Fifth personality SwanLake

Chapter 39: Joke [Extra] Only the mask can understand the clown's sadness (9)

Death to live?I can't choose either. I am afraid of death and life at the same time.

I thought I would die like this, but God made another joke on me.

When I woke up again, I was awakened by the pain, the pain from my legs spread to the whole body, and I couldn't bear the pain.

"Are you awake? I'm sorry, because your leg bones are completely broken, so I replaced you with a mechanical leg." A blond girl with blue eyes appeared in my eyes, she was wearing an orange T-shirt and dark blue overalls, and she wears a brown hat with a telescope in it.Her appearance overlapped with the Alice in my memory again.

"Trey West" I really want to call out this name, but I find that I can't make a sound, I just feel my nose is sore, and there is a cool liquid slipping from my face.

Alice. The Mad Hatter has found you.

"Hey? Why are you crying? I, I, I didn't change your mechanical legs on purpose without your permission. If I don't change them, you may die." The girl panicked from her overalls. I took out a few pieces of paper from my pocket and wiped away my tears.

I smile.

"Thank you." I realized that was the only way I could tell her. Seeing her like this, she must be doing well, right?I observed the surrounding environment of her house, it is very good, her house is full of all kinds of robots, it seems that she has fulfilled her dream and became a mechanic like her father.

There's no need for me to disturb her life anymore, right?After all, Alice has left Wonderland and returned to her own life. She is just a little lunatic and cannot interfere with Alice's life.

There is a kind of liking, called inferiority complex.

"By the way, what's your name? My name is Tracy, how about you? You look a lot like one of my childhood friends, the only one I have. He has the same fiery red curly hair as you." Tracy His eyes sparkled brightly when he looked at me.

I was silent.

Alice, look, I can always recognize you with perfect accuracy.

"I don't even know how he is doing. I don't know if he will blame me for telling the police that the orphanage is a human laboratory. I indirectly killed his grandparents. After that, he seems to be picked up by his parents. It's gone," she continued, her voice trailing off.

I really want to give her a hug, just like before, but, I can't, I can't be so selfish, I can't disturb her life.

"Joker." I lowered my eyes and responded to her. She read my name many times with a look of disappointment in her eyes.

"Okay, hello Joker, why did your legs become like this?" She asked me in an inquiring tone.

I stare at the mechanical leg I've been transformed into, "...sorry, can't tell you."

"It's okay. I took the liberty." She smiled and shook her head, "You have been in a coma for ten days now, should your family be worried?" She then asked.

family?Ah?The murderer?

The madman who nearly killed me?Is he worthy of my family?

"Well, I'll go back now." After I finished speaking, I got out of bed immediately, but I have never used mechanical legs before, and I fell down after walking a few steps. Tracy gently helped me up, "This is slow Learn to walk slowly, can you stay here for a few more days?" Her eyes were full of worry, I nodded, but I had no choice but to agree, otherwise it would be a problem whether I could walk or not.

In the next few days, Tracy taught me how to walk with mechanical legs, and I gradually became familiar with mechanical legs, "You know, there was a woman before you who asked me to install eight robotic arms for her, just like a spider In that way, I was very surprised by her request at the time. She told me that she was a deformed performer in a circus, and what I hated the most in my life was the circus, but I had to pretend for her. Everyone needs money, right? What?" Her tone was full of sarcasm.

Yes, in this world, everyone needs money, can you exchange money for high moral character?In their mouths, the high moral character is not their hypocritical protective color. Who doesn't know that they are different from others. When you are about to starve to death, can your high moral character help you?No, everyone needs money, and everyone has the taste of copper coins.

After thanking her for taking care of me, I was ready to leave. She must come to see me off. I had no choice but to keep walking forward mechanically with her on my back.

I know she has been looking at my back all the time, "Juke, little madman." She suddenly called out these two names. My heart softens when I look back at her.

One more look and you'll sink.

I started to run, forgive my cowardice, I don't want to drag anyone, especially you, my Alice.

Ah. Why is my heart hurting so much? There are bursts of throbbing pain, which makes people completely collapse, as if being tied together by countless threads, tearing the heart full of holes.

I was desperately trying to find a place where I could trap myself and paint a prison.

I don't want to hurt anyone, and I don't want to be hurt by others, but why do they all hurt me?What am I doing wrong?Live in this world?Why does God give me hope every time I am about to die?Then use disappointment to break all my fantasies, how can I be heinous?Let God treat me like this?
Hahahaha, God?People who believe in God are fools. God is only a tool they conceived to strengthen their rights and create a tool to confine people's thinking. Isn't Jesus and the Son of God a lie?

I ran aimlessly, and when the night approached, I found that I ran into the small forest again.

I pursed my lips and looked at the lights in the cabin, the monster in my heart kept yelling for me to kill him!kill him!My downfall is entirely thanks to him!
Since you created me, why can't you treat me well?

Crows began to circle around me, chirping with delight.

Fall into darkness, there is no light for you, no need for redemption, and you will not be hurt by them again.

I saw through the window that father drank a lot of wine and fell asleep peacefully on the worn-out sofa, ah, how could he fall asleep?

He has blood all over his hands, won't he be condemned by his conscience?Oh, forgot, he has no conscience at all hahahaha.

I knew that there would be a bonfire at the entrance of this big wooden house, and because I was afraid that wild animals would approach, I walked towards the bonfire and threw those lit wooden branches through the window with a blank expression.

The fire started to spread all of a sudden, and it was huge. That person was already so drunk that he fell asleep, and he would never wake up. Ah, this time, he would never wake up again.

Hahahahahaha, Jack, you killed someone, and you are just like them, with blood on your hands.

I watched the fire consume the cabin and laughed, tears dripping on my hands.

"Why are you crying? Laugh, Jake, laugh, he's dead, shouldn't you be happy?!" I yelled, I'm a complete lunatic now hahahaha.

　It’s Your Majesty the Beauty: Next is the story of Jack’s going to the circus, and it’ll be over soon qwq, readers who have something in common with the little lunatic, I hope you can be treated with tenderness by the world qwq
　　
　
(End of this chapter)