Eloquence Psychological Manipulation: Improving Language Ability and Improving the Quality of Life

Chapter 31 Family Manipulation: Adding Language to Life (2)
After a while, I suddenly heard someone over there asking the stewardess for a drink and swearing.Looking over, it turned out to be a parrot. It was also strange that the flight attendant obediently served the drink to the parrot.Unexpectedly, the parrot still refused to give up, and continued to swear and ask for this and that. Every time he scolded, the flight attendant rushed to deliver something.The passenger was suddenly enlightened, it turned out that the stewardess was hard-pressed, so she had to scold her!So the passenger imitated the appearance of a parrot and cursed. Sure enough, the flight attendant brought him the drink he wanted.Now the passengers were happy, and they kept cursing and asking the stewardess for this and that.

Just as the passenger was scolding vigorously, the captain came out from the cockpit, grabbed the passenger and threw him out of the plane.The unlucky passenger fell from the sky and couldn't figure it out.But soon, the plane door opened again, and the parrot was thrown out.

The parrot flew to the passenger, flew around him a few times, and said in surprise: "So you can't fly? Then what are you doing on the plane?"

This fable brings more than humorous fun to people. After laughing, the husband realized his problem, so he changed his past.

There is no lack of humor between husband and wife. Only by relaxing can the love be sweeter and the marriage stronger.

Humorous language can release our inner tension and pressure and turn it into a relaxed smile.In communication, humorous language is like a lubricant, which can effectively reduce the "coefficient of friction" between people, resolve conflicts and contradictions, and enable us to calmly get rid of possible difficulties in communication.

The better the invisible protective agent of humor works, the more it can maintain the mental and physical balance that the individual needs.Those who live happily are no more favored by fate than anyone else, and can be spared the hardships of life, which treats everyone equally.The biggest characteristic of those who are always happy is that they have learned to deal with the ups and downs of life with a humorous attitude.The same is true of family happiness and harmony.

Humor is the most brilliant psychological manipulation technique, it is the lubricant of harsh reality, it can reduce the friction between each other, and its function exceeds the limit that other methods cannot surpass.When getting along with family members, it is inevitable that there will be frictions of one kind or another. Our aim is to make big things small and small things small.There is no better way to address these matters than with humor.This not only resolves conflicts, but also avoids disputes, making the family more harmonious and warm.

5. Old couples also need sweet talk
If love is compared to the cornerstone of the relationship between husband and wife, then the love language full of love is an indispensable lubricant between husband and wife.Love language full of love is the best combination of true love heart and proper language.Although the love language between husband and wife is not as passionate as that between lovers, it is like old wine, sweet and mellow, and has a long aftertaste.

Usually, the love language between husband and wife has the following forms.

1. Express love directly.After stepping into the palace of marriage, the love has changed from the vigor and vitality before and gradually tends to be flat and warm.At this time, although the husband and wife no longer talk about words like "I love you", they can't put them on the shelf.At a certain moment, an emotional "I love you" will evoke many good memories of the other party and arouse ripples of love in each other's hearts.This is of great benefit to deepening the relationship between husband and wife.

There is a middle-aged couple who are usually very busy at work and don't have many opportunities to talk.But every night when they come home from get off work or on their day off, they always talk about love topics.Watch TV dramas together, and when we see the love plot of men and women in the drama, we will recall the good times when they fell in love together and talk about those sweet experiences.Catch up with each other's birthdays and common anniversaries, and hold some small activities to spend happy time together, so as to deepen each other's feelings.

Don't think that expressing love between husband and wife is superfluous, it can always stir up ripples in ordinary life.However, in real life, many people ignore this point, so they always feel that the life after marriage is ordinary, without passion, and some even fall into emotional crisis.In fact, sometimes, a straight expression of love "I love you" or a sentence of "I miss you" when we say goodbye may be just a "mouth" for you, but it is very warm for the other party.So don't begrudge your sweet words, use them to add more sweetness to your married life.

2. Loving humor.Humorous people often use jokes to amuse everyone and create a joyful and harmonious family atmosphere.As soon as some couples enter the house, they tell their lovers anecdotes, especially the wives, who always bring back what they think are the most interesting and tell their husbands. There is always laughter at home, which reflects the deep love.

With humorous language in busy life, it will adjust mood, relieve the pressure of work and life, and share each other's pain. These are the language expressions of love.

