When We Were Perfect

Despite everything going around and all the stress, Ozan's toothless grin provided him with a warmth he always wanted to embrace.

"I love you, my son," he whispered running his hand through his fuzzy black hairs that he inherited from his mother. A strong emotion hugged him, he wanted him to be surrounded by all the love and affection he could provide so he wouldn't miss his mother's love but truth to be told he may never be able to equalize that.

"Your mother loves you too son but she doesn't know how to show it. Believe me, she will soon come around to us!" Daniel mumbled lowly with a dejected look anticipating that she wasn't going to be that much cruel and one day she would surely come to ozan realizing her mistake. He just hoped that she did that soon.

........

Daniel laid awake on his bed staring blankly at the greyish walls of his room, his body was aching due to exhaustion yet he couldn't sleep, tossing and turning in hopes of getting a small nap for an hour but it was like his mind refused to shut down. A shrill sound made him frown as he turned to the nightstand where his phone was flashing with an incoming call. Surprised that who would call him at this hour, he hoisted himself from the bed despite his body's protest but his surprise turned into concern as he saw Saim's name flashing on the screen.

"Saim! Is everything alright?" He blurted out picking up the call.

"Sorry to disturb you sir but Madam hasn't left her office yet and when I went to check on her, she was passed out on the couch. Should I bring her home?" Saim informed worry lines appeared on Daniel's face as he sighed. It wasn't the first time she slept in her office, it happened twice before and every time Daniel had to bring her back home.

"No need Saim, I am on my way!" He responded before ending the call. He climbed down the flight of stairs and walked towards the staff quarters, gently knocking on Martha's door feeling slightly bad for waking up here this late. A few minutes later Martha opened the door rubbing her eyes and straightening her night suit.

"Master!do you need anything?" She asked perplexed.

"I am sorry to ruin your sleep Martha but I need to go somewhere urgent for a while meanwhile can you stay close to Ozan till I return." He said standing outside her room.

"No problem master, I will look after him!" The middle-aged woman gently responded closing her door and following Daniel. When he was satisfied that Ozan was in the care of Martha, he rushed to his car and sped towards Amy's workplace. It wasn't long before he reached there rubbing his cold hands as the cold breeze flew through his hair, at other times he would stop and enjoy the feel of it but he had an important thing to do before. He entered her workplace, the whole building was quiet and dimly light that would creep someone out at this time but Daniel Saritas had endured more things in his life to not to be frightened of such things anymore. Hovering his hand above the doorknob, Daniel swiftly stepped inside her office, the lights were more bright here than outside, files were all scattered on the desk, her coat lying on the chair in front of her desk, empty coffee cups some on the table and some on floor. All in all her office was a mess completely opposite to the clean and sophisticated one she once had and liked. Glancing towards the left side Daniel saw her passed out on the couch, her head on the side and legs half dangling on the floor, her soft snores indicated that she was in a deep slumber. At the moment it looked like the room of a teenager who passed out after having a pyjama party with her friends. 

Daniel sauntered towards the couch and observed her closely, his eyes wandering over her gorgeous figure, raking every feature of her, her soft and pale skin that looked alluring to him even in the dim light. Her dress was slightly ridden up to her thighs due to her laying position exposing her flawless skin. Signing Daniel pulled it down knowing she wouldn't reciprocate her feelings ever, he couldn't help but stare at her as his figure bent slightly removing the few strands of hairs that escaped her loose bun, roaming her face. He was enchanted by her that he couldn't help himself, her hazel eyes captivated him whenever he looked into them. He remembered those warm and radiant smiles of her that once covered her face, that warm embrace of her around him. How much he wanted to relive those moments and hold them, never getting away from them. Moments he would do anything to relive, they hit him hard every time. At that time when everyone celebrated love, melody and happiness his heart was surrounded by poverty, torment and despair. It was her who showed him a part of things he never experienced. How can he forget that she was his strength once, he was the very reason he started smiling but how ironic it was that same person who taught you how to smile snatched it away from you leaving you wondering that whatever occurred before was whether an illusion or reality.

Seeing her uncomfortable position, Daniel went towards her desk grabbing her purse and phone before scooping her up in his arms, walking towards his car. He nodded at Saim who was in his black car nearby and settled her gently in the front seat and buckled her, she was truly a heavy sleeper. Sliding in the car, he started the engine before turning the radio off not to disturb Amy. Sighing he drove towards their house.

Reaching home, he again carried her in his arms while walking to her bedroom and placed her on the bed. Removing her heels and earrings that might trouble her during her sleep, he gently tucked her in the blanket placing a small kiss on her temple before turning towards the door.

"Si-las, please don't leave me!" Amy mumbled in her sleep shifting into a more comfortable position. There was a sudden rush of breath that escaped his lips when he realized what she said, switching off the lights of her room, he walked outside towards Ozan's nursery, a strong gloomy feeling swirling in his heart.

Martha was still there sitting on the rocking chair, eyes dropping because of lack of sleep.

"Martha you can go and sleep, I am here now," Daniel muttered in a low voice.

"It's okay Master if you want to rest I can take care of him!" She offered despite her half sleepy self.

"No thank you, Martha, go and have some rest. I want to stay here," Daniel responded peeking in Ozan's crib and placing a soft kiss on his cheek. Martha smiled before disappearing to her quarters. Daniel gently rubbed ozan's small and fragile hand, a small smile on his face yet the emotions that flash through his eyes were entirely opposite as he felt an ache in his chest. He slumped on the rocking chair previously occupied by Martha, leaning his head back on the cushion of the chair.

"You know Ozan what hurts the most?" He mumbled staring in space.

"That she will never look at me, the way I look at her!" He breathed trying not to act weak again but still the words came out of his mouth in a flow. He was tired of holding everything in his heart, he wanted someone to hear him, understand him. But no one was there around him.

"She will never love me the way I do," he started again, this time his words laced with sadness, although he knew that ozan was asleep and will never understand what he was saying yet he wanted to pour out his feelings.

"You know her behaviour hurts me most of the time but I still cannot fathom the fact that she holds my heart, my happiness in her hands, I am helpless in front of her. My happiness, my joy and everything I feel are attached to her," Daniel breathed looking at his son who was still sleeping soundly, trying to ease the ache that was swelling in his chest.

"Thanks for coming into my life my son, otherwise this ache and hurt would have consumed me," He smiled sadly gazing at Ozan before closing his eyes to a world of his demons.

How ironic if his inner demons weren't enough now he had to deal with the ones lurking outside.

But isn't it true we all have our demons to fight with, they reside inside our heads ready to eat away every possible chance of happiness. They don't die easily no matter how much you try to get them buried they resurface once in a while.