Wang Junkai in whose landscape are you in?

Chapter 294 [Kay Me] Treat you the same (9)

[9]
At this moment, Wang Junkai seems to be enduring Ling Chi, unwilling to speak, waiting for my next change of heart, or, he has already guessed such an ending.

He has no tolerance for flaws, and neither do I.

The two of us who share the same thinking level are the easiest to guess each other's emotions, but I have to admit that I really don't really understand him very well, but he has been pampering me and protecting me.I really want to pretend that nothing happened, but there is always a knot in my heart, and I don't know how I became like this, greedy and narrow-minded.

Because I like it too much.

After a long time, Wang Junkai sighed.He sniffed and said to me with a pampering taste, "Now you don't want me. But I will still wait for you where I am, and I will wait for you to come back to me, and I will not move a step."

He started to choke up a little.

I couldn't hold back my emotions, so I deliberately took the phone away and turned on the loudspeaker.There was some noise from the earpiece, and his voice became deeper and deeper.The enlarged voice seemed to amplify his sadness, and in this small space, it became more and more intense, which moved Ah Jiu, but not me.

He said, "You are fine. I love you."

He said, "Xu Luo, I never thought that I would like you so much." He didn't say any more, only some faint sighs and cries remained.

Stop talking.

I'm not listening anymore.

Stop using your emotions and thoughts to interfere with my decisions.

From now on, Xiao Lang is just a passerby, and no one should make things difficult for the other party anymore.

I don't know when the phone was disconnected, the sound of "beep beep——" made the night more deserted, unwilling to move or think, expressionless, forgetting to cry or sad, eyes without emotion, at this moment I look like the living dead.

There is life but no thought.

I once said that Wang Junkai is my dream and my belief.But now I have lost my dream and my faith, just like a believer who cannot see Jerusalem no matter how hard he tries.

My Jerusalem is gone, where else can I go?

"Xu Luo. I really didn't expect that you would be so stubborn. For the first time, I feel a little disgusted with you." Ah Jiu's voice was not loud, and her voice was trembling because of crying. These words came from her mouth It does hurt a bit.

My best best friend actually told me that I hate myself. This hurt is as unpleasant as breaking up.This kind of loss is that when the three friends were walking, I squatted down because of tying my shoelaces, but when I got up, I could only see the two of them leaving hand in hand.Frankly speaking, it's the first time I've heard the word "hate" from Ah Jiu. No matter what happened to her, she was never like this before.

"I hate myself too." I said sullenly, and she lost her temper.

"Can you be happier, Ah Luo?"

"Why do you push away again and again, you ask your heart, do you still like it?"

"Are you willing, Ah Luo?"

"Can you give Wang Junkai a chance, and give yourself a chance?"

I ignored her.

I just looked into her eyes as if nothing had happened and announced a decision I thought I would never make until I died, but I heard it clearly.

I said, "I'm going home."

"Just this morning."

I'm sorry, I can't care about your feelings, please forgive my selfishness.

I didn't sleep all night.

She didn't sleep either.

All along, Ah Jiu's sleep has been extremely shallow, like a frightened cat.

Not long after, she tiptoed up and went to the refrigerator, picked up a lot of canned beer and threw it on the bed. While drinking, she murmured many things in my ear. The hot breath made me wake up completely, and I was still alive at this moment.She has been talking about every detail from the acquaintance to the present. At the end, she said with a joke, "When I didn't know you before, I really thought you were like a little princess, but only after I got to know you did I realize that you are so crazy."

I drank the wine without saying a word, and the taste of the wine kept spreading in my mouth, a bit bitter and a bit sour.

I don't like to drink, and I don't drink.

It's not because I'm afraid that drinking it will induce many diseases, I just think the taste is a bit disgusting, and the bitterness that turns over and over in my mouth is close to tears.

I even hate when other people drink.

But at this moment, I was pouring it heartlessly, drinking it like plain water.But even so, the sore and painful feeling in my heart still could not be suppressed.

When a person is sad, nothing can stop his emotions, unless that person suddenly appears and hugs him, or he suddenly stops breathing and dies like this.

