Hypnosis: Psychological tricks in life

Chapter 17 Hypnotic Tricks in Life (4)
To praise others, one should have a kind of "invincible" confidence.Everyone has weaknesses, no matter how humble, no matter how unkind, no matter how much they advertise that they don't like to listen to sweet words, they all like to be flattered by others, but it must be appropriate.For example, when a salesperson and a customer have a dispute over product quality and price, the salesperson changes the subject and praises the customer for his insight. The style of the clothes is the latest, the fabric is good, and they are particularly popular.Let's praise her for being eloquent and really good at bargaining. We have never had such a low price here.Customers must like to hear it, and I am sorry to continue to fight, maybe they will buy it soon.

Everyone has their own strengths, and this aspect is often acquired by him after spending energy. If you acknowledge this aspect of him, and show some humility, show him the meaning of asking for advice, and fully demonstrate your strengths to him. He will be delighted by the chance.

In addition to being proficient in his own business, Director Wu also has a lot of research on calligraphy.Once, Xiao Ding, a subordinate, went to visit him and happened to meet him writing. "Oh, I didn't expect Mr. Wu's handwriting to be so good." The shrewd Xiao Ding looked like he had discovered the new world.

"Where is it? It's just scribbling." Mr. Wu is very humble. "I also learned calligraphy for two years before, but I couldn't get it right. I don't know what trick Mr. Wu has, can you teach me?" Xiao Ding asked humbly. "You like calligraphy too? That's great!"

As if meeting a confidant, Mr. Wu excitedly spoke to his subordinates.

Next, the host and guest naturally talked very speculatively.Before leaving, Mr. Wu also gave Xiaoding a pair of his own words.Xiao Ding hangs it in his office, of course it adds a lot of honor, Director Wu also likes him even more.

Vanity is human nature, and its desire to be satisfied is strong. When we communicate with others, we can first understand the vanity of the other party, and then use some appropriate words to satisfy this vanity. will be very useful.

Pretend to be considerate of others, and speak to the other party's mind in one sentence.

As for how to effectively persuade others, Ford, the American car king, once said: "If there is any secret to success, it is to put yourself in other people's shoes and understand their attitudes and viewpoints." , and can more clearly understand the other party's thought trajectory and the "key points" in it, aim at the target and hit the "key points", so that your influence will be greatly improved.

Someone once said that in order for others to believe that you are right and act on your opinion, they must first like you, otherwise you will fail.But if I can't put myself in other people's shoes, how can I make them like it?When persuading, not considering the position of the other party, or finding some inexplicable reasons to prevaricate, will make things more difficult to deal with.The reason why there are frequent quarrels between superiors and superiors is that both parties only consider their own positions.It is not easy to speak from the standpoint of the other party.

A staff member who often smoked in the office once vowed to quit smoking. After a month, he couldn't help smoking again.At first, the boss thought: "Didn't you say you don't smoke? Why do you start smoking again?" But he changed his tone and said: "It's not easy to quit smoking. It's not easy if you can persist for more than a month!" Subordinates Hearing this, you will definitely feel ashamed, and make up your mind to quit smoking resolutely.

It is easy for employees to understand what the boss said.Because the boss is thinking for him, knowing that quitting smoking is not easy, even if he smokes once in a while, it is understandable.Such a statement not only disqualifies the employee, but also makes the employee determined not to make the same mistake again.

Similarly, there is a TV station that sets up a weekly program of lectures on life issues, and its ratings are much higher than programs at other times.Of course, there are many reasons for the high ratings, but the most important reason is that the audience appreciates the ingenious answers in the program.

Most of the viewers who come to TV for advice with difficult questions will initially refute or justify the various advices given by the answerers, and appear very reluctant to accept what the other party said.But as time went by, I unknowingly nodded and agreed to every word the answerer said, watching the TV screen, I felt that it was better than watching a movie in the cinema.

All TV hosts or questioners are carefully selected, so just listening to their persuasive methods can also benefit a lot.

For people who are not easy to persuade, the best way is to make the other person think that you and him are on the same side.Divorced women make up the majority of the viewers who usually appear on such TV programs that explore life-related issues.At this time, the person who is responsible for answering the question often says: "If I were you, I would forgive you and never break up with him."

Don't think that the "if I were you" in the words is just a short and simple sentence, the effect it can exert is absolutely limitless!This is also due to the mentality that everyone thinks "I am the cutest".If you inadvertently use some inappropriate words in the process of persuading others, then you can make up for your verbal mistakes by skillfully using this "if I were you".Not only that, but it can also prompt the other party to do self-reflection and finally feel that only your honest advice is in his best interest.

Use embellishments skillfully in your conversation.

