Harvard Emotional Intelligence Class

Chapter 68 Change yourself, you are the master of your life (3)
(Section [-] reward yourself appropriately
In the process of our own struggle, there will always be times when we are exhausted, and even when we encounter setbacks, we will have the idea of ​​giving up. At this time, we really need a kind of strength, which can support us to continue to work hard. Or make us more motivated, this is the power of motivation.Many times people always think that motivation is given by others, but in fact, at the right time, it is a better stimulant to cheer yourself up and encourage yourself.When you achieve a certain plan you have made, you can proudly say to yourself "You are awesome!", or you can reward yourself with a big meal, which will not only relax you, but also motivate you Motivation to keep going.Therefore, don't be stingy with compliments to yourself, and give yourself certain rewards at the right time.People who reward themselves better know how to keep themselves energetic, and such people are more likely to be close to success.

★Reward yourself appropriately

Four young people from different directions found Lu Ban, hoping to learn exquisite woodworking skills from Lu Ban.Luban took out four axes without handles and said to the four young men: "Over the six hills of the Western Mountains, there is a bush forest. Each of my axes needs a handle made of bushes. The four of you Go. When I come back, I will pass on all my skills to you."

Lu Ban's family took out four dry food bags from the kitchen and filled them with the same amount of biscuits and eggs.He said to the four people: "Go, here is the food for you on the road." The four young people picked up the axes, carried the dry food on their backs and set off on the road.

The scorching sun and the road full of thorns made the four young people feel thirsty, hungry, bitter and tired.Half way up the first mountain, the four of them sat on the grass by the stream, drank a few mouthfuls of sweet spring, and then opened the bag of dry food.There are 6 biscuits and 6 eggs in the dry food bag.A young man suggested: "We should climb to the top of the mountain to eat!" Another young man smiled at him and said: "Don't be stupid, now we are hungry and hungry, and we have to carry heavy bags of dry food. It solves the problem of hunger, and lightens the burden on the body..." He said while picking up sesame seed eggs and stuffing them into his mouth.

Seeing him eating with gusto, the other two young people swallowed a few mouthfuls of saliva and picked up the sesame seed eggs.A young man ate 3 sesame seed cakes and 3 eggs, then lay on the grass and patted his swollen belly and said, "It's so cool! I won't go up, I'm bitter and tired. I'll go down the mountain in a while, and the food left is just enough I will eat on the way."

The three continued on.When they reached the top of the mountain, the three young men were resting under the tree. The young man who hadn't eaten anything halfway opened the bag of dry food, took out a biscuit and an egg, and said, "I finally climbed to the top of the mountain. This is my reward for myself!" Yes, we have passed a test, we should reward ourselves! The other two young people also opened the dry food bags and started eating...

Halfway up the second mountain, a young man's dry food bag was empty.He lay on the grass and said lazily: "You two go, I can't stand this kind of suffering anymore."

The two continued to move forward, and when they reached the top of the mountain, the two young men were resting under the tree.The young man who hadn’t eaten halfway opened his dry food bag, took out a biscuit and an egg, and said, “Finally climbed to the top of a mountain again!” Another young man ate his last biscuit and an egg, looked at Looking at the four peaks in front of him, he said: "The road to seek a teacher is too difficult, you go alone!"

When he reached a mountain, he would always open the bag of dry food with a smile on his face, and reward himself for his success...

After turning over the last hill, the young man finally saw the bush forest that the master had mentioned.On a big rock next to the bushes, Master Lu Ban sat on it with a smile.The young man rushed forward to bow down, Lu Ban hurriedly pulled the young man up and asked, "Where are the others?" The young man said, "They gave up halfway!" "Then why do you keep going?" "Because the master gave me food as a reward, I will taste the joy of success when I climb a mountain..." Before the young man finished speaking, Lu Ban laughed loudly and said, "Okay, I will accept it." I'm going to let you down as an apprentice..."★
The young man who finally became Luban's apprentice is a person who is very good at rewarding himself at the right time. He didn't eat his own food all at once, but regarded it as a reward for himself for climbing every mountain, so he kept his food on the road. Enthusiasm, this enthusiasm accompanied him to successfully reach the destination, and was appreciated by Lu Ban.

