Our youth is over

Chapter 18
The two sitting by the window were talking and laughing while eating hot pot. The hot steam was lingering in the air. The girl scooped out a ball from the pot with a spoon, put it in the bowl and bit it into her mouth with chopsticks. , Juice popped out of the meatballs, probably scalding her, she opened her cherry mouth and yelled, He Yebei, who was opposite, thoughtfully gave her a napkin...

I thought if there were other girls sitting opposite He Yebei at this moment, I wouldn't be so angry, but Lu Xia was sitting opposite him.

Why is she, Lu Xia, laughing so happily when Qiqi died and I was in such a crazy state!How can she be happy!

Why can they sit and eat hot pot together!

If you think I'm unreasonable, please forgive the psychology of a mentally abnormal person. I really can't stand seeing this situation.So, stung by that blissful halo, and in a rage, I did what only a deranged person would do.

I clenched my fists, angrily picked up a pile of snow from the side of the road, wrapped it into a ball, and smashed it hard at the window glass.

Now the windows are very strong, and the snow will not be damaged at all.The snowball will only collapse on its own, just like we try our best to hurt someone, but we can only hurt ourselves.

However, the cracking of the snowball still caused the glass to vibrate. The two people who were eating hot pot inside subconsciously looked out the window, and the smiles on their faces froze immediately.

I pointed my middle finger at them, cursing like a lunatic, and I don't know if they can hear it. After cursing for a while, the waiter in the restaurant rushed out to arrest me.

Seeing this, I ran away.

Thank God for giving me a stupid head, but gave me well-developed limbs.I run very fast, even if I only wear slippers on my feet, but I can still leave the group of aunts behind me by a few kilometers when I walk barefoot without the slippers.

Feeling that there was no longer anyone chasing after me, I slowly stopped, holding my hand on the wall of the building on the street, panting violently, and then burst into laughter, spraying out tears and snot in embarrassment.

My whole body is like a huge steam oven, with hot steam bubbling all over my body, my internal organs are scalding hot, I guess I have scalded my heart, the part of my heart hurts.

The heat from my body gradually dissipated, and I collapsed and sat on the ground with my whole body collapsed. Then I hugged my knees with my hands, rested my head on them, and cried uncomfortably.

I cried and asked myself, why can they still be happy after Qiqi's death, but I can't?
Later I learned that both sadness and happiness are given by myself.

I am not happy because the man who died was my dearest friend.I can't get over it because I don't let myself go.

4
When I came home in a state of embarrassment that day, the first thing I saw when I entered the door was my mother who was going crazy with anxiety.

When my mother saw me, she stretched out her hand and slapped me unceremoniously, and shouted angrily with her eyes wide open: "Bei Yinan, what have I done to you? You want to treat your mother like this! Are you going to die of anger? I am willing to..."

I sensibly hugged my crying mother, admitted my mistake and made a promise, vowing never to do this again.

How dare my mother believe me, since that day, she hasn't gone anywhere, and has been guarding me no matter whether the tutor is there or not.When I buy vegetables on weekdays, my dad will bring them back after get off work.

I became a prisoner in prison in an instant, and my mother was the strict warden.

Almost all the things that should be made up have been made up, so my mother took me to the teachers of various subjects to do the papers.The last thing I want is to go to He Pili's house, but there is no way, who told us to teach physics next semester, the teacher has not changed, so it is difficult to find someone else.

When it came time to make an appointment with He Pili, my mother woke me up early in the morning to memorize physics formulas, and then happily sent me to He Pili's house with two large boxes of dried seafood that had been prepared earlier.

He Pili was in the garage of his home, and he started a cram school again during the winter vacation. When we arrived at his home, he was in class, but He Pili's wife was at home, and He Yebei was not. I was inexplicably relieved.

My mother laughed and put the gift on He Pili's sofa, and He's mother politely picked it up and pushed it into my mother's arms, refusing to accept it.I stood aside helplessly, watching the two of them push things back and forth, and couldn't help but yawned. When I turned my head, I saw the door of He Ye's north bedroom opened, and a teenager was standing there, staring at him. looked at me darkly.

My scalp tightened, I lowered my eyes so as not to look at He Yebei, I silently complained about my bad luck, it was not the right time.He thought that He Yebei was not at home, but he just stayed in the room and did not come out.

