learn to speak, learn etiquette

Chapter 8 Learning to Speak Humorously (1)
[-]. Humorous language has magical effects

The environment of modern society is changing rapidly, and the speed and efficiency are accelerating sharply. Therefore, modern people often feel a kind of psychological pressure and anxiety.Humor is the best "relief valve".It can not only make you feel relaxed and happy, talk and laugh happily, but also help you to be successful in communication.

Most humorists have a detached taste and a strange way of thinking, that is, they do not recognize the rationality of reality.

Humor is impossible in life.

A good talker must be good at humor.

Humor is the lubricant of interpersonal communication; humor is the "relief valve" of psychological pressure.

It can not only make you feel relaxed and happy, talk and laugh happily, but also help you get twice the result with half the effort in communication.Humorous eloquence has the magical effect of benefiting oneself and pleasing others. On any occasion, a person with good humorous eloquence will always win the favor of others and gain a lot of support and understanding.Another peculiarity of humorous eloquence is that it can relentlessly refute the criticisms of others and defend its own dignity.With humorous eloquence, you have a priceless wealth, which will benefit you for life.

No matter what the occasion, humor and eloquence will bring you surprises and unexpected gains.

Humor is a kind of wisdom in life, which embodies an optimistic and positive way of dealing with the world and an open-minded attitude towards life.

In fact, humor plays many roles in conversation.

1 makes you more popular

Humor comes from life itself.

In ordinary life, it is difficult to have comedians, comedians, cartoonists and other people who specialize in telling jokes to make people laugh.But as long as we carefully observe the many interesting words and behaviors of the people around us, we will be aware and discover something.

With a sense of humor, you can show your intelligence in communication, you can arouse the interest of others, you can ease the tense situation, and you can make everyone happy.

Use humor to cheer up others, and they will be very grateful to you.When you tell a joke, it is like a ray of sunshine dispelling a heavy cloud, and all doubts, depressions, and fears will disappear with a well-placed joke.

A person with a strong sense of humor always has a sense of superiority in social situations. Even in the face of embarrassing situations, he can calmly deal with them and win the applause of others.

2 help to understand philosophy

In speaking, wit and humor subtly combine people's wisdom and language skills, revealing the profundity of things, containing inexhaustible meaning beyond words, making people judge right and wrong with a smile, comprehend philosophy, and increase wisdom.

Humorous language should be healthy and funny, not being able to joke is humorous.Conversation should be subtle, and avoid glib or low-level humor.

Although we cannot strictly require that humorous language must have profound ideological meaning, it must be healthy and must not be vulgar, frivolous, or confused with boring jokes.Laughing at people's physical defects, or talking about sexual topics, not only fails to show your humor, but only reveals your own vulgarity and shallowness.Humor should be based on the maintenance of justice, and it should be conducive to unity and physical and mental health.

Sometimes, the speaker's concealed expression increases the effect of humor. Therefore, skilled eloquence experts advocate that the speech should be contained rather than revealed, and should be light rather than strong.How can a person develop a sense of humor if he laughs so hard that he can't breathe before telling a joke?
In addition, humor should be easy to understand and not too profound, otherwise it will make people puzzled like guessing a puzzle, and the effect of laughter will not be achieved.

Things are moving forward, and people are always only interested in new things.Therefore, even if it is humorous, repeating it over and over can become tiresome.Speech should strive to be novel and undisturbed, which is the knack of humorous conversation.

Mark Twain said, "A sense of humor is not an elusive thing. In recent years, I have spent a lot of effort to find out its ins and outs. How should I put it? Well, if you compare humor to a child, then his parents Mother is life and leisure respectively."

3 Harmonious and active atmosphere

Humorous conversation often makes people laugh, but humorous conversation is also a kind of aesthetic feeling, which gives people the enjoyment of beauty.

A good speaker's humorous words can often not only enliven the atmosphere, but also shorten the distance between the interlocutors.Numerous examples can prove that humor is an effective way and means to establish a harmonious relationship between the speaker and the listener.

Humorous conversation can often make cramped and embarrassing scenes relaxed and gentle, so that both parties can get out of the predicament and eliminate embarrassment.

