12 Mindfulness Lessons Listened to at Tsinghua University

Chapter 32: This and That (2)
It is completely understandable for parents to hope that their children will become dragons and their daughters will become phoenixes, but as an adult, everyone knows that life is full of variables. Instead of placing your huge and distant hopes on a weak child who still needs our help , is almost equivalent to reserving disappointment for yourself.I am not opposed to wishing my son to become a dragon or a phoenix, but I am more inclined to become a dragon or a phoenix myself.But then again, Jackie Chan and Cheng Feng don't mean they can finish everything in one day.Today's things must be done today, so tomorrow's things should also be discussed tomorrow.

For others, they are better at forcing themselves: forcing themselves to be unhappy, forcing themselves to sleep, forcing themselves to think all day long.

There is nothing wrong in the world, and mediocrity disturbs itself.Whenever they think of the fable of "Worries", many people can't help laughing: there are still such stupid people in the world.In fact, he is not the only one who is stupid. There are definitely not a few modern scumbags who are looking for troubles and worrying about gains and losses in life, even you and me.Although we are not stupid enough to worry that the sky will collapse one day, we often can't help worrying: what if we get seriously ill one day?What if I become unemployed in the future?What should I do if I suddenly encounter bad luck?As the saying goes: The environment is born from the heart. If a person has too many worries in his heart, he will look forward and backward, be afraid of wolves in the front, and tigers in the back, and even have restless sleep and food.In the end, you will be upset by yourself, not to mention, it will also affect your physical and mental health.

Tomorrow is always an unknown.Worrying about the unknown tomorrow will only make the originally happy today unhappy.

Some people are used to taking some gains and losses or even expected gains and losses very seriously, even above all else, and they always care about it and worry about it.Give up, I always feel that I have suffered a loss, and I am unwilling; keep pursuing, and I am afraid that the gain will not be worth the loss.I have a headache for this all day long, but just like the little monk in the aforementioned story who cannot shake the fallen leaves of tomorrow, worrying about things that haven’t happened yet, and even if they happen, we can’t do anything about them. benefit?
Instead of this, it is better to let go of attachments and troubles, drink a few cups of light wine of life, try to accept the incompleteness of life, and live today's life seriously.This kind of "living along" and being muddled in the world seems to be a negative way of life, but it is actually the most authentic attitude towards life.Although life is unsatisfactory nine out of ten times, many things are not as serious as you think.Many things have room for maneuver and variables.People who are used to worrying and worrying about the future often think of bad possibilities and bad changes.Taking a step back, even if tomorrow is destined to be sad, we don't need to pay for the sadness in advance.

On the other hand, people who worry about the future seem to be planning for a rainy day, but they are actually a sign of lack of self-confidence.We must be responsible for our own tomorrow, and try our best to make corresponding arrangements, but the responsibility belongs to the responsibility, and the arrangement belongs to the arrangement, and the changes are often faster than the plan.There is a saying in the West that "responsibility and today belong to us, but the ending and the future belong to God", which explains the helplessness of life and the necessity of an optimistic and open-minded attitude.So, when you are depressed about tomorrow, you may wish to think about the anecdotes of the sages who are "rarely confused".When you learn to be calm and hold on to the muddled mentality of "the car must have a road when it reaches the mountain, and the boat will be straight when it reaches the bridge", no matter how complicated and changeable your future life is, it will be nothing more than "soldiers come to block, water comes to earth". That's all.

On the contrary, if we are obsessed with those troubles that have not yet happened, we are always exhausted for them, and we always hold on to a savior mentality of "everyone is drunk but I am alone", which will undoubtedly make us exhausted. "There is a loss" not to mention, for an uncertain future, but lost the present that could have been grasped, how can we guarantee the beauty of the future?
Let's talk about tomorrow's affairs tomorrow, today's boat can't carry tomorrow's many worries.No matter how much we worry about tomorrow, tomorrow's unsatisfactory will eventually come unexpectedly.What we can do is to postpone the beauty of tomorrow on the basis of living well today.

4.Moment is forever, now is eternity
If you want to live to 150 years old, you must have a higher and happier quality of life. It is a great thing to be able to live out the most extreme state that nature has given us human beings.For me, it's all about living in the moment and being happy.

——Zhang Chaoyang (Chairman and CEO of Sohu, once delivered a speech at Tsinghua University)
There is a famous "Arrow Metaphor Sutra" in the Buddhist scriptures, which tells that when the Buddha was alive, a young monk named Man Tongzi went to visit the Buddha and asked 14 consecutive questions:
1.Does the world always exist?

2.Won't the world always exist?

3.Is the world both constant and impermanent?

4.Is the world impermanent, impermanent?
5.Does the world have boundaries?
6.Is the world boundless?
7.Is the world boundless and boundless?

8.Is the world boundless or infinite?

9.Is life the self?

10.Isn't life and self the same?
11.Does the Buddha still exist after death?

12.Does Buddha not exist after death?

13.Did the Buddha exist and not exist after death?

14.Does Buddha not exist after death?

These 14 questions, I believe that many people still ask them endlessly until today. These are also 14 difficult questions to answer, but it is not difficult for the Buddha at all, because he does not answer at all.The reason why he didn't answer it was because he didn't think the questions made sense at all.

