Harvard Emotional Intelligence Class

Chapter 56
Numerous examples tell us: Perseverance can bring success.We must not lose the spirit of "three mores" in the new era. Persist more, have more confidence, and be more optimistic. Maybe success is half a mile away from us, and maybe success will appear the next day.

(Section [-], hold a peaceful heart, gain and lose according to fate
In life, whether it is facing prosperity, wealth, high position and weight, or facing poverty, loss of power and power, one must deal with it with peace of mind.Don't be happy with things, don't be sad with yourself, gain and loss is not only a spirit appreciated by the ancients, but also a necessary state of mind in this ever-changing contemporary age.Facing wind and rain calmly, gaining and losing because of cause and effect, is a kind of courage to become a big business person.

The Chinese Taoist school has always advocated such an idea: wandering freely, gains and losses follow fate.Power, wealth, and status are nothing but fleeting things. If things outside the body disturb one's mind because of them, then it is not the work of a wise man.There is nothing wrong with pursuing success and fame in itself, but you must treat success or failure with peace of mind, so that you will not be lost by success and lose yourself.

People who pursue power and position hope that one day they can cover the sky with one hand and turn the tide; Fame, sages honor aspirations, sages are precious." Pursuing these fame and wealth is not as good as pursuing a peaceful heart. Nothing is brought with you when you are born, and you will not take it away with death. If you can see the true meaning of life, you must be able to truly understand the meaning of life. Meaning, understand that things in the world can be pursued, but not forced, and it is wise to follow the fate of gains and losses.

★Li Si's fate
Li Si, a famous politician in the Qin Dynasty, can be said to have a prominent reputation and outstanding achievements.When he was young, he had an extreme love for power, so he worshiped Xunzi as his teacher, learning the art of emperors and the way of governing the country, in order to achieve something in the future.

In 247 B.C., Li Si came to the state of Qin, and first served as a guest under Qin Prime Minister Lu Buwei, and gained Lu Buwei's trust. With his recommendation, Li Si became the close servant of King Qin Yingzheng.Li Si took advantage of the opportunity of being close to the King of Qin frequently, and persuaded the King of Qin to seize the good opportunity of "the time of the eternity", "destroy the princes and become the emperor, and finally become the unification of the world".The king of Qin accepted Li Si's suggestion, first appointed him as a long history, and then worshiped him as a guest minister, and ordered him to formulate a strategy for unifying the world.

In 237 B.C., the royal family and nobles of the Qin State used various excuses to ask the King of Qin to order the expulsion of guest ministers from the six countries, and Li Si was also expelled.Li Si was unwilling to step down from the stage of history like this, so he wrote the "Book of Remonstrance and Chasing Guests", urging the King of Qin to withdraw his order.

The king of Qin was deeply moved after reading the "Book of Remonstrance and Expelling Guests", so he canceled the order of expelling guests and restored Li Si's official position.After Li Si became the prime minister, he took advantage of his position and made great reforms.The famous tragedy of "burning books and burying Confucian scholars" in history is a perverse action suggested by Li Si in order to attack Confucian scholars and slander the government.In 210 BC, after the death of Qin Shihuang, Li Si was afraid that his powerful status would be affected by the death of the first emperor, so in order to protect his interests, he and Zhao Gao colluded together, forged the will, and established the youngest son Hu Hai as emperor.He was shrewd all his life, but he never expected that after Zhao Gao usurped power, he would launch a conspiracy and frame Li Si for "rebellion".It was because of selfishness that Li Si got confused for a moment, and thus ended up dying.When he was about to be executed, he hugged his son and wept bitterly, saying: "I want to go out with Ruofu and lead the yellow dog to Shangcai Dongmen to chase the cunning rabbit, how can I get it!"★
Just imagine, if Li Si had long had a peaceful heart, looked at power and status indifferently, and was able to meet the requirement of leading a yellow dog to hunt every day, how could he be deceived by Zhao Gao and be involved in a dark affair? What about the political trap?

The heart of peace is indifferent. The "Tao Te Ching" has also commented on the value of peace: flattery and humiliation are like surprises, and greatness is like trouble.What is flattery?To be humiliated is to be inferior, to be astonished by what you gain, and to be astonished by what you lose.What does it mean to be as expensive as yourself?The reason why I have a big patient is because I have a body, and because I have no body, what trouble do I have! "The ancient sages told us that if we can't deal with the glory and humiliation indifferently, this is not the behavior of a sage. To achieve honor and disgrace, we must first calm down our mentality, not just some gains and losses. Make some regrettable behaviors. These unwise behaviors may affect a short period of time or a lifetime if they are serious.

To have a peaceful heart, you must be indifferent to fame and fortune, distinguish right from wrong, and know what is the most precious in life.With a thousand buckets of gold, a sincere smile cannot be exchanged; with world power, a healthy body cannot be exchanged.Wealth and power are nothing but floating soil, and the value of life lies in living happily and happily.However, whether life is joyful and happy is a subjective feeling of people. A peaceful heart is easier to see happiness than a heart that cares about gains and losses.In a person's life, there are nine out of ten unsatisfactory things. As long as you have a good attitude, treat it as ordinary things with an ordinary heart, be optimistic, and follow the fate of gains and losses, your mentality will be balanced.Treating life calmly is what a wise man does.

