All the scenery in the dream changed suddenly and lost its color.Darkness chased my body, and the colorful clouds and sky shattered and fell one by one, like cracked biscuits.After hitting the ground, it shattered into puddles of sludge. After my feet were entangled in the sludge, I was completely shrouded in darkness, crushed and swallowed...
When I woke up again, the pain became a thousand times worse!pain!It hurts like ten thousand ants devouring the heart and ten thousand spiders devouring the flesh!
The will to resist was crushed before it even rose up. I trembled violently, thinking repeatedly in my heart: I can't do it, I'm so uncomfortable, I can't, I can't bear it, I can't, I want to give up.
No one can resist not giving up... this pain...!
Under the severe pain, I lost the irritability, depression, and anxiety.I was surprisingly calm, really, the more it hurts, the calmer I became.But I have only one purpose left:
I want "that".
Do whatever it takes, throw everything away.
The darkness that gnaws at oneself suddenly becomes strength.Support the body to endure the pain, turn over and get out of bed.His body was trembling slightly, but it didn't matter.
I reach for the dresser.There are care products and cosmetics that Gu Jiaming prepared for me.I have never eaten pork, but I have seen a little bit of pig running.Therefore, smoothing out simple foundation, applying simple lipstick and blush, and covering up the pale complexion went smoothly.
In the mirror, she seemed to be a normal and beautiful Hu Meier.
No one can see, those "thorns" made of shadows...black...invisible...shadows drilled into the flesh.
I changed back to the skirt and black silk in the bedroom, and deliberately took off my underwear.The light in the study is still on, Gu Jiaming has been with me all day, and there must be endless work to do at night.After confirming in front of the mirror that the current smile is soft and seductive enough, I went to get my own cup, made him a cup of coffee, and brought it to the door of the study,
"Bang, bang, bang."
"Come in," he said.
I pushed the door open, pretending to be a little shy on purpose.
"What's wrong?" Gu Jiaming's eyes stayed on my lap for half a second, then fell to a high place, his eyes showed doubts.I pretended to be at a loss and blushed, "Here, I'll bring you a cup of coffee."
"Don't sleep?" He smiled softly, got up and walked over, took the cup, and led me over by the way.There is also a simple small leather chair beside the desk. I suspect that this chair was originally placed for a woman to watch him work at his desk.
In the past, I might gossip.
but.
busy now.
"Xin, thank you for your hard work, Jia, Jiaming, you have accommodated me so much during the day, causing things to pile up until night. I'm a little, a little bit sorry. So, so..." He lowered his head pretending to be shy. Can you smell it?After a little calculation of the distance, I found that the effect was not the best, so I quietly moved in by one centimeter.
"Is it really because of regret?"
Gu Jiaming picked up the coffee I gave him, looked at it carefully, and then took a small sip.
This warning is within my expectations.
Rather, he doesn't have this vigilance, so I want to look down on him instead.
"..."
I deliberately did not answer.
"A seizure? You're shaking."
he asked solemnly.
"Actually...it's not that, it's, it's, it's..."
This sentence is a lie. The reason for trembling is pain and discomfort.But the slightly controlled tremors that change the frequency can also be interpreted as...another more beautiful spring color.
"What is it?"
He was curious.
"I, I had a dream."
Gently raised her head to look at him, pretending to be courageous but shy, she couldn't blush, but the blush was enough.Squeezing out half a line of tears, I covered my face in a flustered and pitiful tone, wanting to cry:
"Gu Jiaming..."
"I, I might like you..."
"What should I do...uh...?"
Text Chapter 130 Six
Everything turned out as I expected.
After Gu Jiaming's eyes flickered twice like lights, he felt a little relaxed, and his smile gradually became stronger.The more I pretended to panic, the happier he was.
All is planned.
"Gu Jiaming, really, you are too good for me, I don't want to do this, you can't do this," teary-eyed pretending to confided, but in fact his eyes confirmed the location of his phone, "Jiaming~ we~ can't get along anymore , I can't go on like this, I, I~~" She urged her to part her brows and eyes with affection, I was really surprised that it was so easy for me to pretend, was it because I had this side to him?
This posture of wanting to refuse and responding is about to collapse, waiting for his heart to move, waiting for him to take the initiative to attack.Because at this time, only if he takes the initiative, he will not doubt... I can't wait, but the more I can't wait, the more patience I need.