Even so, the Buddha could not simply dismiss the word "meaningless", so he told Man Tongzi and his disciples such a parable: "It's like someone was hit by a poisoned arrow. His relatives were very anxious, and immediately sought a doctor for him to treat the arrow wound. However, the man who was hit by the arrow thought that before drawing the arrow to cure the poison, he must first clarify the following questions: What is the doctor's name? How tall, short, fat, or thin? Is the skin color black or white? ?Is the bow that shot at me made of mulberry wood, Zhe wood or ox horn? Is the bowstring made of ox tendon, deer tendon or silk? Is the color of the bow black or white? Red or yellow? Is the arrow shaft made of bamboo or Is the arrow feather made of wood? Are the arrow feathers vulture feathers, crane feathers, or chicken feathers? Are the arrowheads shaped like spears or knives? Who is the name of the craftsman who made the arrowheads? Is the land south or north? This is really a fool, because he will die of poison before he can figure out these problems. What's the point of solving these problems? Solving the problem of poisoning is not only a priority, but also a fundamental problem."

Misled by the feudal class in the past dynasties, many people believe that studying Buddhism solves the problems of the afterlife, that is, reincarnation, karma, heaven, hell, and so on.In fact, Buddhism talks about the afterlife, more about this life; about eternity, more about the present.

Live in the moment - this is the exhortation of Buddhism.The so-called present is originally the unit of time in Buddhism. In the concept of ordinary people, the second is the smallest unit of time, but in the concept of time in Buddhism, the smallest unit of time is the present. 60 moments are a moment, and 60 moments are worth one second.In other words, we have to divide one second into 3600 parts and live in every tiny moment.To live well in every moment is to live well in eternity.

Why live in the moment?Because we can only live in the present moment forever.Professor Wu Weiku of Tsinghua University told an allusion when talking about this concept:
One day, the Buddha told a story to King Pasenadi: Once upon a time, a man was playing in the wilderness, and suddenly a ferocious elephant came and chased him violently. He was very scared and wanted to run away but had no place to hide. Looking left and right, he found that there was an empty well not far in front of him, and there was a big tree beside it, so he climbed the roots of the tree and went down into the well.Halfway down the well, he found two mice, black and white, gnawing at the roots of the tree together; there were four poisonous snakes around the well, each uttering a message to bite this person; looking at the bottom of the well, there was also a poisonous dragon.This man was afraid of dragons and snakes, and he was afraid that the roots of the tree would be broken.At this time, he saw a ripe strawberry growing within his reach, which looked delicious.

Now, the person has four options: going up, going down, hanging in the air, or eating strawberries. Which one should he choose?The answer is to eat strawberries, because all he can grasp is that strawberry.Some people will say, if you are about to die, do you still have the mood to eat?The question is - isn't he still dead?Opportunities arise in the dynamics, maybe the elephant will leave after a while, and he can still climb up.

Living in the present is not to let people muddle along, as long as today does not care about tomorrow, but to let people strive for the future on the basis of living today in a down-to-earth manner.

Living in the present is to let people let go of their attachment to life, grasp the only present moment they can grasp, and do what they can do at hand.

During the Han Dynasty, a great Confucian named Xia Housheng accidentally offended the emperor, and together with a small official named Huang Ba, was sent to death row, waiting to be executed.Huang Ba was optimistic by nature. He had admired Xia Housheng's knowledge for a long time, but he had no chance to get close to him. Now he was locked in the same cell due to an unexpected disaster. It's just around the corner, why don't you hurry up and make up for this lesson?" Huang Ba then told Xia Housheng that he wanted to ask for advice.Xia Housheng smiled bitterly and said: "We have all committed capital crimes and will be executed tomorrow. What's the use of reading?" In the moment, grasp the present, gain something from what you have learned, and understand something from your heart. Today is happiness, why bother about the illusory tomorrow?" Xia Housheng was refreshed when he heard this, and was greatly moved in his heart, and immediately agreed to Huang Ba request.From then on, the two sat on the ground.Every day, Xia Housheng taught Huang Ba the "Shangshu" with all his heart. Huang Ba listened attentively to the lectures.The guards in the prison were puzzled, and they couldn't figure out why the two dying people were so happy.Later, when this matter reached the emperor's ears, he also lamented that the two men were so virtuous and could not bear to kill them.Later, when the world came to amnesty, the two were not only exonerated from the death penalty, but were also directly proclaimed into the imperial court and became officials again.

"Wine and song, life geometry"?Humans live to be a hundred years old, but only more than 3 days, and it is only a matter of time.Some people divide life into three days, tomorrow, tomorrow and today.In fact, life is but one day.Because yesterday has passed, whether it is good or bad, it has passed and will never come again; tomorrow has not yet come, whether it is good or bad, it is still the future, and we cannot advance it.To put it cruelly, tomorrow is only a "possible existence", and no one can guarantee that he will definitely see the sun tomorrow.We can grasp, only today.If you don't grasp well today, it will become a painful yesterday.If you don't grasp it well today, you won't get much better tomorrow.

To live in the moment, at a deep level, is to let us live a chic and comfortable life, and not to worry about unnecessary things.

To put it bluntly, two people quarreled yesterday, and today they are still angry at each other—they did not live today, but lived yesterday.

Speaking of Dali, we must get used to looking at the autumn moon and spring breeze, adapt to the current social environment, adapt to the ups and downs of life, accept those people and things that make us unhappy, and cultivate the broadest mind.

5.There is no regret button in life
Don’t forget what you once had; cherish what you have got more; don’t give up what belongs to you; keep what you have lost as a memory; you must work hard to get what you want; when you are tired, put your heart on the shore; don’t regret the choice; only understand when it is hard Satisfaction; enjoy life only when it hurts; understand strength only when it hurts; there is always a windy morning; there is always a gorgeous dusk; there is always a shooting star night.Life is like a one-way ticket that never returns. There is no rehearsal, and every game is broadcast live.Grasping each performance well is the best treasure in life.

——Shaku Shichang (Professor of Tsinghua University)

(End of this chapter)