4 Sophisticated and optimistic life

"Humor belongs to the optimistic person, and humor belongs to the strong in life." This makes sense.Humorous conversation should be based on the speaker's healthy thinking and noble taste.It puts forward well-intentioned criticism and persuasion to people, and it inevitably requires critics to have a higher ideological level and self-cultivation.A narrow-minded, decadent-minded person is not a humorous person, nor does he have a sense of humor.Generally speaking, humorists are characterized by high moral character, open-mindedness, and enthusiasm for people.Countless philosophers in the world have a sense of humor when they talk to people, which makes people feel extraordinarily warm and friendly, which is not unrelated to their optimistic spirit and noble taste.

Many great humorists sometimes do some grotesque and funny things, which is the result of humorous thinking overriding conventional thinking.Simply put, if adults think like children, it will have a strong humorous effect and make people laugh.

5 Give full play to imagination

When a humorist thinks humorously, he brings together two seemingly unconnected things, creating a new coordination in the incongruity, and thus producing humor. This is near-far association.It can be said that near-far association is the basic element of humorous thinking, and also an important factor of creative thinking.

Humorous thinking is a habit that is gradually formed by finding out incongruous factors in coordinated things, keenly observing the changing grotesque combinations in the ordinary, and speaking them out in a very natural tone.

6 Improve life wisdom

A person's humorous conversation is closely related to his intelligence, and his intelligence is often closely related to his cultural upbringing.Therefore, this requires us to have good cultural accomplishment and rich cultural knowledge.If a person has dabbled in various things such as ancient and modern, Chinese and foreign, historical allusions, customs and customs, and has a strong ability to control language, it is easy to speak vividly and interestingly.Masters of humor in ancient and modern China and abroad are all masters of language.Humor is not artificial, but natural.Someone said with deep feeling: "I didn't intend to tell a joke, and the joke came out of my mouth naturally." This is very insightful.

In the vast books of ancient and modern times, especially in works such as satirical novels, comedy books, joke collections and fables, there are many descriptions that are good at humor.We can be inspired by reading a lot of these works. If we can integrate all kinds of knowledge and apply them to real life, it will be humorous.Because humor is a language that emerges from wonderful associations on the basis of extensive knowledge, and sometimes only a few words can explain a lot of problems.People who know very little about all kinds of knowledge in real life, people who have always been ignorant, reclusive or reclusive, have difficulty in speaking properly, and of course they cannot talk about a sense of humor.

Humorous language can also help expose opponent mistakes.

Humor mostly uses insinuations and irony, witty, flexible, and cleverly exposes the shortcomings of others, criticizes in good faith, makes it difficult for people to get angry, and accepts education in laughter.

7. Train to be observant

Quick response is one of the characteristics of humorous conversation, which requires the speaker to be quick in thinking and eloquent.However, these are the results of profound experience of life and careful observation of things.Keen observation is not only a necessary condition in science, but also an important factor in producing humorous conversation.

To speak humorously, it is necessary to achieve "unexpected, reasonable".It is difficult to work without a rich imagination.You must be able to see an ordinary thing from the inside to the outside, from the outside to the inside, and you can bring out the secretive things in a few words.Use your rich imagination to create humor and discover things in everyday life that others have never discovered.Modern people are all imaginative and creative, so don't limit yourself.

A person's sense of humor is always shown in his social activities.The best way to make your own language humorous is to learn from life, there are many people around us with a sense of humor.When interacting with people from all walks of life, you will often unexpectedly find that they use language wonderfully, and their witty expressions are enough to fascinate you.In approaching all kinds of people, you will strengthen your language inventory and speaking ability.If you stay with humorous people, you will be "infected". We must consciously get closer to people with a strong sense of humor.Enhance your sense of humor through contact and conversation.

[-]. How to make yourself speak humorously
I often hear people say that I am born with a stupid mouth and can't be humorous.Is humor really innate?Actually, not so.

Humorous conversation is the crystallization of a person's ideology, wisdom and inspiration in the use of language.To improve the sense of humor in speaking, you can experience the skills of using humorous language from the following fifteen methods.