Even the pain stimulated the body to be excited wave after wave.The ants that drill into the bones, the dark thorns that penetrate every cell.The more you wait, the more painful you will be, the more excited you will be and the calmer you will be.
"What the hell are you dreaming about?" he asked me.
Turning his head, "Can, can you not say it?" He threw out a thought-provoking answer.Timely matching dodge "shy" eyes - although they are all fakes.
I really don't want to repeat that "dream" very much.
Such a hint is bold enough, although the details are vague, but he made up the process by himself.This is a common problem of smart people.Said one, said nine, from one to one hundred he has "thought".
"Qiu Yun, you've become so abnormal tonight." Covering my cheeks with warm and big hands, Gu Jiaming held my face carefully for a while, but in the end he didn't kiss me, just rubbed my earlobe twice.
"You, let go~!" I pretended to be ashamed and indignant, retreated, shrunk on the stool, and turned my head, "What is abnormal... You, you don't like it, forget it."
"I like it. But what about your brother?"
"I don't know. It's all your fault. You are too kind to me. Think about it."
"Come back and be honest with him."
"Then he will definitely kill me... and he will also want to kill you..."
"But this is the choice that will hurt him the least." Gu Jiaming said very seriously, "If he has any grievances... I will bear it for you, and I will help you make up for it. I can make up for the benefits he can't imagine."
"He doesn't want money."
"It's okay, I know what he wants."
What exactly does Mu Qiuyun want?I thought for a few seconds and couldn't think of an answer.The only thing I know: he wants me.But Gu Jiaming will definitely not compensate "I" to "Him".
Of course...that day will never come.
Because at this moment, everything I say and do is false, except for some kind of eager eyes, and the increasingly hoarse and restless longing in my heart.
I stared straight at him.
Use the most affectionate and at the same time carefully restrain the eager eyes.
But the bottom of my heart was barren and dark.
Then he really came close, pulled me into his arms, and hugged me tightly.I thought I would be sad because I lost the bottom line, but when I dig my heart and soul, there is only the secret joy and excitement of "planning".The body is trembling slightly, trembling slightly for being about to succeed, about to be able to proceed to the next step, to get "that"...
Like a robot on the verge of being scrapped, shake off the rusty parts.
I'm done.
Useless?Junkie?Garbage (le) garbage (se)?
It doesn't matter.
Just don't hurt anymore, don't hurt anymore, save me. . .
……
The process of bringing down Gu Jiaming was extremely smooth, so smooth that I wondered whether God deliberately favored me... = or abandoned me.
Once asked for a kiss, once asked for a drink, and then became a "seizure" when they were drinking, and secretly sprinkled a ground sleeping pill into his glass while he was looking for a suppressant.
After drinking and coaxing a couple of love words, he really fell asleep with his arms around me, and whispered in his sleep, which is so ridiculous~ After confirming that he was asleep, I took out his mobile phone and unlocked it with fingerprints-thank God for this new technology.Then I used Alipay to pay by swiping my face to transfer some money to myself-thank God for Alipay's new technology.
I remember that the door can be remotely controlled with a mobile phone, and I found the private mode, which really hides this software.With a light touch, there were electronic and mechanical sounds from the door... a little relieved.
fortunately.
So far so good.
Carefully broke free from his arms, tiptoed, changed his clothes, and walked to the door.The moment I touched the doorknob, it seemed that "that" was right outside the door, I gently pulled... I was stunned.
The door is locked again.
Footsteps sounded from behind, and Gu Jiaming came out of the bedroom, holding his mobile phone, and was adjusting to that software.He looked at me expressionlessly, and I also looked at him stupidly, but quickly calmed down,
"When did you find out?" I trembled slightly.
"At first," he said.
"Am I acting badly?" I asked him.
He is serious: "The acting is actually great. If I saw you for the first time, I would have believed it. It's a pity...your expressions on me are exactly the same as Zhili in the past. I have seen too many, so I know the essence."
It turned out that I was playing the hypocrisy of "Mu Zhili" without knowing it... This truth made me laugh, but at this time, I couldn't laugh at all.
This road is dead, I will no longer hide the pain, shake like chaff, pretend to be pitiful and beg him:
"Gu Jiaming...I'm in so much pain...Can you help me...Don't you like me...You control me with medicine...I'll be your...wife...sister...you can do it...or I don't get a title...you can do whatever you want... Gu Jiaming...this is your chance...please...please..."
