Our youth is over

Chapter 27 I admit defeat (1)
"Many times, people grow too slowly, mature too late, and many things reach the point of no return, and we realize how outrageous our mistakes were at the beginning. At that time, there is nothing we can do except regret."

1
Ding Dong lay silently in the dormitory for two days, and in the end he went looking for another place unwilling to give up. He didn't return to the dormitory for several nights. Xu Xu pointed at Ding Dong's empty bed and cursed: "What is a cheap, this is a cheap! Paste it Your love is not worth it!"

The graduation party was scheduled for June [-]th. Xu Xu was a key member of the student union and was very busy every day.Sometimes it is said that she is a junior, who will be promoted to senior after the summer vacation, and an old senior who wants to quit the student union. It's not her turn, what can she do with such enthusiasm.Xu Xu scolded me back, humming: "Am I such a vulgar person! Do I only do things for profit! I am purely a hobby. The External Relations Department can improve eloquence and interpersonal relationships. Our senior year I'm about to find an internship, and these will help in the future. You said that besides studying all day long, why does Xiaoying take so many certificates? Isn't it also for future development? Old Bei, I'm not talking about you, you should also be a little self-motivated , in addition to eating, drinking, playing and sleeping, do some practical things, otherwise it will be difficult to find a job after graduation."

I don't like to listen to Xu Xu's preaching. Every time she talks about teaching in a serious way, it's endless.But this point is also very similar to Qiqi, once Qiqi takes advantage of it, she loses words for a long time.Xuxu's personality, temperament, dressing preferences, etc. are very similar to Qiqi. Looking at her, I can always find Qiqi's shadow. If Qiqi hadn't left, she might be in college now. No matter how bad it is, she looks like me and Xiao Jiang In the same way, if you repeat a few times, you can still go to the junior college.All in all, I can enjoy this great time, full of youth.

Thinking of the past always makes me sad.Xu Xu came out of the bathroom after taking a shower, blowing his hair with a hair dryer without dislike the heat, tilting his head and said, "Lao Bei, accompany me to the mall to buy clothes later! I have to wear them on the graduation party!"

Xu Xu, like Qiqi, is very beautiful.In our engineering university, there are more boys than girls, and there are even fewer beautiful girls, and there are very few extremely beautiful girls like Xuxu.She is the flower of our college, the face of the School of Economics, and the host of this graduation party, so she needs an evening dress.

Originally, these dresses were prepared by the school, and there was no need to buy them by myself, but Xu Xu was not used to wearing clothes worn by others. Even if those clothes had been washed with disinfectant, she was not short of money, so she just wanted to buy new ones.

In summer, N city was as hot as a stove, I didn't want to go out at all, but Xu Xu held up his finger and promised me to eat whatever I wanted in a day, so I was tempted.You know, I've been very upset about eating recently, I can't eat what I want, and my stomach is very wronged.

When I was a freshman and sophomore, when it came to buying clothes, everyone liked to go to small shops where you could bargain, and few people went to shopping malls like Wanda.Sometimes it's not that I don't have money, but I like the feeling of shopping with a group of people and bargaining with a group of people, which is very real and happy.Three, three, four, age, and various factors such as job hunting needs, internship interviews, etc., girls gradually love to dress up, and start to pay attention to the quality of life. They also like to go to the mall when buying clothes, choose the right clothes, and match what they should have temperament.The shopping mall is full of cosmetics, bags, and various branded clothing that girls love...

When I was in high school, I had nothing to do on weekends, and I also loved shopping, but when I went to college, after my body changed seriously, I didn’t like to buy clothes anymore.In summer, I wear a big T-shirt with fat beach pants, stepping on a pair of flip flops like a man, and I am happy and comfortable.Walking with Xu Xu, who is dressed in fashion, is a stark contrast, free green leaves.

I went to a local university, and the shopping mall Xu Xu visited was the Wanda that I used to visit in high school. We walked around on the first floor, but Xu Xu couldn’t find any clothes he was satisfied with. It was already noon, so Xu Xu went to Take me to dinner.

The Taiwanese Seafood Restaurant on the third floor of Wanda, every time I go there, nine out of ten times I will eat there. It is really delicious and the price is moderate.On the way, Xuxu and I chatted about a time when I came here to eat with my friends in high school. I was not fat at the time, and I ate less. My friend finished eating his own. Seeing that I had half a bowl of rice left, I thought it was a waste, so I just took it and ate it. I really don't dislike it, mainly because the food is so delicious.

Xu Xu said, "Your friend is Jiang Chengrui, right?"

