Life management lessons of choice and abandonment

Chapter 39 A Gentleman’s Friendship, As Light as Water (1)
Friendship is the contract and resonance of the soul, and it is the opening of each other's hearts to listen to the whisper of the heart.

Format friendship, delete suspicious virus

Suspicion is often an artificial psychological barrier.Only by opening up the heart, making the guesses deep in the soul public, and increasing the transparency of the soul, can we seek mutual understanding.

The male and female eagles live together. When autumn comes, they go out together to pick fruits and put them in their nests.
After a long time, the fruit will dry up, and half of the fruit that was originally a full nest is left.The male eagle blamed the female eagle and said: "We have worked so hard to pick the fruit, but now half of the nest is missing for no reason, you must have eaten it." "The eagle said: "The fruit doesn't have wings, so it will fly away by itself. You ate it and didn't admit it. I really misunderstood you." After speaking, he pecked the female eagle to death.

After a few days, it rained heavily, and the rain soaked the fruit in the nest, and the fruit became a full nest again.When the eagle saw it, he realized that he had wronged the female eagle, but there was no way to save it.

Suspicion among friends is like an invisible poison, but one can smell its pervasive scent.True friends trust each other, and the tragedy that happened to the male and female eagles is the result of a crisis of trust.Keith Collins said: "Close yourself up, the wind and rain are hidden, but the sun can't shine in." Suspicion locks oneself into a grave, and the only one who can become a gravedigger is himself.Only by opening your heart and learning to trust can you accommodate the sea and bathe in the sunshine.

Suspicious people are narrow-minded, preoccupied with facts, and make doubts and beliefs absolute, and they have since tied a heavy burden for themselves.When we start to suspect someone, it is best to make a comprehensive analysis of his usual personality, experience, and the performance of working with him for many years.This helps nip false suspicions in the bud.When suspicion arises, you can be vigilant, and when the suspicion is unreasonable, you can avoid misleading good people.

Suspicion for a long time will inevitably lead to an imbalance of the mind, a tendency to go to extremes, narrow cognition, indifference, and distorted personality, which may eventually lead to abnormal and abnormal personality.If something unpleasant happens between friends, you must keep a clear head, maintain trust, and avoid suspicion, because it is easier to lose a friend than to gain one.Friends who are usually very good friends, driven by suspicion, often cause irreparable consequences because of some small things.

Suspicion is like a blind poison, which will make friendship lose its mellow taste, and it will also make two hearts stay away without leaving a trace.

Friendship is like water, tolerance is like a cup

There can be no friendship without tolerance.Tolerance is a kind of strength and a bridge between friends.There is such a story:
During World War II, a unit meets the enemy in the forest and a fierce battle ensues.The last two fighters from the same town lost contact with the troops.

The two trekked hard in the forest, encouraging and comforting each other.Half a month passed, and they still hadn't contacted the troops. Fortunately, they killed a deer, and they could survive a few more days relying on venison.However, they never saw any animals after that.Only some of the remaining venison was carried on the backs of the young warriors.

On this day, they encountered the enemy in the forest. After another fierce battle, the two avoided the enemy skillfully.Just when they thought they were safe, they heard a gunshot, and the young soldier walking in front was shot, fortunately in the shoulder.The comrade-in-arms behind ran over in panic. He was so frightened that he could not speak coherently, hugged his comrade-in-arms' body and burst into tears, and hurriedly tore off his shirt to bandage his comrade-in-arms' wound.

At night, the uninjured soldier kept talking about his mother, his eyes fixed.Both of them thought their lives were about to end, and neither of them moved the venison beside them.After dawn, the troops rescued them.

Thirty years later, the wounded soldier said: "I know who fired that shot, he was my comrade. He died last year. I touched his hot barrel as he hugged me, but I forgave him that night. I knew he wanted to eat the venison I carried to live, but I also knew he lived for his mother. For 30 years, I pretended I didn't know about it and never mentioned it And. The war was too cruel. His mother still didn't wait for him to go back. I paid homage to the old man with him. He knelt down and asked me to forgive him, but I didn't let him go on. We have been friends for more than 30 years, I have no reason not to forgive him."

One person's tolerance maintains the friendship of two people for a lifetime.By being tolerant, we can understand people's difficulties, make up for their faults, promote their strengths, and understand their shortcomings, so as to win permanent friendship.Flaws and faults are unavoidable in friends. Understanding and tolerance are the best medicine to relieve pain and conflicts, and can sublimate friendship and make it more pure and pure.

Maybe there are indeed many contradictions and difficulties in getting along with friends in life. There are many people who don't understand others, and many people who don't understand them.But human ability is limited after all.Instead of resenting your friends, it's better to keep yourself calm and do what you should do.Depressed, annoyed, and angry about some gossip and bumps all day long, always go to someone to tell, argue with the other party, and even always want to retaliate even more, this will destroy friendship, and it will also destroy your own life. More good things.Sometimes a smile or a humorous word can dissolve the resentment and conflicts between people and fill the gap in friendship.

