i'm not a bad man

Chapter 35 Let's meet
After wandering outside for so many years, I have never touched anything that symbolizes reunion. Therefore, in these years, I never eat dumplings or glutinous rice balls on New Year’s Eve; on the first day of the Lunar New Year or the Mid-Autumn Festival, I even treat myself I stayed in the RV all day, not going anywhere because I was afraid of seeing other people’s reunions and excitement.

The more scared I am, the more I care about this matter. It's not that I don't want to eat dumplings, nor do I really hate the excitement. I'm just afraid that I will be drowned in other people's happiness, and only loneliness and loneliness will accompany me.

If I were with Ren Ran and her family, I wouldn't have these fears and worries. Ren Ran's character and cultivation have indirectly told me that her parents must be very easy to get along with. I would eat at her home. Serve dumplings with the flavor of family affection and enjoy the warmth of a family reunion. These are what I dream of, but I can't go.

Because, I already have a very sacred sense of respect for Ren Ran in my heart.

"Han Chao, what kind of dumplings do you like to eat? Do you like three kinds of fresh food? There is a vegetable market behind our house that sells everything, especially seafood. I asked my mother to buy freshly peeled shrimps and some There are cuttlefish, yellow croaker, and mackerel... We won’t eat the three delicacies, but we will eat our most famous mackerel dumplings in Qingdao.”

Ren Ran really wanted me to go, so he talked so much without noticing what I was thinking.

"Don't go, Sister Ran."

"what happened?"

After a brief silence, I turned around and looked at Ren Ran and said, "You are married and have your own family. I am a single man and am not suitable to go home with you."

Ren Ran smiled and asked, "What's wrong with me being married? What's wrong with you being a single man?"

"A woman who is happily married will definitely take good care of her marital status. She will avoid things that should be avoided... I don't want your parents to know that you are not happy... You don't want to do that either, right?"

The smile disappeared from Ren Ran's face little by little until his expression solidified.

"Sister Ran, I'd better go with you to meet the client. It's okay to have a drink, as long as we can get things done."

Ren Ran loosened his hold on my arm, and when he spoke to me again, his tone had lost all emotion: "I can still negotiate this matter without you going. That's it for today. We'll contact you if there are other matters."

After saying that, Ren Ran got into his car and left me alone in the parking lot of the hospital... At this moment, the night was like a beast, swallowing up all the traces of the day, and then flooded the city. , also overwhelmed me.

I shook my head and smiled bitterly, could she not understand?
But she still got angry with me, this is a woman, her sensibility is a mess.

……

After leaving the hospital, I wandered around the street for a while and ate a bowl of seafood noodles before returning home.

There was no purified water in my home, so I drove it to a nearby restaurant, spent some money to replenish purified water, and then found a public toilet to dispose of the sewage that had accumulated recently.

This is the most inconvenient part of living in an RV, and I had a lot of quarrels with Luan Yu because of this. That day, we parked the car in a service area in a northern city. It was snowing very heavily outside, and I was busy repairing the RV. Luan Yu went to deal with the accumulated sewage.

The road was too slippery. Luan Yu fell hard on the road and broke the sewage tank. The sewage flowed all over the floor. I quickly put down what I was doing and went to help her, but she lay on the ground and cried bitterly... …

I thought she was injured, but the next moment, she stood up on her own, kicked over the cracked sewage tank, and shouted at me: "Han Chao, I will never treat this broken car as a human being." This is my home... There is no such troublesome home in this world, I’ve had enough!”

There were too many people watching, and I lost face even more. I yelled at her excitedly: "Every time you encounter some trouble, this is not your fucking home... It takes you from south to north, watching There are so many scenery that others cannot see, why don't you say that it is not your home?...You have no fucking spirit of benevolence and righteousness, you only know how to burn bridges!"

That evening, the snow was falling heavily, and there were many people pointing and pointing. I remembered this scene, but forgot how I and Luan Yu finally stopped.

Anyway, we returned to the RV and closed the door. Luan Yu stared at the heavy snow outside the car window for a while, and I flushed the cracked sewage tank in the bathroom, and then repaired it bit by bit with tape until I was sure there was no leakage.

