i'm not a bad man

Chapter 34 I hope you will be a happy woman
While we were talking, Ren Ran and I had already arrived at the door of the ward where Ba Xiaoguang was located; coincidentally, at this time, Ba Xiaoyun also walked out of it carrying an incubator.When we met, her first reaction was not to say hello, but as if her mood had been violently shaken, and she immediately shed tears.

This reaction was beyond my expectation, so I didn’t know what to say for a moment. However, Ren Ran was smart and immediately guessed that the girl in front of her was Ba Xiaoguang’s sister. She walked to Ba Xiaoyun’s side and held her hand. He stopped her and said softly: "You must be Xiaoyun, I am Han Chao's friend, my name is Ren Ran, you can call me Sister Ran... Han Chao and I have been talking about your brother on the way here... ...It’s really not a big deal. There’s no such thing as a smooth life. When something happens, we won’t hide or be afraid. We really can’t handle it anymore. Don’t we still have a group of friends? Don’t be afraid, you know?”

Ren Ran's words were so kind and warm that Ba Xiaoyun stopped her tears. She nodded to Ren Ran and finally said: "Sister Ran, I'm not afraid, I just feel sorry for Brother Han Chao... My brother is committing suicide." Before, I left a suicide note and 1 yuan, asking me to return the 1 yuan to Brother Han Chao no matter what, but now the 1 yuan has been paid to the hospital... I know, they are here It’s very difficult for people who work on construction sites to earn 1 yuan, but I really can’t pay back Han Chao for the time being.”

Hearing what Ba Xiaoyun said, I suddenly felt relieved. Ren Ran also seemed to be relieved. She smiled and said: "Silly boy, you haven't really entered the society yet, so you can't stand on the level of an adult yet." To understand this society at a high level... We all know that this society is cruel, and the reality is even crueler; therefore, it is even more necessary for such a group of people to unite together and help each other... Your brother Han Chao is indeed a person who has no time to take care of himself, but his He also has a cool personality. When he lent the 1 yuan to your brother, he didn't weigh the gains and losses at all. I believe that if one day, your brother Han Chao encounters difficulties and needs your brother's help, your brother will also I will definitely help him without hesitation. This is the friendship between men. What we women have to do is respect their emotions and don’t destroy their emotions by being too concerned about gains and losses... Men are very tired. It’s really not easy to have a reliable brother by your side... Your brother and your Han Chao brother have such a relationship... So, these worries of yours are nothing to worry about..."

After saying that, Ren Ran focused her eyes on me, as if asking me if what she said was right.I nodded heavily, feeling inexplicably warm in my heart. I also felt that Renran was already an indispensable person in my life, because when I didn’t know how to express it, she was the only one who could speak my heart out for me. …

If she was really my sister and lived in the same home as me, maybe my family wouldn't be torn apart and I wouldn't have to wander outside for so many years.

At this moment, I began to respect Ren Ran, and I also felt a sense of dependence on her. Although I am a man and she is a woman, and men should not rely on women, she is really kind and warm, just like winter. The warm sun shines into my frost-filled heart.

……

Ba Xiaoyun went to the canteen to prepare food for Ba Xiaoguang. Ren Ran and I entered the ward together. We saw Ba Xiaoguang lying on his side on the bed. We couldn't see his face and didn't know whether he was asleep or awake. .

I tried calling him: "Xiaoguang..."

Ba Xiaoguang didn't respond, but his body was trembling. He didn't sleep. He just didn't know how to face me. But this time, I didn't say anything to comfort him. I said to him in an extremely stern tone: "Xiaoguang, you If you want to still be a man, you have to face up to everything you should face up to...At this time, you can only save yourself, strengthen yourself, and then overcome the cowardice in your heart, otherwise others will not be able to help you even if they want to."

Ba Xiaoguang burst into tears: "Brother, I heard everything you said outside. It's my incompetence... It's my incompetence. I can only hold others back. I'm not qualified to be your brother."

"No, Xiaoguang, you are not incompetent, you are just unfortunate... The same thing, no matter who happens to it, is not a pain that can be easily endured... Please look back first, I brought Sister Ran to see you, you Say hello to Sister Heran first, this is the first thing you have to face now."

At this time, Ren Ran also echoed and said: "Xiaoguang, we have met once in the bar before, and we have a close relationship. Although we only have a close relationship, I think we are already very good friends. , because I regard Han Chao as my younger brother in my heart, and Han Chao is the bridge between you and me. After we have been together for a long time, I will treat you as my younger brother... So, don’t reject a sister like me, Okay?"

Ba Xiaoguang finally turned around and tried to wipe away his tears.

