Funny: The Hilarious Life of a Wasted Taoist 2

Chapter 5 Little Ghost (1)
As soon as I turned around, I saw the little ghost who hadn't been out of the room for ten thousand years, opened the door, and looked out through the crack of the door.

This brat lives in a secluded place, and in my impression he has never met Gou Fugui, so I asked strangely, "Have you seen him?"

"Familiar." Gou Fugui rubbed his belly, looked at me, then at the child, and suddenly realized: "Is he your dead son?"

I almost spat out a mouthful of blood and said, "You can't talk nonsense about this, and why are you talking so badly?"

Gou Fugui said: "You two look alike, you have a nose, two ears, two eyebrows, two eyes, and a mouth. Under the hair are eyebrows, under the eyebrows are eyes, the nose is under the middle of the eyes, and the mouth is under the nose."

Are you and Li Botong relatives?

"Comrade Lei Feng, I told you a long time ago that this ghost can't be raised casually. It's not easy to do a ghost census in the underworld. You should register for him as soon as possible," Gou Fugui said, "Seeing that we know each other so well, I can give it to you." Discount! How about this, I will give you a [-]% discount on the account opening fee."

Can this also be discounted?I said: "Come on, someone changed their life so many times before and you didn't find out, and the census is useless."

"Comrade Lei Feng, you are wrong to say that. You want to support our work." Gou Fugui looked at the kid again, stroked his chin and said, "Your face is familiar... your face is familiar..."

I suddenly had a flash of inspiration in my heart, did Gou Fugui know about this child?Immediately asked: "Where have you seen him?"

Gou Fugui looked at the little ghost carefully, and Wu Xiangwang next to him stretched his head to take a look, and asked, "Leader, didn't there be a ghost looking for someone a while ago? He showed us a portrait, it was this kid, but the portrait He wears ancient clothes and has a different hairstyle, so he doesn't look the same."

"Yes, yes." Gou Fugui nodded repeatedly and said, "That's him!"

"Looking for him." I asked, "What kind of ghost is looking for him."

"A tall ghost, skinny and skinny." Wu Xiangwang said, "Wearing a tattered gown, with protruding eyes, looks a bit nervous."

After hearing his words, the kid's expression changed drastically, and he shivered.

"We also followed that man for a while." Gou Fugui said, "He was playing with three dice in his hand, and we suspected that he gathered a crowd to gamble. Although the underworld turned a blind eye to gambling, we as Yang Ming The ghost messengers in the village must lead by example and strictly manage them! We will resolutely not allow this kind of thing to happen within our jurisdiction."

gamble!As soon as I heard this, I vaguely realized that the person they mentioned had something to do with the kid in the house. That ghost was the gambler who raised the kid back then!
I quickly asked, "Then where is he?"

"He entered the city, and the city is not within our jurisdiction." Wu Xiangwang said, "We didn't pursue him."

"It seems that the ghost came to look for him." Li Botong flicked his whisk, pointed at the little ghost and said, "Could it be your enemy?"

The kid was uncharacteristically calm, with a panicked expression, squatting on the ground, holding his head, opening his mouth and screaming "Ah... ah...", presumably he thought of the original thing.

Yun Mei ran down from upstairs, hugged the little ghost and said, "Don't be afraid, don't be afraid, with us here, no one can bully you."

The hanged ghost also said: "Yuan Youlun bullies you, I will whip him with my tongue!"

The gambler has not yet been reincarnated, and it seems that he has been looking for this brat.

"Is that person a bad guy?" Gou Fugui walked over, patted the kid on the head and said, "Don't be afraid, kid, our police uncle can protect you."

The little ghost's voice became smaller and smaller, apparently calmed down.

"Mister Horse." The man's head floated out and said to me: "Oude Mister Horse told me that the gambler also came here to look for it before, but the house where the kid stayed was cursed and he couldn't find it. .”

No wonder the brat has been reluctant to come out, it turned out he was hiding from the gambler.

I have escaped for hundreds of years, so it should be fine this time.

"Have you talked enough?" Pai Yao asked impatiently, "What should this ghost do?"

Then I remembered that Wu Xiang was still under Pixiu's paws, and now the ghost was crying: "I died so badly! My wife and son, I am sorry for you! I can't protect you even after I die!"

Alright, let's deal with this first.

I said, "Don't cry, don't cry, I'll take you into the city tomorrow, and go talk to Wang Gang."

Yun Mei asked: "You said you wanted to find Wang Gang, but do you know where he lives?"

I said, "It's not easy." Then I turned around and asked Gou Fugui, "Can you get that person's address?"

"It happens to be office hours, so I can contact the ghost messenger in the jurisdiction." Gou Fugui looked at me seriously, "But Comrade Lei Feng, the address is given to you, you can't cause any trouble."