1 self-contradiction
Most people don't want to say the wrong thing, but sometimes they deliberately say the wrong thing, and the logical contradictions in the speech may produce humor.Because in the case of self-contradiction, the language is unbalanced and the logic is misplaced, so the logical block and the inclination of the language shock us, and the humor is bred in it.

There is an old man who is over 60 years old this year, and he has nothing to do at home after retirement.One day, on a sudden whim, I wanted to make a small bench for my granddaughter.But it was very unfortunate that the carpenter hired by the old man became a monk halfway, and he refused to study hard, so he did a very bad job.The carpenter worked at the old man's house for a whole day, and when he was done, he went to the master to ask for wages.The old man said: "Your work is too slow." The carpenter said: "Didn't you hear that slow work produces fine work?" I gave you three meals for nothing. How about this, I’ll give you this bench as your wages.” The carpenter quit and argued: “Don’t take me for a fool, I don’t want a few dollars, who would want your broken stool? ? The seams are big, the board is slanted, and the four feet are not evenly aligned. What is it worth?"

If a teacher teaches elementary school students, he will definitely ask this question: Is the carpenter smart or stupid?There is no doubt that answers from the paranoid end cannot get full marks.Or should I answer this way, a carpenter is a smart exterior with a stupid core.Of course, after readers and friends read this humorous article, I don’t think anyone will discuss this issue.But this question will definitely arise in your unconscious.For it is the carpenter's clever but stupid defense that makes your face bloom.In this humor, our focus is not on how the old man treats the carpenter, but on how frustrated the old man will be when he sees the poor stool.We focus on the carpenter's own words, because this constitutes the fulcrum of humor, without this fulcrum, the whole humor collapses, and it may become a small story with some social and educational significance, without any sense of humor .

Humor by paradox is generally ironic, but that does not mean that it degenerates into a kind of didacticity; didacticity is repulsive and, in its dry, pale form, does not give pleasure.The support point of this kind of humor is also logically misplaced.

The secret of the self-contradictory humor law is that it breaks the normal thinking law of speech and obtains the effect of comedy by going against the law of abnormality.

2 talk in circles
As a language art, humor is closely related to rhetorical techniques. The euphemistic rhetoric discussed in this topic is one example. It is similar to the euphemistic rhetoric in figures of speech, but "euphemistic" rhetorical methods cannot bring humor to people.For example, the reference room is about to get off work, and a reader is still reluctant to leave. The administrator walks over and says kindly: "It's off work, put a note on the book you want to read, and I will leave it for you to read first tomorrow." .” Here the administrator adopts a tactful language, the language is gentle and reserved, but there is no sense of humor.The humorous method of "Wanyan Qushuo" we are talking about now can be said to be a declension of "Wanqu", which means that the speaker deliberately expresses the original intention in a roundabout way, and uses euphemism to obtain humorous effects.

Mr. Keno came to a strange city and went into a small hotel, where he wanted to spend the night.

"How much is a single room with breakfast?" he asked the innkeeper.

"A variety of different rooms have different prices. The room on the second floor is 15 marks a day, the room on the third floor is 12 marks a day, the fourth floor is 10 marks, and the fifth floor only costs 7 marks."

Mr. Keno considered for a few minutes, then picked up the box and left.

"Do you think the price is too high?" the boss asked.

"No," Keno replied, "your house isn't tall enough."

Generally speaking, humor should avoid hostility and conflict, otherwise, humor will be weakened or die.In this sense, euphemisms are suitable for humor.

In this example, if Keno bluntly said: "Your house price is too high, I can't live anymore", then the humor will die immediately, and the story itself will lose its existence value.The sense of humor in Keno's discourse comes from the offensive edge of blunting language.He didn't vent his dissatisfaction with the house price directly, so the relationship between him and the boss didn't freeze.He expresses his intentions in a more effective way than bluntly, avoiding confrontation and rigidity in interpersonal relationships, and is extremely humorous.

Euphemistically speaking is sometimes saying something related to the original intention, or something similar, to hint at the original meaning from the side.

