Featured by Frederick Floyd

Chapter 14 [-]
In the middle of the night on August 1966, 8, Fu Lei and his wife were suddenly ransacked by rebels and they were criticized for three days and four nights. In the middle of the night of September 30, Fu Lei and his wife left a suicide note and hanged themselves.

1966.1.4
Satoshi, dear boy:
I am eager to let you know the joy of receiving a letter from both of you, and also to let you see this letter before you go to Sweden, so I hurriedly write this short letter.At noon yesterday, I received letters from you, Mira, and your mother-in-law, as well as a package of photos. It seemed as if you had specially agreed to give us a big comfort. What's more, it was delivered by the same post!Your letter moved us very much. It is not a waste of our life to have a son like you, let alone a waste of effort in sowing seeds in the past.What we said, it turns out that you didn't take it as a deaf ear, but you can remember it one by one at the right time, and use it as a reference to your immediate experience and feelings.Ling Xiao grows up day by day, and the education you get from him will only increase day by day; people are like this: live, learn, learn, never learn!But neither you nor I will continue to think: I can’t learn, I don’t want to learn!On the contrary, we are all born with a thirst for knowledge above all else.Even if it is like planting roses, I am not willing to limit myself to playing well, but to study it as a science, and do textual research on this aspect during my recuperation.

When I mention Mozart, I can’t help but think of the Romance ["Romance"] and Fantasy ["Fantasia"] that you played when you were learning the final stage from Aunt Li (Hui Fang). I copied the scores and mounted them in Chinese style; later I played it to Baiqi (the first time I met him), and he said it was played by an artist, not a primary school student.These things and these words still seem to me like yesterday, and you probably remember them very clearly, don’t you?

Regarding Berlioz and Liszt, I have a lot of thoughts, but today my eyes and brain are not good enough, so I won’t write.Every time I listen to Berlioz, I always feel that he is more masculine, stronger and healthier than Debussy, and he should be a good model for creating our Chinese music.According to Romain Rolland, the real genius in French history (Romain Rolland has another definition of genius here, which roughly refers to the natural talent that gushes out like a tide, rather than the acquired hard work) composers are only Only with him.

Mira's letter this time is very emotional, and the words are really considerate. With such a good daughter-in-law, we can do it in a few lifetimes!I hope you are also content and proud of it. It is also your great fortune to have such a spouse, so don’t be blessed.With a young nanny at home, you have to be more careful everywhere, so as not to cause misunderstandings.

It's so much fun for you two to describe Ling Xiao's actions and smiles.You seldom cried when you were young, and you stopped crying when you cried, and your lips trembled unceasingly, but you have suppressed it: probably Ling Xiao is just like you.You are right: an innocent and pure child always reflects the advantages of his parents; education mainly lies in paying attention to his future development, as long as he shows signs of our shortcomings, we should try to prevent them.The scene of him lying under your piano is really like little Christopher. You used to think of yourself as a Christophe, and now there is another little Christopher, but he is luckier than you, because he has a more enlightened one. A more loving father! (You said in your letter that he was completely transferred, dreaming [completely moved, like a dream], it should be transported [infected]; the word "transferred [movement]" is only used for things, not for people. I remind you, lest I make mistakes when speaking on weekdays.) You will be conducting on the piano in mid-March, and we are as excited [excited] as you.Hope to do more mental preparation beforehand, don't be nervous!
Let's talk next time, take care of everything!
Dad January [-], [-]

Does Mira's silk padded jacket fit?Does it look good in clothes? I think she has a better understanding of us after watching "The Country Is So Many Beauties".

Min has played basketball well in the past year and won many honors for the school teaching team.He is already somewhat famous for teaching, and most middle schools in Beijing mention his name.I really work hard at ordinary times, and I am willing to use my brain to imagine for students and invent many vivid and interesting teaching methods.Even on Sunday, he was so busy that he didn't have time to wash his clothes. Most likely, Xiaorong went to help him, washing and sewing.They both lived very simply.Xiaorong wrote letters every week without interruption for a semester, such perseverance is really rare. (Min was too busy, she only came to say a few words in a few months, everything was reported by Xiao Rong.) This child is innocent, honest and kind, hardworking and hardworking.We are not only lucky for Min, but also for our family. Two good sons and two good wives are as affectionate as our own daughters. Mom can't tell how happy she is!

