Behavioral Psychology: Instantly Read the Secrets Behind Others' Small Actions
Chapter 7 Everyone sees love is not a dream, interpret colleagues micro-reactions to understand thei
Chapter 7 Everyone sees love is not a dream, interpret colleagues micro-reactions to understand their emotions
As long as you are at work, you will have colleagues.However, colleagues come from all over the world. Among them, there are people who have the same temperament as you, and some who have different personalities from you, and there are even people who you particularly hate.In the face of colleagues with different personality types, how to get along with them and how to make them your best partner?Only by trying to figure out his temperament and emotions through his actions, can he find the correct way to get along with him and create a good working atmosphere.
1.A nonchalant expression indicates a strong inner dissatisfaction
Q Jun: Today, when I talked about something with my colleague, I thought he would be sad, but he showed a nonchalant expression, does he really not care?
Professionals in the workplace: You have to pay attention to this. Showing a nonchalant expression is not really not caring, on the contrary, it shows a strong inner dissatisfaction.
【Scene reconstruction】
Li Ying is a very smart girl, she is amiable and well behaved, no matter what problems she encounters, she can deal with them skillfully.Therefore, it is deeply loved by colleagues.
Once, she and her colleague Xiao Zhang went to meet a very important client.The colleague Xiao Zhang accidentally said the wrong thing and offended the client, which caused a lot of losses to the company.Li Ying was very angry and severely criticized her colleague Xiao Zhang.
She's always been amiable, and this is the first time she's ever accused someone so harshly.Because she was too emotional at the time, she said a lot of nasty things.In addition, she was in a fit of anger, so she only focused on venting her anger, but for a moment she forgot to pay attention to her colleague Xiao Zhang's expression.After she calmed down slowly, she realized that what she said was a bit serious.So I hurried to find Xiao Zhang.She thought that Xiao Zhang was also complaining about herself at this time, and she was very angry.Unexpectedly, when she saw Xiao Zhang, she found that Xiao Zhang had no expression on his face.
Seeing Xiao Zhang's indifferent expression, Li Ying felt even more uneasy.She knew that the seemingly indifferent expression on Xiao Zhang's face was actually an expression of strong dissatisfaction in his heart.If she couldn't get rid of her dissatisfaction in time, she might explode soon, and by then, the relationship between colleagues would become embarrassing.
After understanding Xiao Zhang's expression, Li Ying quickly changed her attitude, changed the harsh and ugly language just now, and immediately said in a gentle tone: "I'm sorry, I was too reckless just now, and I said a lot of ugly things, I hope Don't mind. In fact, I know you didn't mean it. If you have any dissatisfaction in your heart, just say it! Say it, and you will feel better. "
Hearing what she said, Xiao Zhang began to state his reasons eloquently, and the expression on his face gradually eased a lot as he "vented".After Xiao Zhang's expression returned to normal, Li Ying estimated that Xiao Zhang's anger had almost been released.So I made a timely summary of this work error.A possible crisis among colleagues was resolved in this way.
Is the expression of indifference really indifference?In the workplace, have you understood the real meaning behind the expression of indifference?
[expert answering doubts]
There is a saying: "The expression on the face is the clouds in the sky." This sentence is quite reasonable, because the expression is indeed a barometer of the heart most of the time, reflecting a person's true inner thoughts.As long as we observe carefully, we can see a person's happiness and happiness from his smile, his anger and dissatisfaction from his scowling face, and his sadness from his sad face. and sad...
However, we can make judgments about the obvious emotions displayed by a person, but we cannot understand the expressions on the face where there is no symbol.Just like Xiao Zhang in the story, showing a nonchalant expression.If Li Ying did not understand the hidden meaning behind Xiao Zhang's indifferent expression, then she would not be able to eliminate Xiao Zhang's dissatisfaction in time.After Xiao Zhang's emotions broke out, the friendly relationship among colleagues was about to break down.
In fact, anyone who understands psychology knows that a nonchalant expression is actually an expression of strong inner dissatisfaction.Therefore, we should not only pay attention to those expressionless expressions, but also learn to interpret the real emotions behind them, so as not to let ourselves be deceived by such potential expressions.
[Extended reading]
The expression of indifference on his face does not mean that he really doesn't care, but a manifestation of strong dissatisfaction in his heart.If a certain person is found to be expressionless about something or someone, then we should pay special attention to his movements.This expression may hide two meanings:
expressed strong dissatisfaction
If a person's anger reaches a certain limit, his face will not show a scowl, but a blank expression.This is a critical point, if it is allowed to continue, the next moment will be the moment when he explodes.
extreme disregard
At some point, deadpan is also a sign of disregard.If a person is extremely ignorant of someone or something, his face will be expressionless.Because he doesn't pay attention to the people or things in front of him at all, completely treating them as if they don't exist.So it doesn't show any expression for things that don't exist.
