money and life

Chapter 12 Don't live a life of debt (3)
At the beginning of their marriage, the husband and wife could not quickly adapt to family life. They didn't know what role they should play in this new family and what they should do.The two simply lived quietly for a while, and then slowly explored.There is a woman who has a happy family and a happy life. When we asked her the secret, she said that the first year is usually difficult and bumpy, because everyone doesn’t understand anything, and it’s hard to find yourself after stumbling position in the family.She learned a lot that first year and still has a lot to learn.As long as we work together and help each other, we will be able to overcome difficulties and live happily together.

But the young couple just now, the young man and the beautiful lady, they obviously didn't consider all the difficulties in life after marriage, and they got married entirely on impulse.It may be that the excitement of being in love made them lose themselves for a while, and it was only after they got married that they realized that the reality was not as beautiful as they imagined. The passion in love gradually faded after marriage, and the peaceful days made them feel disappointed. They were obviously not fully prepared for the small fights that came.Gradually, conflicts appeared between the two, and the beautiful lady had to shed her face with tears, but men don't like to see women cry about some trivial things.What a woman's tears exchange for is not a man's affection, but boredom.Don't shed tears until the critical moment.If this woman can be mature and rational, there will be no conflicts between them.Unreasonable troubles will only destroy the peace and happiness of life. It cannot be used as a tool to solve problems. If this happens for a long time, it will only make both parties more irritable, and it will be very difficult to enjoy life happily.

If the family members are intelligent and resourceful, their lives will be rich and colorful.However, no amount of wisdom can compare to a warm and kind heart. It makes us full of love, kindness and integrity.It is necessary for a happy life and good character, and it will make our life happy and beautiful without showing a trace of artificiality.Without it, life would be a back road full of thorns.Without a tolerant heart, the two parties will quarrel and abuse endlessly, and even if there are well-meaning people around, they dare not step forward to dissuade them.The anger of a person spreads and affects everything around him, and it also affects society, when joy and happiness are replaced by pain and suffering.

Let’s talk about the pretty lady before. Her husband only took a fancy to her appearance at first. After getting married, he found that his wife was depressed and frowning all day long, not as beautiful and lovely as before.Gradually, in his eyes, his wife was no longer as beautiful as before, and he began to get bored. He would feel that getting married was a wrong decision.In order to get rid of his family, he lingered in pubs all day long, smoking and playing cards to numb himself.For all this, his wife could only stay at home and sigh, and became even more sad, forming a vicious circle, and their lives could not be saved.

Children's education is very important, but many parents know little about it.They blindly follow the bad habits of society and treat children like objects.When I was young, I held it in my hand for fear of falling, but when I grew up, I became a labor force who shared family responsibilities.Parents are busy all day long for their children, and they never stop to take a good rest. Life becomes boring, without warmth and happiness, and the family is shrouded in misery all day long. Love is gone.

There is an old saying: "When you have nothing, even love disappears." But having everything doesn't mean you can have love.Families with adequate food and clothing are already satisfied materially, but not necessarily spiritually.If everyone in this family is cold, not humorous or cute, and never shows concern and warmth to others, they cannot have love.Satisfaction in life does not mean spiritual prosperity, true happiness needs to come from the heart.

Today's young people generally have no sense of responsibility. They only care about enjoyment beforehand, without considering what kind of development will happen afterwards.Therefore, they have completely different performances before and after marriage.They don't understand that some things are difficult to change once they are done, and wrong decisions will only lead to things going in the wrong direction.There is a saying that goes like this: "The quality of a marriage is as uncertain as the result of a lottery." We should treat this matter with caution and spend more time thinking and deliberating.When choosing a partner, you must not be hasty like choosing a slave. You can't just look at the other person's money and appearance. Education and morality are the most important.If you focus solely on appearance, your marriage may have a good outcome, but more than likely it will be bad, and the severity of this bad outcome is more than you can imagine.

However, it is not entirely correct to say that marriage is like asking for a lottery.As long as girls throw away the unrealistic content in movies and novels, learn how to choose a good boyfriend, and understand the taboos in love; and boys consider their character more than their appearance when choosing a wife , the result of the marriage facilitated in this way has been expected, and its result can only be good, and it cannot be bad. In this way, we don't have to worry about marriage being as uncertain as the result of asking for a lottery.As long as both men and women think more and think further, their lives will be happy.It is impossible for a person not to make mistakes in his life, but the mistakes are big or small. We should not bet on the happiness of the rest of our lives.

being in debt brings shame

As the saying goes: "We can't let an empty bag stand up." Similarly, people with heavy debts can only bow their bodies like shrimp, and they can't even have basic integrity.Everyone knows that a debtor has few words of truth, and the two are closely linked.A debtor often fabricates lies, hoping that the person who lent him money will relax a little bit, and takes great pains to give various reasons.In fact, as long as you grit your teeth and save a little, you don’t need to be in debt. As long as you take the first step, you can’t control your behavior. The second step and the third step will follow one after another, and you will slowly accumulate a lot of bills.In the same way, the first time you tell a lie, you will always be unable to open your mouth, but after you break through, you will lie one after another.

