Behavioral Psychology: Instantly Read the Secrets Behind Others' Small Actions

Chapter 5 Turning the enemy into a friend is an easy way to go, interpreting the opponent's micro-reactions and trying to figure out his mind

Opponents do not refer to those confronters with swords and swords on the battlefield, but those competitors hidden in life.Only with competition can we progress, and our opponents are the boosters that promote our progress.However, many people achieve their goals by harming the interests of their opponents.Therefore, turning our opponents into our friends can not only promote our progress, but also achieve a win-win situation.The so-called "know yourself and know the enemy, you will never be imperiled in a hundred battles", if you want to turn an enemy into a friend, you need to figure out the inner state of the other party through their behavior, and then find a corresponding method.

1.A squinting, silent opponent harbors intense jealousy

Q Jun: I have a very good friend, but also a very competitive opponent.We grew up together, but every time we talked about something, she always squinted her eyes and said nothing. I don't know what she was thinking.

Socialist: Squinting eyes and not saying a word shows that she has a strong jealousy. She is both your friend and your competitor.If you want to maintain the former friendship, then you have to eliminate their jealousy.

【Scene reconstruction】

Liu Yun and Zhao Jie grew up in the same small mountain village, and they were good friends when they were children.After going to school, they were classmates, and both of them had excellent academic performance, which was comparable, either Liu Yun No.1 or Zhao Jie No.1.Slowly, a strong competition developed between them.From elementary school to junior high school, and then to high school, they have been competing like this, not giving in to each other.After graduating from high school, they were all admitted to their ideal universities with almost the same scores.After graduation, they found relatively good jobs in the same city.In that era, although they competed fiercely, no matter who achieved good results, the other party would be happy.Therefore, after work, they are still good friends who talk about everything.

However, recently, Liu Yun found that Zhao Jie always squinted his eyes when talking to her, which made her puzzled.

This weekend, Liu Yun and Zhao Jie got together again.As soon as she saw Zhao Jie, Liu Yun gushed, "My boyfriend bought me another ring this week, and also gave me a romantic Valentine's Day."

When Zhao Jie heard her words, she didn't say anything, but squinted at Liu Yun.Before this, when Liu Yun said something to her, Zhao Jie would always go along with her, but this time Zhao Jie didn't say anything, just squinted and remained silent.This made Liu Yun feel very depressed.

At this moment, Liu Yun suddenly remembered a sentence in the book: "A person who squints and says nothing has a strong sense of jealousy." She remembered that during this period of time, whenever she talked about her boyfriend, she always off topic.It turned out that Zhao Jie's boyfriend was inferior to Liu Yun's boyfriend in every respect.Therefore, Zhao Jie was jealous.

Knowing this reason, Liu Yun seldom talked about her boyfriend's good points in front of Zhao Jie, and complained intentionally or unintentionally that her boyfriend always ignored her, or some of his boyfriend's shortcomings.Unexpectedly, when it came to these topics, Zhao Jie began to express his opinions eloquently.Not long after, they returned to the past, and they were still good friends who talked about everything.

Sometimes, when you achieve something, it's inevitable that your opponents will be jealous of you.How to eliminate jealousy from your opponent and make him your friend?

[expert answering doubts]

Qing Bao Guangzi wrote in "Wu Yao Zhi Tiger": "The woman looked back and squinted and said: 'Wine is not expensive, it is said that people should not drink in advance. Appeared.Squinting implies many different meanings. Sometimes it expresses rejection, contempt, confusion, contempt, etc.; sometimes it also expresses a strong interest in the other party; sometimes it shows that the other party has strong jealousy.

In the story, Zhao Jie squinted her eyes and said nothing, which shows that she has a strong jealousy.Liu Yun, who has a little understanding of behavioral psychology, noticed her gesture and understood the hidden meaning of this gesture: squinting her eyes and not saying a word indicates that the other party has strong jealousy.Therefore, through reasoning, she figured out that Zhao Jie was mainly jealous of herself.Yes, it's inevitable that your opponents will be jealous when you achieve something.Zhao Jie had never lost in her studies, but she was defeated in finding a boyfriend. Naturally, she was unbalanced, and it was reasonable to feel jealous.

In this case, if Liu Yun did not find the problem, then they are both friends and rivals, and they are likely to evolve into competitors who will do whatever it takes to win.In this way, it is very likely that there will be a situation where both sides suffer.Fortunately, Liu Yun discovered Zhao Jie's jealousy in time and eliminated her jealousy more effectively.

