Our youth is over

Chapter 28 I admit defeat (2)
I don't know if it's okay, Ding Dong, or it's okay, Bei Yinan, and I don't know whether to tell Ding Dong not to be afraid, or to let me not be afraid.Reality and memory merged together, and I seemed to have returned to the days when I was wandering alone in a foreign country, looking for that person with the address of He Yebei Exchange High School I checked online.Not only did I not find it, but an accident happened, and I was lying on the cold ground covered in blood. I was sent to a strange hospital for emergency treatment by a group of foreigners who spoke English that I could not understand. I was so scared that I kept crying and calling He Ye. Bei's name, calling my parents to save me, calling Xiao Jiang brother to come and save Xiaobei...save Xiaobei's child...

That year, I made the first big irreparable mistake in my life. When I fell in love with He Yebei, I couldn't help but ate the forbidden fruit.In the first month after He Yebei left, my "big aunt" didn't come to panic. I secretly bought a pregnancy test stick for a checkup. When I found out that I was pregnant, I was so scared that I didn't dare to let my parents know. They beat me and scolded me, and they were afraid that the big belly would not be able to cover it up, so they ate desperately, trying to make themselves fat and cover up the big belly.Two months into my pregnancy, I started to have morning sickness. My mother thought I was sick and wanted to take me to the hospital. I made excuses to procrastinate, and urged Xiao Jiang, who had just been discharged from the hospital, to help me get a visa for going abroad. I wanted to find He Yebei.

Before my mother took me to the hospital for an examination, I got the visa to go abroad from Xiao Jiang, stole the money from the family, and went to the airport with Xiao Jiang.Before getting on the plane, I was discovered by my family. Xiao Jiang asked me to go first, but he held my dad and them back, so I went to the United States to find He Yebei by myself.

When I'm unlucky, I can get stuck in my teeth when I drink water.As soon as I arrived in the United States, I met a thief. My wallet and mobile phone were stolen. I had to ask someone with the photo of He Yebei’s school. I just wanted to find He Yebei. He would not ignore me when he saw me like this of.

With the help of kind local residents, I found the high school, but He Yebei was not at the school.Asked his classmate to ask for his home address, took the money from a kind-hearted person and took the car to his home. Before getting out of the car, he saw Lu Xia who hadn't seen him for a long time downstairs.

At that moment, the whole person felt as if he had been stabbed severely, and he was so painful that he couldn't breathe, and a voice in his heart said repeatedly: "Bei Yinan, He Yebei left you, so he came to the United States to be with Lu Xia. "So I lost the courage to get out of the car in an instant, and just urged the driver to drive away.

The driver spoke to me in English, and I struggled to talk in broken English until I stopped saying a word.Eventually the driver who didn't know where I was going dropped me off, and I wandered the streets aimlessly like a ghost.There was an indescribable pain all over the body, and the most painful thing was the heart, as if it was torn.

I don't know when I fell to the ground, but I just remember that I was lying on the ground like a corpse, with blood flowing out from under my body.I have been running around since I got off the plane, struggled when I met a thief, got kicked a few times, and my spirit was stimulated again. Various factors led to the loss of my child who had not been well protected.

I lay in a strange hospital in the United States, and shed all the tears I had that year.

The next day, my parents chased me to the United States, looked at me with heartbroken eyes and said, "Xiao Bei is not afraid, Mom and Dad are here."

Xiaobei is not afraid... Then she is really not afraid of anything...

After returning to China, no one mentioned the matter of the child, and no one mentioned He Yebei again.

My mother said that when people are young, they will make some mistakes when they are ignorant. I just made a mistake. I have been pregnant with other people's children by mistake, and I can still be a good girl.

But the physical trauma can be recuperated slowly, but the psychological trauma can't heal anyway.After returning from the United States, I suffered from binge eating disorder. It has been five years and I have not recovered from this disease.

Not only the disease, but also the fear of blood and the hospital could not be eradicated.

What should I do to save the intact Bei Yinan from five years ago, so that she will not perish with her youth...

4
Ding Dong was sent to the emergency room for emergency treatment. I squatted bloodied on the blue bench in the cold corridor, with my hands wrapped around my knees, my head resting between my knees, and my back tremblingly waiting for Xu Xu and the others to arrive.

Xu Xu came with Xiao Jiang, and it was me who called.

As soon as Xu Xu rushed over, he patted my trembling shoulder and said comfortingly: "Old Bei, it's all right. I'm here. How is Ding Dong doing now?"

My mind was in chaos, I couldn't answer her question, I just looked at her blankly, then passed through her hairline and landed on Jiang Chengrui behind her, touching the distressed look in those dark eyes, my heart All the suppressed emotions surged up in an instant.

"Brother, brother, help me, I'm going to die!"

I stretched out my hand towards Jiang Chengrui, and Xiao Jiang rushed over and hugged me, who was almost twice his size, into his arms, resting my chin on top of my head, soothing me in a rare whisper: "Xiao Bei, brother is here, Brother is here! Xiao Bei, don’t be afraid! Brother Xiao Jiang will never leave Xiao Bei alone again.”

Like my mother telling nursery rhymes when I was young, Xiao Jiang kept repeating this sentence softly in my ear.Xu Xu, who didn't know the truth, looked at us in amazement, as if he didn't understand why I was so abnormal all of a sudden.

I gradually fell asleep crying in Xiao Jiang's arms, and vaguely heard the door of the emergency room open, Xu Xu called Ding Dong's name, Xiao Jiang talked to Xu Xu, and asked her to accompany Ding Dong to the ward first, and he watch me for a while.I didn't sleep very soundly, but I didn't want to open my eyes. The surrounding was quiet for a while, and soon it became noisy. How can there be such a long period of silence in a place like the emergency room? This patient was pushed out, and soon, there were other emergencies people were pushed in.