Haydn was a painter who became out of control after his first debt.Remorseful, he understood the truth that "people in debt will never enjoy a comfortable life".He described his predicament in his diary: "After being in debt, I have carried an invisible burden. The burden on me has not been removed now, and maybe I will not be able to take it off until I die." The embarrassing life and his own spiritual changes are written in his autobiography. The changes in life made him unable to concentrate on work, and at the same time he had to face the contempt of others, and he felt very sad and embarrassed.Before serving in the navy, he wrote a lot of advice to his friends: Never let yourself be in debt for a moment of pleasure.People look down on people who are in debt.If someone asks you to borrow money, and your situation allows it, you can still lend it to him, but don't put yourself in debt just to collect money for others.Remember, no matter what happens, you must rely on your own ability to solve it, not money.

It is very bad for people to be in debt when they are young. Dr. Johnson said: "Don't think that borrowing money is just making it difficult for others. The biggest harm is directly affecting you. Borrowing money blindly will make you lose your energy If you want to rely on others to live, it will make you weaker in the face of temptation. Look at those strong-willed people, who is full of debt? So we should resolutely resist the behavior of being in debt. Use One's own efforts to avoid poverty and make life rich and happy. You must know that poverty will squeeze some good morals out of the soul and make people lose their freedom. Saving can bring us a quiet and pleasant living environment, While ensuring your own happy life, you can also help others. If you don’t change your mind, you will never get sincere help from others.”

We should solve our own affairs by ourselves. We need to develop a good habit of keeping accounts and learn some basic calculation methods, which can help us better manage our income and expenditure.Our life should be consistent with our ability and savings, and not exceed the maximum value of ability and savings, which requires us to make a detailed plan.John?Locke hopes that people can write down their daily expenses and income, and know their financial situation clearly, so that there will be no overspending.The Duke of Wellington has a statement specially used to plan money. He told Mr. Glaci: "Don't let the servant pay your bills for you. I used to do this before. One morning I decided to change the method and pay the bills myself. , so I can know my financial situation. I think it will be good for everyone.”

The Duke of Wellington went on to say: "Why did I change my mind? On that day, I received all the bills I owed during those two years. It turned out that my servant had invested all the money that should have paid the bills for me. I Only then did I realize that I owed so much debt.” Speaking of this, the Duke of Wellington sighed again: “I know what it feels like to have no money, but I never borrow money from others, and I know that once I borrow money, I will have no freedom. "Washington, who has the same idea as the Duke of Wellington, often checks on family expenses. He is very careful with money, and he has not changed even after becoming president.

Holy?Earl Visht was also the commander of the fleet. When recalling the past, he specifically explained that no matter how difficult the situation was, he would not borrow money. "When I was young, my family was very poor, and everyone's life was maintained by my father, but my father gave me 20 pounds for the first time when I entered the society. Later, because I was struggling when I joined the army, I wrote a letter to ask my father for help. Funding, the money came, but there was a sense of blame in my father's letter. I felt very embarrassed and vowed not to borrow money no matter how difficult it was. I have never broken this vow. After being scolded by my father, I began to reflect My own life depends on working hard to make money. I saved all the subsidies given to us by the army. I washed and sewed the clothes and sheets by myself. I also learned to sew pants and made them with a piece of linen sheet. I have a lot of savings Afterwards, I paid off my father's money in full, which made me feel that my self-esteem came back to me. I have developed the habit of thrift and always remind myself not to exceed the budget." Saint?After 6 years of frugal living, Earl Visht has become a rigorous and upright person. His hard work was not in vain, and he finally became a commander based on his outstanding performance.

learn to control desire
The courage of self-control can be manifested in many ways.However, this kind of courage can only be manifested most truly and clearly in real life.Selfish desires control those who cannot control themselves.Those who are as selfish as they are will also treat them as slaves.These people live in falsehood, copy what others say, and never think about the consequences of things.For material comfort, they will desperately seek it.They can't control their desires, they are easily conquered by their desires, and the interests of others will be damaged by them.They slowly began to owe money and did not pay back, and eventually became slaves to debts.They are morally cowardly and mean.They have no independent character.

Honest people don't hide their faults, and they don't pretend to be themselves. What they are looking for is only the real way of life.He doesn't live off other people's handouts, they don't spend beyond their means, they spend only what they can afford.They considered living in debt as shameful as street burglars.