In fact, it is not difficult to eliminate the jealousy of the opponent, you only need to deliberately expose some shortcomings in the jealous side of the opponent.In this way, the other party can find a psychological balance.

[Extended reading]

When a person's inner state is different, the eyes will show different movements.Let's take a look together:

Eyes glaring and silent indicate strong dissatisfaction

When a person feels strong dissatisfaction in his heart, his eyes glare, his eyes widen, and his nose flutters.

Squinted eyes indicate jealousy
When a person is jealous and dissatisfied, his eyes squint and he doesn't speak.At this time, there will be more white eyes and less eyeballs. We often say "white eyes" is this kind of situation.

Eyes look down and say nothing, indicating a little dissatisfaction in the heart

When a person is a little bit dissatisfied in his heart, but has no intention of causing trouble, he will often look down, bow his head in silence, and show embarrassment.

Eyes looking up and not saying a word shows that the heart is extremely sad

When a person is extremely sad, he can't help but look to the sky, close his eyes and don't speak.This is a manifestation of extreme control over inner emotions.

2.Throwing the cigarette butts on the ground, stomping out the opponent with his feet refused to admit defeat

Mr. Q: The way one of my competitors extinguishes cigarettes is really unreasonable. He threw the cigarette butt on the ground and stepped on it vigorously, as if the cigarette butt had a grudge against him.

Socialist: The opponent who throws the cigarette butt on the ground and stomps it out with his foot refuses to admit defeat.Be low-key when dealing with such an opponent, and give him space to promote himself.

【Scene reconstruction】

Xiao Xiao and Deng Hao entered the company together.Xiao Xiao has a calm personality, thinks twice before acting, and always considers things holistically.Deng Hao's personality is more impatient, he does whatever he thinks of, and has a strong execution ability.The two of them have their own advantages, so they both won the attention of the general manager.

Perhaps because of this, slowly, the two of them formed a strong competitiveness and became competitors.When Xiao Xiao placed an order, within a few days, Deng Hao would also sign an order.When Deng Hao received the bonus this month, Xiao Xiao must receive it next month.Therefore, they are very friendly on the surface, but in fact they compete secretly.

Once, the company needed to plan a copy.Both Xiao Xiao and Deng Hao's writing skills are very good, so the general manager entrusted them with this task.When their copy was handed in, the general manager looked at it carefully and found that Xiao Xiao's copy was more comprehensive and more operable.So I decided to adopt Xiao Xiao's copywriting.After Xiao Xiao heard the news, he spread it in the office, and his colleagues were envious.

After Deng Hao heard the news, he immediately threw the cigarette butt in his mouth on the ground, and stomped hard a few times.Xiao Xiao was afraid that they would turn against each other and lose even the remaining superficial friendship, so he decided to talk to Deng Hao.

When he saw Deng Hao, he was stomping on the cigarette butt.Seeing Deng Hao's action, Xiao Xiao was puzzled, since the cigarette butt didn't provoke him, how could he vent his anger with the cigarette butt?It's unreasonable.At this moment, Xiao Xiao remembered that he had read a book on behavioral psychology.The book says: "Adversaries who throw cigarette butts on the ground and stamp them out with their feet will not admit defeat. They are very aggressive and like to be sarcastic and belittle others to gain satisfaction. The best way to deal with such people is to keep a low profile and give The space for him to speak freely."

Thinking of this, Xiao Xiao walked over, patted Deng Hao on the shoulder and said: "Actually, your copywriting is really good! If I knew it, we would write it after discussing it, and integrate your point of view with mine. I believe this copywriting is even better." But Deng Hao was still a little displeased.

Xiao Xiao knew Deng Hao's character. In his later work, he became very low-key and never showed off his achievements.And every time Deng Hao gets an order, he never forgets to show it off in the office, making everyone look at him with admiration.Surprisingly, Xiao Xiao and Deng Hao have become more friendly since then.

In the workplace, have you ever met the kind of person who refuses to admit defeat?What should we do in the face of such an opponent?
[expert answering doubts]

In the workplace, colleagues are likely to become competitors for salary and positions.In the workplace, it is not a bad thing to have a competitor, because a competitor can promote continuous improvement.However, aggressive opponents will not admit defeat in everything, and always like to satirize and demean others to obtain satisfaction and vent their dissatisfaction.

