The rest of your life is long, you are the most unforgettable

Chapter 5 May there be no time to turn back

1
Some people say: Love is the best if you can't get it.

Those who have loved with sincerity and innocence are mostly in hysteria, growing resentment and drifting away; only those lovers who keep a distance and secretly yearn for it will always shine bright and flawless.The love of hand-to-hand combat will inevitably hurt each other in the end.

So, what is not available is the best?

But the love you can't get, no matter how gorgeous it is, is just a dream after all, never got it, never lost it, it is an illusion from the beginning of emotion, the person you admire is your own imagination, he satisfies all your fantasies about love, but He didn't know anything about it.

But for true love, what we want is the most common kissing, hugging, sleeping, the most ordinary nostalgia and dependence, the companionship within reach, the joy and sorrow also bring the body temperature and emotions of another person.Authentic.

2
Strictly speaking, Ye Zi did not fall in love with Haima at first sight.

After all, they are in the same class, and Haima is the class monitor, and Ye Zi supposedly has seen him [-] times.

But some people say that love comes suddenly, and only those who have never loved think that love is a gradual process of emotion.From this perspective, Ye Zi's love for seahorses burst out in an instant.

That day Ye Zi hurried past the basketball court with a stack of radio scripts in her arms, completely unaware that the ball was coming towards her, Haima rushed up and blocked it with her hands, the ball went elsewhere without hitting Ye Zi.

Ye Zi, who was still in shock, looked back at the seahorse beside him, with bright and clear eyes, sweating profusely, as if the whole body was bubbling, and the bubbling sound seemed to be the rhythm of the heartbeat.

Haima smiled at her: "I didn't scare you."

All love at first sight is related to the rapid heartbeat.Thinking back afterwards, Ye Zi didn't know whether her heart pounded because she was frightened, or because she was delighted by the tall and handsome hippocampus, and her face turned red.

You know, even if you are in the same class in college, if you don't have such a special experience, Ye Zi probably won't notice the hippocampus.

So is the hippocampus.

After that day, Ye Zi began to look forward to going to class every day. Her eyes could not help but search for the seahorse, and her ears caught the sound of the seahorse like a radar.What's more, she always approached him intentionally or unintentionally, asking him to help repair the computer and bicycle, and Haima was also willing to help.

Some people may be born more enthusiastic than others, better at communicating with others, like the link connecting the world.Seahorses belong to this category.

After going back and forth, the two became acquainted.When organizing class activities, Haima, the class monitor, often asks Ye Zi for help. The well-informed Haima introduces part-time jobs to Ye Zi, and Ye Zi, who gets paid for the part-time job, does not forget to treat Haima to a meal... In short, the two get closer and closer. As it gets closer, Ye Zi is secretly happy, she thinks everything is a prelude to love.

She likes him, in her eyes he is good everywhere, and he is perfect in everything he does.He lives in her heart, in her dreams, in her eyebrows, in her smile, and in her thoughts every time she wakes up before going to sleep.

3
But Haima did not take further action for a long time.

Ye Zi is a little confused, according to Haima's personality, if he likes someone, he will never be shy and dare not confess; why is that?They have come and gone, they have gone so close, could it be that I have misunderstood it?
She analyzed many reasons, and wondered if she was not feminine enough. She stayed with him all day and was regarded as a buddy by him... Women who fall in love are conspirator and fantasist, but love is blind The problem is that Ye Zi thought of countless reasons, but she never thought of the reason "Haima already has a girlfriend".

Love is exclusive, she likes him, so in her subconscious, he cannot and will never be allowed to be owned by other women.

But the truth is, Haima and his girlfriend have known each other since high school, and they have a very good relationship.

Ye Zi was extremely depressed after learning the truth.

It turned out that everything was really just my own misunderstanding.What a beautiful misunderstanding, Ye Zi almost thought that she had met someone she liked and also liked her.

Ye Zi listened to the CD, covered herself in the quilt, and lay there all afternoon.She thought she would cry hysterically like a supporting actress in a romance novel, but after thinking about it, she was actually not even a supporting actress.

She didn't think about it for an afternoon, Ye Zi thought about it for another two afternoons, and of course in the end, she decided not to think about it.It doesn't matter that he has a girlfriend, she still likes him, and there is no way to convince herself to let go.

Ye Zi smiled wryly and said: "I didn't confess, I didn't make a spare tire, so I just fell in love with myself silently, isn't it okay? Love can really be a matter of one person. If you love it, you will love it. At worst, you will love it until you graduate. See you Without people, there is no hope.”

When Haima was playing basketball, Ye Zi sat far away in the corner of the stand, reading a book casually, but she could quickly find Haima in the crowd when she raised her eyes; She still can't help but look in the direction of the hippocampus, and listen to him chatting with her ears up. Occasionally, when he comes to borrow an eraser or pen from her, she can still feel the ripples in her heart...