1966.4.13
Dear children:
Not answering letters for more than 100 days, which is a rare situation when you are not traveling for a long-term tour.I don't know how the performances of various concerts this year are?Have you practiced Liszt's sonata yet?Are you satisfied with the effect of your command on March 99?Did you go to the United States to collaborate with Tung at the end of January?Even if you are too busy to calm down, just reporting specific things will not be too much effort, right?What we have been arguing with you over the past few years is mainly the issue of letters. We are not demanding. It is enough to hear from you every two months.I always feel that the days are numbered, not to mention getting together, it is the pleasure of communicating with you, especially the joy of reading your letters, I don't know how long I can enjoy it.Twelve albums have been received for nearly a month, but I still dare not listen to them.The stylus of the old record player is thick and the cartridge is heavy, but the lines recorded on the recent film are very fine, and I am afraid that it will break immediately after singing.Your record player company STUDIO99 [[-] Studio] wrote a letter the day before yesterday, saying that the manufacturer has not delivered any new products this year, so it has been delayed until now.The goods will be available recently, and they will be sent to Yunyun soon.It will probably take two or three months to arrive in Shanghai, and it will be hot summer when the assembly is complete.At present, I can only enjoy the titles of the new films sent one by one, read the descriptions, and yearn for a while, and I have the right to fill my hunger with pictures.Is the impression of Paris slightly better this time, and what is the reaction of the masses? Mr. Etiemble [Etienne Boule] wrote a letter a week ago, saying that he regretted not being able to attend the meeting due to illness. During the spring break, he will go to the south to recover from his illness. I originally entrusted him to collect the Paris Review.If you have it on hand, I hope you can send it. Mom can return it to you after typing. I am very familiar with Salle Gaveau [Gavo Concert Hall]. Is the interior decoration still antique, with white and gold walls everywhere, in the style of the [-]th century?Is the violin used Gaveau [Gavo] brand?Have you come into contact with the three French brands Erard, Gaveau, and Pleyel [Erard, Gaveau, Pleyel]?What's your impression?I haven’t read any music magazines for more than two years, and I’m even less familiar with foreign music trends. If there are any journals worth subscribing to, please pay attention to them, regardless of whether they are in English or French. Music & Musicians ["Music and Musicians"] is indeed not exciting enough, but I feel depressed when I can't get any wind!

The cataracts in both eyes are still the same. It is said that the general progress is very slow, and sometimes it stops at a certain stage, and some progress is so slow that it cannot be noticed: I hope I can be so lucky.Otherwise, after a few years, when the cataract sclerosis occurs, surgery will be performed, but the visual acuity after surgery must not be compared with before. No matter how far or near you look, it must be limited to a strict and extremely small range.In addition, since January, chronic conjunctivitis has developed concurrently. The doctor said that the frequent fainting is caused by the secretion of conjunctivitis contaminating the lens.The disease is very severe, and it has been dragged on for several years.Everyone advised me to cultivate my body and mind, but my mind can never be blank, if it is not blank, my nerves will not be quiet, and my body will not get better!When I am free, I have random thoughts about the past and the present, and even stay outside the earth: not Dostoevsky's random thoughts, but many fantasies and emotions based on some historical knowledge in the boundless time and space.All in all, it is a common problem of intellectuals who are too ambitious. In modern terms, they are guilty of objectivism and have no class viewpoint... In fact, this kind of fantasy is also mixed with a lot of human primitive depression, feelings about birth, old age, sickness, death, and the purpose of life. Suspect.Our generation who grew up from the May [-]th Movement are more or less skeptics, just like people in the Renaissance and before the French Revolution in the [-]th century, but skepticism is the ideological enemy of the present society, no wonder I try to reform it no matter what. Not much.Assuming that Chinese scholars have been inclined to lament about life and death since ancient times, then they have been poisoned by the literati and landlord class (because they get something for nothing, they have the leisure for such fantasies).After all, I know all about my faults, but I will never get rid of them. Is it really the so-called "thoroughly reviewing and resolutely not changing"?I don't think so.The main reason is that our sense of time, or time sense [time sense] and space sense [space sense] are stronger than others. If life is just a fleeting moment, it is indeed a very real feeling to us, so we regard life as extremely small, Seeing the decades of consciousness as a flash is insignificant, and all unreal fantasies come from it, don't you think?Knowing that the idea of ​​floating life is against the times, but the older I get, the more I have this idea unexpectedly.Of course, I never reveal such remarks in front of others, and I never mentioned them before Amin Xiaorong. First, young people have their own ambition and enthusiasm, and I should not attack or discourage them; Ideas must never influence the next generation.Because you are abroad, and you have many similarities with me in temperament, so I will talk about it casually.If you don't have this kind of ideological root, I'm afraid you won't have such a deep feeling for some of Schubert's late works.

