It's a diary

Chapter 86 1.7
I didn't wake up until late at night. After I woke up, I looked around blankly for a long time, but I didn't turn on the lights. It was pitch black and I couldn't see anything clearly.

I was always like this when I was in school, tossing and turning in the silent night, having trouble falling asleep, but stubbornly refusing to take more sleeping pills.

What is this?

Lying down, I opened my eyes and looked up quietly. I didn't see the lights on the ceiling. All I saw was a few bed boards.

The light of the street lamp shone in from the window on the balcony, and the warm yellow light outside the corridor was also on.

Sometimes I feel scared too.

I'm not afraid of walking at night, I'm just afraid that the road has no end and requires me to keep walking.

Cowards simply don't have that kind of courage.

I can only pray that time can go faster, even faster, preferably skipping one year, two years...

In fact, what I most want is to fast forward time to the time when everyone who loves me doesn’t love me back, or to fast forward to the time when I can stop loving everyone.

I was thinking about putting pen to paper, but I didn’t know how to continue writing.

I remember that the winter of the year I just reviewed was quite cold.

In winter, it gets dark early and lights up later.When I went to school in the morning, it was still dark all around and I couldn't see anything, but I could smell the fragrance of osmanthus wafting not far away.

After that it rained for a while, non-stop and non-stop.

During the period when the rain kept falling, the scent of osmanthus drifting from not far away became stronger.

I still remember that during that time I really liked running outside.That year, Beiyu was actually very stable. "

Even if it's raining, I will hold that transparent umbrella out and wander around aimlessly.

I really don’t have any ideas, just wandering around.When I get tired, I sit under the eaves. Sometimes I buy a piece of fried sweet potato, sometimes I get a candied haws, and while I eat, I watch the drizzle being blown everywhere by the wind.

If there is a vehicle passing by, you can see the raindrops clearly with the bright headlights.

It feels pretty good, except that I can't finish the piece of fried sweet potato every time, which is a bit of a loss.

During that time, it rained non-stop, the wind blew again, and the temperature dropped sharply. Most of the fish in Beiyu were actually frozen to death.

So I hate winter.

Because I hate the cold, I cherish the warm sunshine that returns in winter.

At that time, I still had the strength, and I liked to find a place to bask in the sun as soon as it came out.I have sunbathed many times with the stray calico cat in the community. The more times we meet, I can’t help but wonder: Why am I not a cat?

Maybe it was because of the stimulation of the three-flowered cat. During that time, I always told people around me: "I really want to be a cat! If someone raises it, it will meow and eat. If no one raises it, I will eat." The worst case scenario is to dig through the trash can. In fact, the cat’s life is at stake.”

A friend's reply was the funniest. She said: "If you were a cat, I would keep you."

This answer is something I didn't expect, because she is very lazy.

I replied jokingly: "You always eat three meals together into one meal. If I follow you, I will be hungry for three meals and two."

I don’t know why, but I always felt that what she said at that time was very serious. "Although I'm unreliable, if you are really a cat, you won't be hungry."

I went out tonight, visited a few places and bought two pairs of shoes.I'm quite happy to go out for a walk. I don't know why, but I just want to walk. It's inexplicable.

Of course, I also went to eat a cone.Winter is great for eating cones because they don’t melt easily.In the summer, it melted within two bites.

On June [-]st this year, I went to eat a cone with Hippo.Even though we had to be on duty that day, even though she went to the teacher to get the composition outline. When she left the school, she saw the sunshine was just right, the banyan trees were lush, and she saw students from other classes holding the dolls given by the teacher.

I asked her out of nowhere, "Today is Children's Day. Do you want to go eat ice cream!?"

She paused and said in a joking tone, "Please?"

"I can afford a three-dollar cone for the time being, and a six-dollar sundae hands-free. So are you going?"

"Go, you have to go to treat us!"

So we sat on the roadside under the banyan tree and finished the cone.

The hair that was cut short at that time has now grown into long hair again.

