speak humor, be humorous

Chapter 8 The Ability of Humor (1)
Humor is not bragging, showing off cleverness; humor is not belittling and ridiculing, making fun of others.Humor should be tolerant and kind, open-minded and optimistic.Humor is the flash of a person's ability. Humor is the common quality of many successful people, and even the key factor of their success.With this ability, they can talk freely in the public and become the focus of everyone's attention; they can have both sides in the workplace and expand their contacts; they can also obtain business opportunities from customers, win the appreciation of bosses and colleagues...

Overcome yourself with humor

Humor research scholar Zhang Ruijun said: "Like trees need sunlight, air and water, what people need is humor. A sense of humor is the quality that modern people should have." He also said: "For tired people, humor is rest; for troubled people People, humor is the cure; for those who are sad, humor is comfort..." For all, humor is power!

Humor is a kind of speech or action. It is not a sword, a sword, a martial arts stunt, or an overwhelming force. It is a combination of wisdom and knowledge.Reflected by the power of wisdom and knowledge, humor has the magic power to turn danger into disaster.When you are in an embarrassing situation where you are besieged on all sides, or in an embarrassing situation where you are criticized by others, humor can give you the power to turn defeat into victory.

How to get rid of the negative emotions of depression, pessimism, troubles and melancholy, and make your spiritual home bright and sunny?An important psychotherapy is a kind of "rationalization" or "self-deprecating" humor therapy.It requires people to have an optimistic attitude towards life; it requires people to downplay suffering and seek happiness in suffering; it requires people to see hope when they are disappointed; peace of mind.If you do this, your spiritual tree will grow green, and the Great Wall of Faith in your heart will not collapse to the ground.We can say that humor can give people a strong support for their spiritual home, making people persevere on the path of life that is full of bittersweet and twists and turns, and realize the real value of life.

Be humorous about yourself, laughing off your own merits and honors.This will give you a lot of understanding.

When a man was congratulated at an election meeting on his victory and appointment to a high office, he replied: "In any case, Brazilian football deserves more congratulations on the game it won last week."

He treated his promotion lightly, used his humility to win the respect of others, improved his image, and of course it was easier to get closer to others.

In life, praise needs humor, and criticism needs humor even more. Humor can make criticism convey goodwill.If there is a disagreement between the two parties, and one of the parties puts aside seriousness and uses humorous language to imply blame without hurting the person, then even ironic and semi-tolerant humor can accurately express blame, In order to achieve the purpose and function of not harming people.The reason is that after the humor is conveyed to the other party, what affects the other party does not depend entirely on what the words are, but a large part depends on what kind of feeling your humor gives the other party.Obviously, sincere, well-meaning humor, even if it conveys a message of blame, usually does not arouse repugnance or ill-feeling.However, serious criticism and accusations are much more likely to cause differences and break up.

In the face of death, Churchill said humorously: "I am ready to meet God, but what has God prepared to meet me?"

The French revolutionary Danton shouted before his death: "Take my head! My head is worth seeing."

American novelist O. Henry said before his death: "Light up all the lights, I don't want to go back to my hometown in the dark."

In the face of death, these wise men maintain a detached and humorous attitude, what an extraordinary bearing it must be!

Academician Anuoxin, a Soviet scholar, said: "We should learn to exercise our emotions with humor, just like exercising muscles." Chekhov also warned people: "My friend, if a match burns in your pocket, then you Be glad, and thank God, that you don't have a powder magazine in your pocket. If you get a thorn in your finger, be happy, and be lucky, that the thorn isn't in your eye..." Good spiritual home, May wish to use humor to support!
Enhancing abilities with humor

As an art of motivation, humor plays an important role in daily communication.Leaders and supervisors with a humorous temperament can easily gather a group of employees who work for him. The supervisor's humor will resolve many embarrassments and maintain the self-esteem of employees.

Many important figures in American history, such as Lincoln, Roosevelt, Wilson, etc., are representatives who are good at using the art of humor.

Once, Lincoln and a friend talked while walking. When they walked to the corridor, a group of soldiers who had been waiting for a long time to receive the president's lecture cheered in unison, but the friend did not realize that he should retreat.At this time, an adjutant stepped forward and reminded him to take eight steps back. The friend realized his impoliteness and blushed immediately, but Lincoln immediately smiled and said, "Mr. I still can’t tell who is the president!” Just such a simple sentence immediately broke the awkward atmosphere of the scene.

People should be kind to themselves, to others, to the failures, pains, and even physical defects in life. If you look at it from another angle, treat it with interesting thoughts and a relaxed attitude, then your life will be full of bright colors. Melancholy mood will become clear.

A fat female politician in the United States made fun of herself in her campaign speech: "Once I wore a white swimsuit and swam in the sea, but I attracted Soviet bombers. They thought they had spotted an American warship." The result was laughing Among them, voters did not think her obesity was a hindrance, which gave her an advantage in the election.

