The Complete Works of Xu Zhimo's Classical Prose

Chapter 36 Laughing at Life's Hibiscus Bird (8)
"In an ideal society, I think," Xi Ying said in gossip, "the doctor's income should be proportional to people's health. They should be like insurance companies, guaranteeing the health of their customers, and should be paid when they are sick. Fines or compensation." In Samuel Butler's utopia, sickness was treated as a crime, and the places of treatment were prisons, not hospitals, which were reserved for criminals.Really why do people get sick, they don't use it, and others are troubled?Sometimes when I see the happiness and ease of cats and dogs who don’t suffer from illness, I can’t help but think back to our sinful and civilized human beings, not to mention the distant ancestors whose tails have never degenerated, but the seedlings in Western Hunan, the Paolini newcomers in the Pacific Islands. Human beings, who know and enjoy health and ease, are no longer what our so-called civilized people can dream of.Cough, fallen people, sickness has changed your duty, as for health, it is an exception!

It's okay, you said, if you are sick, there is a doctor, there is medicine, what are you afraid of?See how fast modern medicine and pharmacy are progressing?Let’s talk about Beijing, what is the most decent and expensive house?Hospital!What is the most respectable and lucrative career?doctor!Equipment, surgery, conditioning, fee collection, everything is top-notch!Illness, fear of illness, as long as you have money, it is even better if you have power!

Yes, our faith in science, especially in medicine, is boundless; our faith in foreigners, especially in Western medicine, is boundless.Chinese doctors are actually too difficult. Opening your mouth is metaphysics, and shutting your mouth is still metaphysics. What kind of temper invades the lungs, lung qi invades the liver, liver qi invades the kidneys, and kidney qi invades the spleen again. Anyone who has an Aipixi brain, listen Get used to this nonsense?Their long ebony-rimmed nails and opium-stained tone cannot reassure you, let alone trust them!The doctors who also wear foreign clothes are beautiful enough, they speak with confidence, they are sick, those who should eat yellow balls should not eat black balls, they are sweet and crispy enough, only for their clean bodies and faces With the calm and authoritative facial expression, the patient feels much refreshed! "The meaning of the doctor" is an old saying; but we have to enter a modern large hospital to understand the meaning of that saying.

Thank you to those great kings who roll into a gold ingot every second on average. They want to "keep their fragrance" when they have money but can't use it, just like the emperor who wants to become a fairy, and takes countless money to share in distress In the country of half-civilized nations, churches are built to promote the gospel to save their souls, and hospitals are built to promote benevolence to save their ailments.And this is not in vain; what they recycle is either fame or profit, and most of the time it is both fame and fortune.Why not, I do the same when I have money.

Personally, I have always unconditionally believed in Western medicine and worshiped foreign hospitals, but recently I have heard many words one after another, and I can't help but start to have questions.I only talk about doubts, not about stopping worship, and that is still a long way off.In Beijing, some hospitals are nicknamed "Advanced Taiji", and some are nicknamed "a branch of a certain university". Take care of its other side effects.But in fact, it happens that they often disappoint us in their most important function, that is, for the sake of the whole society and their own reputation, sometimes we have to speak out to remind them.We only talk about reminders, and never dare to use words such as advice or even warnings and reprimands; because how can we not appreciate their kindness in being here to facilitate us?
Let's talk about Concord.Because Xiehe, as far as I know, isn't it the hospital with the strongest capital, the most equipment, and the most talented people among the hospitals in this city?And it's one of the most conscientious places we can trust.The money it spends in a year, and the people healed in a year, although I don't know the truth, it must be an astonishing amount.But we're going to see its grades.Strange to say, maybe the reason is that people's nature is ungrateful, maybe its "popularity" is particularly bad, as far as I know, all the patients who have consulted Xiehe are almost the same, maybe they are more or less inconsistent, and there are complaints.The nature of these complaints is inconsistent. In summary, there are several types:
([-]) Racial boundaries

This is to say that when you see a doctor, you first look at whether your skin is white or yellow; to be fair, all foreigners receive all the treatment they expect, without ambiguity at all, but if you are unfortunately yellow-faced, then you have to take advantage of the doctors. Be happy, they can treat you as they like.It is said that the Chinese employed in the hospital, from the self-help to the cleaning staff, all said that there is a big difference between foreign patients!It turns out that there is a basis for this. As long as the fallacy of Nordic people's superiority is not broken, we will have to endure this kind of unequal treatment every day.The first purpose of setting up foreign hospitals in China is of course to serve foreigners. It’s good to have your turn. No one told you that you can’t live up to your expectations. There are patients who don’t know how to treat them!