The words you use are important in order to increase your impact in a conversation.In fact, choosing different words for different people is a very important conversation skill.The following aspects need to be paid attention to in the proper use of vocabulary:
1. Echo in the valley.The "empty valley echo" here refers to using the words spoken by the other party, a certain term, slang or colloquial language that the other party just said, and you can immediately use it in what you said, which will make the other party feel very kind.Especially for some terms or slang, using the words spoken by the other party can show great support and affirmation for the other party.

2. Sense words.You have to grasp that people with different sensory preferences also have preferences for different vocabulary.Different types of people are accustomed to using different sensory words. You should pay more attention to their preferences when listening to the other party. Those vocabulary types that are customary.

3. Idioms.Idioms, commonly known as mantras, are words that a person habitually uses.Some catchphrases are fashionable buzzwords, and some are very personal.No matter what kind of idioms, if you want to increase your influence, you can actively use it when talking to the other party, and you can even use it more frequently than the other party.This kind and intimate feeling will surprise the other party, because you and the other party have the same idioms, and the other party will think that you two have similar concepts, personalities, and lives.

4. Words to avoid.There are certain words that should be avoided as much as possible in conversation.In order not to arouse the other party's disgust and avoid disputes, if you want to increase your influence, you can try to use more neutral words when speaking, and don't speak too much.The choice of words also requires keen insight, especially paying more attention to the language details in the other party's speech.

5. Do not use overlapping sentences.Some people will say: "Why, why?" It is enough to promise others one thing and say one or at most two "good" words, but some people say "good, good, good..." or "goodbye, goodbye".In fact, you want to improve your influence. When using overlapping sentences, you only need to use them when you want to attract special attention or strengthen your power.
6. The same noun cannot be used too much.No matter what kind of novel and pleasing noun, if it is used too much, it will lose its moving value.Wilde said: "The first time to use flowers to describe a woman is the smartest person, and the second time to use it is stupid." , it is necessary to create a new term, but it is tiresome to use a noun repeatedly in the same period.

Also, be careful not to use the same adjective to describe different things.

Do what you like, and act when the time is right.

In life, there will be big and small things in every family, such as illness, weddings and funerals, buying a house and moving, wife and children transferring jobs, as well as borrowing, buying and selling, mediating various disputes, legal lawsuits, etc.These all sorts of private matters, sometimes as ordinary people, we may not be able to handle them by ourselves, and when we have no choice, we need to ask the leaders to help them handle and solve them.

It stands to reason that the leader is the leader in the unit and the leader in work, and the private affairs of the subordinates are not within the scope of his jurisdiction. It is reasonable to ignore or not help, but it is also possible because of the relationship between the superior and the superior. To ask, to help.In the scope of our life and communication, leadership is like a big tree. Only by making good use of this relationship of leadership can we solve problems and obstacles more smoothly.But if you ask the leader to help you with your personal affairs, you have to grasp a certain measure and method.

Xiao Du graduated from university and was assigned to work in the countryside, while his wife worked in the city, and the couple lived apart for a long time.In order to go back to the city and go through the "front door" for official business, Xiao Du made many calls and reports, but it was useless; he opened up the "joints" and went through the "back door" to entertain guests and give gifts.

When he reported to the director several times, the director often played games with others on the Go board and ignored him.Xiao Du had no choice but to stand by and watch the battle.Strange to say, the director is not interested in winning chess, but is very interested in losing chess. The masters in the chess world are frequent visitors to his house.However, to win the director's game, few people could be found.

Therefore, Xiao Du realized from it that he wanted to "kill" the director by playing chess and transfer him back to the city.So, he bought books, paid homage to famous teachers, watched chess records, and devoted himself to studying Go skills. In less than half a year, he really practiced a good chess skill.When I was looking for the director again, I started to "observe the battle", then became a "military adviser", and then "participated in the war". After several confrontations, the director was defeated, which attracted the director's attention.

From then on, Xiao Du often stayed by the director's side. Later, before he could speak, the director took the initiative to care about his transfer and stamped the transfer letter without hesitation. Soon Xiao Du and his wife were reunited.Xiao Du catered to the director's love, and through the contest of attack and defense on the chessboard, he improved his understanding, and he and the director had a personal friendship with each other, and established a relationship like a friend, which made it much easier to go back to the city.

It is not a simple matter to ask the leader to do your personal affairs for you, it requires a certain measure and skill.Properly praise and "hold" the leader.If you speak nicely and properly, the leader will be easy to accept your conditions and requirements, so learn to say compliments.You should spit out your own difficulties in a reasonable, neither humble nor overbearing manner, and pierce your skin to induce sympathy from your superiors, so as to help you do well what you ask them to do.