Opponents who refuse to admit defeat are too aggressive and are likely to do things that hurt you.How to keep yourself from getting hurt?First of all, it is necessary to identify whether the competitor is very aggressive.So how to identify it?This requires us to observe the way he extinguishes the cigarette butt. If you find that the opponent throws the cigarette butt on the ground and steps hard a few times.This kind of person is very aggressive.Just like Deng Hao in the story.

In the face of very aggressive opponents, we must be like Xiao Xiao, never confront them head-on, but keep a low profile and never show off our achievements.Only in this way can we successfully defeat our opponents and turn our enemies into friends.Otherwise, instead of head-on you will only hurt yourself.

[Extended reading]

People who smoke can be seen everywhere in life, but different people have different ways of killing cigarette butts.Don't ignore the details of a person putting out cigarette butts. This is an important basis for observing and understanding his inner state and temperament.

The person who suddenly puts out the cigarette is nervous
Generally speaking, smokers do not smoke when they are particularly nervous or fearful.They suddenly put out the cigarette, which meant that something unexpected had happened, and he was suddenly very nervous.

A person who breaks a cigarette butt into several pieces and blows it out is cautious

People who break cigarette butts into two pieces have a cheerful personality, are frank and friendly, and are easy to accept, but they are a little frivolous, their words are not counted, and their actions are not reliable.People who fold cigarette butts into more than three pieces before destroying them are cautious and nervous.

People who throw cigarette butts on the ground and stomp them out with their feet are aggressive
This type of person is very aggressive and will not admit defeat in everything.They are not confident, stable, and not good at improving their own cultivation and ability, but like to satirize and belittle others to gain satisfaction and vent their dissatisfaction.When interacting with such a person, one must keep a low profile and give him room to show off.

The person who knocks out the cigarette butt is gentle
Gently tap the cigarette butt until the burning part is scattered in the ashtray and extinguished.This kind of person is generally slow, cautious in handling things, gentle in dealing with others, and pays great attention to the speech and behavior of the other party.They think more comprehensively and have a certain leadership ability, but this kind of people are not good at expressing their opinions, they are not good at expressing themselves, they are indecisive and lack courage.

3.Opponents who read carefully are willing to sit down and talk with others
Q Jun: I have a rival who is very competitive. He likes to read carefully when he is studying. How can I turn the enemy into a friend?

Socialist: People who like to read carefully are willing to sit down and talk with others, and do what they like, and they can turn enemies into friends by sitting down and having a good talk with him.

【Scene reconstruction】

Liu Wenjie and Zhang Tao are a pair of fiercely competitive opponents, and they are their masters.Liu Wenjie is the marketing manager of Yumao Company, while Zhang Tao is the marketing manager of another company.The competition between these two companies is very fierce, and the competition between Liu Wenjie and Zhang Tao, who are both marketing managers, is naturally also fierce.

At a negotiation meeting, Liu Wenjie and Zhang Tao met unexpectedly.Before entering the venue, Liu Wenjie found that Zhang Tao was sitting by the coffee table, holding a book in his hand, reading it with great interest.He found that when Zhang Tao read a book, he not only read it word by word, but also marked his favorite places.Liu Wenjie, who knows a little about psychology, secretly admires him. Such a person is meticulous about his work!But at the same time, he was also very moved, why they are two competitors, if they can become friends, it will be a great blessing in life.Such people are very happy to make friends, and especially like to sit down and talk with people.

Who says competitors can't be friends?There was a voice in Liu Wenjie's heart that kept asking himself.So he boldly walked over to Zhang Tao and exchanged business cards with him, and Zhang Tao accepted the business card out of politeness, but had no intention of making friends.

After the meeting, Liu Wenjie took the initiative to approach Zhang Tao and invited him to drink coffee and chat.Although Zhang Tao was reluctant, but seeing that Liu Wenjie was so sincere, he couldn't bear to refuse.So, I went to a nearby coffee shop with Liu Wenjie.

Sitting in the coffee shop, Liu Wenjie and Zhang Tao started a family routine.Liu Wenjie started the discussion from Zhang Tao's habit of reading carefully, and slowly opened the door to Zhang Tao's words.In the process of chatting, they found that they had a very common language with each other.Over time, the two became friends who talked about everything.Because they are friends, when negotiating business, they are very considerate of each other and aim at win-win.