([-]) Different powers

There are differences among the same Chinese, but there are good reasons for the difference: rich and powerful patients receive high-quality treatment as usual, while ordinary or even poor patients are only treated as patients.This is a common human nature that can be expressed everywhere and at any time, and whoever is low-key has no sense of humor, although in theory at least the hospital seems to be "equal to all."We have heard stories about the mothers entering the hospital who are left in the room without anyone to consult, and when the time comes, the child comes down by itself, and the doctor is not as good as the story!

([-]) Scientific spirit

This means taking the patient as a test object, or as a specimen.You go to see your eyes, a doctor or student came to check it out; secondly a doctor or student came to check it out again; three doctors or students came again, but who is in charge of checking it? You'd have to take a long detour to find out the disease, even if you could.They may have come to see a doctor for themselves, but it's not like seeing a doctor for a sick person.That is also reasonable, but under such circumstances, Xiying's gossip is funny, the hospital should pay the money, not the patient!

([-]) Careless negligence

The logic of ordinary people is inaccurate. They often conclude that the theories and methods represented by a doctor are undesirable because of his occasional negligence.Many people deduce that science is not established from very small off-topic reasons.This is dangerous.Doctors said that it is common to jump from new medical skills to Dangshen Huangqi, from Dangshen Huangqi to Zhu Youke Fushui, from Fushui to asking pigs to burn paper. We are worried about civilization, and those who expect "progress" should not reward this The trend of "reversing the car".But at the same time, unfortunately, the doctors of the new school, who are responsible for science, tend to be careless, and the result is many mistakes.Negligence in examinations, errors in diagnosis, and sloppy operations are among the causes of disappointment to patients.But what kind of thing is medical treatment? The difference between one action can cost lives. Even if we are in large numbers, we cannot endure unnecessary disasters.

The recent death of an agricultural university student was reported to be ([-]) due to untimely medical treatment, and ([-]) due to inadvertent pathogenic bacteria entering the blood during surgery.How can we not protest in such a situation?

Another example is that Mr. Liang Rengong lost his waist in vain this time, which is almost too ridiculous.Before Mr. Liang underwent surgery, those who saw him knew that his spirit was strong enough and his complexion was radiant enough.The most capable doctor in Xiehe made an unquestionable diagnosis for him, saying that if one kidney is cut, the root of the disease will be removed.The waist was cut and the disease was not cut.Then the cause of the disease is in the tooth; cut the tooth again, from one to seven, the disease is still not cut.So the disease is in the stomach; if you are hungry and deflated, try to be deflated, but the disease is still not deflated, then why is there bleeding?The last answer is actually wonderful, saying it is bleeding without cause: Essential Hoematuria.So after a long time, I discovered that it was neither kidney ulcer (Kidney Farmour) nor teeth: the reason was for no reason!We are complete laymen, how can we understand the mystery of this? If an insider makes a mistake, only the insider is allowed to criticize it. Then it is the turn of the layman to talk too much!But this is Xiehe's sense of responsibility, this is their opinion, their skills and means!