He came over and hugged me with his warm chest.
"I don't want anything," he said softly, "I just want you to be well." "Qiuyun, good girl, be strong. Think about the future, think about your brother, think about the university, friends, and new games you are looking forward to. "
Breaking down and crying: "No, Gu Jiaming, I'm in pain, my whole body hurts, like an ant drilling, I can't figure it out, please help me, please help me. Just give me one injection and it will be fine. Needle, last stitch, please."
"I'll hurt with you." Gu Jiaming put his wrist in front of my mouth.I was stunned, then bit down bitterly.
The scalding blood poured into the mouth, and the fishy and hot smell actually surged up from the stomach, dispelling a very small part of the pain.I was inexplicably pleased with his distorted expression of pain, not to mention, I felt much better with someone who was hurting with me, and it wasn't so unbearable—even a little bit like laughing.
Stupid man...why bother...?
Whispering warmly and coldly.
This episode lasted for quite a long time, almost a day and a night, under a very calm psychological state and extremely bad extreme pain, I played tricks, cheated and seduced, used all the tricks I could think of, abandoned my morals, Abandoning the bottom line and morality, even abandoning humanity... I have tried poisoning.
For the first time, I knew that I was so smart, and my brain could turn so flexible and so fast.It's a pity that Gu Jiaming cracked the tricks one by one... and then the pain slowly subsided like a tide the next night.I was on the verge of collapse, crying for a long, long time, retching for a long, long time, recovering and feeling disgusting from body to soul.
I actually... took the initiative to seduce Gu Jiaming...for that kind of thing...
Still in the status of a married man...
When the tide receded, I went to wash my face, looked at my inhuman appearance in the mirror, gave myself a slap in the face, and scolded: Mu Zhili, the fucking shit, give me a f*cking boost...!
When I went out, Gu Jiaming was waiting outside the door with dark circles under his eyes. He patted my head and asked me gently: "Is it much better?"
"Ah."
"I will forget what happened yesterday, so don't think too much about it."
"Thank you, thank you..."
I was so ashamed that I didn't dare to look up, and I had no face to face this kind of tenderness that was almost inclusive.Gu Jiaming will not be angry with me, he will only tolerate me, take care of me, and hold me on the right path.
He wanted to continue comforting.I'm not sure, so distressed to let him go to sleep quickly.He vaguely agreed, but when he went into the study, I eavesdropped, and it was clearly still working.
Only then did he realize how busy this period of time was for him.But I was so self-willed, causing him a trouble heavier than a mountain and deeper than an ocean.
Dog X's.
Gu Jiaming, I remember.
In the future... I will definitely pay you back... Absolutely, absolutely...
I made up my mind.
That wave that day seemed to be the heaviest wave. Anyway, after that time, I fell into addiction several times, which was relatively light, so light that I could resist it by gritting my teeth.
It's probably because I've grown up.
Only through pain can we learn the lesson, and only through endurance can we temper our will.Many changes, at this point, traces were carved with a knife.The only thing I don't know whether I'm happy or worried is that the tacit understanding with Gu Jiaming is getting deeper and deeper.
One day he suddenly asked me what was my relationship with a surname An?I'm in a cold sweat, damn old Ann is here to find me...!Quickly ask Gu Jiaming to arrange a meeting.
Lao An recovered as before, and he was like a normal person in just a few days, and he was extremely healthy after changing clothes.Stepping on the horse, I fully understand that this calf must be abnormal.After explaining to each other for a long time, he just said in general that he is not the same as normal people, his identity is not ordinary, and others are vague; I also said that there are some important things here, and Gu Jiaming must help here, otherwise there will be big problems , others, also vague.
Lao An finally looked at my little eyes, hissing, complicated and melancholy, I quickly explained to him: "Hey, don't get me wrong, I will never let my brother down..."
He looked much better, but still rather worried.
Sending away Lao An, I continued to live in Gu Jiaming's house, and under his help and guidance, I honed my will and cultivated my sentiments little by little.I started exercising and asked him to teach flower arranging and embroidery... It's true that a big man can embroider. According to him, he learned it to deceive little girls. He has a very high level within half a month of learning.
He is also slightly proud that he has always been strong in learning and mathematics. Although he has never been to college, he can understand the content of advanced mathematics after one pass, and he never uses auxiliary tools for calculations.
I pondered: Isn't this riding horse the same as mine?
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