i'm not a bad man

Chapter 388 I also tell the truth
I suddenly realized that from this moment on, this old locust tree became a symbol of telling the truth. There was Luan Yu before me and Lu Xi behind me. I have indeed changed a lot over the years, but my personality that likes to tell the truth has never been there. Change, and the most hurtful thing in this world is the truth, so this kind of harm continues...

I could no longer look at the deer stream in front of me. I kept looking at the lights at the bottom of the mountain. The lights were flickering. I gradually couldn't concentrate, and because of this, I thought of many scenes, which happened today.

I saw with my own eyes that the car Lu Xi was driving was pinched between the large truck and the mountain after being scratched, unable to move. For a woman who had never driven far away by herself, how did she feel at that time? Woolen cloth?

Do you think it's not worth it?

If she knew that I would say these words to her under this big locust tree, she would definitely feel that it was not worth it; even then, when she lowered the car window and looked at me, her eyes full of fear and fear, I actually I didn't give her a word of comfort, I just told her that she shouldn't drive such a big car. To her, this was indifferent enough, but she still showed a relieved expression the moment she was sure it was me.

Later, when we changed cars, I saw that she had put a lot of snacks and drinks in the passenger seat; presumably, in order to rush on the road, she did not stop for a proper meal and kept filling herself up with these snacks, all of which were silent Giving, but I didn't give her any response at all.

She must be a little chilled by this unworthiness, right?
I just stood in the wind, guessing her mood.

……

In my silence, Lu Xi spoke again: "Han Chao, since I have to tell the truth while standing under this old locust tree, then I should also tell the truth."

I then turned to look at Luxi. The wind not only made me panic, but also messed up her hair.

"When I decided to come to this place, my biggest motivation was not my promise to Luan Yu, but my fantasy of meeting you on the road... You must have passed by that observation deck, right? That was my favorite I want to see you, so I wait and wait there, from noon to dusk... I don’t know why I want to see you so much. Maybe it’s because I don’t know how to face this long period of time alone. I wanted you to lead my journey, but even if I waited at the observation deck for so long, I couldn’t wait for you... When I left, I comforted myself that maybe this highway was not necessary. Road... Later, I rested for a night in a small county town. I looked at the navigation repeatedly. In fact, it was the only way to pass... At that time, I really wanted to drop everything and give you a call and ask if you were there. It’s not that we missed it…”

"I arrived at the observation deck at dusk. When did you leave? It's best to be specific to the minute."

Lu Xi almost didn't think before he replied: "Five-twenty."

But I couldn’t remember the specific time I arrived at the observation deck. I only remembered that I made a video call with Zhao Yingrou after arriving. So I quickly opened WeChat and found that the video call between me and Zhao Yingrou started at 32:[-].

Feeling regretful in my heart, I whispered back: "If you had waited twelve more minutes, I would have been there."

"It doesn't matter, I'll see you later anyway."

"Yes."

After pondering for a while, Lu Xi said to me again: "If the same thing happens to Jiaojiao, she will hug you desperately the moment she gets off the car..."

In memory, this was the first time Lu Xi compared herself to Qiao Jiao, and there was some helplessness in her words. "She will do this, but you have always been the kind of person who moisturizes things quietly."

"Actually...as long as you...as long as you say something to me at that time...don't be afraid, I'm here...I will...I will hug you desperately...I'm really scared, that truck is too big I couldn't see anything, I only heard the sound of the car door being torn open, and I tried my best to hide in the passenger seat, but I was so nervous that I couldn't even remember to unbuckle my seat belt."

These are things that I could not see, but they also really happened to Lu Xi. It was not until she stood under this old locust tree that she told me.

I had mixed feelings in my heart, and it took me a long time to say to her: "I'm sorry, I'm not qualified to let you endure this."

"Don't say sorry easily, and don't say you are unqualified... We have gone through a lot together, haven't we?... From the first time you broke into my room... Even if we never have the chance to meet again, I will never forget you in my life, because I have never seen such a nasty man... However, this man who I thought was the most nasty man did not hesitate to drink two kilograms in order to help me get the vinyl record I wanted most. Liquor, I ended up in the hospital with stomach bleeding... Are there really men with such huge contrasts in this world?... From that time on, I will think of you from time to time... I will also find this very inexplicable... Later, For one reason or another, we have had many opportunities to get along... I didn't misjudge you, nor am I biased against you. You are just a very unruly man, but you always seem to be unruly, Talking about the pain in my heart... I also like freedom, but my job gives me too many constraints... Being a star has never been my dream. The reason why I did this is to help my family share the burden. Some, like you, my family has also experienced the darkest moments... But I am luckier than you, because it didn't take long for my dad to be reused again... However, when I wanted to withdraw, I found that I am already so helpless, I am burdened with so many contracts, and there are many people's livelihood problems... Actually, that time you broke into my room and was photographed by reporters, I also had a broken jar. After all, I can't help myself... So, every time I hear you talk about things on the road, I will be fascinated without knowing it. Later, I heard Luan Yu say a lot...mostly about you on the road. The interesting things I have experienced make me feel even more that this is the life I want after I completely break through myself... And this is what I really appreciate about you. Most people will only do this kind of thing after they become successful, but you But he had the courage to add the most beautiful scenery to his youth..."

Having said this, Lu Xi shook his head, and then after a period of silence, he said to me: "But since you came to the small town, everything has changed. You have begun to deliberately avoid your inner desires, and you no longer dare to do so as you did before. Being brave... Maybe you think this is a kind of maturity, but in my opinion, this is also a kind of involuntary... We have all been trapped by this kind of involuntary... So, I can really understand , why did you choose Jiaojiao...she is who you used to be...so fearless, so unhesitating...as long as she is by your side, you will never forget the high-spirited self...for Jiaojiao Said, of course you are also a good choice...I really want to bless you...I come here, but I don't want to recall this period of time in the future, and I will have regrets when I recall you as a man...So, I just try my best. for."

I looked at the Luxi River, and there were thousands of words surging in my heart, but I didn't know how to express them under this big locust tree.

Lu Xi didn't seem to want to listen to my words. She straightened her hair that was messed up by the wind, smiled and said to me: "I am quite interested in the sacrificial ceremony of climbing the knife ladder, so I will definitely do it." Stay and read... In the afternoon, I will prepare to leave here..."

I almost blurted out: "So fast!"

"If I don't leave, will I keep you living in the car?"

After pondering for a while, I added: "The way back will be more difficult, because we have to drive close to the side of the cliff for a long time."

"Don't be afraid. You will have nothing to fear when you come, and you will have no hesitation when you leave."

After saying that, Lu Xi glanced at me, and then turned around and entered the house without giving me a chance to speak...

I stood under the big locust tree until she turned off the light.

……

Later, I also went to the toilet, and then I realized that it was not as bad as I thought, because it had been renovated and it was not the previous dry toilet. It was very clean and even had a flushing tank.

(End of this chapter)