Smart Women Should Read Men's Psychology: Secrets Men Don't Want You to Know

Chapter 22 Women, win the war with the world of men (8)
Conversation taboo at the wine table
Some people say that the most important moment for a man is at the wine table, which is not false at all.Don't look at whether men usually wear or not, stand or stand, walk or walk, but they pay more attention to the wine table.Although these are all "nonsense" to punish the other party for drinking and make the other party drink more, if you violate their "territory", they will still be dissatisfied.Therefore, you must be careful when speaking at the wine table, so as not to be caught by men as "pigtails".

Generally speaking, the following points should be paid attention to when talking at the wine table:

1. Reticence is not advisable

Most men don't want to get along with people who are hard-talking or don't ask or answer.No matter what you ask, these people will only answer vaguely "yes", "no", "hello", "uh".In fact, they seem to prefer to watch you talking endlessly alone, especially when drinking. They think that drinking is about friendship, and if you don’t talk, it means that you have no friendship, and there is no need for everyone to drink together.

2. Avoid emotional topics
So if someone asks about your emotions at a party and you're not ready to mention them, don't force yourself to answer.If you burst into tears or run out the door, it can ruin a good evening not just for you, but for the questioner and host, and you worry about what people will say about you later.

3. Don't tell disgusting jokes

In order to adjust the dining atmosphere, some people often tell some jokes, such as beer is horse urine, dung beetles move, etc., which make diners feel disgusted.Especially some joking people like to say or read some disgusting jokes at this time, which not only affects the appetite of diners, but also shows a person's uncivilized behavior.Although this behavior is mainly manifested in men, some women also occasionally participate in it.

4. Avoid discussing personal issues during business dinners
At a business dinner, while not all the topics are related to work, it should never be the same as with a personal friend, where you can gossip as you like, even if the atmosphere is very friendly.When you bring up a topic, be sure to consider other people's circumstances, for example, don't talk about marriage in front of someone who lives alone.If you know that the guest's unit is more profitable, don't ask him how much the bonus is, because it may involve content that the unit is unwilling to disclose.Also, don't talk about gossip about the country or its leaders.When talking about business, you should pay more attention to what you want to talk about, sometimes you may pay a high price for one sentence.

5. Please leave the table when answering the phone
Due to the frequent use of mobile phones, you often receive calls during the banquet. At this time, you should politely say "I'm sorry, I'm going out to answer the call" to the person dining at the same table, instead of talking loudly and loudly to the caller at the table. Talk endlessly.

6. Don’t invade personal space
During the conversation, except for occasionally turning your body towards others because the music is too loud, you should keep some distance between you and the other party at other times.You may think that hooking up with a stranger is not a big deal, but most people would hate it.If you feel like your space is being invaded by the other person, take a step back.If the opponent follows up, then you hold the wine glass in front of you as a blocker.

7. Other issues to pay attention to when talking at the dinner table
(1) When talking to someone next to you, don't touch them first.

(2) Don't interrupt others, and don't inquire about the content of other people's conversations at the dinner table.

(3) When talking to the person next to you, be careful not to turn your back to the other person.

(4) It is best not to talk across people, especially when talking loudly with the person across the table between two or more people.

(5) Don't be picky about the restaurant's cooking, and don't complain about the waiter's work.

(6) Don't talk while eating.Don't eat too fast in a rush to talk, and don't cram a lot of food into your mouth at once.If someone talks to you, wait until the food in your mouth is swallowed before speaking.

(7) If you cannot eat a certain dish due to reasons such as health or custom, do not express rejection or disgust obviously, let alone give too many explanations, especially do not talk about your own illness.

(8) Talk to people nearby, don't speak too loudly, but don't whisper either.If it is inconvenient to speak publicly, it should be discussed on another suitable occasion.

(9) Control yourself and don't talk too much. Talking eloquently alone is annoying.Don't quarrel with others, and don't show displeasure because you don't talk well with each other.

six.Practice mind attack, let strange men listen to your command

Different men have different thoughts, therefore, different techniques should be used for different men, so as to hold them in your hands and let them listen to your "disposal".Especially for a strange man, you can only change from passive to active and let him follow your pace only by using the technique of attacking the mind first; otherwise, once he has the right to speak, you can only "only" Fate is from".

Try to figure out a man's mind, so that you can speak your words into your heart
In fact, men are animals that are easy to listen to women, especially strange men. Because they are also strange to you, they will not refuse you directly out of politeness.Especially if you can get your words into their heart, you can change from passive to active and ask him to follow your pace.

If you want to speak to a man's heart, you need some small skills.You can gain insight into their psychology by their unintentional attitudes, so you can have targeted conversations.For example, if the other party hugs his arms, it means he is thinking about a problem; if he hugs his head, it means he is helpless; if he walks with his head down and his steps are heavy, it means that he is discouraged; with his head held high and his chest high, it is a sign of self-confidence; shaking his legs is often a sign of inner uneasiness , Thinking hard about countermeasures; if there is a slight tremor, it may be a sign of a leisurely mood.Knowing the psychology of men at the moment, you can easily grasp their vital points and make them completely obey you.