Competitors don't have to fight to the death, but they can also become friends and achieve a win-win goal.How to convert competitors into friends?How to achieve the goal of win-win?
[expert answering doubts]

To turn a competitor into a friend, in addition to eliminating the other party's hostility, it is also necessary to find out whether the other party is willing to make friends.For the kind of person who is unwilling to make friends, even if you are not a competitor with him, it is difficult for you to become friends.How can we find out whether the other party is willing to make friends?In fact, as long as you observe carefully, you can figure it out from the other party's reading habits.

Generally speaking, people who like to skim are more careless.Because they lack the patience to listen to each other, and they themselves are unwilling to tell others about the trivial matters of life, it is difficult to make close friends who are heart-to-heart.People who like to read carefully are happy to talk with others and make friends easily, while those who read books only look at the pictures and not the content are happy to make friends.As long as everyone is having fun together, they might as well be friends.

The reason why Liu Wenjie in the story was able to boldly go over to make friends with Zhang Tao was because he saw from Zhang Tao's habit of reading carefully that he was willing to make friends.Therefore, Liu Wenjie walked over confidently.From the other party's habit of reading carefully, Liu Wenjie also found that Zhang Tao prefers to talk with others when making friends.Grasping his preference, Liu Wenjie followed suit and discussed his habit of reading carefully.Sure enough, during the conversation, they established a deep friendship.At work, they also achieved a win-win goal.

[Extended reading]

Reading is a great way for a person to acquire knowledge, and many people have the habit of reading.We can also understand a person's inner world from how he reads a book.Let's take a look together:

skimmers are careless
Generally speaking, people who like to skim are only interested in getting some concepts, and don't pay much attention to details.Therefore, such people are generally more careless.It is difficult for them to make close friends, because they lack the patience to listen to others, and they don't like to tell others about life's trivialities.

Those who read carefully are willing to sit down and talk with others
Generally speaking, people who like to read carefully do things very carefully and have a certain degree of devotion to life.When working, they pay great attention to every link, but getting results is the most important thing for them.They will be very confused if they stop in the middle.The favorite social activity of this kind of people is to have a heart-to-heart talk with their confidantes, and they are happy to make friends.

People who read books only look at the pictures and not the content are happy to make friends

Those who only look at the pictures but not the content when reading books lack patience. No matter what they do, they just want to know the general situation and refuse to study in depth.They are happy to make friends. In their view, as long as we get along happily, we can be friends, but they don't bother to deeply understand each other's mentality or needs.

4.Man with arms akimbo challenged intentionally

Mr. Q: Today, when I was quarreling with a colleague, he suddenly stood up with his hands on his hips, as if he wanted to fight.In this case, how can I eliminate his hostility?
Socialist: A person with arms akimbo is deliberately challenging, in which case your silence is the best solution.Otherwise, conflicts may arise.

【Scene reconstruction】

Zhang Wei and Tian Lixing are both deputy sales managers of a trading company.Some time ago, due to the physical discomfort of the sales general manager, it was difficult to be qualified for the post of general manager.Therefore, the company decided to choose between Zhang Wei and Tian Lixing.Therefore, the company asked them to express their opinions on a certain issue to see whose opinion was more convincing.

Due to different opinions, the two started arguing when you said something and I said something.Even though the chairman intervened, both of them disagreed with each other, and the arguments became more intense.Competing and fighting, Tian Lixing suddenly stood up, with his hands on his hips, staring straight at Zhang Wei and cursing.

Zhang Wei has a little understanding of behavioral psychology. He knows that the gesture of hands on hips means that the opponent deliberately challenges and is very aggressive.He knew very well what the consequences would be if he continued to quarrel like this.So, he stopped talking and listened quietly to every word Tian Lixing said.No matter what he said, Zhang Wei showed an indifferent look.

Surprisingly, Tian Lixing saw that Zhang Wei didn't say a word, and it didn't make sense to write and act by himself.So, I also calmed down, and quietly put my hands down and put them in my trouser pockets.

A war filled with gunpowder smoke ended quietly like this.Afterwards, Tian Lixing, who had calmed down, felt deeply sorry for his behavior, and took the initiative to shake hands with Zhang Wei.

When you notice your opponent's hands on hips, what should you do to neutralize your opponent's hostility?