Some people may think that this is too serious, but this is the way to pass the most severe test.It is dishonest to live by others, it is hypocritical, it is wrapped in lies.George?Herbert has a famous saying, "Being in debt is the same as lying." This statement has been verified by many facts.Horsmog?There is a pastor named Shaftesberg in Lalan Prison. In his annual report submitted to the Sulei court, he expounded his views: "For the crime of robbery, I have carefully studied the character of the prisoners who committed this crime, and concluded that concluded. They go to robbery, not from ignorance, drunkenness, poverty, and the lure of a rich life, but from the desire to get something for nothing that comes from dishonesty." He believed that all immoral behavior is caused by the desire for dissatisfaction.I can't believe it.All noble character needs to be built on the basis of strict observance of all morals.

Those poor who live on borrowed money are never honest people who live frugally.For those who control their desires well, even if they do not earn much money, they will not fall into poverty.Regarding the wealth, jewels and valuable furniture that were transported to Athens, Socrates said: "I will not expect these things I see." Perseus said: "For selfishness, this is also Not an unforgivable thing. In the poorest life there are some of the great fortunes you and I have. Those necessities are the things that the poorest worry about. People need only learn to be frugal if they want to organize their daily life .”

People who are not troubled by dreams of getting rich are people who have no extravagant desires.Faraday is such a person. He gave up a large fortune and dedicated his life to the cause of science.He will not borrow money that cannot be repaid for the pleasure of living.Ma Jin, who owed a lot of debts, was asked: "What do you use to pay for the wine?" He said: "I don't know, I only know that there is another sum of money owed on my bill."

The depravity of the weak-willed is shown in the act of keeping accounts.They succumb to temptation, and to do so, always borrow money.However, borrowing is an encouraged behavior in business competition, and those borrowers hope to obtain the maximum benefit.Once, Heaney?Smith goes to visit a new neighbor.The local papers described the new neighbor as a man of great trade, with every industry affected by him.But Mr. Smith's visit brought sobriety to the neighbor.He said: "We are just like ordinary people. There is nothing extraordinary, and we also abide by the principle of borrowing and repaying."

Hazley, while not thrifty, was honest and upright.He said of those who borrowed money and failed to accumulate wealth: "People who waste money spend it on the first thing they see. They are never enough. Those who borrow money always find money. People borrow money and are finally led into the abyss of degeneration by this ability."

We can find real examples, and Sheridan's story speaks for itself.He was a spendthrift and borrowed money whenever he ran out, and he borrowed money from everyone who trusted him.He was thus discredited by these debts when he ran for Congress.Lord Palmerston said: "His podium was surrounded by innocents who demanded what he owed." But Sheridan still laughed at his creditors in this embarrassing hour.All this was seen by Lord Palmerston.His creditors would not be fooled by Sheridan's decency, they would doubt his virtue.

People in that era were not very moral about money matters.Those who embezzle public funds will not receive much censure, and the leaders of some political parties often protect the followers of those who embezzle public funds.They show a generous tolerance, thinking that these people are fine as long as they don't harm their interests.They considered themselves dignitaries, and their tolerance allowed the insolence of those who embezzled money to be condoned.

Colonel Pinal was Auditor of the Army Accounts when Conley Worth was Governor of Ireland.Conleyworth said: "I only learned one valuable thing from childhood, and that is, I need a person who is honest and upright."

Among those who do not embezzle public property, Lord Kachin can be said to be No.1.He did not take a penny from the public when he was in office.His integrity was passed on to his eldest son.In the face of huge sums of millions, Pete was not tempted at all.He lived a life of justice and integrity, and at the end of his life he was alone.His honesty and integrity will not be doubted by those who have viciously attacked him.

Government officials used to have high salaries.In the [-]th century, there was a famous official buyer, his name was Audrey, he bought the post of judge, when someone asked him how much he paid for it, he replied: "There are many people who desire to enter heaven, but those who don't care about the next The latter are more numerous than those in Hell. It is a well-known fact that there is no one who is afraid of demons."

As a typical gentleman of honesty and integrity, Watt?Scott is undisputed.He wrote in his biography: "He tried his best to repay all the debts related to himself. His manuscript could not be published because he had no money. He had reached the point of bankruptcy. But in his most difficult time, he did not To beg for the mercy of others. His friends offered to lend money to help him pay off his debts, but he said proudly: "No need, I will pay it myself, and pay everything by writing hard with my right hand. ’ He wrote a letter to a friend, in which he said: ‘I have everything to lose but a clean name. "His body was affected by excessive work, but he still worked hard to write, writing like a tiger, and he finally succeeded in completing the task when he couldn't move the pen. He paid off all the debts, in exchange for life and health, to maintain Saved his own reputation, but also preserved his self-esteem.

(End of this chapter)