There was a couple who had a conflict because of a trivial matter. The wife was angry and refused to eat, and ignored her husband.The husband quickly coaxed his wife: "Being angry makes people grow old, and when you worry about it, your hair turns gray. Do you want to have an old wife and a young husband?" The wife was amused.

The husband said again: "That's right, you're young when you smile ten years ago, and you're old when you smile ten times!" The wife's resentment disappeared immediately, and she said coquettishly, "Humph, I'll be talkative!"

3. Thoughtful words of love.Languages ​​full of love do not necessarily have to be marked with the word "love". Languages ​​such as concern, caring, support, and blessings also contain love, and no one is unwilling to listen to them.

For example, everyone is usually busy with their own work, and their investment in the family is relatively less.But no matter how busy you are, remember to send a small gift or a bouquet of flowers to your lover on his birthday, plus a small card, on which you can write some sincere and moving words to express your gratitude and gratitude to your lover for supporting your work. The meaning of blessing, the lover must be very moved when he hears it, and the fountain of happiness flows in his heart.

If you are considerate and caring, your lover will feel more lovely, and your family life will be more warm.

Sweet talk is not exclusive to young people in love. Marriage does not mean that they have lost the right to enjoy love, and of course it does not mean that they no longer need to fulfill the obligation to express love.Marriage is not the end of love. If there is love, there is no lack of sweet words and sweet words. The sweet words full of love between old couples can make the other half who is busy working for you feel happy and gratified, and the road of love will be longer and more complete. .

6. Parents also need to coax

In modern times, children often say that there is a generation gap with their parents.I have to admit that parents are somewhat out of touch with society because of their age.The friction between parents and children in the family is mostly the ideological differences between the two generations, and it is not easy to solve.However, if the elders are stubborn and the younger ones are stubborn, and everyone thinks they are right, debates will always be unavoidable, but the problem will not be resolved, and the conflict will further intensify.

As a child, how to persuade parents and how to make parents happy is the responsibility of being a child. Of course, this also requires very good skills.

1. To be courteous, to befriend.To be courteous to parents is not to be hypocritical, but to truly honor them.Although parents have many shortcomings, children should love them sincerely, care about their well-being and health, and relieve their worries.Communicate with them in a sincere, polite, and cordial manner.

What needs to be reminded is that when your parents ask you something, a good opportunity to "show courteousness" will come to your door. At this time, you must answer or explain it patiently and seriously, so that you will definitely get more love and affection from your parents.The elders always want to know more about the life of the younger generation, you just need to chat with them patiently, don't think they are nagging, they are nagging because they love you and want to integrate into your life.

Ordinary people should respect each other, let alone our parents.And this kind of respect, a very important aspect is to often ask parents for advice and discuss issues.In addition to those issues that you can expect to be obviously different from your parents' views, and you must stick to your own opinions, you should always discuss with them and listen to their opinions. Parents have rich life experiences. It is undoubtedly beneficial to seek their opinion.Even if you clearly know that you and your parents have absolutely the same views, you might as well go through the motions in order to obtain the happy mood that comes when you agree.

2. Be reasonable and say good things.People of different ages naturally have very different ideas. It is common to disagree with parents, but disputes and quarrels are the most stupid ways.It's better to say something pleasant, explain the truth clearly to your parents, and skillfully compare your parents' experience with your current situation, in order to gain their understanding, so that they have no reason to object.

For example, a college graduate wanted to venture into the South, but his parents objected, so he tried to find reasons to persuade his father: "Dad, you often told me that you left your hometown to study in other places when you were 16, and you have achieved today's success through hard work alone." Achievement! Now I am two years older than you at that time, I made this decision under your influence, I think you will understand and support me."

Father was persuaded, and could no longer insist on his opinion.

Under normal circumstances, parents have what they think is a glorious past, and they always use these capitals to educate their children.For grown-up children, when you want to start a career and are hindered by your parents, you can use their experiences and make analogies, and naturally you will be able to get their understanding and support.

3. Use the expectations of your parents as your banner.Parents have high hopes for their children's future, and they often teach their children to dare to venture and do things, and to be a person of accomplishment and achievement in the future.

If you want to get their support, as long as your opinions are consistent with their goals, you can hold on to this banner and never let go, and you will be safe.