I smiled and didn't reply, it was my default, but I had a name in my heart, at that time only He Yebei was willing to eat my leftovers!

"Jiang Chengrui?"

Xu Xu just said Xiao Jiang's name in the first sentence, and then screamed again in the last sentence. I was wondering why she was so surprised, so I subconsciously followed her line of sight and saw Xiao Jiang and his daughter. My friend Shu Lei is sitting in front of the seafood shop waiting for a seat.Because the business is so good, it is rare to meet a vacant seat when you go there to eat, and most of them need to get a sign and wait.

There were obviously still seats around, but Shu Lei was sitting on Xiao Jiang's lap, looking down and playing with her mobile phone.Xu Xu said, this is called the fun between men and women.

Hearing someone calling his name, Jiang Chengrui raised his head from Shu Lei's shawl-length hair, and looked at us in a dazed way. His eyes suddenly lit up, and he hugged Shu Lei from his lap, and walked over with a playful smile. He said: "Xiao Bei, why didn't you tell me earlier when you came here for dinner, if I knew you were coming, Shu Lei and I would have a table for four."

"It's not too late now, you go and change the table for four, you treat me!" Before I said anything, Xu Xu turned back with a smug face.

Xiao Jiang stretched out her fist and pointed at Xu Xu jokingly. Xu Xu was not afraid, and pushed his shoulder carelessly to let him change seats with the waiter. Shu Lei, who was sitting on the waiting chair, looked a little stiff.

Shu Lei is a well-known beauty in our University of Technology. She and Xiao Jiang are both from the Department of Power Engineering, and they are not in the same institute as us.Jiang Chengrui immediately fell in love with Shu Lei when he first entered the university, but Shu Lei is notoriously hard to chase. At that time, she had a boyfriend whom she had been dating since high school, and she was in a long-distance relationship.Xiao Jiang is indeed a bit of a scumbag, he likes pure girls, but he has an advantage that he doesn't steal other people's girlfriends, so he gave up when he knew that Shu Lei had an owner, and fell in love with a girl from his neighbor.Later, Shu Lei broke up with her ex-boyfriend, and Xiao Jiang also broke up with her girlfriend at that time, so he went after Shu Lei again, and it took him a long time to catch her.

Every time Jiang Chengrui falls in love, his girlfriend will show it to me.He is my best buddy, but on the surface I wish him to be affectionate with others, but I honestly don’t like his girlfriends, even Shu Lei, who looks like Liu Yifei in the pure age in everyone’s eyes, because Qi Qi has always been in my heart.

Qi Qi and Xiao Jiang got into that situation, and I always have regrets in my heart.I also know that this is unfair to Jiang Chengrui. Whoever he likes is his freedom. When Qiqi is here, I can't force him to like Qiqi. When Qiqi is gone, I can't let him not forget Qiqi, forget his youth When he was young, there was a girl who liked him so much.

So even if I don't like Shu Lei in my heart, I won't show it.

2
After eating together, Xu Xu wanted to continue shopping for clothes. Xiao Jiang joined in the fun and said that he wanted to see if the turkey-like Xu Xu would turn into a phoenix in a dress, and was kicked by Xu Xu.

Shu Lei stood beside him, looking at us in embarrassment, and while Xiao Jiang was speaking, she secretly reached out and pulled Jiang Chengrui's hand, signaling him not to do this, but Xiao Jiang's lack of wink is no longer a matter of a day or two. Shu Lei didn't want to go shopping with us, so she just dragged her to follow us.Along the way, Shu Lei's face was very ugly.

In the end, Xu Xu entered a store, perhaps because of her own destiny, that store was the one where I bought her a white dress for Qi Qi's birthday the year she left.As soon as Xu Xu went in, she looked for a red skirt. Like Qiqi, she liked bright red, and felt that red was warm and warm like fire.But after trying on red dresses from many stores, she didn't think they looked good enough, and this one was no different.

Xiao Jiang, who followed in, took a white skirt from the shelf to Xu Xu, and motioned her to wear it.Xu Xu said he didn't like to wear white dresses, but Jiang Chengrui pushed him into the dressing room as soon as he finished speaking.

I worriedly glanced at Shu Lei, who was standing at the door and hadn't come in. Her face was as white as a piece of paper, her lips were tightly pressed, and she was trying to restrain her emotions.

Although I don't like her very much, I think Xiao Jiang is going too far at the moment.Shu Lei is his girlfriend at the moment, it's really hurtful that he doesn't care about her feelings at all.

"I'm going to buy a drink." As if she didn't want to stay in this space for another second, Shu Lei suddenly said, Xiao Jiang probably didn't hear it, she didn't get a response, and left in frustration.

