Villainess Of Hearts

The clock struck midnight when the Queen and her Knight arrived in her chambers. And the long hours already passed them by as the night of festivities drew to its close. Rosalyn Lockhart's conversation with Dimitri Nordskov was already long over as she asked for him—and only him to lead her back to her room. Her sole protector. Julius Ginellevé escorted her back. However, he could only watch the reluctance on her face as her fingers reached for the handle of the door but never made a move to push it open.

It made his heart wince—the fear in her heart was brought on by his failure.

He had let her down, and she had almost died through a single assassin's attack when he could have gone to her side at once. He shouldn't have listened to the Joker. No, he shouldn't have gotten caught up in their words at all. Who he was? It didn't matter to him at all. His only priority now was to be by her side and make sure that she lived a happy and peaceful life.

And yet this incident was showing him his failures, didn't it?

All it took was a single moment or a single word, and she could have been gone in a heartbeat. And it would all be his fault. No one else but his. Did he even deserve to stay at her side? The answer was a resounding no, and yet even if he didn't meet the standards—he wished to be the one with her. He wanted to be the one by her side. Julius mustered up the strength and courage to finally speak up, "Rosalyn." And his voice trembled here right now than with anyone he'd encounter before.

There was no one around them in this corridor tonight. No one to disturb them or say that anything was wrong. There was no judgment here, no cold eyes, or a vindictive tone that told him that he didn't belong. That he wasn't worthy.

She didn't chastise him. Rosalyn instead looked back at him with a slightly pensive look in her eyes, "What is it, Gine?"

Her tone held a hint of weariness in it...

It only made him wonder if she had grown tired of him. Was she sick of him now? Had he not done enough? What was he supposed to do? Julius Ginellevé had barely gotten himself changed back into his armor during the banquet—-he didn't want to leave her side. His heart panged at the thought of leaving her alone at that time. He wished to be with her. And yet, he wasn't important enough to attend it with her. He was simply a Knight. But their differing status never hindered him and even her before.

But he could feel it.

The distance growing in between them continued to grow each day.

Would he be able to touch her heart? He reached out to her tentatively and slowly. His fingers lightly brushing at her cheek as he awaited her response. She didn't flinch away as his hand finally caressed her cheek. This hand of his that had failed her—and yet it was only meant to protect her. Something stung his eyes, "No one matters but you."

Her eyes widened at his words.

Instead of her red lips curling into a knowing and coy smile, she was taken aback by it. And perhaps this was his strongest way of ascertaining that she had indeed changed. He didn't understand it. He hated it. This bittersweet feeling that pricked his chest and set his heart ablaze. The ache in his heart cut deeper. Even their time together in the office hours before the banquet, it solidified it—the moment that she had broken down in her office and...

'I hope you keep your word this time, Gine.' She had said it with the saddest look in her eyes.

He couldn't help but understand that her lament and grief was caused by his own doing. And yet, he didn't know. What exactly was it? Had it been because he was an insatiable man? Did he demand too much from her? Was being with him similar to making her stand precariously tip-toed over glass slippers? Did it trouble her too much? Was his love for her too much for her? Was she terribly burdened by it now?

Julius Ginellevé didn't know at all.

And yet, he knew it was his fault. Those tears, the tear-stained face that she had made at that time as she sobbed quietly into his chest. Rosalyn had tried so hard not to wake the damn cat with her tears and pretend she was alright. She had clung to him at that time, and yet, the cause of the pain had been no one else but him.

Even now it hurt.

"I'm sorry, I don't know what I've done to make you suffer—please tell it to me, and I'll make it better." He broke for a moment and smiled. "I can't stand this bitterness in my heart when you turn me away." Their relationship was changing when all he wanted to hear were the words 'I love you' from her lips again. Back in times when she had said it from the bottom of her heart.

But she gave him another look instead.

A conflict of emotions and her lips pressed together, uncertain and hesitant.

And then the Queen of Hearts averted her gaze slightly from him, but she didn't pull away from his touch. Until she reached out to his hand that held her face, and she spoke to him as she had always done before. The same tone she used when she rebuked him when they were younger, but it held no irritation and only the fondness, patience, and care.

It made his heart sway with nostalgia and melancholy.

She squeezed his hand reassuringly and finally looked back at him. "You... you've done nothing, Gine. Here? Right now? Nothing. Nothing at all." She smiled lightly and shook her head. "Perish the thought. You have done nothing wrong, and you've always been at my side, haven't you, Gine? There's no one else that I know that treasures me in the same way that you do, and I'm gratified for it. Between the two of us, you've always done your best, and I took you for granted."

Then why was...?

She gently pried his hand from her face and took a steady breath. Her ruby red eyes flamed right now, a fire that struck his soul as her tone hardened. "The problem doesn't lie with you. It only concerns me, and so please stop beating yourself over this." There was a tone of hers that told him that this was final and that no argument could be made against it—what she had said was right, and she would stand for it.

"But—"

Another sigh escaped her lips, and she turned away from him, stepping closer to her door. "Good night, Gine. If you wish to guard me tonight? Then do so, I would appreciate it, but I'll be retiring now as it's going to be another long day tomorrow." And yet, she didn't open the door to her chambers just yet.

A flicker of hesitation crossed her face. Her breath was slightly shaky, and her hands trembled as she reached out to the door—

Julius grabbed her hand and pulled her towards him, "Rosalyn, you're the only one that matters to me. Even if it doesn't concern me, please use me. Make me your shield, your executioner, or your knight. I don't care at all. Make me into anything you want, and I'll fit the role—please don't abandon me. I love you." And his words were the truth. He said it as honestly as he could and wished that she would look at him.

She lowered her gaze from his and chewed on her bottom lip.

And he couldn't tell what was in her heart right now.

It drove him desperate.

He swallowed the lurch stuck in his throat. A minute soon passed and then another. Every second that flitted and flowed in between them felt like forever as she seemed to ponder, think, or hesitate. His heart raced faster. The coldness of the night was upon them despite them being in the inmost of the castle, and it made goosebumps crawl over his skin. He momentarily looked up from her lowered head and to their surroundings, to the place where a chandelier once held to the old frame and painting on the wall that contained something from a distant memory.

His head spun for a moment, his surroundings blurred until he heard her voice.

"Gine."

His breathing returned to normal as his heart calmed down. The burden on his shoulders lightened up at just the sound of her voice and especially when he saw her face. She finally looked up at him with a softened and wistful gaze. She let out a resigned sigh and raised the wrist that he was holding on to, the hand that he had latched on to desperately. "Gine, Gine. I honestly don't know what I'm going to do with you, Gine." There was a smile in the sound of her voice.

Rosalyn closed the distance between them and slipped herself into his arms. She buried her face in the crook of his neck, and her body relaxed into him as she leaned towards him. "You make it so hard to leave you." Her voice was soft, and her breath tickled his ear.

But she didn't say 'I love you' back.

"...Your armor is terribly cold, though.. It's a little freezing to keep hugging you."