"Yebei, you're going downstairs. It's just right to call your dad up and say that Auntie Bei brought Bei Yinan to ask him to do the test." Mother He smiled kindly and said to He Yebei.

He Yebei said "hmm".

I didn't go to see him, so I didn't know if he was gone, so I kept my head down.It wasn't until He Pili came upstairs that I looked up and realized that He Yebei hadn't come up with his father since he went downstairs.

It would be better if he wasn't there, out of sight and out of sight.

Qiqi's death actually has nothing to do with He Yebei, but I just don't like him.Because he, like Jiang Chengrui and Lin Zhishen, only revolved around Lu Xia.

And I hate Lu Xia, if she hadn't wanted to get rid of Lin Zhishen and used Xiao Jiang selfishly, Qiqi would not have helped Xiao Jiang out of the siege and was chased by Lin Zhishen's enemies and fell downstairs to death.

Maybe Lu Xia is very pitiful. She is entangled by a demon like Lin Zhishen, and she can't show that she likes He Yebei. She even pretends to be friends with Lin Zhishen to protect He Yebei. But if I want to pity her, who pity Qiqi?
What Lin Zhishen scolded at the hospital last time was also justified. If He Yebei was brave enough to snatch Lu Xia away, would there be any entanglements later, would it be worthwhile to drag Xiao Jiang and us into it?

During this period of time, I have been thinking that if He Yebei and Lu Xia got together from the beginning, there would be no tragedy.But seeing the two of them eating hot pot happily that day, I was upset again, and I didn't want them to be together at all.

Qiqi is dead, how can they be happy together.

Later, I gradually understood that I didn't want He Yebei and Lu Xia to be together, not because Qi Qi died, I wanted them to be unhappy.

Qiqi's death was just an excuse I made for myself. To put it bluntly, it was actually my own jealousy.I am jealous of Lu Xia, she is liked by so many people, I am jealous, because He Yebei, who I like, also likes her.

Everything in the world has its own destiny.What is yours is yours, what is not yours is not yours, no matter how jealous you are, no matter how desperate you are to grab it, it is not yours.

If you like it early, how can you not like you at the beginning and then fall in love with you with all your heart?

I'm just stupid, so it wasn't until I was hurt badly that I realized that He Yebei never belonged to Bei Yinan, even if we were together, even if I thought we liked each other.

5
He Pili is He Pili. Unlike other teachers, he has always adhered to a serious style. Like this kind of informal test, other teachers have let go of the water, and he is the only one who wrings his temper, and the paper is still very difficult.

I was locked up alone in the small empty room of He Pili's house, and the voices of my mother talking softly with He's mother could be heard outside from time to time.

Although the voice of the conversation has been deliberately lowered, I am feeling irritable at the moment, even the softest voice is uncomfortable to hear, and I am impatient to do the paper seriously.

I stayed in the empty room for an hour and a half, during which He Pili came in to see me a few times, and left after turning around a few times with his hands behind his back.

I did all the questions I knew how to do, and made a random list of a few formulas for the ones I couldn't do. Then I couldn't sit still anymore, got up and went out to find He Pili to hand in the papers.

I knew in my heart that this paper was a mess, and I was afraid that He Pili would scold me while correcting my paper, so as soon as the paper was handed over to He Pili, I immediately made an excuse to say that I didn't have enough breakfast and asked for help. Go to the convenience store in the neighborhood to buy food.

Mother He called me to stop enthusiastically, took out sliced ​​bread and milk from the refrigerator and asked me if I wanted to eat.

My mother stood aside in embarrassment and said, "It's embarrassing, let her go buy and eat." She stared at me dissatisfiedly while talking, and said sharply, "You can't make me less trouble."

I ignored my mother, and when I saw He Pili coming over with a red pen, sitting back on the sofa with my paper ready to correct, I turned around and ran out.

When I got out of the elevator, I didn't expect to meet He Yebei at the entrance of the corridor.

At that time, the boy was squatting on the ground with his knees bent, holding a piece of ham sausage in his hand, breaking the ham sausage into cubes and throwing it on the ground with his light-white long fingers. A white Samoyed was turning around in front of him. From time to time, there are two barking sounds.