Ren Ran smiled and said: "That's right. As long as you have the courage to face it, you won't be afraid of not being able to find a solution to the problem." After saying that, Ren Ran took the money he had prepared in advance from his bag. He quietly handed it to my hand and motioned for me to hand it to Ba Xiaoguang.

I took it from Ren Ran's hand and put the money in the document bag. I took the money out and put it on Ba Xiaoguang's bedside. I said seriously: "Xiaoguang, this 15 yuan was given by Sister Ran." Yours, I know you are very afraid of owing other people's favors, but you don't have to think about repaying this money for the time being. You solve your own difficulties first... But before that, I have to say a few words to you... "

Looking at Ba Xiaoguang's pale and bitter look, I suddenly had some indisputable complaints in my heart. I wanted to teach Ba Xiaoguang a lesson so that he could learn from this lesson. In my opinion, as a man, Even if he is still alive, he has no right to give up his life, not to mention that Ba Xiaoguang already has his own child.

My face darkened, Ren Ran noticed my mood, and immediately pulled me behind him who wanted to speak again, and then said: "At this time, don't say any words of blame. I believe Xiaoguang is better than anyone else now." I'm afraid, I regret it more than anyone else... Humans are not machines. As long as they have emotions, there will be times when they can't think about it. None of us can stand and talk without backache. If we encounter the same difficulties, maybe we are not as good as Xiaoguang. ...Xiaoguang, this money is indeed mine, but don’t mind if I tell the truth. If it weren’t for Han Chao, even if I wasn’t short of money, I wouldn’t give it to someone I only met once. So in essence , this money is given to you by Han Chao, and it is because of Han Chao that I can do this without hesitation."

Ba Xiaoguang looked at Ren Ran, then at me, and finally nodded heavily.

"Han Chao, please have a few words with Xiaoguang. Don't talk about the past. Just talk about the future and hope." I calmed down my desire to complain, then smiled and said to Ba Xiaoguang: "Xiaoguang, we We have been together day and night for more than four months. I understand your character. You will definitely regard this money as a burden on your heart, which is correct... But you can repay this favor in other ways... Just now, Sister Ran asked I'm talking about hope with you, let's just say hope... Sister Ran recently opened a decoration company, and there will be a lot of things to do in the future. Many of these things are what we are good at, so I hope that we brothers can work together and work together. Starting a business means not only changing your own life, but also repaying Sister Ran for her kindness... This is what I want to tell you the most."

"Brother, I know."

Ba Xiaoguang couldn't say anything sensational. When he said he understood, he really remembered it deeply in his heart. So, based on this understanding, I nodded to him heavily, and at the same time, I already had us in my heart. The picture of working and struggling together, and the pain now will eventually pass.

……

After leaving the hospital, the first thing I did was light a cigarette for myself.This has become a habit of mine, especially after a turbulent mood.

When I was about to finish sucking, I opened my mouth and said to Ren Ran who had been standing beside me: "Aren't you going to see a client? Let's go."

"I thought about it, you'd better not go."

"what happened?"

"You just drank and hurt your health. If I take you with me, they will definitely make a fuss with you... I can just go by myself. Anyway, I haven't made up my mind to take on this process, so there is no need to work so hard. I asked Several knowledgeable friends have the same opinion as you, they all say that four months is too late and too tight, and there is basically no possibility of completion."

I looked Ren Ran squarely in the face, and then said to her in an extremely determined tone: "Don't be afraid, Sister Ran... just be bold and take on this project. I promise to complete it in four months."

Ren Ran had a surprised expression on his face: "What's wrong with you? You've been objecting to me taking on this project before."

"You're right. If we can complete this project within the construction period, we will definitely create the best construction team and become famous in the industry..." After a short pause, I smiled again and said : "The most important thing is that when you really establish yourself in the decoration industry, you will have the capital to start the new life you want... I hope you can be a happy woman."

There were tears in Renran's eyes, but I didn't like crying, so I kept smiling with her.

"Han Chao, I also hope you can be a happy man... You have been wandering away from home all these years. Although you don't say anything, you actually miss home in your heart, right?"

Speaking of my family, I felt a burst of pain in my heart, but I still kept a smile and said: "A little bit, especially when it snows, I will think of that New Year's Eve... …There is heavy snow falling outside, and the heater at home is blowing warm air...My mother is making dumplings, my father is pasting couplets, and I am playing chess with my grandfather..."

As I spoke, the smile disappeared from my face, leaving only painful nostalgia.

At this time, Ren Ran suddenly took my arm and said with a warm smile: "None of us are going to see the clients anymore... Let's go home... Go back to my house. I'll call my mother right away to get ready. Dumpling fillings, let’s make dumplings and eat dumplings together tonight.”

(End of this chapter)