I loved you so deeply

Chapter 47 Life and Death (7)
She discussed with her father that after the summer vacation, and after Gu Yongming completed this task, she would go to the city's swimming team to sign up for the competition.

The day her father went to sea, she was hugged by her mother and looked at her from afar. She waved to her father cheerfully and tenderly. She said, father, when you come back, remember to send me to sign up.

Haidi blew long and black smoke. Gu Yongming, wearing a white military uniform and gloves, saluted her and his mother. The ship gradually moved away in sight.

The sea water pierces through the bones, Gu Jin is still sinking down, she closed her eyes, a lot of transparent bubbles gushed out from her nose and mouth, her thick black hair was rippling in the water, lifeless.

As soon as the picture turned, she saw the scene on the pier that day.

During the six-hour drive from Namwang Island, she was held tightly by her mother in her arms, silent all the way, and her mother only occasionally turned her head and wiped her tears with her hands.

On an unfamiliar pier, two huge salvage ships were working.

Gu Jin was led by her mother, stood on it and stared blankly at everything. In her young world view, she came into contact with the definition of death for the first time. This definition was firmly nailed to her father, making her fearful.

The sea breeze is so cool.

All day and night, my mother fell asleep in the jeep behind her from exhaustion. She slipped out of the car and patted the icy sea water with her little hands. She begged childishly, "O sea, O sea, please give me back my father."

Then there was a sudden commotion at the end of the pier, and someone shouted: "I found it!"

Mother ran out of the car and rushed over quickly.

A lifeboat on the sea was rapidly approaching the shore. Two people in life jackets were carrying a roll of white cloth. My mother covered her mouth and wailed.Someone solemnly carried the roll of white cloth ashore. Gu Jin's mother tightly covered her eyes, but through the slits between her fingers, she still saw it.

I saw the dead body of my father.

Unrecognizable, cold all over, his father's body.

He was wearing a white military uniform and dark blue military trousers. He was unrecognizable, and his body was still dripping wet. The water drops left marks on the pier. Uncle Pang cried out mournfully: "To Salute to the martyrs."

Gu Jin knew that her father had left her forever.

She hated the sea, hated everything here.

Gu Jin closed her eyes, there seemed to be a whistling wind in her ears, and then she thought of Pang Zheng.

The Pang Zheng who was still smiling and waving at her before leaving said he was sorry when I came back, and he said that if it is not dangerous, he will take you to see it when I come back.

The gray sky, the continuous rainstorm, Gu Jin came to her senses, she began to row upwards desperately, her swimming skills that had been forgotten by her seemed to be awakened suddenly, she was no longer afraid, she knew that she was going to find Pang Zheng.

He cannot die.

She couldn't bear any dear one in her life to leave her again, that would be more painful than her death, and she would rather her die.

She was swimming aimlessly, not knowing where to go, not knowing where to go.

Her hair stuck to her face, she was shivering from the cold, Gu Jin begged over and over again: "Pang Zheng... Pang Zheng..."

After an unknown amount of time, Gu Jin felt that he was being dragged up by something.

Breathing fresh air again, the sun was dazzling, and she frowned, as if floating into another world.She thought she died and went to heaven.

Lei Xi stood at the door of a quaint thatched hut, looking at Gu Jin who was wearing a simple oxygen mask in the room, and chatted quickly with the doctor at the aid station.

"Long-term hypoxia, the possibility of lung infection cannot be ruled out..."

"If there is no lung infection, God willing, she will wake up soon."

The medical conditions in Africa are simple, far inferior to those in China, and there are black people and strangers speaking noisy languages ​​everywhere.

When Gu Jin was rescued, it seemed that every inch of his body was gushing out with sea water.Her eyes were tightly closed, her lips were purple.The Cape of Good Hope is too far away from the hospital in the urban area, so we can only take a private car that came here to travel to the nearby villages.

The local kind-hearted people told them that ten kilometers to the west, there is a traditional tribal village with a simple medical aid station, which was originally intended to rescue tourists who were injured by wild animals nearby.

Lacey sighed heavily and sat on a chair outside the thatched hut.Pang Zheng was next to him, with his head down, and water was dripping from his hair, which gradually gathered into a pool at his feet. He had the same shocking scars as Lacey on his arms. He didn't speak, and no one knew he was there. what to think.

"I'm sorry," Lacey said.

Pang Zheng pursed his lips, bent over, and he was unmoved by the blood gradually oozing from his back.

Lacey added: "When she jumped into the sea, she could see that she really didn't want to live."

Pang Zheng closed his eyes, unable to tell whether it was water or tears on his face.

Lacey is a photographer best at capturing the ever-changing emotions and expressions of human nature.

When Gu Jin rushed into the sea, her eyes were determined, without any hesitation, they went to pull her, the waves suddenly hit her, she struggled desperately, and a wave smashed her into the sea.She was ups and downs in the water waves, neither asking for help nor shouting, when her life was threatened so tragically, she still wanted to jump down.

That is the despair that will never return, it is the farewell of life without love.

Pang Zheng stood up and looked in through the window. Gu Jin's palm-sized face was half covered by the oxygen mask, with clips on her fingers, and the vital signs kept beeping, proving that she was still alive.

He looked at her fixedly: "She can't swim."

"What?" Lacey didn't hear clearly.

"She can't swim," Pang Zheng said again, and fell silent again.

It was hard for him to imagine if he hadn't come back, would he have really been separated from her, not the kind of separation from one place to another, but separation, the kind that would never see each other again.

He and Lacey went to Dakama Peak. At first, the condition was very good. We took a lot of photos, and the wind was calm. When we set off at noon to go back, the wind direction changed drastically.

