Funny: The Hilarious Life of a Wasted Taoist 2

Chapter 17 Bronze Mirror (4)
"How can this be a good thing? Three women in one drama, not to mention five wives and one mother now. The man himself is not like a person with his own opinions and determinism. Modern women are very strong. When the time comes, the big and small wives will be jealous. Coupled with the relationship between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law, the male ghost must be very busy, so he has no time to come out and scare people."

"Oh, this trick is too insidious." As a man, Guan Xing, a man, understands how vicious my trick is, and his eyes show sympathy for the little devil, "What if he becomes angry and makes trouble again?"

"It doesn't look like he has such a backbone." I said, "But just in case, I asked Gou Fugui to contact the ghost agent in the dating agency. The two ghost agents used some tricks and threatened him. , I guess that ghost doesn't have the guts to make trouble anymore."

Yun Mei let out a cry, and said, "You treat ghost messengers as emissaries of the underworld?"

"You can't say that, haven't you heard a common saying?" I said, "No one can stop ghosts from playing hooligans."

"What Xiao Ma said is reasonable." Sanniang nodded appreciatively, "Reasonable use of the interpersonal relationships around you can achieve good results."

As expected of a vixen, it resonates with me uniquely in this kind of place.

The little ghost screamed. Since I came out of the mirror last time, I have memorized the Morse code. Pixiu, who can quickly translate the little ghost's words, has never made a sound. At this moment, I can only rely on guessing, watching the little ghost's expression and movements. It should be expressing dissatisfaction.

This kid has a strong sense of justice.

I patted the kid on the shoulder and said, "You don't understand the world of adults."

"It worked, that's really great." Yunmei covered her mouth and smiled gratifiedly. Seeing the man's feminine movements made me feel numb. Basically, when the residents on the second floor see Yunmei Just look away.Hearing Yunmei's delicate voice, her expression began to twist.

After switching bodies, I discovered one thing, that is, ghosts would vomit when they were disgusted. These days they saw me fine, but they reacted violently when they saw Yunmei.

Their behavior made Yunmei very frustrated. I once comforted her not to be sad because her personality is not as good as mine, but every time I said this, she always looked at me with ignorant eyes. I heard her talking to herself saying that it would be better to switch with Reddy Gaga.

Yun Mei asked: "But since the matter is settled, why haven't we changed back to the original state?"

These words poured cold water on me who was still immersed in the excitement of success, yes!Now that it's done, why haven't we changed back!
Sanniang asked: "Speaking of which, who did you hear that you can get back after finishing this matter?"

Of course it was Li Botong!

Without telling Sanniang, Yunmei and I went back to the vegetable market to look for Li Botong, and there was a beef seller at the fortune-telling stall.

Li Botong was talking to the guy who was buying beef: "This is a land of good geomantic omen. You see, this stall faces south, and there is no shelter above the stall. There is plenty of sunshine and wind and rain. Although the place is small, there are stalls on the front, back, left, and right sides. Wealth is easy." Gathering is not easy to disperse, it can be called a place of treasures. As the saying goes, Wuji produces Taiji, Taiji produces Eryi, Eryi produces four phases, and four phases produce eight trigrams. According to the hexagrams, this is the threshold in the eight trigrams. Your five elements are short of water , and Kan belongs to the water phase, which happens to make up for your congenital deficiency of horoscope. Have you seen that apple seller?"

The beef buyer was already dizzy, looked at the apple stand not far away, and nodded.

Li Botong continued: "The apples are ruddy and smooth, with a delicate fragrance and unobtrusiveness. They have the meaning of wealth, auspiciousness and auspiciousness. The apples are spread in the east of you, and the purple air comes from the east. It can greatly improve your fortune. It is beneficial and harmless. If you are in other places, There are too many blood debts from slaughtering cattle and sheep, which will inevitably affect fate, but here there are chicken stalls on the left and fish stalls on the right. If the murderous aura gathers, it can block gods and ghosts, and use evil spirits to drive away evil spirits. How do you feel about this stall now? OK?"

The beef seller showed a sense of dementia bewitched by a cult: "Good!"

Li Botong flicked the Buddha dust: "Such a good booth now only costs 98 yuan, not one thousand, not two thousand, but nine hundred and ninety-eight! Nine nine eight! Nine nine eight! Numbers over nine turn into zero, and ninety-nine returns to one." , Nine-five is supreme, nine is the biggest! Eight means prosperity, attracting wealth and wealth means prosperity, and sufficient customers will lead to prosperity. What do you businessmen focus on most? Marrying a wife? No, how can you start a family without success in your career! Pleasure? No, how can you travel around without capital! What, have you thought about it?” After a series of questions, Li Botong asked the beef seller, who was about to speak, Li Botong immediately stopped him, and asked himself He replied: "That's right, making money! It's about making money! A man should put his career first. Whether his career is successful or not is reflected in his assets. In layman's terms, it's about making money! If you want to make money, what are you going to do?"