From a management point of view, humor is not just a child's trick, a happy smiling face, it should complement each other to improve production efficiency.The intensified competition and economic turmoil have put the employees of enterprises under extraordinary pressure.How to maintain the morale of employees while stimulating their creativity and "thinking outside the box" is more important than ever for companies.

Using humor to manage, managers can often achieve very good results.According to a survey of 1160 managers in the United States: 77% of them tell jokes to break the deadlock in employee meetings; 52% of them think that humor helps them conduct business; A "humor consultant" to help employees relax; 50% advocated "good laughs" among employees.Some well-known multinational companies, from the president to the general department managers, have begun to integrate humor into daily management activities and use it as a brand-new training method.

Humor can also make the relationship between people harmonious and resolve the company's internal conflicts.When the economic recession makes the company have to face the problem of layoffs, it can also use humor to resolve various risks that may arise in the process of layoffs.The Owens Fiber Company of the United States once laid off 40% of its employees at the beginning of the new century. Considering the various problems that may be caused by this, the company's management hired a special humor consultant to use more than 1 people in two months. employees implemented a humor program and various humor activities were carried out within the company.As a result, the dire consequences such as mob riots, sabotage, threats and intimidation, and suicide attempts that the company feared did not occur.

People like to get along with humorous people. In the West, a man without a sense of humor is simply synonymous with unattractive and stupid.A humorous supervisor is more likely to bond with subordinates than a staid and serious one.Experienced supervisors know that in order to make the subordinates around them work together, it is necessary to humanize their image through humor. So how can you become a humorous supervisor?
It is obviously indispensable to read widely and broaden one's knowledge.The more knowledge you have accumulated, the more confident you will be when you come into contact with all kinds of people on various occasions.In addition to this, you need to cultivate noble tastes and optimistic beliefs.A narrow-minded, negative-minded person will not have a sense of humor. Humor belongs to those who are open-minded and full of enthusiasm for life.In addition, to improve observation and imagination, one must be good at using associations and metaphors.As a business executive, you must consciously train your reaction speed and adaptability to things.Participate in more social interactions, get in touch with all kinds of people, enhance your social interaction skills, and enhance your sense of humor.As a beautiful and healthy quality of managers, humor can be used properly to motivate employees to spend every day with you in a cheerful atmosphere.

Of course, humor is a kind of creative skill, which should be adapted to the situation according to the object, environment and the atmosphere of the moment, but the following skills should also be paid attention to: one is not to be humorous at will.Humor can't be used anytime and anywhere, it should be played on certain occasions and conditions.For example, in a formal meeting, when your subordinate is speaking, you suddenly say one or two funny words, maybe everyone is amused by your humor, but the subordinate who made the speech must think that you do not respect him , was not interested in what he had to say.The second is that humor should be elegant.The third is that there is no need to insist on humor when it is not humorous.If the conditions at that time were not perfect, but you tried your best to show humor, the result must be reluctant, should you smile?This will put each other in an even more awkward situation.

temper the will with humor

On the long road of life, everyone will inevitably encounter adversity.Many people are afraid of the turmoil and pain brought about by adversity, but in the long run, some small setbacks from time to time can keep people clear-headed, withstand tests, and sharpen their will.

Humorous people believe that failure is the mother of success.Failure and success can be transformed into each other under certain conditions. It is precisely because there have been failures that we can achieve success after constantly summarizing the lessons of failure.If a person is surrounded by success all the time, then an occasional small failure may be a rather cruel test for him, and failure may follow him everywhere.

Humor oozes with a strong will.A person with a sense of humor is often a pushy trendsetter.Facing the blow of failure and the harsh environment, they can hold a humorous attitude, so as to achieve self-improvement.Inventor Edison is a person who is good at treating failure with humor and keeps making progress.

In the process of inventing the electric lamp, Edison failed to test the material of the filament 1 times, but he could not find a good metal that could withstand high temperature and be durable.At this time someone said to him: "You have failed 200 times, do you still want to try?"

"No. I have not failed. I have found 1 kinds of materials are not suitable for filament." Edison said humorously.

It was with this amazing power of humor that Edison saw hope from failure and encouragement from setbacks.This is the knack of this great inventor's indomitable and fruitful achievements.Sometimes, our will and our confidence can slip in the face of failure, and well-timed humor can help us avoid that.

If someone can't beat his friend in tennis, he can humorously say to his friend: "I have already found out where the problem is. My hobby is tennis, but I go to the table tennis club to learn."

He can also say, "How about we draw a tie? I don't want to catch up with you everywhere, and you don't want to overtake me."

This kind of humor is not self-deception, nor does it ask us to bury our heads in the sand when we see danger like an ostrich. This kind of humor can effectively prevent our will from slipping, and it can also bring us closer to others with a knowing smile. psychological distance.

what's wrong with humor

Humor pervades different contexts with its great functions. It can make people willing to accept the truth, contribute to the harmony of interpersonal relationships, and can also turn embarrassment into relaxation, so that criticism can achieve good results.But humor should also pay attention to the time and occasion, and the target should be targeted, and casual humor should not be avoided.