I thought about Jiajia, but I never went to find her. I couldn't seem to find any reason or excuse.

I also thought of another classmate who was studying in Beiyu but dropped out.

She and I had little contact in the two years after we resumed school, but on the eve of graduation, I always went around to buy breakfast in the morning, and she asked me to help bring food, so we barely had some communication.It started off really well, and I reported it happily.

Later, tut.

Some time ago, I dropped out of school.I asked her, and she said it was a dormitory problem, and I didn't know if she was being punished or if she was doing it to someone else.

Her temper is probably just a result of being bullied by others.

I feel like there are very few normal people in the world.

I used to think that stupid people were in the minority, but when I went to other places and met more people, I realized how good my upbringing was.

It is actually a wise choice not to stay in Beiyu and study elsewhere.

Maybe it’s better to stay in Beiyu.

I am tired from staying in Beiyu, very tired.The past experiences and memories weighed me down.

So I left.Even though I knew the process of accepting the new environment would be long, I left without hesitation.

I thought about it for a long time, for several years, and spent a lot of energy before I had the courage to leave.

It took three years to try to leave Beiyu. The difficulties and obstacles during the period are no longer important. What is worth mentioning again and again is: I got my wish.

I left Beiyu as I wished, went to another city, and lived alone.

If I had accumulated enough courage in that city, I could go further.If not, then I will go back to Beiyu, to this small peninsula with coasts on three sides.

I've also thought about going further south.

For example, Phuket, Sri Lanka, and Melbourne... I like Melbourne very much. For a period of time, I can't help but think: If I can have the courage and capital to fly to Melbourne at any time, then in my world, There will never be winter again.

After spending the summer in Beiyu, I headed to Melbourne to wait for the arrival of spring.Summer in Melbourne has come to an end, and the oleanders on the edge of the snow-white beaches of North Island have ushered in a new round of flowering.

There will never be a cold winter that I fear.

I also thought about heading further north.

For example, go to see the most beautiful landscapes in the world, go to the city of Nanjing full of sycamore trees, or go to the three northeastern provinces to build a snowman bigger than me.

……

I have a premonition: next spring will be very warm.

I hate Beiyu, but I like it the most.

I like the insects that spin silk from the banyan trees and hang in the air in the spring in Beiyu; I like the long summer in Beiyu; I like every tourist passing by on the streets of Beiyu; I also deeply like this city that is not good at all.

The cat owned by the owner of the music store next to the school is very clingy and even more coquettish than the cat in Cat Curry.Whenever school is over, it squats at the door and calls out to students passing by through the glass.

Most students would stop and look at it, or make some weird expressions, causing it to bark.

During that time, I would always go in with the Crying Rat to look at it.

The boss always calls it "Wheat Wheat", so at first I always thought it was called "Wheat".It should never happen. It will only pass when the boss knocks on the bowl and puts the rice on the table.

It can be seen that the boss really wants to kill the siomai, because it only thinks of the boss when it is hungry and wants to cook. At other times, it will only act coquettishly in front of the students outside.

In the words of the boss: "It is very good at pretending. Just like the cats in the cat cafe, it is not afraid of people. As soon as you get out of school, it squats there and barks. It usually lies down to sleep and ignores me."

I also asked the boss about the origin of the name "Shaomai".The boss said that it was caused by the girl who raised it before.

Later, the Crying Mouse also got a cat. It seemed to be only a few months old when he bought it. It was a blue cat.Named "Nuomi". "

Diagonally opposite the piano store (across the road), there is a flower shop called "Early Spring".I have always thought that this name is a good one, early spring, early spring, early spring.

Later, I wrote in the article: I heard an old man from Beiyu say: Winter in Beiyu is very short, and as long as those ten days of cold weather pass, it can be considered early spring.

Next to the flower shop is a milk tea shop.The tea in that shop is very fragrant.

There is nothing special about the milk tea shop. The interesting thing is that in that shop, students can get a dollar cheaper.

……

(End of this chapter)