Selling Beef's eyes straightened, and he shook his head in confusion.

Li Botong sighed, and said: "Of course I set up a stall here! This place complements your destiny, and it is the best way to make money. Such a precious place, and such a good price, do you want it?"

The beef seller suddenly realized, his cheeks flushed with excitement, and he nodded repeatedly.

"It's natural for you to want it." Li Botong shook his head, showing embarrassment, "A mutton seller also fell in love with this stall before, and offered a price of 99, but I didn't give it up to him. I have a very important meaning, which was left to me by my grandfather." Li Botong looked into the sky with tears in his eyes, "My grandfather told me before he died that he must guard this fortune-telling booth."

Nonsense you, this market was only built in March last year.

"Can't sell it?" The beef seller was shocked when he heard this, his face was ashen.The whole person trembled like a dog's tail in the cold wind, and left in frustration.

"Don't go!" Li Botong grabbed him, "I haven't finished my sentence yet, the poor are easy to soften, so if you beg me..."

The beef seller wiped his tears and asked, "Huh?"

Li Botong repeated: "If you beg me, I might let go."

"Daoist!" Selling Beef finally understood, threw himself on the ground, grabbed Li Botong's Taoist robe with both hands and said repeatedly, "I'll offer one thousand! Please sell this to me."

"Seeing that you begged me sincerely..." Li Botong nodded, with a look of resignation, "That's all, helping others is the foundation of happiness, I'll let you. Remember to pay the booth fee every month."

Selling beef gratefully took money out of his pocket.The fish seller next to him whispered to the chicken seller: "How much did he rent this stall back then?"

The chicken seller said, "Fifty."

The fish seller and I sighed in unison: "This old boy is really dark!"

After Li Botong received the money, he took out another talisman from his pocket: "This is a lucky talisman, and I set up a stall here with the lucky talisman. As long as you do business honestly, you will be safe and wealthy."

The beef seller was so moved that he was about to cry: "Master Taoist, you are such a good person, what's your name?"

"How can you keep your name for doing good deeds?" Li Botong said, "Taoist priests don't change their names and surnames. Remember, my name is Zhang Chongyang."

I almost choked on my saliva.This guy is bad enough, if you do something bad, don't report your name and report my master's name!
"Zhang Chongyang, Zhang is the length of the bow, and the weight is the weight of repetition..."

I covered Li Botong's mouth and dragged him out. You didn't frame him enough and you still explained it in such detail!Can you be any more wicked?
The beef seller was taken aback. I couldn't say clearly that my uncle was a liar, so I could only wink at him, trying to make him understand that he had been duped.

The beef seller shouted: "Demon girl, don't try to confuse me by winking, what do you want to do to the Taoist priest?"

I hate iron but not steel!What do I want to do?I would like to ask you to go to the hospital as soon as possible to have a look at your brain.

The beef seller wanted to say something, but Li Botong waved his hand to stop him, then struggled to get rid of my hand covering his mouth, and smiled lightly at the beef seller: "Don't worry, Pindao is born like this!" Humans will inevitably be infatuated by mortals."

The beef seller showed the original expression, looked me up and down and said: "So I am a fan of the Taoist chief. Young people like to follow stars. I understand that, but why is this pretty girl so fanatical? Is your sister Isn't it called Yang Lijuan?"

Yun Mei who said this was angry, stomped her feet and scolded: "You are the only star chaser, your whole family is star chaser!"

Li Botong was probably afraid of what I would say, so taking advantage of the fact that a group of people were disgusted by the actions of Yun Mei, who had a male body and a female soul, he said that everyone would meet later and dragged me away.

Criminals can have a chance to reform themselves, so I kept silent, and when I got out of the market, I said to Li Botong: "Uncle Master, you are playing big games. Fraud is a crime. Do you think you surrender yourself or me?" Seeing righteousness and killing relatives for righteousness sent you to the police station."

Li Botong said: "Who are you as an apprentice, why did you suddenly go to that pork seller's side?"

"Pork seller?" I looked back at the market, "Isn't he a beef seller?"

"What kind of beef?" Li Botong said, "His pork is boiled with beef essence to make fake beef. Pindao is teaching him a lesson."

I laughed: "I see. Deserved! Deserved!"

Li Botong stroked his beard proudly and asked me: "How is it? Uncle Master did a good job!"

I stuck out my thumb and said, "Well done, it's these bastards who made us eat in fear... Hey, that's not right... He doesn't know if you teach him a lesson. What if you continue to sell fake beef in the future? ?”