The road to success is difficult and bumpy, but people who learn to always reward and encourage themselves seem to be closer to success.Napoleon Hill has always believed in reward systems.When you achieve what you expect, you reward yourself, little rewards for small accomplishments, big prizes for big accomplishments.For example, if it takes several hours to complete a certain task, you should tell yourself to rest, eat something, or watch a football game when you are done.But never reward yourself before completing the task.When you achieve a major achievement, be sure to make the celebration one that will last a lifetime.

(Section [-] Keep Surpassing Yourself
A psychologist once said: "You must be better than you imagined, but many people don't think so." Yes, people always fear to imagine things beyond their imagination, thinking that it is impossible to achieve Yes, however, the fact is that human potential is infinite, as long as you are willing to tap, you will find that you can surpass your original self.Many outstanding people have great ambitions at a young age, wanting to be different, and no matter what hardships they encounter, they still believe that they are the best.Do you have such a belief, a self-confidence that cannot be defeated by others?How strong your persistence is, how strong your self-confidence is, and how long your road is.People are often used to expressing what they are familiar with and are good at.But if we are willing to look back and examine carefully, we will suddenly realize: the seemingly intense work challenges and the never-ending and increasingly difficult environmental pressure, have not unknowingly developed all kinds of abilities today?Because people do have unlimited potential!

Everyone should always remember this truth, only a person who constantly surpasses himself is a truly smart person.In life, everyone has their own unique disposition and talent, and everyone has their own unique entry point to realize the value of life.As long as you develop yourself according to your own endowment and constantly surpass the stumbling blocks of your soul, you will not ignore the sun in your own life and be submerged in the glory of others.

★Keep surpassing yourself

John and Tom are children from neighboring families. They have played together since they were young. John is a smart child who can learn everything. He knows his own advantages and is naturally quite proud.Tom's brain is not as bright as John's, and although he works hard, it is difficult to get into the top 10.Compared with John, he often shows a kind of inferiority complex in his heart, but his mother always encourages him: "If you always measure yourself by other people's achievements, you will be just a 'chaser' all your life. Mercedes-Benz Although the best horse always roars ahead at the beginning, it is often the camel full of patience and perseverance that finally arrives at the goal.”

John thinks he is a smart man, but his performance in his life is mediocre, and he failed to achieve any major events, while Tom, who thinks he is stupid, enriches himself in all aspects, surpasses himself bit by bit, and finally achieves extraordinary achievements.John was so indignant that he died in depression.After his soul flew to heaven, he questioned God: "My ingenuity far surpasses Tom, and I should be greater than him, but why did you make him an outstanding man in the world?" God smiled and said : "Poor John, you didn't figure it out until your death: I sent everyone into the world and put the same thing in his life 'bag', but put your smarts in front of the 'bag' In ", you are complacent because you saw or touched your own intelligence, so that you missed your whole life! But Tom's intelligence was put in the "bag" at the back, because he couldn't see his own intelligence, he always looked up Looking forward with his head straight, so he has been unconsciously moving forward all his life!"★
Because Tom has no extraordinary talent, he chose to be down-to-earth, start from small things, and achieve self-transcendence little by little. In the end, he achieved his own excellence, while the smart John thought he was very smart, and did not make good use of his talents. Talent, but chose to stand still. Over time, Tom surpassed him, and he could only feel unhappy in envying others.

A while ago, the TV station broadcast a live video of the final of the Advertising Rising Star Grand Prix. One of the contestants was originally a hotel waiter, and later became a singer. Now she wants to become an advertising star. She said a word during the competition : People are constantly surpassing themselves.

This sentence is very good. A person with ideals and ambitions must have the courage to constantly surpass himself, just as the great French writer Victor Hugo said: "The so-called living people are those who are constantly challenging and constantly climbing the peak of destiny. "Nowadays many people are good at challenging themselves. Zhang Haidi, who is physically and mentally strong, has constantly surpassed himself with a strong will and has become a role model for contemporary people; Xu Zhenchao has constantly surpassed himself with hard work and dedication, and won honor for the motherland; Liu Xiang surpassed himself with his own strength and won more honors.

Life is a performance performed by people for their dreams and interests.If you want to make the performance successful, you must constantly surpass yourself, no matter you are smart or stupid.When you step on the stage of life, you should perform with all your heart, forget the success you have had, give up the failure you have experienced, and forget your own intelligence.Because "smartness" is not helpful in acting, what it needs is down-to-earth devotion to self-transcendence and breakthrough time and time again.

(End of this chapter)