Whether or not to cause trouble is not up to me, it depends on the fate of heaven.

"Hey, it's so lively." With a charming voice, Sanniang walked in with a smile, "What day is it today? Why are everyone here?"

Although she was smiling all over her face, I could clearly feel that she was suppressing the anger in her heart now, because she was holding the little wooden figure that Li Botong used as a substitute in her hand, and she was holding it tightly.I quickly turned my head to see that Li Botong had gone to nowhere.

This guy's escaping skills are well practiced.

"Isn't this Sanniang, you still go out so late." Wu Xiangwang greeted Sanniang, Gou Fugui said, "Don't go out so late, it's not safe."

Sanniang smiled and said, "Don't bother me, brother, I'm fine."

"I'm not worried about you." Gou Fugui said, "I'm worried about the ghosts in the village. Those are ordinary ghosts. They can't beat you. They are very dangerous if you go out in the middle of the night."

Sanniang ignored them, walked up to me and asked, "Brother Ma, did our house have guests just now?"

"Isn't that right?" I knew that she was asking about Li Botong, but I deliberately pointed at Wu Xiang and said, "This bastard broke our door."

Yun Mei asked: "San Niang, are you unhappy?"

Sanniang smiled charmingly: "I'm very happy." When I moved the hand holding the little wooden figure, there was a click, and the head of the little wooden figure broke off, rolled a few times on the ground, and stopped at my feet.

Then Sanniang smiled and said: "Brother Ma, you guys talk first, I'm tired, so I'll go back and rest first." She swayed back into the house.

"What?" The man said, "What is threemother angry about?"

"..." I said, "You should speak Chinese."

No wonder Sanniang was angry, Li Botong took her brother in, and even ran away several times. After chasing for a long time, I found out that it was me who was a double, and I wanted to beat Li Botong too.

In the morning, Gou Fugui sent Wang Gang's address.

Considering that the other party is a high-ranking official who has seen the big world, I must not be able to hold him down in terms of momentum alone, so I took Reddy Gaga, the only man with healthy limbs besides me in the small second floor.

Just about to go out, Yunmei asked, "What about the door of our house."

So Reddy Gaga and I worked together to put the door panel on.

Reddy Gaga was worried: "This door is broken, and if it is reinstalled, there will be thieves."

I said, "Don't worry, definitely not!"

Wu Xiang's body was still inserted straight into the door, which was more effective than the anti-theft door.

Wu Xiang cried and cried along the way: "Why am I so unlucky? Someone died, my wife and children were bullied, my house was about to be robbed, and my body was still stuck on the door."

You want to cry and I still want to cry, what have you done to my door panel!

When I got to the city, I got off at a bus stop and looked at the bus sign. I was comparing the address that Gou Fugui gave me. Reddy Gaga suddenly poked me with his finger and said mysteriously: "Look over there! Look! Look! !"

There was a taxi stand next to it, and there were several people standing waiting to take a taxi. I saw the profile of a tall and thin man at a glance.This man's dress is not very weird, but when I saw him, I felt a little weird.

As if he noticed that I was looking at him, the man turned his head. His face was relatively long, expressionless, his eyes protruded a little, and he looked a little nervous.

Two words instantly appeared in my mind - gambler!
I asked, "Can you catch him?"

"No." Reddy Gaga said, waving his hands, "They're sure they won't succeed."

I said, "For safety's sake, let's find a way to catch him."

"Oh." Reddy responded with a quack, and suddenly pointed at the man and shouted: "There is a thief!"

I didn't expect him to yell such a sentence suddenly, I turned my head to look, and saw several people standing beside the tall and thin man, and one of them had his hand stuffed into the tall and thin man's pocket.

The people next to them looked at them one after another.

I suddenly understood that Reddy Gaga didn't see a gambler just now, but saw someone stealing money and told me.

Ordinary ghosts, ordinary people can't even see them, let alone steal money.The gambler we're looking for is a ghost, but the tall, thin one has a body.

The appearance is similar, but this guy should not be a gambler.

The tall and thin man looked at us in a daze, then at the thief, he laughed, and said, "Don't touch it, I can't even touch the money myself." His voice was weak and very hoarse.

The thief glared at us fiercely, and wanted to run away, but was caught by the tall and thin man.The thief rolled his eyes, took out a knife from his pocket, and stabbed the tall and thin man's abdomen vigorously!

The tall and thin man froze, and looked down at his stomach, but he still didn't let go.

"Ah! Ah!" The onlookers shouted in panic, "A thief has stabbed someone!"

"Murder!"

A police car happened not far away, and the policeman got out of the car and came over, asking, "What's wrong?"

"Murder! The thief killed!" A curly-haired elder sister danced and shouted.

The policeman immediately ran to the tall and thin man and asked, "What's going on?"