3 word sense transfer method
The world is full of misunderstandings, and carefully crafted misunderstandings shape a colorful language world.It can be said that the world of humor is made of misunderstandings.Absolutely, there is no humor without misunderstanding.Misunderstanding is a shift in semantics. Words are misunderstood from the first meaning to the second meaning, leading to semantic transfer and forming a humorous dialogue situation.Words that may cause ambiguity are the bridge to produce this artistic conception.Lack of understanding and lack of knowledge are enough to cause misunderstandings. Of course, there are also intentional misunderstandings.The humor composed of misunderstandings mostly ridicules the lack of wisdom, so the protagonists in this kind of humor are mostly people or children with defects in character.

There was a medical student who failed his final exam.In order to give him a chance to pass the make-up exam, the teacher asked a very simple question:

"Who is the author of "Compendium of Materia Medica"?"

Unexpectedly, the student did not respond to this.

The teacher shouted angrily, "Li Shizhen, did you hear that?"

After hearing this, the student hurried away. The teacher stopped him in surprise and asked, "Hey, why are you leaving?"

"Aren't you already calling the next candidate?"

the student replied.

The meaning of the word "Li Shizhen" is very clear, but here it has become a word that causes ambiguity. The possibility of ambiguity is that the examinee is usually poor in study, and even the most basic common sense - "Materia Medica" The author of "Compendium" is Li Shizhen.People both "laughed" and "ridiculed" this student. In terms of his wit and wit in this "comedy", he was caused by mistakes, passive everywhere, and did not become the master of humor.It is built on the intersection of "joy" and "sorrow". People laugh at the embarrassment of the examination room and lament the lack of academics.

Among some of these humors, some do not necessarily have any ideological content, but constitute humor purely by misunderstanding, which can be said to be playing humor.

There is a couple who have a bad relationship and each has an affair.One day, the couple were sleeping, and the wife suddenly screamed in panic in her dream: "My God! You go, my husband is back!"

The husband woke up suddenly, quickly put on his shoes and said, "Oops! I'm leaving now!" and ran away in a hurry.

The husband and wife have their own ghosts, which is the prerequisite for misunderstanding, and the words that the wife screamed in panic are the catalyst for misunderstanding.What the wife said in her dream was originally a "mistake", but the husband took the "mistake" as true, so he "mistaked" again and made a wrong judgment: "Oops! I'm leaving!" At the same time, he took the wrong action: escape .Mistakes again and again created a special dialogue situation, which made readers feel surprised and shocked, and naturally couldn't help laughing.

Misunderstandings also often occur when the characters in the story lack thinking and judgment, and mechanically understand what others say, so that they "pull the boat with the flow" and make jokes.

A customer sits at a table in an upscale restaurant with his napkin tied around his neck.The manager was disgusted, called a waiter and said, "This is absolutely not allowed. But try to be as tactful as possible."

The waiter came to the man's table and asked politely, "Sir, do you want to shave or cut your hair?"

The receptionist misunderstood the manager's "instructions". The manager meant to ask the receptionist to politely tell customers not to tie their napkins around their necks.There are two factors that lead to the misunderstanding of the receptionist: one is his mental inertia, he does not think and judge the manager's "instructions"; the other is that the customer has already tied the napkin around his neck.The manager said to be "tactful", so well, follow the trend: "Are you shaving or getting a haircut?" - because no matter whether you shave or get a haircut, you need to wear a scarf.The task assigned by the manager was not completed, but it was wrong because of mistakes.

In the vast language world, there are many kinds of misunderstandings, but only those carefully constructed have humorous value.Otherwise, if you say it casually, at most it will have a comic effect.This requires us to skillfully use misunderstandings and witty language in our daily conversations to achieve humorous effects.

4 expect transfer method
In the psychological mechanism of humor, there is a principle called the principle of inconsistency.It tells us that the structure of humor is characterized by unexpected emotional turns.As long as people's imagination and psychological expectations are fully induced, and then the result is suddenly transformed, it can cause laughter.

A French publisher wanted to be praised by a famous author in order to increase his own value.He thought that in order to gain the favor of a big man, he must be praised first.

(End of this chapter)