What are your plans for recording this year?Did I meet anyone in Paris who I knew back then, whether compatriots or French?In case there are no Paris clippings to send, at least tell me about the programs there!
Don't make us wait any longer for your letter!child!Take care of everything!
Ling Xiao wants to learn a lot more, tell us some short stories, okay?

Dad April [-], [-]
For more than a month, my mother often dreamed of you, sometimes conducting, sometimes playing concerto [concerto].I also dreamed that Mira and Ling Xiao were in our house.She loves and feels sad every time she wakes up.Last night, she said that now she feels that sleep is a pleasure, allowing herself to be two people and live two lives: every night before going to bed, there is a hope - not only to be reunited with the flesh and blood, but also to meet relatives and friends who have been separated for 20 years .I often dream of you too, and the music on your piano is very clear in my dreams.

I can see from the photo that you have a Chinese framed landscape painting, is it an authentic work or a replica?Is it modern or ancient?
There are only two sunny days in this month, and the rest is either cloudy or rainy. Spring in the south of the Yangtze River is hard to come by. The flower buds are still as big as peanuts after three weeks.He didn't take off his silk padded jacket either.

1966.6.3
Satoshi:
On May 99, the airline notified that the turntable had arrived in Shanghai.When I went to the interview, the customs said that the system stipulates that private individuals cannot send their goods back to China by "air cargo" from abroad.My mother asked for an accommodation, and the customs officers asked their superiors for instructions. After a week, they replied: "It must be handled according to the regulations, and the things can only be returned."Please refer to the consignor STUDIO99 [100 Studio] for the above situation.If you can use "ordinary mail" to send, you might as well give it a try.If the London Post Office refuses to accept the turntable because it weighs more than the package limit, or for other reasons, it has no choice but to give up.For example, if you were born in an era before the invention of the record 17 years ago, wouldn't you also be unable to hear your performance?If the turntable cannot be sent, or if it is still returned in Shanghai next time, there is no need to send the record again.Your father-in-law originally said that he would send a copy of his [-]th birthday commemorative record after it was published, please tell him to hold off for a few months until the turntable is settled.I misremembered that your father-in-law's birthday was [-], so the congratulatory telegram was sent five days late; he didn't mention it in his letter (only said he received a gift), so I wonder if he received the telegram?My eye disease has not improved, and chronic conjunctivitis cannot be cured.The kidneys are sagging by more than three inches, my back is often sore, and I can't sit for a long time, so I have to resign myself to fate.The "Cultural Revolution" was raging in China, and anti-Party cliques have been heard of in Britain.We were also thrilled at home. We never imagined that [-] years after the founding of the People's Republic of China, there were still elements of the remaining bourgeoisie who had sneaked into the party and dared to attack the party so rampantly.Perhaps people like us from the old society are too numb to class struggle.The more you write, the more dizzy your eyes will be. Let's talk about it next time.

Take care of everything!Say hello to Mira!Mom is making a sweater for Ling Xiao!
Dad June [-], [-]

I received both the letter and the photo of the child at the end of May.I understand all your feelings.It is a common thing that work is not going well, and it is the exception, and they are all the same.I'm physically and mentally exhausted, and the pain of work (in the past) is much worse than yours.

My mother was sick for a month in early May. It was herpes zoster caused by a virus [virus]. It was very uncomfortable on the left chest and left back.Healed now.

(End of this chapter)