"Hehehehe..." To everyone's surprise, the tall and thin man let out a hoarse laugh again, raised his head and said to the policeman, "It's all right." Then he took the thief's hand holding the knife and said, "He missed I."

The knife was glowing with a cold light, without a trace of blood.

"Oh~" The onlookers heaved a sigh of relief.Reddy Gaga said to me, "Look, I just said they're not going to make it."

The thief caught by him looked straight, and said strangely: "I obviously felt stabbed..."

The policeman looked at the thief, then at the tall and thin man, and asked seriously, "He stole from you, right?"

Reddy raised her hand and shouted, "Yes."

The tall and thin man glanced at us, and laughed again: "No, we are friends." He turned up his pocket, "Look, I don't have a dime on me, and he has nothing to steal." He put his hand on the thief's shoulder as he said, "We're making a bet, we're just kidding, aren't we?"

The thin and tall man was obviously the one who was stolen, but now he turned to help the thief to speak, not to mention our group of onlookers, even the thief was stunned, opened his mouth halfway, and then came to his senses and nodded again and again :"Yep!"

A few people next to him seemed to be the thief's accomplices, and they all said, "We're just kidding."

The police were still watching them suspiciously.The tall and thin man raised his voice slightly, and said to the thief, "Do you accept my bet?"

As soon as I heard him talk about gambling, my heart skipped a beat. No matter how I looked at it, I felt that there was something wrong with being thin and tall. He looked natural, as if he was forced to say this. Now that the public opinion is on his side again, he has no reason to help The thief speaks.

And what he calls the 'gamble'...

But seeing that tall and thin man standing in the crowd, everyone around could see him, so he didn't look like a ghost at all.

The thief was also puzzled by Monk Zhanger, but because the police were present, he had to agree to whatever the tall and thin man said, and said quickly, "Of course, we are brothers."

The police must feel that these people are wrong now, but they all said that there is no problem and they can't do anything. They frowned and asked, "Are you all right?"

"Hehehe." The tall and thin man smiled contentedly, and said, "It's okay."

The police looked at them again, and then went back to the police car and left.

"Well, I owe you a favor today. Count me as a friend. You are very loyal!" Seeing the policeman leaving, the thief nodded at the tall and thin man and wanted to leave, but was held back by the tall and thin man: "Hey? Didn't you agree? Want to gamble?"

"Huh?" The thief asked, "What are you betting on?"

The tall and thin man didn't speak, but looked at Reddy Gaga and me.The thief next to him immediately understood, and said fiercely: "What are you looking at, is it good-looking?"

I immediately turned my head with the other onlookers, and Reddy Gaga said stupidly: "It looks good." I turned his head sideways: "What aesthetics, don't look at it! Look over here, I'm more than He looks much better." After speaking, he glanced out of the corner of his eye, and saw that the tall thin man with glowing eyes was talking to the thief, halfway through speaking, he looked towards us again, as if he knew that I was looking at him.

This man is really sensitive.

I immediately look away.

Pixiu said, "You have to be careful with that person."

I don't need to be reminded by Pixiu, I can also see that there is something wrong with that thin and tall man.

The body shape and characteristics are exactly the same as the gambler, and the words are also gambled. The only difference is that the gambler has been dead for hundreds of years. The gambler they saw a while ago was a ghost, but the person in front of them is alive.

The most obvious evidence is that no one can see Wu Xiang standing beside us, but everyone can see the tall and thin one.

Just this one difference can overturn all the previous similarities.

After talking with the thief, the tall and thin man got into a taxi and left.

At this time, the bus passing by Wang Gang's community came. When the bus stopped, the door was right in front of me. I turned around and greeted Reddy, "Reddy..."

Everyone knows that crowding the bus is a popular form of exercise for the people of our country, so the moment the bus stopped and I turned around and called out the first two words, I saw the crowd rushing behind me.According to Wu Xiang, the two shouts of '嘎~~~~~嘉~~~~~' behind me were extremely long, and an old lady behind me said: "You are a sinner, see how you squeeze the young man into Yelling like Donald Duck."

I didn't move a step, and I was led into the car by the crowd without my feet touching the ground. Reddy Gaga looked at me anxiously from behind the crowd, trying to squeeze in but was pushed out.

It is said that the effect of force is mutual, and now I feel how small and insignificant the power of the individual is in the power of crowds.

In a blink of an eye, I was squeezed into the car. I quickly found a seat and sat down and looked out the car window. If this stupid Reddy Gaga couldn't keep up with the car, he would definitely get lost.

Just as I was thinking about it, I saw a few people push Reddy Gaga into the crowd who got into the car with the force of thunder, pushing and squeezing.

Wu Xiang said, "Aren't these the thieves?"