[expert answering doubts]

In life, we often see situations like this: a child is arguing with his parents with his hands on his hips, two quarrelsome people are arguing with their hands on their hips, etc.These people have a common posture: hands on hips.Anyone with a little understanding of behavioral psychology knows that this gesture expresses protest and aggression.

In the workplace, what should we do when our opponents put their hands on their hips?If we confront the tough with the head, it will only hurt both of us. This is the result none of us want to see. "Braking with stillness, overcoming rigidity with softness", when the other party is angry, we should calm down.Only in this way can we eliminate the hostility of the other party and handle this matter well.

Zhang Wei in the story used this method. When he saw his opponent with his hands on his hips, he realized the seriousness of the consequences.Therefore, in any case, he pretended to be indifferent.As a result, the opponent was defeated without a fight.

This method is worth learning from. In life, when we quarrel with others and see them making this gesture, then we should take a step back and stop quietly.However, the act of putting hands on hips has different meanings in different situations.Therefore, when we see a person's hands on hips, we should combine the specific situation and his previous body language for comprehensive evaluation.Only in this way can we make accurate judgments about the behavior of others.

[Extended reading]

Hands on hips express different meanings in different situations.Therefore, when we see a person with his hands on his hips, we should make a comprehensive measurement in combination with the specific situation and his previous body language.Only in this way can we make accurate judgments about the behavior of others.

Hands on hips, expressing opposition

The akimbo posture not only allows our body to occupy more space, but the protruding elbows can also act as a weapon to deter others, preventing others from approaching or passing through their territory.

Arms on hips, an attack

Putting hands on hips is a sign of self-confidence and psychological advantages.If the feet are slightly wider than the shoulders when the hands are on the hips, it will make the whole body of the person look swollen, which is often potentially offensive.Such a posture shows readiness for battle.

Hands on hips, the unique posture of successful people
The posture with hands on hips is also considered to be a unique posture for successful people.This is the posture favored by ambitious and persistent people who are striving towards their goals.If a woman adopts this posture, it will give people a feeling of domineering, tigress, and lion roaring in the east.

Hands on hips, with strong explosive power

Some people like to put their hands on their hips. Whether they stand up after sitting for a long time or talk to friends, they are used to putting their hands on their waists.Some people don't even forget to walk with their hips on their hips. They walk with their upper body forward and their hands on their hips like a sprinter.These guys are explosive in what they do.

5.The person who raises the little finger when holding the teacup is stingy

Mr. Q: I drank tea with a very competitive opponent today. I found that when he held the teacup, his little finger was raised up. Although this movement is very elegant, it always feels a little wrong.

Socialist: The person with the little finger up when holding a teacup looks elegant, but he is actually mean to his friends.When dealing with such an opponent, you might as well give him some small favors.

【Scene reconstruction】

Wang Yalan and Du Xiaoyue are both deputy sales directors of a technology company. They have a harmonious relationship on the surface, but secretly compete with each other.Because they all want to get promotion opportunities in the company and get better development.

Once, the company's sales manager was transferred to a branch.Therefore, the chairman decided to choose one of them to take over the position of sales manager.After hearing the news, Wang Yalan and Du Xiaoyue began to compete secretly.Wang Yalan has a kind of determination to never give up until she reaches her goal, while Du Xiaoyue is relatively weaker.This kind of secret rivalry made them both exhausted.Du Xiaoyue accidentally mentioned this to a friend of hers. The friend called her and said: "Why do you have to compete with your competitors like this? Both sides will suffer. What good is it for you? Competition should be a fair competition and a win-win situation should be sought. I think you should become friends with her and handle the relationship between colleagues well, maybe when the election comes, colleagues will vote for you more?"

Du Xiaoyue was awakened by her friend's words, and she also thought that the competition that hurt both sides was meaningless.If the other party wins the election, you should be happy for the other party.

In order to change this relationship, Du Xiaoyue decided to invite Wang Yalan to drink tea.While drinking tea, Wang Yalan put on a rebellious look, showing no intention of reconciliation.Du Xiaoyue watched Wang Yalan drinking tea calmly, she found that Wang Yalan would always raise her little finger when holding the teacup.While the movement looks elegant, it always feels wrong.With a little understanding of psychology, she suddenly remembered that this gesture meant that the other party was stingy.There is no doubt that a miserly person naturally loves petty gain.So, Du Xiaoyue took off the bracelet from her hand, put it on Wang Yalan's hand, and said with a smile: "This is a little wish from me, you must accept it."