I prefer the latter, because now I am so embarrassed that I don't know how to hide my emotions to face Wang Junkai.

Because once I face him, no matter how strong and self-righteous I am, I will reveal my fearful attitude.

I can't do well.

I can't hide it.

I ran away, probably because I was afraid that he would be smart enough to find out that I was leaving.I'm afraid of him being sad, and I'm even more afraid of seeing him sad with my own eyes.If you don't see it, you may still be able to live with peace of mind, but if you see it, it seems that the sadness has been cruelly magnified several times, and you will feel uncomfortable and have nowhere to hide.

I have always known that Wang Junkai does not like others to lie, and so do I.

I also know that there will always be a day when I leave, but I have been thinking about when it is appropriate to leave. I have spent countless sleepless nights looking out of the dark window thinking about this issue, but there is nothing can answer me.

I have always stayed in the child's nature, and I also know what is right and what is wrong, and what to do and what not to do on what occasion.

But I admit that I really have no sense of proportion in this matter. I just like it numbly, just like a jigsaw puzzle that fits the other. I have edges and corners, and he just has gentle flaws.

Complement each other, just right.

I drank until dawn and my thinking kept jumping, my eyelids were a little dizzy and dazed, but my thinking was still very clear.

Ah Jiu finally fell asleep after five o'clock, and I turned on the TV by myself and listened to the boring broadcast. The place with a twelve time difference from me must be sunset at this moment, and passers-by returning home are bathed in the afterglow, relaxing Open a whole body of fatigue, slowly adding laziness.

But at this time, the sky in my place was not yet bright, and when I opened the window, there was a thick fog, and when I squinted my eyes and looked at the window, there was an extra layer of frost.

I saw a figure standing under the street lamp on the side of the road. Against the light, no emotion could be seen.

In the still dark morning, the lone figure looked more and more lonely.

The pain went straight to my heart, but I couldn't cry.

Just when I was rubbing my eyes and trying to see the figure clearly, I saw him turn around, he should be facing me, his eyes were probably also looking at the hut.His eyes may be full of smiles like a crescent moon, or they may be full of sorrow like a deep sea. I can't see clearly, and I don't want to speculate.I carefully closed the curtains, fearing that if I took another look, I would be doomed.

Wang Junkai.

You better go.

For the first time, I felt cruel.Even if a small animal is injured, I will feel sorry for it for a long time. I can turn a blind eye to Wang Junkai's behavior of waiting outside the door for nearly a day and a night. It's a real skill.I curled my lips and laughed at myself secretly, shook my head, and walked towards the bed step by step, but the steps became heavier and heavier. This feeling is like thousands of rains hitting my body at this moment, and the cold wind blowing on my body Same.

In the darkness, I heard the slight sound of turning over, Ah Jiu was chanting something, and after climbing back to the bed, I felt my waist was imprisoned by a pair of strong hands, but the movements were light and gentle.But what she said made me fall into a deeper swamp and couldn't extricate myself, like a basin of cold water was poured on my newly warmed heart.

I couldn't see her face in the dark, and I didn't know whether she was dreaming or telling the truth, but I could hear her voice clearly, she said, "Ah Luo, I'm sorry."

My eyes were unconsciously covered with a thick layer of fog, and I didn't even know how sad my heart was.

Just treat it as a dream.

After I took her hand away and adjusted her quilt, I lay back under the quilt, but felt cold.Feeling in the dark, I found the remote control at the head of the bed, turned on the heater to the maximum, and then retreated into the bed comfortably. The body is comfortable, but the heart is not, and the heart full of holes has been pulled out of many wounds , became bloody after all.

Wang Junkai is also having a hard time.

Wang Junkai, if you are poison, I would still drink it with a smile on my face.

If I can forgive you in the future, please commit you to me and never doubt you.

It's just that I don't know which day I will be able to truly ignore the past, forgive you.

You love me like loving a tree that won't bloom, but both are willing to turn back.

After six o'clock, I got up again and continued to stand in place to spy on the enemy's situation. Wang Junkai still didn't leave. He stood under the street lamp and paced, looking very cold.

