Learn some wonderful questioning techniques, mind reading techniques, and psychological control tech

Chapter 143 Part Two
Next: Psychological Control: Learn a little bit of psychological games and gain the power to control others

Chapter 1 Psychological Strategy 1: Weaving a network of contacts
Section [-] Say nice things about others behind their backs

Mental Wisdom Call:

Praise is a kind of knowledge, and its mysteries are endless, but the most effective praise is to praise the other party in front of a third party.

Skillful in control:

People always like to hear nice words. Even if they know that the other party is speaking flattery, they will still be complacent. This is the weakness of human nature.Praise is a kind of knowledge, and its mysteries are endless, but the most effective praise is to praise the other party in front of a third party.

When speaking nice things about someone else to someone, the effect is not the same when you say them to your face or behind your back.If you say it to your face, people will think that you are just flattering him and currying favor with him.When you say good things behind your back, people think that you are sincere and sincere, and they will appreciate your kindness and appreciate you.If you say good things about your boss in front of your boss and colleagues, your colleagues will say that you are flattering your boss and flattering your boss, which will easily lead to contempt from colleagues around you.In addition, this kind of positive praise has little effect, and may even have the danger of counterproductive.Your boss may lose face and say you are insincere.

An employee, during a lunchtime chat with his colleagues, said a few good words from his boss: "The manager is a very nice person, he handles affairs fairly, and is especially helpful to me. It is really a blessing to work for such a person. "I didn't expect that these few words would soon reach the manager's ears, which inevitably made the manager feel a little relieved and grateful.At the same time, the image of the employee has also improved.Even those "communicators" praised this employee incidentally when they communicated: This person is open-minded and has a noble personality, which is really good.

Saying good things about others behind their backs will be considered as coming from the heart and without personal motives. Its benefits can not only serve as an example to more people, but also enable the person being said to hear others "spreading good things". "After saying good words, I feel the authenticity and sincerity of this kind of praise, so that while the sense of honor is satisfied, it enhances self-motivation and trust in the person who said good words.

Because when you compliment the other party directly, the other party is likely to think that it is entertainment or compliment.If it is conveyed through a third party, the effect will be completely different.At this time, the person concerned must think that it is a serious compliment without hypocrisy, so he sincerely accepts it and is very grateful to you.If this person is your subordinate, he will work harder to repay your kindness of "knowledge".

Just imagine, if someone told you that so-and-so said a lot of nice things about you behind your back, would you be upset?This kind of compliment, if said to your face, may backfire and make you feel fake or suspect that he is not sincere.Why do those who hear it indirectly feel particularly pleasing to the ear?That's because you firmly believe that the other person is sincerely complimenting you.

Bismarck, the iron-blooded prime minister of Germany, in order to win over a congressman who was hostile to him, planned to praise the congressman in front of others. He knew that those people would definitely pass on his words to that congressman after hearing it.Later, the two became political allies who talked about everything.

In fact, there are countless places around us where this method can be used.For example, when parents want their children to study hard, if they teach their children all day long, it is difficult to say how effective it will be. If the children know from other people's parents' expectations and care for them, the parents' hard work on themselves will naturally generate great motivation. .

(End of this chapter)