WTF I Am In The Marvel Universe!

Ray had woken up on a bed in the Shield helicarrier and he saw that the bed next to him had Clint Barton aka Hawkeye in it. Ray wondered what had happened when he had lost his consciousness. Ray wondered if Oswald was still alive, after all if everything had happened like in the Marvel Avengers movie then Loki should have escaped and if Loki had escaped then the first person to greet him would be Oswald. Ray smiled thinking Oswald may have really died. Well one down, two to go, Ray thought to himself.

Natasha Romanov Black Widow came in and just like in the movie, Hawkeye woke up. Both of them talked for awhile before Hawkeye said he wanted to pay back Loki for controlling him. Which Black Widow smiled and said, "I think you should ask Oswald for help in paying back Loki.".

"What Oswald is still alive ?", Ray said in shock.

"Yes, Oswald is still alive. When Loki couldn't find Oswald, he was hauled off by a member of his team that came in with Hawkeye. I think Loki really wanted to kill Oswald. That's why the damage on the Shield helicarrier was not so severe as most of Loki's team had to sacrifice themselves to get Loki off the Shield helicarrier. When Loki left the Shield helicarrier, he was still screaming Oswald I will kill you.", Natasha Romanov the Black Widow said with a smile.

"Does that mean, Oswald is a hero ?", Ray said in a girlish voice as he made a disgusted look.

"Boss ! I am a hero according to Nick Fury...", Oswald said proudly as he walked in.

Ray's face darkened and he said in a girlish voice, "Oswald remember what we agreed upon. No speaking unless I gave permission to. So if you want to speak raise up your hand.".

Oswald immediately raised up his hand.

"Put down your hand Oswald !", Ray shouted in a girlish voice.

"Butch, Oswald, Clara, the rest of the Hand had been evacuated from New York a few days ago. Only a few support staff are left in New York. You will join them and I will meet up with you after the invasion of the Chitauri.", Ray said in a girlish voice.

"Yes boss !", Butch and Oswald replied.

"Boss, Master can I follow you ?", Clara asked pleadingly.

"No. Clara. Stay with them at the meet up point. I will be in no danger. I will just be pretending to fight Loki and the Chitauri so I can make a name for myself as a hero. But first I need to talk to Nick Fury about getting Phil Coulson's dead body.", Ray said in a girlish voice with a smirk.

"Alright everyone set off and complete your own task.", Ray added in a girlish voice.

Oswald, Butch and Clara left and Ray went to see Nick Fury.

"Mr. Fury, can I have Phil Coulson's dead body. I think I might know someone that can save him.", Ray said in a girlish voice with a sweet smile.

"Who can save Phil Coulson, he is dead already ?", Nick Fury asked curiously.

"Umbrella Corporation, they are partners with Dragon Inc in medicine and life sciences, their life sciences technology is even higher than Dragon Inc.", Ray said in a girlish voice. Of course Ray is lying through his teeth. Yes, Dragon Inc and Umbrella Corporation are in business together because Umbrella Corporation needs money and Dragon Inc is providing that money by partnering with them. But all the patents are held by Dragon Inc.

"Okay if you believe that Umbrella Corporation can help revive him which I doubt, bring Phil Coulson's dead body to Umbrella Corporation.", Nick Fury said as he looked distracted.

"Thank you Mr. Fury.", Ray said in a girlish voice as he created a portal to Umbrella Corporation and brought Phil Coulson's dead body with him to Umbrella Corporation.

When Ray met with Albert Wesker, he got Albert Wesker to get a cell in Umbrella Corporation ready for Phil Coulson as he resurrected him again. When Phil Coulson was alive again Albert Wesker immediately injected him with a sedative to make him sleep. Ray smiled as he saw the live Phil Coulson again.

"Albert make sure that Phil Coulson is guarded well by your best agents in Umbrella Corporation. After he wakes up send him to Nick Fury. Don't let him know about the T-Virus or anything about Umbrella Corporation. If Phil Coulson or Nick Fury ask how did Phil Coulson resurrect, just tell him some bull shit story that you had a last experimental serum that you no longer have.", Ray said in a girlish voice with a smirk.

"Yes master ! I will get on it. I will also issue these guards with special military ordinance weapons but not with our own technology.", Albert Wesker said respectfully.

"Ha ! Ha ! Ha !", Ray laughed in a girlish creepy way as he transported himself near Stark Tower in New York.

Before that while Ray was in Umbrella Corporation he used magic to check himself and found that his blessings had doubled. Ray's strength had tripled and he could now lift 24 tons. Ray's telepathy and telekinesis had tripled in power, it was very strong to begin with, now that it had tripled, Ray wondered how strong he had become ? Ray also found out he could control time now. Ray's charm and lovely looks had also increased because most of the blessings are related to love and charm. Ray wondered why this keeps on happening to him. Why didn't he get blessing of death or a killer god so he could be a bad ȧss instead he got more blessings from gods of love and charm ?

While looking at the Chitauri fleet that had engaged with the Avengers and the military, Ray put on his ear piece as he wondered if he should really help out. Nah ! Let's just be a pretend super hero for now. As Ray walked into the battlefield he began to control the simple mind of the Chitauri and their monsters that they brought through the wormhole that Loki had created with the Space Stone.

Meanwhile Ray's bodyguard the creepy Clara had followed behind Ray while silently shadowing his every footsteps.

While somewhere safe in New York far away from Stark Towers, Butch and Oswald was sitting around with Void and Shadow as they were the back up that Ray had requested. Daredevil Matt Murdock and Elektra was there as well.

"Say Butch do you think we forgot something ? I think we are missing something here.", Oswald said as he looked around thoughtfully.

"What do you mean ?", Butch said as he opened his gay x-rated magazine around everyone. The front and back cover of Butch's magazine showed three men having gay sėx together.

"Butch sometimes I wonder if you openly showing your gay side is such a good thing...", Oswald said as he closed his eyes in disgust but he kept talking.

"I am glad I am blind. Unfortunately my hearing is too good at the moment.", Daredevil said as he heard the conversation and sensed the magazine opening as well as sensing Void, Shadow and Elektra turning their heads and sight away from Butch. Daredevil Matt Murdock could also hear Oswald's constant talking.

"Oh ! I remembered what Master told me to do if Oswald talked too much.", Elektra said as she looked at Oswald and walked towards him.

"Oh ! What did master say to do ? Tell me ? Tell me is it a surprise...", Oswald talked excitedly.

"This.", Elektra said as she proceeded to gently tap Oswald on the head. Oswald fell unconscious immediately and slumped on his chair.

"Now that that problem is solved, I wonder how do we solve the other problem.", Elektra said aloud as he looked at Butch. Void and Shadow looked at Butch as well. Daredevil Matt Murdock didn't care as he was blind and just shrugged his shoulders.

Butch seeing Oswald slumped on his chair quickly ran to the toilet to read his gay x-rated magazine in private.