Yun Mei interjected: "And even if it's to teach him a lesson, you can't lie to him."

Li Botong turned his head and stared at Yunmei with a smile: "This is not like what you said."

Yun Mei's eyes suddenly became cold, and she asked with a smile, "What do you mean?"

I looked at Yunmei and then at Li Botong, but I couldn't understand what they were talking about.

"As the saying goes, if you spend money to eliminate disasters, since I have taken his money, I have to help him." Li Botong continued, "So I told him to do business honestly. If he is honest and honest, then the position and I can definitely help him, if he still stubbornly walks in crooked ways, that place will be his end. I advised him but didn’t point it out, I just want him to make his own choice... By the way, what are you doing here?”

I said, "We've settled the matter of the dating agency."

"Solved?" Li Botong looked at me in surprise, "So fast!"

"It's solved." I spread my hands, "Didn't you say you can change back, why didn't we change back?"

"That's strange." Li Botong stroked his beard, "According to the divination, it should indeed be there."

I looked at him suspiciously: "Uncle Shi, are you fooling us again?"

"No," Li Botong thought for a while, and asked me, "Did Pixiu say anything?"

I pointed to the jade pendant on Yunmei's neck and said, "That guy doesn't say anything recently."

"Oh!" Li Botong glanced at the pendant and exclaimed, "This is terrible!"

"what?"

Li Botong pointed at the jade pendant with his fly whisk: "How come you are still here leisurely! Why don't you speak, Pixiu is gone!"

"It's gone?" I said, "Isn't the jade pendant right there?"

"Sacred beasts can't descend to earth casually. The jade pendant is just a prop for the brave to attach to. In other words, the jade pendant is actually equivalent to a container. The brave is the water in the container. Now the container is there, but the things inside are gone." Li Bo ventilated He flicked his sleeves vigorously, "How could you lose Pixiu!"

I nodded, and my gaze shifted to the cuff of Li Botong's Taoist robe. There seemed to be something there that was about to fall off as he waved his hand.

By the time Li Botong caught my gaze, the thing had already dropped lightly.

is a piece of paper.

Li Botong's expression changed drastically, and he quickly reached out to grab it. Yun Mei caught the paper one step ahead of him, and read aloud according to the words on it: "Ghost Exorcism Contract."

Li Botong pretended to be nothing, turned his head and hummed a little tune to look at the sky.

I quickly stretched out my head to look, if I don't look, I'm done, and I don't feel angry when I look at it.

This is the exorcism contract between Li Botong and the wedding company.

This old boy actually signed a contract with someone!Then fool us to exorcise ghosts!
It turns out that there is a fee for exorcising ghosts this time!All the money went into the old boy's pocket.

I took the piece of paper to Uncle Li and said, "You actually made money from us!"

A smile immediately appeared on Li Botong's face: "I want you to have more experience in exorcising ghosts, and make progress quickly."

Well said, I asked sharply, "What about the money?"

"Don't talk about money. Talking about money hurts feelings. Let's talk about feelings."

I said angrily, "Talking about feelings hurts money!"

"In this case," Li Botong said, "then let me tell you something." After finishing speaking, he whispered in my ear.

I have not yet understood what he meant by what he said.Li Botong asked again: "Apprentice, have you ever seen the technique of escaping from the ground?"

I shook my head: "I haven't seen it."

Li Botong said: "Master Uncle will let you see it today." After he finished speaking, he muttered something, and stamped his right foot on the ground, and his whole body sank into the ground as if he had fallen into a quagmire.

I was dumbfounded.

Finally, Li Botong's lotus crown also disappeared into the land.I stepped on the ground a few times and it was solid.

No wonder this guy was able to escape from Sanniang so many times, it turned out that he was really capable.

I yelled to the ground: "Master, I understand, you come out first, let's divide the money for exorcising ghosts from the marriage agency, [-] cents, you one and I nine, and that share will be considered as my introduction fee for you. "

The ground was completely silent.

I said, "Then you two and I eight."

The ground remained still.

I said: "[-]! Can't be less."

The ground remained unresponsive.

Only then did I realize that I had escaped to the ground, and I guess I would never come back again!
Li Botong is gone!
This guy absconded in fear of crime!

There is no uncle in this world who deserves a beating more than this.

"Horsepower." Yunmei looked at me worriedly, "What should we do now, we haven't found a way to change back yet."

"Do it yourself and have enough food and clothing!" I said, "Let's not rely on him, and find a way to get back."

"What about Pixiu?" Yun Mei said, "Li Daochang said that he is missing."

I said: "The last time I saw him was in the mirror. It seems that the most important thing is the mirror! Let's go back and study the mirror by ourselves!"

Pixiu is there, I must get it back.

(End of this chapter)