The notes of Mr. Liang Zhongce are attached at the back. The whole process of this treatment, especially the attitude of the client, is described in detail. There are many intriguing places. You can see for yourself.But one thing is clear, the parties involved in Xiehe will inevitably be blamed for negligence in diagnosis.We did not bring up the discussion just because Mr. Liang is Mr. Liang, but this time because Mr. Liang worked very hard in Xiehe, the result was almost a big mess. Our belief in Xiehe, at least my own, is more or less unavoidable There is a need for correction. "It is better to have no doctor than to believe in medicine" is true!But we don't want a group of people to feel derailed because of this: it is wrong to doubt medicine and even science itself. The parties may not explain it sometimes, but modern medicine has explained it. We must not confuse it.And a layman is a layman after all. It is hard to say what happened to Mr. Liang this time. The person involved has a convincing statement, and we don't know it.But if there is reason to say, we are thinking about Xiehe, the doctor who cut Mr. Liang's waist, and the general public's attitude towards Xiehe and even Western medicine. It happens that Mr. Liang's medical records are almost known to everyone, so we dare not ask for it. , I also hope that the parties involved in Xiehe can give us a considerable explanation.It is also good for us laymen to gain insight from this!

Otherwise, wouldn't we all have to hesitate in the future: what should we do if we are sick?
Originally published on August 1926, 5, "Morning News Supplement"

自剖
I am an active person; every time my body moves, my mind seems to dance with it.Many of the poems I wrote, no matter how "boring" they are, came to mind during my travels.I love moving, watching moving things, lively people, water, birds in the sky, and the fields and landscapes passing by the car window.The flickering of starlight, the trembling of dewdrops on the grass blades, the swaying of flower whiskers in the breeze, the change of clouds and sky during thunderstorms, and the turbulent waves of the sea are all moving my heart.It is movement, no matter what its nature is, it is my interest and my inspiration.Just moving quickens my breathing and adds to my life.

Recently, however, it has changed greatly.First of all, my own limbs are not as flexible as before; my heart also feels the restraint of age or something.The phenomenon of movement can no longer give me joy or enlightenment.Before, when I looked at the golden waves shining in the sunlight, it was as if I saw some absurd and beautiful hallucinations of fairy palaces, which did not flash in my mind; now it is different, the sun is just sunlight, and the waves are just waves, regardless of the scenery What kind of brilliance can no longer illuminate my dull heart.My thoughts, if they happen occasionally, are just like vines on a rock, clinging to the dry rough stone surface with great difficulty; the color is dark, and the posture is strong.

I myself don't understand why this change came so suddenly and so profoundly.At first, I felt that I was a flowing spring in front of people, with droplets and flashes; now, as if the spring is still there, it seems that a stone slab has stopped it without leaving a gap.I no longer have the vigorous interest as before, every time I want to speak, I feel the weight of the stone, I can't lift it, I can't push it away, so I can only calm down and keep silent! "You don't have to think anymore, you have nothing to think about anymore"; "You don't have to speak anymore, you have nothing to say anymore", I often feel that there is such a half-sarcasm, half-sarcasm in my dull heart. Condolences.

Speaking of which, I will not experience any overly severe halberd stabbing either in thought or experience.My situation has always been smooth, and now, if it is different, it is only smoother.So why this change?Leaving aside, it’s like my state of mind when I went to Europe years ago: Ah!Was I not a wild deer with antlers then?What color does not excite my sight, what fragrance does not excite my sense of smell?I remember when I was writing travel notes in Italy, how lively my emotions were, how mellow my interests were, and all the things I saw, heard, and felt all the way, gathered in my pen, striving for full expression!What about now?I went to the south this time, and it took more than a month to go back and forth. During this period, there must be a lot of things that I saw, heard, and felt.Before I leave, why don't I feel happy that I can have the opportunity to feast on the beauty of the West Lake here. Deng Wei's plum fragrance singles out one or two things that suit my taste the most.Many friends also expected me to collect a little Jiangnan humor during this leisure vacation. When I return, I should bring back at least one or two refreshing poems and essays, so as to give some sober entertainment to my friends who survived in the muddy air of Beijing.But in fact, not only did I keep my eyes wide open when I was in Nanzhong, I watched the dawn change to dusk, and then I closed my eyes again, fighting to make the dusk change to dawn, a bald pen followed me across the sea, and followed me back across the sea, just like A stalagmite in a cave has never been shaken at all; just ten days after I returned to Beijing, no matter how much my friends urged me and my own conscience blamed me, I still couldn’t get a drop of ink from the tip of my pen. Shen Lai.I will also try to think about it, try to write it, but it is still in vain!The frightening thing is the sudden froze of the mind.Completely dead?I am wondering myself.