Wang Yalan smiled happily.She immediately stretched out her hand and said, "Please take care of me at work in the future!" Later, they became very good friends.During the campaign, Wang Yalan knew that she was not as good as Du Xiaoyue, so she voted for Du Xiaoyue with her precious vote.

How to deal with your competitors well?The key is to grasp the character traits of the other party and find their weakness in human nature.In this way, your competitors can become your friends.

[expert answering doubts]

Sometimes, we want to shake hands with our opponents to make peace, but the opponent may not extend a hand to make peace.What do we do in this situation?Do you continue to fight with each other, or do you think of another way?

Du Xiaoyue in the story solved this question for us.When her opponent Wang Yalan was unwilling to shake hands and make peace, she did not give up her efforts, but paid attention to her behavior and behavior, trying to find clues from the opponent's body movements.Sure enough, she discovered Wang Yalan's stingy character from the action of Wang Yalan raising her little finger while serving tea.People who are miserly are generally greedy for petty gains.Therefore, Du Xiaoyue quickly thought of a countermeasure - to treat petty and cheap people with gifts.Sure enough, when she gave Wang Yalan her own bracelet, Wang Yalan immediately smiled.This is how their friendship was established.If Du Xiaoyue didn't discover her stingy character, then they could only break up unhappy and continue to fight secretly.

Different postures of holding a teacup reveal different inner activities.As long as you carefully observe his posture of holding a teacup, you will find that even such a simple movement has subtle differences.When drinking tea with your opponent, you may wish to observe his posture of holding the teacup, so as to interpret the inner activities of the opponent.

The above story tells us a truth: To shake hands and make peace with an opponent, we must first understand the behavior of the opponent, and then figure out the psychological activities of the opponent.Then, prescribe the right medicine.In this way, it is very easy to establish a good relationship with the opponent.

[Extended reading]

If you look closely at the way people hold teacups, there are subtle differences in even the simple act of holding a cup.There are various postures for holding a cup and drinking tea. Through the posture of holding a teacup, we can see people's various mentalities and personalities.

Those who hold the teacup and hold the ear tightly have a stronger sense of self-assertion

Generally speaking, those who hold the teacup and hold the ear of the cup tightly have a strong sense of self-assertion, they like to be noticed, and they are a person who does his own way.

The person who raises the little finger when holding the teacup is stingy
Those who raise their little fingers when serving tea are very elegant. This kind of person is a self-centered person. They are more neurotic.

The person who supports the cup with the little finger and the thumb when holding the teacup loves to fantasize

People who support the cup with their little fingers and thumbs when holding a teacup are fond of fantasy and quite artistic.However, they are often suspected by others because of their own way, unconstrained style, and ignoring the opinions of those around them.

The person who seems to be grabbing something casually when holding a teacup is lively
People who seem to be grabbing things casually when holding a teacup are lively, and because of their lively personality, they are also well-rounded people.However, they can give people a "frivolous" feeling.

chapter summary:

1.squinting silent person

Squinting eyes and not saying a word shows that he has a strong jealousy, and the other party will slowly become your competitor driven by jealousy.If you want to turn your competitors into friends, you must first eliminate the jealousy of your opponents.It is not difficult to eliminate the jealousy of the opponent, you only need to deliberately expose your shortcomings, especially the jealousy of the opponent.

2.Man throwing cigarette butt on the ground and stamping it out with foot

The opponent who threw the cigarette butt on the ground and stomped it out with his foot refused to admit defeat.When dealing with such an opponent, you must keep a low profile and give him space to promote himself.

3.people who like to read

People who like to read carefully are happy to sit down and talk with others.If you want to turn this kind of competitor into a friend, then you need to do what you like, sit down and have a heart-to-heart talk with him.During the conversation, you become friends.

4.man with arms akimbo

Generally speaking, people with their hands on their hips are deliberately challenging.Facing such an opponent, if we meet head-on, it will only hurt us both.In fact, braking with stillness and eliminating the other party's anger with silence is the best solution.

5.The person who raises the little finger when holding a teacup

The person with the little finger up when holding the teacup looks elegant, but in fact he is mean to his friends.To associate with such a person, you might as well give him some small favors.

(End of this chapter)