A young man who just graduated found a job in a company, but his father objected, thinking that his son should enter a state agency.The young man said: "I have known about this company. It is very promising. It produces high-tech products, which is my major. Besides, the state agency is good, but there are many talents there. If you want to work there I am afraid that there are few opportunities and many difficulties in this business. But this company is different. When I went there, the general manager asked me to get a technical job right away. This is a very good opportunity. I have relied on you since I was a child. Teach me to be independent in everything and learn to think independently. Now that I have grown up, I understand what you said, and I can think and solve problems independently. I think you will support me." Father has nothing to say.

Generally speaking, parents pay great attention to their own dignity, and they will not easily break their promises in the past, and will honor them in time.Therefore, if you want your behavior to get their approval, you can properly use their psychology and use their words as your own banner, so it will be much easier to get their support.

4. The language is modest and the attitude is firm.If you want your parents to agree with you without hurting each other's feelings, let them see that you are determined, and let them understand that you made a choice after careful consideration. Even if this decision is wrong, I am ready to take responsibility alone and will never regret it.Of course, at this time, your tone must be modest, and you can't be impulsive and tense. Not only will it be difficult to end, but the goal will not be achieved.

A resolute attitude will shock the parents strongly, and a modest tone will calm the anger of the parents.Parents can see their children's assertiveness and sense of responsibility, so they will not firmly oppose and make matters worse, but will go along with the flow and accept their children's opinions.

The last thing to point out is that if your opinion is incorrect, or even utterly wrong, what you have to do is not to coax your parents to agree to your request, but to reflect on yourself, and it is best to happily give up your own opinion. opinions, take their opinions into account.Although our parents and our outlook on life and values ​​are different, their love for us is real and unquestionable. If we want to get along well with them and make them live happily, we must communicate more and follow them more.There is no problem worth making our parents angry. To get their understanding and support, we don’t have to fight hard and hold every inch of ground. The positions of parents and children are never opposed, and the problems of parents and children are never the same. can not be resolved.As long as you think more from the perspective of your parents, understand their painstaking efforts more, and coax them with more pleasant words, they will naturally love you more and understand you more, and they will naturally stand by your side when you need support. side.You must believe that your parents are reasonable, and you must believe that they are the best parents in the world.

7. Be a clever daughter-in-law who pleases her mother-in-law
In family life, the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is a pair of special contradictions.To properly handle this pair of contradictions requires the joint efforts of both parties.As the daughter-in-law, you often play a very key role.If you want to be a pleasing daughter-in-law, you must first work hard on speaking.

1. Make it clear that mother-in-law is not an enemy.The mother-in-law is the mother of the husband, and she has no "life-threatening" friendship with her daughter-in-law, but they have to get along and disrespect, so the most appropriate thing is to treat the mother-in-law as the kind of "friend" who keeps a certain distance.There is no need to be cold-eyed, to stare at each other, nor to be intimate and heart-to-heart.If you talk too much from your heart, once you have unhappiness in the future, you will inevitably be regarded as a pigtail.Therefore, the most ideal relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is to treat each other with courtesy.

2. Keep your personality in front of your mother-in-law.If the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law live together and need to get along with each other for a long time, then you can't just play tricks at the beginning. Your current cover-up is laying the groundwork for future discord between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.It's better to expose your own small shortcomings and personality as soon as possible, and calmly face the criticism and accusations of your mother-in-law, and then behave yourself in a timely manner—"I made you laugh again!" "Look at my stinking problem, always I can’t change it!” “It must be an example!”

If you have any bad habits, it’s best not to hide them, but to be open and aboveboard, and show them in a way you don’t think are bad habits. Even if the mother-in-law doesn’t like it, she can only explain it as “she has that temper”, so she won’t take it too seriously.Otherwise, once the fox's tail is accidentally exposed, don't blame her for saying something behind her back.

3. Get along well with mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.Always remind yourself: "Mother-in-law is your husband's real mother, so you can't argue too much with your elders." Especially when something about your mother-in-law makes you dissatisfied, you can avoid having an outburst on the spot and reasoning with your mother-in-law, making the conflict intensified and out of control.In the final analysis, it is actually a sentence: don't have a direct conflict with your mother-in-law.You can't even do stupid things like quarreling. Don't expect to win with your mother-in-law at your husband's place. Your husband won't be able to tell the difference at all, because you are equally important to him.

(End of this chapter)