People are really interesting. After knowing that Haima has a girlfriend, Haima asked Ye Zi for help. She didn't misunderstand it at all. It was really just a help between ordinary friends.But in fact, what he asked her for help was those things before, the disputes in the student union, the selection of the class... But why was it misunderstood as love before?
In the end, it was just because she liked him and hoped that he would like herself.Therefore, in the eyes of a lover, the other party is also sentient, even if it is ruthless, it is interpreted as sentient.

All the feelings are buried deep in his heart, and Ye Zi finally turns himself into a buddy of Haima, and their relationship is getting better and better, so far away from love.Haima will talk to her about everything, even emotional depression, and Ye Zi will do her best to be a good listener and comforter.

She remembers his birthday, and waits for midnight every year to be the first to give him birthday wishes; after he plays basketball, she always passes him a bottle of mineral water tacitly; Make a copy of his; Haima's girlfriend came to school, and Ye Zi squeezed into the same bed with her, chatting very speculatively, and the two became best friends...

The original words of Haima's girlfriend are: "Even if Haima breaks up with me, whoever is with him, he will not be with Ye Zi, because they are like long-lost brothers and sisters." Such trust is nothing but because of Haima Really have no interest in the leaves.

The relationship between a man and a woman is always too fragile and can be lost easily, so if you want to cherish a person, you must not love him.

4
Ye Zi thinks that it is good to live in peace like this.The term is four years.

She likes him, is sincere, pure, hopeless, and is the biggest secret in the world.However, it was known by another person.

Xu Nuo often plays with Haima, he has noticed Ye Zi, Haima plays, she is there most of the time.

Xu Nuo lives next door to Haima. He is not a major with Haima. He is an engineering man with a delicate heart.

He once teased Ye Zi jokingly: "Hey, Ye Zi, do you like seahorses?"

Seeing Ye Zi's flushed face, Haima hurriedly made a rescue: "What are you talking about, I have a girlfriend, okay, and Ye Zi is really just my sister..."

"Who likes him? I have a boyfriend, okay? We really just hit it off, so we don't allow true friendship between men and women?" Before Haima could finish explaining, Ye Zi lied to smooth things over for herself.

Ye Zi suddenly realized that she must have a "boyfriend". Only when they have their own way, the relationship is normal in the eyes of outsiders, otherwise it will always be embarrassing.

"When did you have a boyfriend, why didn't I know?" This time it was Haima's turn to wonder.

"It's not long. We met on the Internet. It's a long-distance relationship. He said he came to visit me during the summer vacation." Ye Zi's eyes flickered, and he continued to make up lies in a hurry.

Now it was Xu Nuo's turn to be a little embarrassed.

Haima and Xu Nuo can always play together, so unknowingly, the relationship between Xu Nuo and Ye Zi also improves.

Xu Nuo learned of Ye Zi's secret after being drunk.

That day they won the basketball game with the school next door, and when they were happy, they called Ye Zi together and ate and drank in the small restaurant opposite the school.

The two boys ordered a lot of wine, Ye Zi saw that they were happy, so he followed them to have fun.The three of them chatted for a long time, Ye Zi was drunk, her face was flushed, and she lay on the table in a daze.The summer night breeze blew past, the roses at the entrance of the nearby community were in full bloom, and the stars in the sky were blinking.At this moment, Lao Lang's "You at the Same Table" floated out of nowhere——

you were always careful

Ask me to borrow half an eraser

You also accidentally mentioned
like to be with me

At that time the sky was always blue
days always pass too slowly

You always say graduation is nowhere in sight
In a blink of an eye

who met the sentimental you

who comforts you who cry

Who read the letter I wrote to you

Who threw it to the wind...

Ye Zi smirked, wishing he could just sit like this until the end of time.Ye Zi was lying on the table as if she was asleep, but she didn't seem to be asleep, and the voices of Xu Nuo and Haima were in her ears, vaguely.

After an unknown amount of time, Haima went to pay the bill.

Xu Nuo drank the last sip of beer in the glass, glanced at Ye Zi whose face was still red, and sighed for some reason.Suddenly, as if remembering something, he pushed Ye Zi: "Hey, didn't your boyfriend say he would come to Shanghai to visit you during the summer vacation? When will he arrive? Come back and show me and Haima, we will check it out for you."

Leaf didn't answer.

Xu Nuo pushed Ye Zi again: "Wake up, you won't really fall asleep, right? We won't be able to send you to the girls' dormitory building in a while."

Ye Zi opened his blurred eyes, glanced at Xu Xu, and replied, "Oh."

"I asked you just now, when is your boyfriend coming?"

"What boyfriend? I don't have a boyfriend, that's a lie..." Ye Zi muttered, changed her position, and fell asleep on her stomach again.

Only promise to stand still.