I pursed my lips and thought for a long time.

At 06:30, the sky began to light up, but it was still cloudy. The trees outside seemed to be covered with frost, bringing the bleakness of autumn.Wang Junkai stood in front of the bleak background, but it was still too beautiful.

He was the only ray of brilliance in that cold weather, which was hard to fade despite the wind and snow.

I woke up Ah Jiu who had just started dating Duke Zhou, and sighed and said to her, "Ah Jiu, please send Wang Junkai a piece of clothing."

After hearing this sentence, she changed from being dissatisfied and murmured to being courteous. She looked like a different person. She quickly got up and put on her coat, and nodded to me, "Okay."

Then she asked me why I changed my mind. I didn't answer her, but just stuffed her the clothes, and then pushed her to the door very cruelly, muttering, "Get out as soon as you go."

She raised the corner of her mouth and replied helplessly, "Okay. Just follow your orders."

Then I saw Ah Jiu's figure getting further and further away.

There are two shadows in the distance.

It was Ah Jiu who delivered the clothes to Wang Junkai, and it was delayed for a long time. I wondered if they were having an unknown conversation. I stood silently watching, and turned around and entered the door after two seconds.

When seeing Wang Junkai shivering from the cold.

I admit that I have softened my heart, so soft that it is a mess.

Virgos believe that people pay attention to those trivial things.

A detail can move their hearts, or they will become disheartened from then on.As the old saying goes, success and failure are also details.

When Ah Jiu came back, I sat on the sofa in a daze, my hands were flushed from the cold.

The weather has not really started to turn cold, but my physical suffering has become more and more clear. People who are afraid of the cold are prone to many uncomfortable symptoms when their resistance is weakened.

"You really don't want to go out and meet him?"

"What did he say?"

"He didn't say."

Ah Jiu's eyes glanced at a trace of unknown emotion, even in a dim room, I still caught it clearly.

She is lying.

There are many people in this world whose eyes are like mirrors and can peer into their hearts, such as Ah Jiu.

But there are also some people, you can never tell whether it is a lie or the truth, such as Wang Junkai.

It's my fault. I'm seriously suspicious.

What is it like to like someone?It is you who will start to worry about gains and losses for him, protect him carefully, and regard him as a treasure.But for me, when I like someone, I will start to criticize myself more severely, feel that I am not good enough, and want to express my emotions, but I can't say anything.So I like to write things, write down the emotions I dare not express in the notebook, and when I read it one day after a long time, I think about my cowardly self at that time, and cry out for her.

Nostalgia, the past is not warm, but it is not because I am worried that I will not meet better ones in the future.

If you can meet someone better in the future, who will think of yourself, Wang Junkai, you are no exception.

"What's the use of meeting?" I asked Ah Jiu back. Her clear pupils were full of anxiety at the moment, and she seemed to be hiding something. Because I was at a loss.

Seeing this, she didn't know why she felt even more panicked in her heart.

Damn, Ah Jiu, didn't we agree to be friends for life?How did we become like this?Treating you heart and soul, then what did you do without telling me?Or maybe something happened to make you look trembling in front of me?

I lowered my eyes and said in a strange tone, "Okay, I'll go."

Whether it's obedience or pity or miss, frankly, I don't know what kind of feeling is bothering my emotions.

Later, I thought, if I didn’t go out that day, I wouldn’t feel disappointed if I didn’t go out, and if I didn’t feel disappointed, I wouldn’t leave by myself so rashly, without leaving a message, so that he can’t find it.

One wrong step, and every next step is retribution.I have nothing to say.

[Phase [-]/Original Work: Min Luo/To be continued]
　Today topic:
　　#Graduation season what you want to say most#
　　Answer: I am about to graduate, and I feel that the past three years are like a dream, and this dream is about to wake up.When I gave a speech last week, I was quite stage fright because of my first speech.But everyone in my squad was cheering for me, and before I went on stage, they kept shouting "Ma Jiaqi is waiting for you".Very touching.Of course I got No.2 hahahaha, No.1 is also in our class.great.

　　
　
(End of this chapter)