Pang Zheng pointed to the wind vane on the speedboat and shouted, "Killing wave!"

Lacey turned her head, shocked by the scene behind her.

The murderous wave, the front part is like a cliff, and the rear part is like a gentle hillside. When it splashes, it is often as high as 15 meters to 20 meters. It usually only appears frequently in winter.

The small speedboat began to turbulently, and Pang Zheng applied the accelerator to the bottom, only wanting to get out of this area before the waves rushed.

But it was too late.

Because of the storm, dark clouds fell, as if you could touch them with your hand. The polar wind caused rotating waves. The two kinds of waves were superimposed, and the sea conditions became worse. The entire sea surface seemed to be boiling continuously. roll.

Pang Zheng was yelling at him, but he couldn't hear him at all. The speedboat was overturned and the life buoys were scattered. Lacey hugged two of them and quickly submerged in the deep blue water.

The two were separated, and Lei Xi was fatally ill. She got a lifebuoy, floated all the way through the rainy sea, and returned by a nearby search and rescue boat.

Pangzheng was in bad shape and was completely sucked into the sea.

He struggled for a full four hours, with the bottom of the speedboat upside down, the sharp iron cutting his arms and legs, and he had only one thought, he couldn't die.

He recalled in his mind the life-saving common sense that the old man had recited in his ears countless times when he was a child.

Escape the wave area, don't soak in the water, identify the direction as much as possible, the most important thing is not to panic, wait.

The southeast wind indicates that the wind and rain will stop soon.

The murderous wave lasted only a dozen seconds, and the fine rain fell on the sea. Because the bottom of the speedboat was filled with water, it was unlikely that the speedboat would be overturned again. Pang Zheng climbed to the bottom of the boat, ignoring the many wounds on his body , and began to drift as far as possible in the direction pushed by the waves.

Exhausted, he survived the chaos and defeat.

He never thought that death would be so close to him.

Sitting on the cold speedboat, Pang Zheng looked at the late sun that was about to break through the dark clouds, and thought of his life in the past 30 years. He was full of ambition, confident that everything would go his way, and no one refuted it.

But now, he only thinks about his life in the next 30 years, being able to do what he wants, having no fear or regret, seeking benevolence and gaining benevolence, and having no complaints.

His desire for life is so urgent.

After drifting on the sea for a whole day, in addition to facing the pressure of hunger and cold, he also had to endure the panic of uncertain weather. He didn't know whether Leixi was dead or alive. During the boring waiting time, Gu Jin was the only support His strength to live.

But when he was brought back by the sea rescue team, Pang Zheng realized that if he came back alive, it was good news.

He fought desperately to survive, but she struggled to death for him.It's not a death for love, but it's even more shocking than a death for love.

Lei Xi asked Pang Zheng: "Who is she to you?"

Pang Zheng said dully, "My wife."

There is only one of her in the world, Pang Zheng's wife, her name is Gu Jin.

Another day later, at nightfall, Gu Jin woke up from a deep sleep, in a daze, not knowing where she was.

She opened her eyes, and Pang Zheng half sat on the edge of the bed, hugging her. He smelled of sea water and a faint smell of disinfectant.Gu Jin rolled her eyes and saw that his exposed arms and calves were wrapped with white gauze.

Pang Zheng lowered his gaze to meet her.

One second, two seconds, three seconds.

"I am back."

He put his arms around her, pressed her head into his arms, and repeated: "I'm back."

Gu Jin said, "I know."

Her voice was hoarse, and as soon as she opened her mouth, tears rolled out.

It was suppressed crying at first, and gradually turned into howling.She hugged him, her fingers turned white from exertion, she cried for no reason, and cried hoarsely, with the feeling of remaining alive after a catastrophe, Gu Jin once thought that she had already gone to hell.

She cried for the tenacity and fragility of life, for her loss and recovery, for her panic and hardships, and all the things in her past life.

Gu Jin sobbed in Pang Zheng's arms, shaking her head constantly: "I didn't mean it... I really didn't mean it..."

What she said was what she said to him before he left, she said that it would be better if you died, and she was blaming herself.

"I know." Pang Zheng patted her on the back, coaxing her gently.

Gu Jin was still shaking her head, crying out of breath: "I never thought of killing anyone... Really... I didn't mean to... Pang Zheng... I'm sorry, I'm really sorry..."

She cried almost to the point of collapse, incoherent.

Pang Zheng hugged her tightly, using the warmth of his body to caress her cold face, he slowly moved his hands from her back to her flat belly, feeling a sharp pain in his heart.

He kissed her forehead and said, "I know."

He has always known the self-blame and fear buried deep in Gu Jin's heart.Her sharp teeth, her persistence and stubbornness are all hidden under her bluff appearance, peeling off this layer, the inner Gu Jin is soft and kind.She never wanted to hurt anyone.

She was afraid of her father's death and the fragility of her life, and she blamed herself for the irreversible consequences caused by her impulsiveness.Like him, like Bai Ziqing, like Yin Bailu.

and also.

The scar that was deeply rooted in her heart had tortured her countless times.

Between her and him, that child who came into the world silently and then disappeared quietly.

Gu Jin will never forget that moment.

She was lying on an unfamiliar and cold operating table, with her legs held up by two nurses. A doctor who was about the same age as her mother walked in wearing gloves. After a rough inspection, she was convicted of a crime.

"Did you know you were pregnant?"

"..."

"It must be impossible to keep it, the embryo is too small."

In front of Gu Jin was a large green disinfection curtain. She couldn't see the doctor's expression, but she could hear her usual helpless tone.She opened her eyes, and the dull pain kept traveling along her limbs, she thought it was just a sign of menstruation.

(End of this chapter)