It may be related to the current situation.Within a few days of my arrival in Beijing, there was an unprecedented massacre.When the May [-]th incident happened, I was in the mountains of Italy, picking jasmine flowers and playing with weaving flower baskets. In the Emerald Mountains, I could only see stars and fireflies mingling.It was not until I arrived in London in July that I paid attention to the bleakness of the domestic scenery. When I hurried back, the enthusiasm I had imagined had long since become a thing of the past. "Weep!"
This time it was different.The fact of the massacre was not only discovered in the city where I lived, but sometimes I even felt that it was a tragic phenomenon in my own spiritual palace.It was not only the lives of the young people that were killed, but my own thoughts also seemed to have suffered a fatal blow, like a broken limb in front of the State Council, which could no longer regain vividness and coherence.But this profound suffering is unknown to me and cannot be fully explained.It is one thing that the tragic nature of the event arouses indignation and pathos, but at the same time we know that in this fundamentally abnormal society, all sorts of grotesque situations are possible.The massacre of innocents is not the most common phenomenon in recent years.Since the entanglement of the civil war, in the war-torn area, which village has not been allocated raped women, slaughtered flesh and blood, and sacrificed life and property?This is nothing more than adding a more concentrated and brighter resentment to the ground where the grievances are united.Besides, can the liberation history of that nation not be heavily stained with the blood of Martyrs?The opening of the Russian Revolution was the scene of blood in the Winter Palace 20 years ago.As long as we have the power to recognize and have the courage to carry out our ideal revolution, the blood of the lamb will not be in vain this time.So my personal dullness was by no means entirely the emotional effect of this tragedy.

It is in my nature to love peace.In the atmosphere of resentment, suspicion, and murder, my nerves often feel an indescribable oppression.I remember that the days I lived during the Fengzhi War the year before last were a mass of black paint. Every night when it got darker, I hugged my head and fell on the desk alone to suffer, as if the dullness of the whole era covered my head until I wrote "Poison" After those few shapeless curse poems, the tension in my heart gradually eased.This time it was the same situation again; I only felt bored and bored, when the feeling came I was just broken, and the pen was just clumsy.As a result, my body was not feeling well, as if wax oil had smeared my hair orifices all over my body, I was sad. Day after day, I was repeating the posture of sitting alone and tightening my head again. The bright moonlight outside the window was clearly mocking The embarrassment of my heart!
No, I have to go deeper.I can't make the current situation responsible for my sudden pause in thinking, I have to go to the bottom of my own life.

Usually there are several reasons that can affect our mental activities.The constraints of practical life can rob our minds of much-needed leisure and accumulate into a kind of oppression.When a certain fervent desire is not satisfied, we feel mentally bored and anxious, and disappointment is a major cause of subverting the inner balance; more intense types can paralyze our intelligence and overwhelm our rationality.But these are not the cause of my illness; because I have been very lucky in real life, in my subconscious mind, I dare say that there should be no suppressed desires at work.

But actually looking at it the other way around, there is another situation that can block or reduce the activity of your mind.We know that comfort, health, and happiness are the goals of life, so we presume that the starting point of our suffering is when we see those goals but can't get them.We often hear people say, "If I live a carefree life like someone, I will be able to do things well, instead of spending all my energy on trivial troubles." We also hear that "I can't do things because my health is too bad." , if the spirit comes, then..." We often imagine the state of happiness, we think: "As long as there is a person I like in front of me, I will work hard, what can I not do?" But no, in fact, comfortable and healthy Happiness, not only is not necessarily a condition of helping or rewarding the life of the mind, they sometimes have the opposite effect.We look down on the rich, those who are proud of themselves in society, and athletes with overdeveloped muscles are also here; as for the happiness in the fantasy of young people, I dare say that if you really have red sleeves, you will not be able to read your book So let's not talk about more serious work in learning or art.

So is the satisfaction of life the source of my illness?
(End of this chapter)