tomorrow's sunrise.

But people are always unwilling to die when they are alive. The life of a mercenary is like a flower blooming in a barren desert. There should not be flowers in the desert. It has no rain and no soil, and seeds will not germinate if they fall on it.

Chen Mo didn't know how to describe her on the day he saw her.

She came in from the gate of the camp. Even her appearance, just that figure was enough to make people feel a different kind of emotion in their hearts.

Chen Mo felt that she was a little naive, as naive as there should be no flowers in the desert, but he could not deny that her innocence was indeed a scarce thing in this land. They believed that she could bring hope to this land. Even she herself began to waver later.

But many people, like Scout and Elise, cannot deny that she was born in Kazdaele and was originally the most promising person to change this country.

I am like a drop of running water in the crowd. While looking up at the stars in the sky, I can't help but wonder if there is the same brilliant galaxy in the sky. Every moment of the shining stars in the galaxy is like a drop of running water like me.

I am looking forward to it, I can’t help but look forward to it, and I can’t help but get lost in the expectation.

She indeed possesses an unavoidable tenderness and charm that makes Chen Mo unavoidable... maybe it's love, maybe admiration, or maybe nostalgia.

Chen Mo didn't know, but to him, she was a special person.

Gentle and charming, she would occasionally be in a daze, and as calm as she was, she would sometimes become confused and suddenly bump into the wall while walking, or she would open a book and fall asleep with her head down and covering her face.

She seemed to be always so busy, and would only occasionally find time to do some jaw-dropping things.

She has a natural leadership temperament that makes people willing to die for her one after another, but she is not willing to see every soldier lose his life in vain.

She believes that everyone has value and meaning in living, even if they haven't found it yet.

Chen Mo took off the uniform of Black Steel International and lost his weapons. He was like a prisoner but did not enjoy the treatment that a prisoner should have.

"Ah, you are? I remember you."

Ms. Kelsey had explicitly prohibited Chen Mo from leaving the room, and had also prohibited herself from contacting her, but Chen Mo still couldn't help but sneak out of the room when Scout left.

Chen Mo is a patient and a prisoner, but he is a free prisoner.

Chen Mo probably couldn't forget the day he saw her. It might have been an illusion, but he couldn't forget that illusion, nor could he forget the warmth of that hand that made him tremble when it touched his hand that was full of blood and clenched the handle of the knife. palm.

Kelsey was right, Chen Mo was indeed a hypocritical person. She saw through his hypocrisy, but she never thought that one day she would take advantage of this hypocrisy again.

But facing her, the mask Chen Mo tried to put on would be in vain every time.

"Is your injury feeling better? I should have gone to see you earlier."

Her gentle voice was exactly the same as her whole person

Colombian, yes, Colombian, she did remember herself.

What kind of mentality would make a Sakaz say such concerned words to a warmonger like himself, and what kind of feeling would spread in his heart, making him really look like he was ten years ago. The child was too embarrassed to say a word.

Chen Mo wanted to call her by name, but didn't know how to address her.

"Please don't be nervous, I don't mean any harm."

Chen Mo took a deep breath, and the words he wanted to hide seemed to be choked in his throat in front of her, unable to be said.

"I know you saved me."

"You seem to be recovering well. Are you here to find me specifically?" She seemed to see what Chen Mo was thinking.

"What should I call you?"

"Theresia, if you don't mind calling me that, what about you?"

"Snake...Chen Mo."

"Chen Mo? What's a very special name? Is he from Yan country?"

"Dragon Gate."

"I remember, Mr. Chen Mo." She said, and then asked: "So, Mr. Chen Mo, why did you come to see me? If you want to leave here, I will inform Kelsey and no one will make things difficult for you. .”

"You want to let me go?"

"You don't belong here. I have no reason to ask you to stay, right?"

It was said so plainly and so naturally, even though she was a warmonger, even though she had committed evil deeds against her country.

"but……"

Chen Mo wanted to say that everything he had done was just like when he mentioned it to Scout, but he found that he did not have the courage to say this to her, nor did he have the courage to repeat the words he had repeated.

He flinched and was timid, afraid that if he spoke out, she would feel bad about him, but why should he be afraid?

Chen Mo realized that the faint smile on her face was so dazzling, as if it wanted to stimulate his heart and illuminate the deepest darkness in his heart.

Even though...she was a sarkaz, a slender sarkaz.

"Your Highness... Please forgive me for my dereliction of duty, Your Highness." Scout arrived belatedly. The word "Your Highness" made Chen Mo startled. "Your Highness?"

Theresia, the true heir to the throne of Kazdaele, is also one of the parties that started this war.

"Scout, it's you. Are you responsible for taking care of Chen Mo?"

"Your Highness already knows." Scout replied respectfully, but there was no humility in his words, but more of longing and desire, just like a believer before God.

"I hope Chen...he has not offended you. Please forgive him for his rudeness."

"It's okay, Scout, thank you for your hard work."

"My pleasure, Your Highness."

"I have promised this Mr. Chen Mo that he can leave here at any time."

"But... Your Highness, Ms. Kelsey's side..."

"It's okay, I'll tell Lord Kelsey."

"As ordered."

After coming back, Scout complained a lot about Chen Mo's behavior today. As I listened to his complaints, I was thinking about another thing. He was thinking about the name Theresia and the meaning of the word "Your Highness."

"So, Brother Chen went out of his way to meet His Highness today and wants to leave?"

After Scout finished complaining, he finally said this. He is not stupid. It is better to say that there are very few real fools in this world.

"Will Ms. Kelsey be willing to let me go?"