I stepped forward and pulled Jiang Chengrui's arm, Xiao Jiang turned his head to look at me, and asked inexplicably, "Why are you pulling me?"

"Go and see Shu Lei, she doesn't seem very happy, she's going that way." I pointed to the direction where Shu Lei left.

Xiao Jiang said "Oh" blankly, turned around and chased after him.I breathed a sigh of relief, and asked myself, Bei Yinan, you don't like Shu Lei and Xiao Jiang together, why would you help her?I already have the answer in my heart, Qiqi is gone, whoever is with Jiang Chengrui, to me, there is actually no difference, the key depends on Jiang Chengrui, who is he pretending in his heart.

"Babe, what do you think of my clothes?"

Xu Xu's voice came from behind me, I looked back at Xu Xu who came out of the dressing room, holding the hem of the skirt awkwardly, suddenly lost my soul, lost my eyes, and wet my eyes.

When I was 17 years old, I bought a white dress and planned to give it to Qiqi. I happily imagined in my mind what Qiqi, who likes red makeup, would look like in this fairy-like white dress, whether she would look like a fairy Pure and moving, stunning to live in time, beautiful in years.Now when Xu Xu appeared in front of me wearing a white dress, the regrets that lingered in my youth were finally satisfied.Yes, Qiqi wearing a white dress will definitely be like Xu Xu now, like an angel descending from the other side of the clouds, exuding holy light all over her body, smiling frequently, revealing indescribable beauty.

I turned my head away in a panic, afraid that Xuxu would see the tears in my eyes, and wiped the corners of my eyes with my hands. When I looked up again to look at Xuxu, I glanced at the door of the store inadvertently, and found that Xiao Jiang who had gone and returned was shocked Standing there awkwardly, looking at Xu Xu who was smiling cautiously, his eyes turned red.

At that moment, I saw the pain in Jiang Chengrui's eyes, which I had never seen before. Those eyes were deeply shocked, astonished, enlightened, and regretful...

"What's wrong? Am I not dressed well? You all have weird expressions." Xu Xu, who didn't know the situation, looked at us uneasily and asked in surprise.

My throat was tight, and I couldn't speak for a while, I just stared blankly at Jiang Chengrui who was poking at the door, bumped away Shu Lei who was following, and ran away like a gust of wind.

I seem to have guessed something, but I'm not sure.Until the evening, Xiao Jiang called me and told me to go to the hillside behind the school education supermarket. I looked at my friend who grew up with me, drank one can of beer in depression, and stood staggeringly under the twilight , the tears in his eyes were as bright as the stars in the dark night.

With tears in his eyes, he said to me: "Xiao Bei, I just found out today that I actually like Qi Qinghan. I just suddenly realized today how unbearable it is for me to leave her. I actually found love from a strange girl. Seeing her shadow, I now know why when I met your roommates, no one would quarrel, but I always quarreled with Mo Xulu, and I never got angry, but felt happy instead. That was because Qi Qing and I used to Han is like this. I always say that I don’t like her, and after talking for a long time, I also feel that I really don’t like her. But when I saw Mo Xulu coming out in a white dress today, I had a thought in my mind. Pureness can be framed by clothes. If Qi Qinghan wears a white dress without heavy makeup, will she be so beautiful and refined? It's a pity that I will never see her in a white dress. Thinking of this, I feel a pain in my chest I can't stand it. Because I found out that I actually like Qiqi, and I keep calling her bad, not learning to be good, not pure, but if someone doesn't care, why do I always care about her behavior and clothing details. I just know it too late. It took a while to realize who the person I really liked was, but it was too late, and she was gone. Xiaobei, brother really knew that I was wrong, what should I do, I don't even have a chance to admit my mistake to her. "

Many times, people grow too slowly, mature too late, and many things have reached the point of no return, and we realize how outrageous our mistakes were at the beginning. At that time, there is nothing we can do except regret.

Xiao Jiang seemed to have been drained of all her strength, and knelt down on the wet and cold mountain ground, holding my legs with both hands, and buried her face between my legs, crying bitterly.I let him lean on me, looking up at the dark blue sky, I couldn't stop my tears.

Qiqi, did you hear that?The boy you've loved so desperately has finally said he loves you, it's just too late.Forgive him, forgive him for being young and frivolous, not knowing what true love is, forgive him for being too late to respond to your love in time.

forgive him...

If time can be turned back, we can go back to the past. No matter what, I will definitely watch him not to fall in love with Lu Xia by mistake, and continue to watch you quarrel and entangle every day. After five years, the boy will gradually transform into a mature man , and then listen to him say to you in person: Qi Qinghan, I like you.