Stimulate the "responsibility" of leaders in terms of "reason".When asking the leader to handle private affairs, try to link your personal affairs with work so that the leader feels that he is helping you to solve problems at work.When asking the leader to do something, you might as well make a friend with the leader first, and let him help you as a friend.Of course, it is not easy to make friends with leaders, and using common hobbies to approach leaders is a very effective way.

When entrusting the leader to do private affairs, one must watch the timing and grasp the heat, especially the mood of the leader.Don't go to him if he's in a bad mood, busy with work, or in the middle of a meal, etc.Because at these times, if you talk about issues that are not related to work, he will probably refuse.Don't ask the leader to handle any major or minor matters regardless of the situation; otherwise, not only will the leader think that you are too incompetent, but you will also be unable to speak to the leader when you really need to talk to the leader.

[-]. Confuse concepts and disturb thinking - Confuse hypnosis to set out the truth of the other party

The basic principle of confusion hypnosis is to make the other party feel tired and confused on the conscious level, but let the subconscious level understand what happened.Through repeated hints, part is to be input to the conscious level, and part is to be input to the subconscious level, until it is easy to relax.

The strategy of pretending to be stupid will cause the opponent to misjudge.

In the animal world, "mimicry" and "protective color" are very important magic weapons for survival.In human society, pretending to be stupid is a kind of "mimicry" and "protective color".Sometimes, playing dumb can make your opponent overwhelmed or let down his guard, giving you an opportunity to hypnotize him, which is also a wonderful use of confusion hypnosis.

There are generally two ways to pretend to be stupid and dumb, one is to pretend to be deaf and dumb; the other is to answer irrelevant questions.Both of these methods are a manifestation of great wisdom and foolishness.

In June 1953, the 6-year-old British Prime Minister Winston Churchill went to Bermuda to attend the talks among Britain, France and the United States.He used his advanced age as an excuse, often pretended to be deaf, pretended not to hear questions that needed to be avoided, and refused to answer, and bargained with US President Eisenhower and French Foreign Minister Pidour on issues of interest. It gave the attendees quite a headache.Eisenhower said humorously: "Pretending to be deaf has become a new defensive weapon of this prime minister."

However, sometimes it is more effective to adopt an approach of answering irrelevant questions and talking non-speculatively than just being silent.Check out how this elderly couple can't get their words right below.

As soon as the salesman entered, he was greeted by an old man with white hair.The young salesman bowed respectfully. "Oh, oh, you are back! After all, you are back." The old man blurted out, "The old lady is coming out soon. The son is back, it is Yoichi who is back. He is very healthy, grown up, and looks talented!" The old lady rolled and crawled. Out.He just yelled "Yoichi!", covered his mouth, blinked his eyes, and couldn't speak anymore.The salesman panicked, and when he was about to say "I...", the old man shook his head and said, "I'll talk about it when I have something to say. Come on up, it's hard for you to remember this home. You were only in the sixth grade when you disappeared. I think you must I will come back, so I don’t even repair the old door, don’t change it to the original, I’ve been waiting for you.” The salesman couldn’t stay any longer, so he ran out from the house, and the voice calling him to stay remained on the doorstep. his ears.

"Probably the only son was lost. In addition to grief, the old couple are both insane, right? Poor." He returned to the company after thinking about it, and talked about it with his seniors.The old man said: "I wish I had told you earlier. There are only old couples in their family and no children. Because they are bored, they often play tricks on salesmen like this."

"Fucked! Well, I'll go again tomorrow, pretending to be my son, to push the boat along the way, and hurt their brains."

"Forget it, forget it, this time it should be said that the daughter came back and took out women's clothes for you to wear. In the end, you still have to run away."

"Pretending to be stupid" looks stupid, but is actually smart.Only when people stand in the world and do not boast about their merits can they protect themselves well and achieve great things.Learn to play dumb, not only can you pretend to be incompetent, smart and stupid, but you can also act nonchalantly, pretend to be noncommittal, not express your attitude, and then wait for the opportunity to speak out your own excellence, and catch the other party by surprise .

The so-called "hidden ingenuity and keep the clumsy, and use obscurity as clarity", no matter whether they are cunning, cunning or honest and honest, people almost all like stupid people who don't know how to play tricks.Therefore, to achieve your goals, you must learn to play dumb, know how to hide tricks, and not be seen through by others, that is, "smart and stupid".

Use homophonic puns to cover up mistakes.

Homophony refers to the use of the same or similar relationship between the sounds of a language, and the conscious use of dual meanings in a sentence, where the words are here and the meaning is there.The magical effect of homophony is that it can make people speak fluently and get out of trouble, and even save themselves from danger.Because many words in a specific situation, use the original sound for one meaning, and use the homonym for another meaning.

(End of this chapter)