5
After hesitating all night, Xu Nuo still sent Ye Zi a text message the next day: "I know a secret of yours, but I decided to keep it for you."

"What are you talking about, why are you so thoughtless?" Ye Zi replied to him.

"If you don't want others to know, I can pretend not to know."

"What are you talking about, you haven't sobered up from yesterday's wine, right?" Ye Zi only thought that the promise was teasing her.

Everything is the same as before.

Ye Zi really liked Haima for four years.

Ye Zi returned to Beijing after graduation, and Haima stayed in Shanghai with his girlfriend.

After graduation, everyone seldom contacted each other, and the circle of friends became the only way to know each other's current situation.

Ye Zi fell in love, and her boyfriend was a foreigner, when she was sent to study abroad; Haima broke up, was very depressed for a while, and talked about a short-term love after recovering.

After going around and around, when they met again in Beijing, it was already the fifth year after graduation.

They sat in the quiet bar in Houhai, the singer hummed and sang a tune whose lyrics could not be heard, and Ye Zi looked sideways at the light outside the window.

The hippocampus has changed, a little beard has been added, and the shape of the face is more angular than before.

"You have changed a lot than before." Haima said.

"Really, I don't think so myself." Ye Zi stretched out her hands to brush the hair around her ears.

"My classmate is a beautiful woman, I didn't realize it before." Haima joked.

Ye Zi blushed, not knowing what to say.

"Yezi, I just found out that you once liked me. I'm sorry, I didn't find out for so long." Haima looked at Ye Zi and said.

Ye Zi knew what he was referring to.At the graduation ceremony, the two took a group photo. Ye Zi chose a beautiful photo frame and carefully put the photo in, along with a note: "Ye Zi likes seahorses."

"I met Xu Nuo not long ago, and I found out during the chat that you didn't fall in love in college, and you didn't have a boyfriend at all. You made it up." Haima continued.

Ye Zi smiled slightly.She remembered, promised that he knew a secret of hers, it turned out to be this, he knew it a long time ago, but kept it so well for her.

Unexpectedly, the secret was revealed five years later.

At that time, both of them were single.

6
If you can't get it, don't ask for it.Regarding the secret love time of a person in his youth, Ye Zi has actually forgotten a lot.After all, it has been too long.

It can be seen that Haima was moved, it turned out that he was once loved by someone silently, he said that he felt it vaguely, but he couldn't confirm it, and it has been so many years since he confirmed it. "Perhaps this is God's will, the arrangement in the dark, we meet again, I don't know if everything can start again?"

Ye Zi heard the meaning of Haima, but did not answer.

She doesn't know if the love of those years is still there now, or if it is gone, can it still be awakened?

Haima pursues Ye Zi, like all men pursue women, buying flowers, taking them to and from get off work, treating them to meals, watching movies, sending sweet messages on WeChat, and making phone calls.He wants to love this woman well, no matter because he was moved by love once, or because she is so beautiful now.

But Ye Zi quickly felt uncomfortable. Apart from recalling the past, she could find some familiarity in Haima when talking about interesting things in her student days. At other times, she was a little at a loss.The topic of the two chatting was not on the same channel at all.

He seems to be completely different from the person he once liked, or maybe times have changed, the environment has changed, the mood has changed, and all standards have changed.In those years of separation, the years have carved him, and also carved her.

After a date, walking on the evening wind blowing street, there is a fragrance of flowers floating in the air from nowhere, the atmosphere is very good under the dim street lights, Haima hugs Ye Zi's waist, bowing his head to kiss her.At the moment when breaths exchange breaths and lips touch lips, Ye Zi instinctively pushes the hippocampus away gently.

7
"I used to like you, but not now." Haima received Ye Zi's WeChat.

He didn't reply anything, and something missed was missed.

Under the light, Ye Zi looks at the photos in college, with a smile on the corner of her mouth.The person she had loved with all her heart was that young man who didn't know what she wanted.She couldn't get it at the time, and she loved it silently. She didn't think that she would get it after many years, so she pushed it away with her own hands.

Because she knew that what she liked was all fantasies about one person. She spent a lot of time and energy in her youth, but she just pinned all of this on a fruitless person.

How good, those memories are still there, she didn't get them before, but now it seems like she got everything.

But she knew that all these well-preserved things were just memories, not reality.It doesn't matter, she has never regretted it, and she has never regretted it. I hope that there will be no time to turn back, she is satisfied.

Therefore, in a relationship, it is not that what is not available is the best, but that as much as you get, you will find some bad things.But isn't life like this?When we love each other frankly, we will more or less discover the truth that was previously concealed.There is no such thing as perfect love. Those couples who love each other don't know how to love each other from the beginning, and they all learn how to love better after quarreling.

What we lose is fantasy and luck, and what we get is the real life at hand.

(End of this chapter)