2.Wandering eyes indicate restlessness
Q Jun: Recently, when I was talking to a colleague, I found that his eyes are always wandering, why is that?
Professional in the workplace: The erratic gaze shows that he is restless at the moment, and he may be hiding something from you, so be careful!
【Scene reconstruction】
Xiaoyun joined the company on the same day as Xiaoli and became a member of the sales department.There is not much difference in age between them, and they get along very well, and they encourage and help each other at work.Over time, the two of them became good friends who talked about everything, and they were really like sisters.
However, one day after get off work, the two of them agreed to eat KFC together, and this time it was Xiaoyun's treat.After buying the hamburger, they sat down face to face, chatting while eating the hamburger.They talked about the work situation of the day, the gossip news of the company, the handsome and sunny new colleagues, and how rude the boss was.When talking about her boss, Xiaoli didn't say a word, she ate a hamburger, but her eyes looked east and west, looking absent-minded.
Xiaoyun soon realized that Xiaoli's mood was not right, so he deliberately broke her head and made her face him.However, what Xiaoyun didn't expect was that Xiaoli glanced at herself, and then immediately shifted her attention, as if she didn't dare to face herself.
Xiaoyun didn't say anything else, she remembered a book that said, if a person's eyes are always wandering when talking to her, and she dare not look at herself, then she must have an unknown secret in her heart, and she is afraid of what others will see. The clues come.Thinking of this, Xiaoyun looked at Xiaoli again, and found that she met his gaze, and then involuntarily moved his gaze down.Although Xiaoyun didn't believe what was said in the book, she felt that Xiaoli must have something to hide from herself.But what is it?
After some thought, Xiaoyun asked frankly: "What's wrong with you today, why do you always look evasively, is there something you are hiding from me?"
When Xiaoli heard this, a very painful expression appeared on her face.After a while, she took a deep breath and said, "That day, the manager asked us about our visit to a client. I accidentally told you about the discount you gave to a client. After I finished speaking, I realized the seriousness of the matter. Sex. I'm afraid the manager will call you out. So, I'm afraid to confront you."
Xiaoyun suddenly remembered that when Xiaoli and Xiaoli went to talk about a client, the client insisted on a discount, but he couldn't hold back, so he agreed to the client's request.Unexpectedly, the manager found out about this incident.However, what Xiaoli didn't expect was that instead of being angry, Xiaoyun patted herself on the shoulder and said, "It's okay, just be careful next time. We are still good sisters who talk about everything."
When my best colleagues look at me, their eyes are always erratic, and they dare not look at me squarely. Why is this?
[expert answering doubts]
Sight is the refracted light of a person's psychology, and it can reflect the desire and emotion deep in a person's heart.How to discover his mental state at this time from the sight of others?In fact, it is very simple. When talking with others, you only need to pay a little attention to find where the other party's line of sight falls, and from where the other party's line of sight rests, you can find out what kind of state he is in at the moment.
If he looks into the distance and shows a dull expression, it means that he is in a low mood and has no intention of listening to you at all. The reason why he still sits in front of you and listens to you is just because he doesn't want to distract you. It's just for fun.If when you look at him squarely, but he deliberately avoids your sight, then you have to pay attention, because most people who dare not look at you squarely have ghosts in their hearts.Anyone who understands psychology knows that when a person has something in his mind, as long as he looks at you squarely, he will feel inexplicably nervous.If you are looking at him squarely, but his eyes are wandering, looking at you, and then immediately shifting his attention, you also need to pay attention.Because the wandering gaze is a manifestation of inconsistency, which shows that he is restless at this time, and he may have said something insincere, and he is afraid that you will see something.If you explore carefully, you may discover unexpected secrets!
In the story, Xiaoli feels sorry for her friend Xiaoyun because she said something wrong, so when she looks at Xiaoyun, her eyes are always erratic, and she dare not look at her directly.After careful observation, Xiaoyun saw the clues, and speculated that Xiaoli must have something to hide from him.Sure enough, as she expected, after some conversations, she figured out the reason why Xiao Li dared not face herself.Therefore, the misunderstanding was eliminated in time and the friendship was saved.
The above story tells us a truth: When talking with colleagues, we should not only carefully ponder the meaning behind other people's words, but also pay more attention to the other person's line of sight, and try to find breakthroughs from the other side's line of sight.
[Extended reading]
Upward gaze indicates self-confidence
When a person speaks, his eyes are always slightly upward, which shows that he is full of confidence in his status and ability.Most of this line of sight belongs to leaders or workers who control others, and it is most prominent among politicians.
Downward gaze indicates cowardice
When you are talking with the other party and find that the other party quietly lowers his eyes, you should figure out that he is in a state of timidity and is very nervous.This is because he has realized that you are his formidable opponent, or there is a big gap between you in age and social status.
direct eye contact is a sign of hostility
When you are talking to someone, looking directly at you indicates that he is suffering from some kind of powerful blow, or harboring a strong hostility.