Originally, he fed his dog and I walked my way. He Yebei didn't notice me coming down, and I didn't have to take the initiative to say hello and ask for attention or something, but sometimes people get crazy, and their behavior is not controlled by the brain.

I thought in my mind not to cause trouble, but I somehow raised my leg, stretched it forward, and kicked He Yebei's squatting buttocks.

Then, after I realized what stupid thing I had done, He Yebei had already jumped towards the ground in front of him, scaring the Samoyed into barking wildly.

I couldn't bear to see He Yebei's miserable face hit the concrete floor and scratched his skin, so I immediately covered his face with both hands, but after waiting for a while, I didn't hear He Yebei's screams.I slowly opened my hands in amazement, and looked towards He Yebei through my fingers, and saw the young man standing aside with a sullen expression, staring at me with a bad expression, and said through gritted teeth, "Bei Yinan, what are you doing?" ?”

"I didn't see you, so I accidentally kicked your ass." I lied and replied without blushing.

He Yebei stared at me, his teeth itching with hatred, but he didn't speak again.

Seeing that he didn't yell at me, I wondered if I could get away now, so I turned around and prepared to run, but just as I moved away, someone grabbed the hat of the down jacket, and I looked back at him in a daze. He Yebei who came around behind me.

"Okay, it's my fault, I apologize to you. Let go of me, don't grab my hat, or my mother will scold me again when she sees the wrinkle." I apologized voluntarily.

He Yebei let go of his hand, with his arms hanging aside, he stood upright in front of me, his thin pink lips moved, as if he wanted to say something to me, but he just didn't know how to say it.

I sneaked a glance at him, and saw that his little face was still fair and clean, without any damage, and I felt a sense of boredom in my heart.

Did this person not fall, or was he lucky that he didn't scratch his face?

He Yebei glanced at me, and his face gradually softened. When he thought I hadn't seen it, he took a peek at me, and then suddenly said inexplicably, "You, um, how are you doing recently?"

I looked at him in bewilderment, wondering what he wanted to say to me.

He Yebei suddenly took a breath, mustered up the courage to look up at me, and continued: "My dad said that you have been on vacation for a long time because of your health, have you recovered now?"

After a long time of trouble, it turned out that he was concerned about me!
If I had to change this to the past, when Qiqi was still around, I would have been overjoyed when he took the initiative to care about me, but now it sounds inexplicably ironic to me.

The news of my suspension of classes for nearly two months has been widely circulated in the school. At the beginning, my mother told the school teacher that I was ill. She took the hospital certificate and showed it to the school. I hope the school will not reveal the specific illness I have. After all, depression, to put it bluntly, is a type of neurosis!

But not long after, the whole school knew that I had a mental problem, and the neighbors and relatives around me often talked about me behind my back, sighing, sympathizing with sympathy, and they must have said a lot of emotion, "That's the old Bei's house." Girl, it's a pity that I got that kind of problem."

So, to say so much is nothing more than to explain one point. Since He Yebei knew that I was sick and suspended classes, how could he not know that I had a neurological problem.

Just last time I saw him eating with Lu Xia on the street, throwing a snowball and running away, plus I just kicked his ass, he didn't get too angry, he must have been fussy before, now pointing out Maybe he was thinking "Renbei Yinan has a brain problem, I have to understand her, don't argue with her" and other generous words.

I hooked my lips and chuckled, and approached He Yebei step by step nervously. He Yebei was forced to the wall by me, with his back against the wall, his hands clenched nervously, and he looked at me with constricted breathing.

I looked at him sarcastically, and smiled lowly: "He Yebei, what are you pretending to be? Just ask me if I'm crazy, and ask around the corner. You suddenly care about me so much because you are afraid that I will be like someone in a TV series. It's like a neuropathy, you're crazy and still pester you. Forget it, don't worry, I'm not interested in you anymore. I hit you with snowballs on the street that day, just because I couldn't see Lu Xia's happiness. "

He Yebei looked at me with a pale face, his eyes suddenly dimmed, and suddenly he pushed me away angrily, pointed at me and said bitterly: "Bei Yinan, I knew you were playing, say What you like, what you say is responsible, it's all on a whim, you...don't dangle in front of my eyes."

