A good dad is better than a rich dad

Chapter 59 8 Adolescence, rebelliousness is normal

The clear sky on a summer night is covered with thousands of sparks, each of which is crystal clear, and the cool breeze blows away the heat caused by the scorching heat.On the street, people are walking, chatting and entertaining leisurely in twos and threes.Two people in a hurry came from a distance, they were Junchi's parents, they looked around as they walked quickly, anyone who knew them well knew that they were looking for Junchi, because this kind of situation happened from time to time.After walking all over the street, they still didn't see Junchi, so the couple had to go to bookstores to look for him.

Sure enough, in a bookstore, they found Jun Chi who was immersed in martial arts novels.Recently, Junchi has become obsessed with martial arts novels, and is fascinated by the heroic and courageous martial arts characters in the books.For this reason, his parents talked to him several times earnestly, but he didn't expect that what his parents said would be his answer.Because he is obsessed with martial arts novels, Jun Chi even started to peek at the novels in class, and has been spotted by the teacher several times.In order not to let him continue to indulge, his parents tried their best to monitor him outside the classroom every day no matter it was windy or rainy.

"My son was very good when he was young. He was smart and obedient. He never quarreled with us. He even won awards for his paintings! I didn't expect him to become like this now. He read martial arts novels all day long, in order not to be caught by us. I found out that he turned off the lights every night and used a flashlight to watch..." the mother cried to the neighbor.

Obviously, the once "obedient" Junchi has begun to rebel.It can be said that rebellion is a natural manifestation that occurs simultaneously with self-growth, and it is an indispensable and important part of a child's development.

In the process of children's growth, there are two relatively obvious rebellious periods, namely, the first rebellious period at the age of two or three and the second rebellious period at adolescence.Adolescent children further develop their self-awareness and gradually form their own values, which are sometimes different from their parents' values, and are opposed by their parents and cannot be understood by their parents.So I looked for resonance among children of the same age, and my parents became less close.At this time, if parents intervene in their children's lives, they will inevitably resist and want to be independent.There are various forms of resistance, some do not talk to their parents, some oppose their parents everywhere, some run away from home, and even commit crimes.

In fact, rebellion in adolescence is a sign that children are growing up smoothly. On the contrary, those children who do not know how to rebel during adolescence are the most dangerous.Therefore, countries such as Europe and the United States attach great importance to children saying "NO" and encourage children to have their own ideas.Unfortunately, most Chinese parents are not aware of this. They always think that the best state of their children is to be "obedient".When children resist, they may even become furious.

The most important thing to talk to an adolescent child is not to get angry, but to give him enough freedom.Dad might as well pretend to be ignorant, don't always tell the child what to do, but let him do it by himself, and wait until he has a problem and realizes that he needs help, and then "turn out".The child's changes are actually worth appreciating, just like Junchi's obsession with martial arts novels, which shows that he likes those legendary lives. What Dad has to do is to understand him first, and then find some interesting novels from martial arts novels. Something that brings kids back to the realities of life.For example, let children watch more high-quality martial arts works, at least they can stay away from vulgar works.

Children's growth needs more "independent space", not only their own room, but also their own freedom of decision.Dad must learn to be silent, and he must also persuade his mother to keep silent in a timely manner.Adolescent children are tired of their parents' nagging, and they prefer to listen to the opinions of friends or other elders.Therefore, it is particularly important to find friends other than parents for children.

This kind of friends other than parents is best served by relatives of parents such as "uncle", "uncle" and "aunt" who are not much different in age from the child.It is very beneficial for children to associate with such people.Children can speak freely in front of them without any scruples. These "adults" can listen to their troubles and give them wise suggestions in their interactions with them, which is more conducive to their smooth puberty.

(End of this chapter)