The Psychology of Microexpressions: Psychological Strategies in Relationships

Chapter 6 The psychological code hidden behind the behavior - the psychological strategy in body language (2)
Arms on hips, an attack

This pose is a sign of self-confidence and psychological superiority.If you add that the feet are slightly wider than the shoulders, it will make the whole body of the person look swollen, and there is often a potential aggressiveness.If coupled with the action of tapping the ground with the toes, it implies leadership and authority.This stance shows readiness for battle and is often used by cowboys in shootouts.Even a single arm on the hip can still send a very obvious message of aggression, especially when the bent elbow is pointed at the target of the attack.

Hands on hips, the unique posture of successful people
The posture of hands on hips is also considered to be a unique posture of successful people. These people like to adopt this posture when they are moving towards their goals. This posture can often be seen in the photos of some successful people .In addition, men with a tendency to challenge and move forward often adopt this posture in front of some women to maintain their masculine image and express their combative character.If a woman adopts this posture, it will give people a very uncomfortable feeling, and it will give people a feeling of domineering, tigress, or lion roaring.

Hands on hips, with strong explosive power

Some people like to put their hands on their hips, and they are used to putting their hands on their waists whether they are sitting for a long time, getting up to move around, or talking to friends.Some people don't even forget to walk with their hips on their hips. They walk with their upper body forward and their hands on their hips like a sprinter.These people tend to have a strong explosive power to do things.

When we see a person with his hands on his hips, we should consider the specific situation and his previous body language, so as to ensure that we can make an accurate judgment on his attitude.

Eyes can't hide a person's true motives

In our body language, the signal conveyed by eyes is the most valuable and accurate, because it is the focus of conveying bodily sensations, and the movement of pupils is independent, conscious, and not controlled by consciousness.Therefore, when we observe a person's heart, we must first observe his eyes.

If we like to read martial arts novels, we will often see such descriptions: this person (usually a martial arts master who hides himself) is dressed in rags, and there is nothing extraordinary about him, but his eyes are piercing and sharp like a falcon generally.There is a reason for martial arts novelists to write this way, because the eyes are the windows of the soul, and a person's thoughts and energy will be revealed through the eyes, which cannot be concealed.Therefore, if we want to understand a person, we must first observe his eyes.

know a person by looking
(1) Self-confident people usually have firm and deep eyes, while those with low self-esteem have dark and blurred eyes, and they generally dare not look at others squarely.

(2) People with lofty aspirations have persistent eyes; while those who are shallow have eyes that often float.

(3) A greedy person’s eyes are exposed, just like a big bad wolf seeing a little sheep; a selfish person’s eyes are restrained, as if he is afraid that others will see through his mind.

Through the eyes to see the secrets of a person's heart

(1) If a person keeps shaking his eyes from side to side, it means that he is thinking hard about a certain problem.

(2) If a person keeps staring at the other person's eyes, it means that there must be something else hidden in his heart.

(3) If a person looks at someone sideways, it means that he is very interested in this person, but he doesn't want to be known by the other person.

(4) If a person suddenly looks down while talking, it means that he has entered a state of meditation.

(5) If a person raises his eyes to look at others, it means that he is full of respect and trust for this person.

(6) If a person quickly glances at the opposite sex and then turns his eyes away, it means that he is very interested in the opposite sex in front of him.

(7) When a person looks at the other person while talking, it means that he wants to emphasize what he has said and hopes that the other person will respond.

(8) If a person looks down at the other party with his eyes, it means that he wants to show a kind of majesty.

Defensive people like to keep their arms crossed
In life, many men will pose with their arms crossed, especially some leaders, who favor this movement even more.Whether viewed from the front or from behind, this pose creates a sense of denial, defensiveness, and negation.So what does it actually mean?

Whether it's someone you know or someone you don't know, as long as he puts his arms crossed in front of you, it will always give people a feeling of rejection, defense and denial.

standard arms crossed

This posture can be seen everywhere, and wherever it is, it often indicates a defensive or negative attitude.This pose is always crossed when a person is among strangers, or shows impatience while waiting in line for an elevator.This shows that he is very dissatisfied with the current situation.

arms crossed and fists clenched

If a person, with arms crossed and fists clenched, is a hostile, defensive attitude.People who assume this posture are often accompanied by clenching of the teeth and flushing of the face.This pose is obviously aggressive and shows that he has been irritated by something.If you don't understand the reason at this time, you should adopt a humble attitude, stretch out your palms, and explore the reason.

Arms crossed and hands clasped

In addition to the above two situations, there is also a posture of crossing the arms, which is also relatively common, that is, the posture of grasping the arms.This situation is often seen among patients waiting in line in the hospital or passengers waiting for a flight that has been delayed at the airport. It is obvious that this gesture shows their dissatisfaction.

Therefore, in social situations, if you see this kind of expression, it means that the other party is very dissatisfied with the topic of your conversation. At this time, you should change your conversation method or change the topic immediately.