I know that from that day on, Luan Yu and I have become inseparable. The reason why she stayed with me for so long is just because she still loves me, but she already has a pair of wings in her heart, just like when I left my own Like home.

……

I parked the RV in a place with street lights. I took some water in a basin and started wiping every window on the RV. The windows must be polished because they are the eyes of the RV. They are the only ones. Only when it is clean can we see each other's hearts clearly and communicate... In my heart, it is already my friend and has never left me for so many years.

After making sure that all the windows were wiped clean, I smiled with satisfaction, and then said: "Old man, how many years have we been together? Three years, or four years?... I can't remember clearly, I just remember that she has left. It’s been almost two years... Tell me, where did she go? Will she still remember you, remember me, remember the days when we were on the road together?... Haha, the most unreliable thing in this world is probably human beings The relationship with others... Actually, I knew she would leave a long time ago, what about you? Did you also feel that she would leave?... But I didn't expect that after she left, she never came back. …”

Having said this, I couldn't help but feel a little sad, so I lit a cigarette out of habit, leaned against the lamppost of the street lamp, and smoked silently... Looking at the smoke that kept rising and quickly dissipating, my thoughts began to wander. : What is Luan Yu doing at this moment?Now that it's time to eat, does she have her own home?If she already has one, is there a significant other at home who will accompany her to dinner?
I can feel that Luan Yu is somewhere in this world, but there is no way to imagine her current life, because we have experienced too many things together, and all I can think about is her life with me. In the scene together, when she falls in love, lives, and has a relationship with someone else, she is no longer the Luan Yu I know.After gently exhaling the depression in my heart, I threw away the cigarette butt in my hand; tonight, I didn't want to go to the beach to spend the night again, so I stopped in this abandoned square to look at the lights of the city. People always have to live in reality.

……

After closing the door of the RV, I found all the tools for carving, then turned on the lamp next to the dining table and started carving carefully on a piece of wood. Although Lu Xi said that she liked straw woven ones, it was still wood. more refined.

I had entered a state of forgetfulness, so much so that I was still busy in the middle of the night. It was not until I carved the last knife and a lifelike deer was held in my hand that I came back to my senses.

I looked at it for a moment and felt very satisfied, so I put it on the dining table and took a photo, which of course I wanted to send to Lu Xi.

"Like it?"

It was already very late, and I wasn’t sure whether Lu Xi would reply to this message, but I still sat at the dining table and waited. Gradually I became sleepy, and I lay on the table again, looking at the bird standing in the center of the table. The little deer's consciousness became increasingly blurred.

I actually fell asleep like this. When I woke up again, it was already the morning of the next day. Before my eyes were fully opened, I quickly picked up my phone and looked at it. But this time I was disappointed. I still Didn't wait for Lu Xi's response.

After being alone for a while, I went back to bed, but I couldn't fall asleep anyway, and the noise gradually came from outside the car window, and the city would start to get busy again at its own pace.

I simply didn't sleep, went to the toilet, washed up, and then found a breakfast shop nearby and had breakfast. It was extremely rare that my life became regular.

……

I started to try running. I ran from the bustling city to the seaside and watched the sunrise. In fact, a person’s life is not that bad. Although I have less expectations for the future, it is better than being stable and quiet...

At this moment, I am really calm, accepting this city in peace and accepting everything that is about to happen here.

At this time, the phone finally made a vibrating sound.Familiar friends, no one has ever sent me a message in the morning, it must be Luxi.

With a strong sense of expectation, I took my phone out of my pocket, but it was not a WeChat message at all, but a text message sent to me by a completely unfamiliar number.

"Are you a Korean Chao?"

"I am, who are you?"

"It's been so long and you still haven't changed your mobile phone number. You're definitely not someone who likes to change easily."

I frowned and thought, imagining who could speak in such a tone.

"No need to guess, I am Luan Yu...are you still in Qingdao?"

My mind went blank at first, and then countless emotions surged out. I tried my best to restrain myself, but my body was honestly shaking: "I am in Qingdao."

"I'm in Qingdao too, let's meet, right now."

"it is good."

"Tell me a place, and I'll find you."

"That's where you left."

"it is good."

(End of this chapter)