I stared at the furious He Yebei in amazement, wiped the saliva that was sprayed on my face, shook my hands in disgust, and snorted contemptuously: "Don't mention liking to me, what's the use of liking, Qiqi is so I like Jiang Chengrui, but I can't compare to a Lu Xia who takes advantage of people's feelings. He was left like this, and left so pitifully. I broke up with Jiang Chengrui, and I suffered from depression. No more burdens, no need to worry about being threatened anymore, I can have a happy hot pot with you and love each other. Why are the three of us so miserable, you and her can still be so happy!"

"What do you like, it's funny, I like you, you don't like me, what's so fun about this kind of game."

I also sprayed the saliva star on He Yebei's face, and the man stood there without saying a word, looking at me hesitantly, his eyes were actually very sad, seeing my expression hurt, it must be my eyesight .

After arguing with someone for a while, it was exhausting and exhausting. I was really hungry, so I stopped talking to He Yebei, shook my head and was about to leave, but was stopped by someone again.

I looked impatiently at the hand that was suddenly held by He Yebei, then raised my head and stared at him, and said in a bad tone: "Don't try to explain to Lu Xia, Lin Zhishen, Xiao Jiang, or yourself, I don't want to hear it at all. .”

He Yebei was stopped by what I said, and was blocked when he was about to speak, but his hand was still pulling my wrist vigorously.

It was the first time that I found this person annoying, and was about to walk away when I heard brisk footsteps not far away, and a girl panting excitedly, laughing and shouting: "Yebei, Tingwei can't move anymore , come and play badminton with me!"

I'm too sensitive to this voice, when I hear it, my nerves tense up, my heart ignites, and my brain doesn't think about it, I was about to shake off He Yebei, but I grabbed his hand tightly enough with my backhand, turned around and rushed In the past, gave someone a big bear hug.

No matter how He Yebei pushed or frowned, I just hugged him and didn't let go, staring straight at Lu Xia who was stunned at the entrance of the corridor.

Without looking in the mirror, I can see the extremely arrogant expression on my face from Lu Xia's clear pupils, as well as He Yebei who was trampled by me and stopped struggling in my arms.

Lu Xia's smile froze on her face, she twitched the corner of her mouth in embarrassment and said, "Xiao Bei, long time no see."

While hugging He Yebei, I thought about what to say to hurt Lu Xia, so as to calm the anger in my heart and vent my anger for Qi Qi.But think about it again, what else can I say, I hugged He Yebei so intimately, no matter how calm Lu Xia pretended to be on her face, it must be a pain in her heart, and I want to make her feel more uncomfortable. Let's forget about kissing He Yebei directly.

Thinking of this, I turned my gaze back, raised my head and stared at He Yebei's tender lips like a wolf, squinted my eyes subconsciously, and was engaged in a fierce ideological struggle in my heart.

To kiss or not to kiss, this is a very serious question.

"Bei Yinan, let go."

I'm still thinking about it, He Yebei is already impatient, and has worn away all the remaining patience for "psychosis", and is struggling again, blushing and telling me to let go.

How could I let him escape? Let Lu Xia read a joke. Immediately, my heart swelled, I stretched my neck, and I was about to put my mouth in it. Then I heard the elevator ding, and a gloomy soprano sounded from the corridor entrance. .

"Bei Yinan, please stop!"

As soon as I turned around, I saw my mother standing aside blushing, pointing at me and calling me to let go of He Yebei. She looked at me like she was looking at a female hooligan.

My whole body deflated like a deflated rubber ball. Before I could let go, my mother dragged me over, and I was caught in the elevator with my ears in my hands. I could only watch sadly and then stood back to He Ye. Lu Xia, who was beside Bei, looked at my mother embarrassedly apologizing to He Yebei, and He Yebei's eyes that looked at me as if he was "crazy", and felt a hatred in his heart!
I think my mother had a big misunderstanding about my behavior just now. She must have regarded me as a slut in her heart, thinking that if she hadn't appeared in time, Teacher He's son would be humiliated by me.

Because of giving birth to such an embarrassing daughter like me, my mother always looked guilty when she saw He Pili later.

Even when He Pili took my paper that was changed beyond recognition by the red pen but still gave me a passing grade and lectured to me, she criticized me even more fiercely than He Pili.

As if criticizing my IQ would improve my personality.

(End of this chapter)