This time, I can only help you listen.

3
Ding Dong, who disappeared for a few days, finally returned to the dormitory with a haggard look on his face.After coming back, she has been lying on the bed, not mentioning anything, not going to class, not eating, and in the end Xu Xu couldn't stand it anymore, she just pulled her up from the bed and forced her to eat, mouth Li scolded: "I hate girls like you the most. They want to die and live for a man. Those who really love you will not let you look like this and ignore you. Those who don't love you enough will not feel sorry for you even if you die. .”

Ding Dong was scolded by Xu Xu so much that he hugged her and wept bitterly, saying: "Xu Xu, I'm sorry for you, I should have known that he is the kind of irresponsible person, I would never have been with him behind your back. I'd rather have your friendship than his love. I was wrong, I was wrong."

Xu Xu patted Ding Dong who was crying so hard, his eyes turned red, and although his tone was still hard, it was obviously more distressed.

"It's not irresponsible, it's that there are too few men in this world who can really take responsibility, let alone our age, when we are young, and our minds are full of thoughts about the colorful world, how can we pretend to be responsible? Don't think about it, it's not too late to want friendship instead of love, you still have me in nowhere! There is also Lao Bei and little shadow! You are not ugly, so you are afraid that you will not find a man in the future! "

I couldn't bear to watch this kind of scene, so I simply turned my head away and blinked at the scenery outside the window.

Xu Xu is right, sometimes the person in love cannot bear the responsibilities that love should have. It is better to say that we are too young when we love. Young people can pretend to have dreams and ambitions in their hearts, but seldom can pretend responsible.

At the beginning, He Yebei said that Bei Yinan said that he had to be responsible for liking, but what happened in the end?He Yebei, who kept talking about the responsibility, finally couldn't bear the responsibility of liking someone, became a filial son, and left the country without saying a word.

On the day of the senior year's graduation party, other students were supposed to be required to attend the ceremony, but according to the practice in previous years, they were free to choose whether to go or not. Many people who went also watched a few shows, and left after they felt bored up.There are also those who stayed until the end, infected by the sentimental atmosphere of graduation, came back full of emotions, and shed tears emotionally.

Xu Xu was the host of the party that night and had to be there. Little Shadow was still busy with her studies and stayed in the postgraduate entrance examination classroom for self-study. Ding Dong didn't go because she was afraid of getting hurt. I didn't like to watch that kind of excitement, so I simply stayed with Ding Dong in the dormitory.Later, Ding Dong said that it would be better for the two of them to stay in the dormitory and go out to play, so they left the school gate and took a car to Wanda directly to watch a movie.

Just in time for "That Little Thing of First Love" was still in release, many students around watched it as soon as it was released, and most of them said it was good-looking, touching, the male lead is super handsome, senior Ah Liang...

Ding Dong and I each bought tickets at a half discount with our student ID cards to enter the arena. We just wanted to take a look at it casually, but we didn't expect that both of us had snot and tears on our faces.It's not how touching the plot really is, but the many clips that resonate with us and remind us of our first love.There are too many sorrows and sorrows that can't be told on weekdays, so I used the movie to cry bitterly, and when I look back, I can only say that the movie made us cry, and I will never tear up the wound of first love and talk about it.

After coming out of the movie theater, Ding Dong was going to the bathroom, I sat on a chair in the corridor outside and waited for her.Time passed by every minute, but Ding Dong didn't come out for a long time. When I thought she was in the tuba, I just took my mobile phone to amuse myself, and the sound of women screaming came from the direction of the bathroom.

Although I didn't hear the sound of Ding Dong, I instinctively had a bad premonition, stood up from the chair, ran to the bathroom in a panic and looked inside, and saw Ding Dong lying on the ground with a pale face, eyes open, His mouth was opened weakly, and blood kept oozing out from under his body.The woman next to her had a frightened expression on her face, she was startled and just shouted "Help" but no one reached out to help her up.

"Old Bei..." Seeing me, Ding Dong called me weakly.

I responded tremblingly, squatted down, lifted her upper body from the dirty ground with trembling hands, and let her head rest on my arms. It was a mess, and I only knew to call 120 with my mobile phone.

"Old Bei, I seem to have a miscarriage. I'm pregnant with a child from somewhere. I just found out in the past few days. I haven't dared to tell you..." Ding Dong cried while holding my arm.

I hugged her tightly, told her not to talk, her eyes were so painful that she couldn't open her eyes, I just pressed her head hard against my chest, and chattered: "It's okay, it's okay, don't be afraid, don't be afraid... ..."

(End of this chapter)