Xiao Jiang seemed to be afraid of disturbing me, so he carefully put my head on his arm, and then he didn't know where his strength came from. He was only 130 kilograms, but he picked up such a fat me, and walked forward slowly .

"Xiaobei, my brother knows that you are not asleep. When you encounter this kind of thing, I know that you must be thinking wildly in your mind. How could you be able to sleep. But if you want to just close your eyes without talking, brother, I will I'll take you home, let's go home to recuperate for a few days just in time to meet Mom and Dad. By the time you want to open your eyes, I will definitely have brought you home."

I didn't answer, but subconsciously tightened the hands around Jiang Chengrui's neck.

As soon as I arrived at my house, Xiao Jiang hugged me and walked to the bedroom. As soon as I put me on the bed, I immediately opened my eyes and turned over, covered myself with the air conditioner, and curled up to breathe.As soon as my mother walked in, she worriedly grabbed Xiao Jiang and asked what was going on.Jiang Chengrui took her out of my bedroom and explained to her in detail. I heard my mother crying and saying, "When will this silly child come out?"

I hid under the quilt and cried again.I also want to step out, I really want to, and I am working hard to get out, but five years is not enough.What's even more sad is that He Yebei, who brought me such pain, has not yet escaped from the haze of youth, but he has returned.God really played a big joke on me.

After staying at home for a few days, my mood gradually improved.No matter how life makes us cry, we can't let it go, since we don't want to die, we should live well.Naturally, I didn't want to die, so I forced myself to forget about those unhappy things, cheer up, and prepare for the upcoming final exam.On the first day I came to university, my mother told me: "I don't ask you to give me how many points in the exam, how many certificates to get me, just a little, and I don't fail any subjects. I must get my graduation certificate and degree certificate."

I don’t have the pressure of a scholarship, and I don’t want to stand out among my classmates. I just want to pass the final exam. Every time I review the final exam, I go to the exam room. I don’t want to compete with others. A small calculation of luck, all the way to the present.

Hearing that I offered to go back to school, the big rock hanging in Xiao Jiang's heart finally fell, and he came to my house excitedly to pick me up, saying "I brought back people, so I should take them back." If you please my mother, she can easily abduct me.In the taxi, someone saw that I was alive and kicking, and then I became cheap again a few days ago, and asked me for money, saying that I frightened him and wanted compensation for mental damage. He completely lost the good brother who hugged people and talked softly before.

Of course I rewarded him with a few chestnuts "as he wished", and he also smiled cheerfully and put his arms around my shoulders affectionately. Suddenly his tone became sad, and he said with emotion: "Xiao Bei, If you look like this, brother will feel more at ease."

The tip of my nose couldn't help turning sour, and I called out affectionately, "Brother Jiang", the old Jiang was addicted to listening, moved his head to my mouth, pointed to his ear and urged: "Shout again and listen!"

"Go to hell! Haha."

"Xiao Bei, you treat me like this! My brother treats you just like me! Hurry up and shout again, or I will get angry!"

"Mister, take a look!"

"That's it! Woohoo!"

"It's not embarrassing to pretend to cry when you're an adult!"

"It's a shame for you, you're still in the hospital calling Brother Jiang to hug you when you're over 20!"

"Tch! It's not me anyway." I said cheekily.

The little Jiang smiled indifferently, and echoed: "Yes, it's not you, it's Bei Yinan."

"Bei Yinan is me!"

"Yes, Bei Yinan is you! Ouch! My fat sister Bei!"

5
When I went back, I saw Ding Dong who had been discharged from the hospital. With Xu Xu's care and guidance, her mood seemed to be okay, but her face was still very haggard.We didn't mention those unhappy things, avoided poking our own wounds, and focused on the exam.

In the second semester of my junior year, I will take five exams, two of which are electives and only papers are due, and the other three are professional courses. One is open-book, and the other is very detailed. There is no pressure, because the teacher's grades have always been high. He also taught us a major elective course in the sophomore year, and the whole class passed with a high score of [-].

When I came out of the examination room, I was refreshed, but was suddenly called to the office by the trainee counselor Yao Qianyu and He Yebei’s new girlfriend. Xu Xu worriedly went with me, and secretly asked me if I would be because of He Yebei’s matter. .

I don't know how she managed to make Xiao Jiang trust her so much that she let her hear all my secrets, big and small, that I didn't tell.Xu Xu was also doing it for my own good. I'm afraid Yao Qianyu came to talk to me because she knew about my relationship with He Yebei.I patted my chest and said it was impossible, because He Yebei didn't recognize me at all.Xu Xu looked at me with a very meaningful look, and said weakly: "Maybe he didn't recognize it, but he also knew it?"

"What do you mean?" I felt wrong, and asked Xu Xu, but she immediately waved her hands and explained that she was just guessing.It wasn't until later that I realized what the deep meaning of what Xu Xu didn't say at the time was.

Of course Yao Qianyu didn't come to me because of He Yebei, maybe He Yebei had never mentioned her first love to her, that's why she was indifferent when she learned that my name was "Bei Yinan".Yao Qianyu approached me about my physical education exam. At the end of each semester, I have to take the 800-meter physical education exam. Every time I fail, I have to take the second makeup exam. Generally speaking, as long as I take the makeup exam, no matter whether the time is up to standard or not, the teacher will I'll give you a passing grade on the merits of your will.But during the week of the make-up exam, I happened to be on vacation at home and missed it. The physical education results came out first. Yao Qianyu asked the teacher why I failed the physical education. I will go to the playground to make up the exam later.

(End of this chapter)