All in all, no matter what kind of crossed arms posture, as long as it appears in social, it is a bad suggestion. Therefore, when you are talking to someone, if you find the other person in this posture, you have every reason to speculate, Your point of view is denied or dissatisfied by the other party.If at this time, he is still verbally responding to you, don’t think that this is an affirmation of your point of view. If at this time, you are still bragging without any scruples, I’m afraid you are setting up more obstacles for yourself.At this time, the more effective method is to go forward, hand the other party a cup of tea, a book or something else, and force him to open his arms to take things. posture and attitude.

Anyway, this kind of posture makes people feel very unfriendly. Therefore, in life, try not to make such a posture, it is easy to give people a feeling of aloofness and inaccessibility.If a person always folds his arms in front of his chest habitually, he basically belongs to the type with a strong defensive mind, and unintentionally sets up a line of defense between himself and others, shutting others out and at the same time Make oneself lost a lot of valuable communication opportunities.

Therefore, friendliness is the true meaning of life, whether it is language or body movements, we should take this as a principle. [-]. Hands are more expressive than mouths In daily life, most people have several characteristic hand movements or gestures that are unique to them.For example, whenever "Napoleon" is mentioned, the image of a man with his hands in the pockets of his waistcoat and only a thumbs up will come to mind.There are many similar characters. The reason why everyone moves so much is because our hearts are different!
The ancients once said: "Ten fingers connect to the heart." When we have emotions and ideas, we will instinctively activate our hands to express them.According to research by human linguists, the hand is the place with the most sensitive sense of touch and the richest body language in the human body. It is more honest than the mouth and less likely to lie.Therefore, if we want to understand a person, we can observe his gestures to capture the real information he sends.

put your head in your hands
Such actions often appear in business clubs.When a seated person leans back and folds his hands behind his head, he is very comfortable and in a dominant position.For example, during a meeting, a supervisor may make such a gesture, but when the company boss walks in, such a gesture disappears immediately.

stretch arm
Such actions also occur frequently.Some people like to stretch their arms out and put them on other chairs.Such an action expresses a kind of self-confidence, like announcing to people: This is my territory.When asked an uncomfortable question, his arms would snap back.

put thumb in pocket

While standing, some people put their thumbs in their pockets and the other four fingers outside.Doing so can signal that the person is feeling uncomfortable or insecure.Such an approach is an expression of extreme lack of self-confidence, and people with higher positions should avoid such an approach.

Rub your hands
When in doubt or stress, people often rub one finger against the palm of the other hand.As the situation becomes more serious, the person will cross their fingers and make an up-and-down rubbing motion.Usually when the action of rubbing hands is made, it shows that the person involved is nervous or very disturbed.

stroking the neck
When talking, people often make the gesture of stroking the neck: stroke the neck with their hands, and then quickly put it back in place.When the speaker makes this gesture, although he speaks with great confidence, this is not the case.Rubbing the neck is a stress-relieving behavior that shows that the person is not very confident.Also, when a person is tense or feeling stressed, they also make such movements.

Support your head with your hands
During conversations or meetings, people often make the gesture of putting their hands on their heads.Such actions indicate that the person concerned is tired and does not want to listen to it anymore.They do this to keep their heads from drooping, or falling asleep unconsciously.Generally, he rests his chin on his fingers at first, and as his boredom grows, he completely stops his head with his palms.So when people put their hands on their heads, we'd better stop talking.

The movement of the mouth mirrors the activity of the heart
The mouth is an important channel for expressing personal emotions.When we are happy, happy, depressed, or irritable, we not only say them with our mouths, but also unconsciously make some small movements with our mouths.Therefore, we can observe a person's inner activities based on these small movements.

We can observe the inner workings of a person by the small movements of his mouth.Because the mouth is an important channel for expressing personal emotions.

Licking lips

If the weather is not very dry and a person keeps licking his lips, it means that the person is suppressing the inner fluctuations caused by excitement or tension.For example, when famous NBA stars are about to dunk, they often lick their lips.

Mouth backwards
When talking with someone, if a person's mouth is slightly turned back, it means that he is very interested in the other person's conversation and is concentrating on listening to the other person's conversation.

pout lips
The movement of a person's lips pursed forward may be a defensive heart in his heart, indicating that he holds a skeptical attitude towards the information from the outside world and hopes that the other party can give an affirmative answer.In addition, pouting your lips forward is also a kind of coquettish expression, and we have to judge it according to the situation at the time.

mouth drooping
When a person is unhappy, the corners of his mouth will droop, which is what we often call lip curling.According to research by body linguist Aaron Pease, if a person always has this habit, the corners of his mouth will always maintain such a posture, giving people a listless feeling.

Mouth pursed into the shape of "one"

When a person purses his mouth into a straight line, it means that he is making up his mind and is deciding whether he will do something or not.When encountering major decisions, many people will do this kind of action, and such people are usually relatively strong, with the spirit of never giving up until they achieve their goals.

bite lip with teeth
During a conversation, if a person bites his lip with his teeth, it means that he is introspecting or laughing at himself, or he may be condemning himself, which should be judged in detail according to the situation at that time.

cover mouth with hand

When a person likes to cover his mouth with his hands when meeting strangers, it shows that this person is very reserved and shy.If he puts his hand over his mouth while speaking, it means that he said something wrong and realized his mistake.Opening the mouth and sticking out the tongue also has this meaning, expressing regret.

(End of this chapter)