Scout will be placed next to Chen Mo. On the one hand, it is to take care of him. On the other hand, it is also a disguised form of surveillance and house arrest.

"Brother, you were originally an operator of Black Steel." Scout seemed to finally recall Chen Mo's identity: "But do you know that your behavior today is very dangerous, and you will probably be killed on the spot. Thank you No one was with His Highness at the time.”

"Don't your Highnesses have someone around to protect her?"

"Protection, little brother, do you think the lion needs a rabbit to protect it? Ms. Kelsey once tried to do this, but Her Highness said that there is no need to arrange people to protect her safety. She hopes to send people to protect her where they are more needed. Their place, even if it can only save one more soldier's life, soldiers should not be tied to unnecessary positions."

"Her Highness Theresia seems to be very important in your eyes?" Chen Mo asked.

"Is it important?" Scout smiled softly, and his eyes turned to look at the weapon he placed next to the chair: "It's not just important, Brother Chen, you probably don't understand that feeling. Originally, for me, a dream It is an unreachable thing. We Sakaz people have lived in chaos and death all our lives. Just because we are Sakaz, we are hard-hearted? So we are worse than pigs and dogs?"

He clenched his fingers.

"But we are very fragile. Our tears will flow into the sand and the seeds will not germinate." He raised his head, and Chen Mo saw his eyes, which were shining with some inexplicable light:

"But His Highness said that he didn't want the residents of this land to cry just for parting and loss. She didn't want our night sky to be filled with heartbreak and emptiness. She wanted others to no longer think only of cruelty and cold-bloodedness when they mentioned Sakaz. She thought that every Sakaz child could grow up carefree in the arms of mother and father. We should not be born cold and ruthless, just because we are also human beings, we also suffer, and we also have belongings. Our homes are home to the people we love and the things we want to protect.”

"Her Highness said that she wants to end this war and end Sakaz's destiny that has been set for hundreds of years. Sakaz's future should not be barren."

After he finished speaking, he lowered his head slightly.

"I don't know how far away the future His Highness is talking about, but I seem to be able to see hope. You know, hope is not a beautiful word in Kazdaele. Hope is not popular in Kazdaele. We only want us." Things that can be seen and touched, food, money, bonfires...wars, fighting, blood, rather than illusory things like hope." He said: "But we need it, and we only discover it when we really see it. We really need him, Kazdaele needs hope, and His Highness needs to lead us.”

"This road is very difficult, it may be extremely difficult, or I may not be able to wait until the day I see him, but it doesn't matter. Brother Chen, you said you grew up in Longmen and came from Colombia, then you must have seen Longmen and I have also seen the world of Colombia. I am envious of the prosperity and stability, and I am so envious that I hope that one day our Kazdaele can become a place like them."

"Every child has a book to read, every family has plenty of food for dinner, a bonfire, and new clothes. Men don't have to take up arms and become mercenaries to work for others in order to survive, and women don't have to be frightened while waiting for a fortune. It’s not a generous pension.”

"I didn't even have the courage to think of this before." Scout's voice was much lower: "But His Highness allowed me to see all this and let me see the future of Kazdaele, so I followed Your Highness, and I am willing to use my I have spent my whole life in exchange for the future of Kazdale, for an illusory future. I think it is worth it. I didn’t do this before because I couldn’t see it, but now that I have seen it, I have to do it. I will. Take up my arms and give everything I can for this country and for Your Highness.”

But Chen Mo couldn't deny what he said. Even though Longmen and Colombia were not as beautiful as Scout thought, he only saw part of them, but most of us can only see part of them. It's not that we can't see it. It’s that we don’t want to see it.

Kazdale's mercenaries have spent their lives on the battlefield, hiding among the rising smoke among the ruins of collapsed buildings. Their lives are worthless. The value of their existence is just candies on a list. The more valuable the mercenaries are, the more valuable they are. The stronger the soldier, the more worthy of death the stronger mercenary is. The more damnable the mercenary is, the stronger and more valuable he will be if he cannot die. The value of their lives seems to be for the money that their heads can represent.

Until Theresa appeared.

It gave them a different direction, recognized them, and showed them a different future. They may have fantasized about it, an unattainable fantasy, but now, someone has placed the fantasy in front of them.

The fire-chasing moth will surely die.

"You are a hero, Scout." Chen Mo said.

"I'm not a hero. The word hero should be reserved for greater people. Brother Chen Mo, I'm just an ordinary Sakaz man. I just want to be an ordinary Sakaz man." He said, smiling. , the smile slowly disappeared from the corner of his mouth: "But I took up arms and killed others because I wanted to live, simply live, but living is a very difficult thing. I have made many mistakes, I will not run away, I will atone, and if I can, I want to pay for these sins of mine."

"I'm sorry for saying so many strange things to you." Scout took a deep breath and said, "Maybe it's been too long since I've met someone who talks like this, so I have a lot to say."

Scout said:

"His Highness has agreed for you to leave. Ms. Kelsey may object, but Ms. Kelsey will not make things difficult for His Highness. When is Brother Chen going to leave? Your weapons and equipment are now with me. , if you want to leave as soon as possible, I will bring you here. The nearest city is not far from here, and we will be responsible for sending you there."

"Scout, I want to stay."

"You want to stay?"

"I want to see the kind of future you mentioned." Chen Mo said, "I haven't seen it, I want to see it."

"You want to join us? But you... you are not a Sarkaz."

"Ms. Kelsey is not a Sakaz." Chen Mo replied: "I have no intention of joining you for the time being. As you said, I am not a Sakaz."