If you want friendship to last forever, you must put aside your narrow-mindedness and be more tolerant and considerate to your friends.

Friendship as light as water, as sincere as water

The ancients said it well: "The friendship between gentlemen is as light as water." The word "light" emits a faint but long-lasting fragrance.

In the wind and rain of wandering in a foreign land, two poor people with the same experience met and got along day and night.

One day, for their respective dreams, they had to part ways.

A poor man said to another poor man: "If I have money now, I would most like to buy you a gift as a souvenir."

Another poor man also said with infinite emotion: "Or we can exchange a personal item with each other, then we can feel each other's existence all the time."

But they have nothing.However, on that autumnal afternoon, they finally exchanged a gift, and each set off on the road without any regrets.

It turned out that they had exchanged each other's names.

The friendship between two people who have always been there is so weak, but there is a trace of friendship.It can be seen that abandoning hypocrisy and grasping the scale of friendship just right is also a kind of touching friendship.It is as light as water, but it reveals sincerity and depth.Cherish friendship, even if you meet only once, you can express your sincerity.Once a person focuses on thinking and helping others, he becomes powerful and irresistible.In interpersonal communication, letting everyone feel your pure and kind heart is the most precious gift you can give to your friends.

Although the friendship between gentlemen is as plain as water, they can stand in the same boat through storms and never change in life and death.Sidney Smith said: "Life is supported by many friendships, and the greatest happiness exists in loving and being loved." If a person cannot handle interpersonal relationships well, it is like walking through a minefield and struggling.Making friends is a process of choice.Friends can be temporary or permanent.If you share the same goals, have deep feelings, and connect with each other, you can change from friends who cooperate and work together to become bosom friends who depend on each other through life and death, and share weal and woe.

The friendship between gentlemen is plain and pure, but true, intimate and long-lasting.

Strong wind knows strong grass, adversity knows friendship

Jimmy said: People keep leaving or entering in life.So, what is seen is not seen; what is remembered is forgotten.But friends are people who can go together for a lifetime, "in a word, for a lifetime, for a lifetime of love, and for a glass of wine."On the road of life, through the wind, through the rain, with the support of friends along the way, life is happy enough.In life, many people rely on the support of friends to overcome difficulties and achieve success.Many ancient and modern Chinese and foreign celebrities follow their best friends with their own hearts and share weal and woe.

In the Northern Song Dynasty, when Qin Guan heard that Su Shi was imprisoned for the Wutai poetry case, he immediately crossed the river and rushed to Wuxing for interrogation.Su Shi was demoted to Huangzhou, and Qin Guan asked someone to bring letters and his own poems, and Su Shi immediately wrote back.Later, Qin Guan was implicated by Su Shi and was also reprimanded.The two exchanged poems and books in their respective demoted lands and encouraged each other.

During this period, the two met once in Haikang. Qin Guan showed Su Shi his own elegy. Su Shi stroked Qin Guan's back and said with great emotion: "I am often worried that you have failed to understand the principles of life and death." , what should I say now?!"

Qin Guan took out a self-made elegy, clearly saying that he had prepared for the worst, had seen through the barrier of life and death, and had nothing to be afraid of.Su Shi was filled with emotion about this. He told Qin Guan that he had written the epitaph and handed it to his followers without letting his son know.When they talked, laughed, sang and said goodbye together, they have experienced the baptism of life and death together in spirit, and can face all difficulties with the most calm state of mind, and their friendship has also risen from adversity to friendship. Life and death.

The friendship between Qin Guan and Su Shi corresponds to an English proverb: "A Friend indeed is a friend in need." That is to say, a friend in need is a friend indeed.The famous ancient Greek poet Euripides said: "When you are rich, you will be full of friends, and friends in need are sincere." A friend who can share weal and woe is a confidant in life and a true friend.

When you encounter difficulties, you can reach out to give you a hand, give you help, and let you tide over the difficulties are true friends.Those who have shared many adversities together, their friendship can be called unbreakable.In your most difficult time, when you have nothing, there are still people who care about us and trust us. What a rare happiness.On the contrary, those who don't have much contact with each other on weekdays, and come up to join in the fun as soon as they see us in high positions will never become our friends.

Friendship beyond life is enough to touch our souls and moisten our hearts.Belinsky said: "True friends don't talk about friendship. They don't ask each other for friendship, but do everything they can for each other." Just as pig iron can only be tempered in the fire Like steel, the strongest friendship is formed in times of adversity.

Only through common adversity can you discern who your bosom friend is.

Only with sincere care can friendship bloom beautiful flowers
Friendship is not a cactus with strong vitality, but a plant that needs sunshine and rain.Those who cannot be sincere to their friends will never have true friendship.

The ox saw the fox whining and crying under the tree, and asked him why he was sad.

The fox wiped away his tears and said, "Everyone has three friends and four friends, but I am alone, and I feel uncomfortable..."

The scalper asked, "Isn't the flower cat your friend?"

(End of this chapter)