Of course, the understanding of men should not stop at silent observation, but also active reconnaissance, adopt certain reconnaissance countermeasures, and mobilize the other party's emotions, so as to be able to quickly and accurately grasp the other party's thoughts and dynamics, so as to guide them along the way , to make the talks more successful.

When talking to a strange man, you need to consider the following aspects:

1. Age difference
Provocative language should be used for young people; interests and interests for middle-aged people should be stated for their consideration; for older people, the tone should be discussed and respect should be shown as much as possible.

2. Regional differences
People living in different regions should use different methods of persuasion.For example, for northerners in our country, you can adopt a rough attitude; for southerners, you should be more delicate.

3. Occupational differences
Use a language that is closely related to the professional knowledge of the other party to talk to it, and the other party's sense of trust in you will be greatly enhanced.

4. Personality differences
If the other party has a bold personality, you can go straight to the point; if the other party is slow, you have to "work slowly and carefully";

5. Cultural differences
Generally speaking, the method used for people with low education level should be simple and clear, using more specific figures and examples; for people with high education level, abstract reasoning methods can be used.

6. Differences in hobbies
When talking with people, if you talk about the other person's hobbies, you will be very interested in convenience, and at the same time, you will also have a good impression of you, which will lay a good foundation for you to find someone to do things with.

Use the "opposite sex effect" to make men "obedient"

Liu Lan is the manager of the public relations department of a certain company. She has a wide network of contacts, and she is sure to win when she is a teacher, and she has made great contributions to the company.The company's raw materials were in short supply, and the comrades in the material department were running around and bumping into walls again and again, but as soon as Liulan came out, the problem was easily solved.The company's capital turnover is not good, and it is in urgent need of loans. The general manager is so anxious that he is like an ant on a hot pot, and Liulan is dealing with the banks. It didn't take long for him to get a loan of millions of yuan.Therefore, Liulan has been highly valued by the leaders.

Some people laughed and said: "Women will go out, one is worth two." People will find that there are two reasons for Liulan's success after careful observation: one is that she has a clear mind, quick eloquence, rich knowledge and experience; Treating people is also more flexible.The second is that she has a dignified appearance and elegant appearance. It can be said that her feminine appearance has added a lot of points to her.

There is a law in psychology called "the law of the opposite sex", which refers to the phenomenon of "same sex repels and opposite sex attracts" between people, and the subtle impact of this phenomenon on social interaction.According to this law, in a social situation between a man and a woman, men often want to show unrestrained manners, extraordinary manners, brilliant talents, elegant conversation, and witty remarks, so that it is easier to arouse women's favor.Of course, in social situations, this psychology of men is a potential consciousness.Therefore, when a man and a woman interact alone, the taciturn man will speak freely and eloquently; the timid and cowardly man will become extremely brave; the vulgar and brutal man will become refined and gentle.This kind of extra-normal enthusiasm shown in communication between opposite sexes can promote the success of things, and it is a positive effect in the "opposite sex effect".

This positive effect of the opposite sex is more intense in young men and women.This is because as young people mature physically and mentally, they are in the period of getting close to, admiring and pursuing the opposite sex, and often involuntarily shift their attention to the opposite sex.They are emotionally eager to communicate with the opposite sex in order to discover themselves, improve themselves and understand others, so as to experience deep emotional attachment, and eager to be affirmed by the opposite sex to increase their self-confidence.

In the subconscious of men, I hope that I am the only man in the world, and all the women in the world are in love with me.Therefore, when men hear that a woman, especially a beautiful woman, has a boyfriend or is married, they often feel a sense of loss inexplicably.In a man's social life, if the other party is a couple, his enthusiasm and help for that woman will drop sharply, and he will consciously or unconsciously embarrass that man.And that man has to try his best to maintain his dignity and his status in the eyes of the lover in front of the lover. At this time, the two men are prone to conflict.

In communication, the effect of the opposite sex is often not as straightforward as the above, and sometimes it is even the opposite.For example, a man who has repeatedly suffered setbacks in choosing a mate may have a feeling of hatred towards women, so in his interactions with the opposite sex, there will be no positive effect of the opposite sex effect, and even a negative effect.However, the opposite sex effect is still common in communication.In daily communication, if you want a man to be "obedient", you might as well take advantage of this "opposite sex effect".

Strange men can also be friends

Most women are reserved by nature. When facing strange men, they always hesitate and dare not approach them. Even if they ask for help, they will stand aside and wait for the other party to pay attention to them, and take the initiative to strike up a conversation with themselves. This is not good for their own development.In fact, it doesn't take so much effort to talk to men. If you treat them as your friends, you can easily chat and gradually become friends.

(End of this chapter)