I took a closer look, only to realize that it was indeed those thieves. Several groups of thieves crowded Reddy Gaga into a pile. Di Gaga took out a red cloth wallet from his pocket.

They stole Reddy Quack!
After the wallet was in hand, those people immediately retreated from the crowd. Reddy Gaga was rushed into the car by the crowd, and came to me panting.

The thief was laughing at us below with his wallet: "That man even bet us that we wouldn't be able to steal this fool's money. Didn't we steal it?"

Another said: "He said if he won, where should we find him?"

"Chaoyang Community."

Seeing their complacent looks, I became angry, and turned my head to Reddy Gaga and said, "Why don't you be careful, how much money is there?"

"There's no money in there." Reddy Gaga said, "Isn't it all for you to do good deeds for me?" After finishing speaking, Reddy Gaga smiled, spread his hands, and actually held three wallets in his hand , "They take one, I take three, I'm more cost-effective."

The three thieves outside the car window saw the wallet, their faces changed, and they quickly took out their own pockets, but they must have taken out nothing.

This is the thief meeting the ancestor of the thief. I didn’t know who stole who. I was so happy that I shouted out of the car window: "What are you betting on? I lost the bet!"

The leading thief immediately opened Reddy Gaga's wallet and found that there was not a dime in it.

The other thieves were so angry that they wanted to come over and smash the car door. How could the driver let them do what they wanted, and immediately closed the door and started driving.

I was feeling proud when Pai Yao suddenly said: "That person's condition is wrong!"

I was taken aback, and subconsciously looked at the thief who seemed to be the leader, only to see his eyes wide open, his whole body twitching, and he fell down with a bang.

"Ah!" The crowd screamed.

A wisp of white smoke floated from the thief's body, and upon closer inspection, it turned out to be his soul, which was trying to burrow into his body.But there seemed to be a bigger force pulling the thief's soul, pulling his soul out abruptly!

I tried to look carefully again, but the bus drove far away, and I could only see the soul gathering into a white spot and flying towards the sky.

"Is this the case with death?" I asked.

"How is it possible." Pai Yao said, "It's obvious that someone has tampered with it."

I froze in my heart: "The tall and thin guy?" I immediately asked Reddy Gaga, "Where did the tall and thin guy go, they said?"

Reddy quack said: "Chaoyang Community."

"Isn't this the place we're going to?" Wu Xiang said, "Wang Gang's family lives there."

The tall and thin man's destination is also Wang Gang's house?
I yelled: "Driver, drive faster!"

The driver said calmly: "The bus doesn't have variable speed service, comrade, you should take a taxi."

I took out my pocket and kept all the big bills at home. I only had 20 yuan in my pocket, which was definitely not enough to take a taxi.

The bus stops and goes and goes around in circles for the station, which is definitely not as good as the taxi he took.It was already an hour and a half later when we arrived at Chaoyang Community, so I got out of the car and ran to the community.Wang Gang's house is on the first floor. I just ran to the door of the building when I saw a person walking out slowly.

Wu Xiang said: "This person really came here!"

The man was thin and tall, wearing a black windbreaker, looking like a bamboo pole, it was the tall and thin man!

The guy laughed hehehehe as he walked, and he was still playing three dice in his hand.

I immediately stood ready and dodged to hide behind Reddy Gaga, who knew that Reddy Gaga moved faster than me, and immediately squatted down and drew on the ground with my fingers, exposing me to the eyes of the enemy.

The passing residents all stopped when they saw our posture.

The tall and thin man threw the dice into the sky, then waved his hand around his head, and the three dice were firmly held between his fingers!

Reddy quickly ran over to take a look. After reading it, he let out a ouch, ran out, and said to me, "Look at that spot on the outside!"

I just noticed that on the side of the dice facing the outside, the numbers from left to right are one, two, three!

The thin and tall man let out a ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha laugh again, did not speak, and stared at me conceitedly.

This is a blatant provocation!
I am a person who has seen the big world, how can I be overwhelmed by him, I threw my hand to the sky, and saw a few red portraits of Chairman Mao slowly descending, and the surrounding residents hurried up to snatch them up, and scattered when they were finished .

The tall and thin man looked at me strangely, and laughed disdainfully: "Are you showing that you are rich and powerful?"

"That's not it," I said cheerfully, "This money is yours, I don't feel bad about it." And I just threw out a few, and the big head was still in my pocket.

The tall and thin man touched his pocket, his face changed drastically: "When did you steal it?" Then he looked at Reddy Gaga again, "You..."

"You're welcome, you're welcome." Reddy giggled beside him: "This is called Jiyangde, otherwise you will go to hell if you die."

I was giving Reddy a thumbs up when I heard a scream from inside the building, and then someone yelled, "Come on! Something happened!"

(End of this chapter)