Pillow Book of Talmud Wisdom

Chapter 7 Do not do to yourself what others do not want you to do to yourself—Jews talk about treating yourself well (1)
The Jews believe that "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" should be a principle that applies in both directions: a healthy and sound ethical and moral system should not only have the requirement of "do unto others as you would have them do unto you", but should also have the requirement of "do unto others as you do to yourself". Do not do to yourself what you do not want to be done to yourself”.After a little analysis, it is not difficult to see that all forms of the principle of "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" contain certain assumptions about human nature.

As the "Talmud" says: be kind to yourself every moment.

Embarrassing yourself is the greatest stupidity
Too many people lament the limited life and the hardships of life, but only a few people can live out their own happiness in the limited life.Whether a person is happy or not depends mainly on what?It mainly depends on a mentality, especially how to treat yourself kindly.

There are always troubles in life. Sometimes the troubles in life are not because of how much you get or how much you have, but because you want more.People sometimes want too much, but their ability is difficult to achieve, so we feel disappointed and dissatisfied.Then, we torture ourselves, saying that we are "too stupid" and "not up to date", etc., so we often struggle with ourselves and compete with ourselves.

In fact, calm down and think about it carefully, many things in life are not because your ability is not strong, but because your wishes are unrealistic.We must believe that our talents have the ability to do various things. Of course, believing in our abilities does not mean forcing ourselves to do things that we cannot do.In fact, everything in the world has a limit, beyond this limit, many things may be extremely absurd.We should always affirm ourselves, try our best to develop what we can develop, and leave the rest to God with peace of mind.As long as we do our best, as long as we actively move towards a higher goal, we will keep a sense of leisure in our hearts.Therefore, we will no longer have trouble with ourselves, blame and resent ourselves, because we have tried our best.

So, don't make things difficult for yourself, you must know that everyone has one or another flaw, and there is no perfect person in the world.Thinking about it this way is not to excuse myself, but to prevent my heart from being squeezed to pieces, and to maintain a good understanding of life and persistent pursuit forever.

Don't make things difficult for yourself, it is a kind of spiritual relief, it will prompt us to calmly walk the path of our choice and do what we like.

Really, if we are unhappy, we must learn to forgive ourselves, so that there will be less shadow in our hearts.This is not only the love for oneself, but also the cherishment of life.

Someone asked Antisthenes, the ancient Greek university student: "What do you get from philosophy?" He replied: "The ability to talk to yourself."

To talk to yourself is to discover yourself, to discover another more real self.

In fact, aren’t we ourselves our best confidants?Who else in the world can know himself best than himself?Who else can keep a secret for himself better than himself?Friends, when you are irritable and bored, you might as well talk to yourself, let your heart retreat into your soul, make yourself in close contact with yourself, calm down and listen to the voice of your soul, and ask yourself: Why am I troubled?Why not fast?Are you satisfied with this kind of life?Where is my way of dealing with people?Am I still pursuing success at work?Do I want to be what I am now?If my life ends like this, will I have any regrets?Have I let life overwhelm or bury me?So far in life, what have I gained and what have I lost?What else do I want to pursue...

In this way, in your own world, you can slowly restore your injured dignity, be "satisfied" without any scruples, and analyze yourself naked.You can also convince yourself, move yourself, and conquer yourself.A writer said a passage that makes sense: "Convincing yourself is a kind of intellectual victory; being moved by yourself is a kind of spiritual sublimation; conquering yourself is a kind of maturity in life. "After convincing, moving, and conquering ourselves, what kind of setbacks, pains, and misfortunes in life can we not conquer?