(Section [-]: Be humble, don’t reach the peak
Humility makes people progress, pride makes people lag behind.The history of thousands of years in China tells us that humility is not only a virtue of human beings, but also a kind of calm state of mind: only a humble heart can leave more space for life.Only with the calmness of not reaching the peak can one climb a higher mountain. There is no highest, only higher. A humble life is a life of continuous progress and continuous climbing.

★Humble Yao Ming
Speaking of Yao Ming, he is a household name in China.This basketball star with a height of more than two meters is deeply rooted in the hearts of the people. Even though he has achieved proud results, his humble traits still appear in him.For him, humility is a virtue he cannot give up.Even in the United States, where modesty is seen as hypocrisy or incompetence, Yao Ming has not given up his modesty.In a ball game, when he contributed 41 points, he still didn't give people the feeling of domineering and arrogant.Facing the reporters, he still evaluated himself modestly. Even though he had an absolute advantage in front of O'Neill, he did not show off himself, but praised the other party.I remember once, when the American media praised him as the number one center in the NBA, he just replied modestly: I will do better.In Yao Ming, his virtue of humility may be much better than his basketball scoring, and the traditional Chinese culture of humility has been fully propagated and carried forward by him. ★
At the beginning of the Eastern Han Dynasty, the famous general Feng Yi made many contributions in the war to establish the Eastern Han Dynasty, but after each battle, he hid alone under the big tree, meditating on his merits and demerits, and never gathered a group of people to hold a celebration banquet, etc. Therefore, the world praised him as General Dashu, and at the same time, he was impressed by his modesty.

Modesty can narrow the distance between people.When three people walk together, there must be my teacher.If you are always high and self-righteous, then you can only stand still and never achieve great development.Zhang Liang, one of Liu Bang's right-hand men, was a humble man.

★Huangqiao three-way shoes
One day, Zhang Liang was walking outside. When he stepped onto a bridge, an old man also stepped onto the bridge.He walked up to Zhang Liang, bent down, took off his shoes, threw them under the bridge, and said to Zhang Liang in an orderly tone, "Young man, go down and pick up my shoes." He went to get the shoes, but he thought that the other party was an old man, so he said modestly: "Okay." So he ran down the bridge, picked up the shoes, and returned to the bridge to hand them to the old man.

The old man didn't pick up the shoes, so he said to him, "Young man, put them on for the old man." Zhang Liang was helpless, thinking to himself, let's do good things to the end.So he knelt under the old man and helped him put on his shoes.The old man said to him: "You young man is worth teaching. Come to the bridge and meet me at dawn in five days."

Five days later, Zhang Liang arrived at the bridge on time, but the old man was already waiting there.The old man said: "You are late, come back in five days!" So the old man left angrily.Five days later, when the sky was light, Zhang Liang rushed to the bridge, but the old man arrived earlier than him.The old man said: "You are late again! If you want to learn something, come back in five days!"

Zhang Liang didn't give up. Although he wasn't sure if the old man was playing tricks on him, he still decided to find out after five days.On the fifth day, Zhang Liang did not sleep, and went to the bridge in the middle of the night to wait for the old man.Soon, the old man came, and this time he finally didn't scold the young man again: he said approvingly: "Yes, this is the way of humbly appreciating a teacher." Liang said: "Only a humble person can be able to bend and stretch, and will be able to achieve something in the future. Take this book back and study it carefully, and it will help you become a pillar of the country in the future." From then on, Zhang Liang devoted himself to studying the " Later, when he heard that Liu Bang, the king of Han, led an uprising, he took refuge in Liu Bang and assisted Liu Bang to win military victories again and again with what he had learned.With the assistance of Zhang Liang, Liu Bang finally overthrew the Qin Dynasty and established the Han Dynasty. ★
People who take credit and pride are short-sighted. They tend to be self-righteous because of one or two successes, and give up the journey of continuous improvement.There is no real peak in the world. As long as life exists, we can continue to work hard. Only by inheriting such virtues can we maintain a humble heart.Self-promotion and self-expansion will only lead to the final rupture of dreams. A person who truly understands life will not waste time on bragging. Only by humbly learning the strengths of others can he achieve self-transcendence.

Modesty is a beautiful moral cultivation, with such cultivation, life is more beautiful and fulfilling.Only with a humble attitude can we continue to sublimate ourselves. "The prime minister can hold a boat in his stomach", for modest people, life is a bottle that can never be filled. They constantly expand their minds and absorb the essence, so that they can make new progress every day.

(Section [-] Make a little progress every day
At Harvard, you don't see people who are lazy and speculative.Harvard professors told students: "The meaning of life is not just to live, but to make something for this world and leave something behind." They believe that if you want to achieve something, you must work hard and work hard .The same is true for learning, not for lack of time but for lack of effort.Many people will say, I really want to study, but I really don't have time.In fact, if you really want to learn and achieve something, the time is not a problem at all, the problem is whether you have worked hard for your own ideas.

"Pray, and then study." This is a phrase that Dunst, the second president of Harvard University, often hangs on his lips.

(End of this chapter)