If humor is used at the wrong time and occasion, it will not only fail to achieve the desired effect, but also cause displeasure to others.

A beautiful lady was standing in front of her husband's grave, weeping, when a strange man came over.He said: "Madam, I am deeply sorry for your husband's tragic death, and I sympathize with your misfortune. But I have to tell you that when I saw you, I fell in love with you." .”

The lady said, "Shut up, rascal! Get the hell out of here, or I'll call the police."

And another stranger said softly: "Don't be angry, ma'am, I didn't want to disturb you at this time, let alone express my feelings at this time. But when the time comes no more, who can take advantage of your beauty?" How about holding yourself up in front of you?"

The lady pretended to be angry and said: "Is this the time to talk about love? You should come to me when I am not crying! The address is here."

This twists and turns funny drama has already told us that no matter how funny you are, if you don’t figure out the time and occasion, not only will others not be moved by you, but it will also have the opposite effect.

In addition to grasping the time and occasion, humor is also different from country to country, and is restricted by conditions such as nationality, era, aesthetic psychology, and historical and cultural traditions.

In a market in Paris, France, there was a butcher who sold very well because of his cheerful personality and humorous speech.

When he sells meat, he always talks kindly and non-stop.

"Hello, young man! What would you like to eat? Do you want some roast meat or veal? I think it's better to eat some veal, which is tender and fragrant. Men who eat veal will be particularly strong, what do you think?" He called The gentleman named "young man" is an old man in his 60s.Hearing such a kind address from him, I was naturally happy.This smile seemed to flatten the wrinkles on his face, and he bought a lot of veal.

Just imagine, if this businessman also uses this method to do business in China, then this old man called "young man" will definitely stare at each other and walk away.

Humor also needs to distinguish the target. It is often harmless to make a few jokes on the people around you or those who are close to you.However, if the other party is older or has a higher status than yourself, such as an elder, superior or expert, then you must carefully consider the humorous words and methods, otherwise it is extremely impolite.

In addition, humor should pay attention to gender, personality and other differences.If you are joking with men, the space is large and the size is easy to control; but for women, especially young women, you must pay special attention so as not to cause disgust or misunderstanding by others.There is also a distinction between extroverts and introverts.

1 minute of little humor and great wisdom
◎ Wolf and Crane
The wolf swallowed a bone, and the bone got stuck in his throat, unable to swallow.So the wolf went to the gray crane and said to the gray crane:

"You take the bone out of my throat, and I'll pay you!"

The gray crane stuck its head into the wolf's mouth, took out the bone with its long beak, and said to the wolf, "Give me a reward!"

The wolf said, "You put your head into my mouth just now, but I didn't bite your head off. Are you not satisfied?"

■In the face of wolf-like greed, maybe we should really be thankful that we realized in time what we shouldn't believe.

◎ Fools and sheep
A man named Bakiri bought a goat for 11 copper coins.He carried the sheep on his shoulders and carried it home with both hands.

On the way, he met an old friend: "How much did you pay for this sheep?"

Bakiri didn't answer, but just stretched his hands forward and expressed "10" with ten fingers. He stretched out his tongue again, and the sum was naturally "11".

However, the goat on his shoulders had already jumped off and disappeared without a trace.

■People who are not good at using their best facilities often get nothing.

◎ Safe swimming method

Recently, a piece of news has been circulating among young people: a "Safe Swimming Guidance Office" has been set up on the street.

When people get together in twos and threes, they discuss: "We have to hurry up and learn how to swim safely."

When school started, everyone sat in front of the teacher, not knowing how to study the Fa.While panicking, the teacher respectfully took out a pen and ink from the back room, drew horizontal lines on everyone's knees, and said:
"I sincerely hope you: never go into water deeper than this line!"

■People who stand on the shore will never learn to swim, only by going deep into it can you get the knowledge you want.

◎ A person who obeys traffic rules

A man is running fast on the road.When others asked him why he ran so fast, he pointed to the street signs and said out of breath:

"Look, it says that the speed limit is 20 kilometers per hour. I can't violate the traffic rules!"

■Don't put pressure on yourself at will, because some things have nothing to do with you.

◎ Take the essence
The editor-in-chief of a French publishing house received a manuscript from a young female novelist one day, along with the original manuscript of the novel, and a large box of marzipan.After reading the manuscript, the editor-in-chief sent her a letter: "Your marzipan is delicious, we accept it; but your novel is too bad, we can't accept it. From now on, just send marzipan."

■Don't try to use one aspect to make up for what you feel is not enough. This is probably in vain, because you bypass the essence of the problem.

◎ Play hard to get
Carew, an old pickpocket who committed crimes in Monte Carlo, was arrested by a seasoned policeman.

The police asked Carew to pay a fine of 100 francs, but he only had 90 francs with him.

"Sir, please take ten francs off."

"No, this is a rule! You must pay 100 francs in full, so, Karou, I will release you for an hour."

■It is inevitable for people to make the mistake of forgetting the purpose itself because they are too attached to the means.

(End of this chapter)