An open and quiet spiritual space is part of a good life.I believe that each of us has such a spiritual haven in our hearts. When we are tired and bored in the journey of life, we might as well walk into the hut of our own soul, calm down, and let the trivial things, life Temporarily throw away the worries of the past, quietly, quietly, and listen to the voice of your own heart!
gain self-awareness and understanding

Harvard University psychologist Rob?White, in his book "Life in Progress: A Study of the Natural Growth of Personality", mentioned that there is a very popular idea today, that is, "Man must adjust himself to adapt to the various pressures of the surrounding environment." He also Point out that this concept is based on an ideal, which means that "people can adapt to various narrow channels, monotonous routines, mandatory regulations, and pressures to complete roles and tasks without any problem. But the actions they take Whether it is successful depends on whether it has the ability to reject, help to grow or improve the role: and to be able to create and show positive strength-in other words, in the process of its growth, it must have a creative approach and manner."

Only a few have the courage to stand out, or have a clear idea of ​​what they stand for.Our behavior is usually influenced by the public, such as clothing, food, housing, and even the way we think.If our surroundings don't match our personality, we can become neurotic or unhappy, feeling lost and confused.

An American doctor once conducted such a study: After [-] banquet guests tasted the same food, half of them got food poisoning, but the other half were safe and sound. He felt curious and wanted to know the mystery. It turns out that those who are not poisoned have a more positive attitude towards life, have high self-worth, are more open-minded about things, and are more flexible in dealing with the world. Big and strong.In other words, the greater the heart energy, the healthier the person because the immune system is stronger.In fact, regarding the size and strength of mental energy, it affects all aspects of a person. Doctors, psychologists and others have already put forward various theories and experimental results.

Su Qi, a 26-year-old public relations manager, turned into a deflated ball after falling out of love.She said, I am an ugly duckling with broken wings, and the whole world has abandoned me.However, she forgot that this lovelorn Su Qi is the only Su Qi in the world.If she learns to like herself and love herself, she won't be so stupid.

She should tell herself: Without me, my self would be a dead letter; without me, my life would come to an abrupt end; without me, my world would be in ruins.Although I am but a drop in the ocean in the universe, to myself I am all.For this reason, I value myself first, so that I can be valued by others; I must treat myself well, so that I can be worthy of the gift of the Creator.

The beautiful Su Qi finally learned to introspect, lying on the bed at night and saying to herself, what's wrong with me?Why abuse yourself like this?I used to be able to persuade others so well when I was working on projects, why couldn't I get out of this injury?Think about it carefully, there is nothing wrong with me.He was wrong, he played with my feelings.He should be sad, not me.So what am I for?After several nights of introspection, Su Qi finally found the crux of the problem: self-esteem, narrow self-esteem.It turned out that from a young age, she had never been indifferent from others. Her pain was not because of the man she lost, but because of her own narrow self-esteem.So she said to herself, now I understand that that kind of self-esteem is not acceptable, it is just a phantom of vanity, and a solid self-esteem comes from true self-love.I love myself, what else can I be ashamed of?In this way, denying her own vanity, Su Qi no longer suffers, she quickly walks out of the hurt of broken love, and calmly accepts the celebration of maturity.

Self-love is not narcissism. A person who loves himself understands the importance of "comparing his heart to his heart".A person who loves himself understands that life is not easy to come by. In order to obtain unlimited enrichment in his limited life, he will tap his own potential and do his best for his goals; Dignity, he will not bow his knees for the immediate interests, let alone be arrogant and unreasonable to others for his own success; a self-loving person is spiritually independent, he does not need to rob others, let alone betray himself; finally, A person who truly loves himself is at peace because of his own enrichment, and he walks into the freedom and harmony of "not happy with things, not sad with oneself".

learn how to get along with yourself

In fact, the power of the mind is very easy to cultivate, because the human mind is very simple, the only requirement is to believe in yourself, affirm yourself, believe that you are a good person, be diligent, hardworking, serious, frugal, and affirm your own Generosity, kindness, kindness... However, the biggest difficulty for people to believe in themselves is that people are always comparing with others: I am not good enough because others are better than me; I am not kind enough because someone is more kind than me; I am not beautiful enough, because……

(End of this chapter)