Eyes pointing far away indicates absent-mindedness
When you are talking to the other person, the other person always looks away, which shows that he is absent-minded at the moment.It's likely that she doesn't like you, or isn't interested in what you have to say.Generally speaking, when you talk to someone, if the other person doesn't look you in the eye, or looks indifferently, it means that he is not interested in you or has no sense of intimacy.
An erratic gaze indicates restlessness
When you talk to the other party, the other party's eyes are always erratic and evasive, which shows that he is restless at the moment and is afraid that you will see something.
The opposite sex suddenly avoids your sight to show that he cares about you
Sometimes, the gaze of someone of the opposite sex causes you to feel a searing sensation.However, when your eyes meet, the other party moves away deliberately, which shows that the other party cares about you very much, and even has a tendency to have a crush on you.
3.Swollen nose indicates fear
Mr. Q: Today, when I saw my female colleague Xie Ying come out of the manager's office, her nose became abnormally swollen.I don't know why she acted like this?
Career expert: A swollen nose indicates fear in her heart, and the manager must have said or done something that frightened her.It's better for you to stay away from her, otherwise she will vent her anger on you.
【Scene reconstruction】
One day, when Sun Ping got off work, he saw his female colleague Xie Ying coming out of the manager's office with a dejected expression on her face.He took a closer look and found that her brows were tightly furrowed, her nostrils were swollen, and her nostrils were fluttering, she was in extreme fear.
Out of kindness, Sun Ping wanted to say hello to her and ask her what was wrong, but he didn't seem to see him.So, Sun Ping stretched out his hand and patted him on the shoulder from behind. Unexpectedly, Xie Ying, a female colleague, turned around and suddenly became furious: "What do you want to do? Stay away from me!" When Xie Ying said this, her nostrils It became very swollen and stared at him wide-eyed.
Sun Ping froze in place for a while, and didn't come back to his senses for a long time.He never thought that Xie Ying, who was always gentle and lovely, would be so furious.After a while, he managed to squeeze out a few words: "I see you are in a bad mood, I just want to say hello to you. I have no other meaning."
Xie Ying took a deep breath and burst into tears.Sun Ping asked at a loss: "What's wrong with you, what happened?"
After a while, Xie Ying said, "I'm going to resign!"
Sun Ping seemed to understand at once. He used to hear from his colleagues that the manager behaved badly and harassed female colleagues from time to time.He didn't believe it before, but now he does.At the same time, he regretted his reckless behavior just now.In fact, from her swollen nostrils, it should be seen that Xie Ying is in fear at this time, and reaching out to pat her on the shoulder only intensified her inner fear.No wonder she would be furious with herself.If you called her loudly, maybe she wouldn't make such an unknown fire.
Have you ever encountered this kind of situation in getting along with your colleagues, you stretched out your hand to pat the other person's shoulder, and greeted her with good intentions, but caused the other party to get angry for no reason?
[expert answering doubts]
The nose is in the center of our face. Although there are very few expressions, because it is located in the center of the entire face, it also plays a role of "connecting the past and the next".From a medical point of view, the nose is one of the channels for breathing.Whether a person's inner emotions are stable or not will cause changes in breathing, and changes in breathing will affect the shape and color of the nose.
Generally speaking, in mutual communication, a person's mental activities are often revealed from the changes in the nose.For example, a wrinkled nose usually expresses disgust for a thing; when it is contemptuous, it "sneers"; when it is angry, the nostrils are swollen and the wings of the nose flap... It can be seen that the nose also has its own rich "language". See through the other person's psychology through subtle changes in the other person's nose.
Although Sun Ping in the story noticed the subtle changes in the nose of his female colleague Xie Ying, and knew from her swollen nostrils that she was in fear, he was too careless to figure out why Xie Ying was so frightened, let alone think about it. My own actions will aggravate the inner fear of female colleague Xie Ying.If he had thought of this earlier, he wouldn't have provoked an unknown fire.
Therefore, in communicating with colleagues, we must learn to gain insight into their mental activities by observing their noses.
[Extended reading]
Although the expression of the nose is rare, a person's psychological activities are often shown from the changes of the nose.Therefore, in communicating with colleagues, you might as well gain insight into their mental activities by observing their noses.
Nose discoloration indicates flinching
The color of the nose does not change often, but if the nose is completely white, it shows that the other party must be cowering.If it is a counterparty, or a non-interested counterparty, it doesn't matter, it is mostly caused by his hesitation and hesitation.For example: the state when one does not know whether conditions should be raised during a transaction, or when one is hesitant to make a condition.
Swollen nose indicates fear
Usually, a person's nose is swollen to express anger or fear, because in a state of tension, breathing and heartbeat will speed up, so the phenomenon of nostril enlargement will occur.However, the nostrils also swell with excitement.Thus, the expression "very short of breath" signifies a state of elation or excitement.
As for the enlargement of the other party's nose, is it because of elation and pride, or because of suppressing dissatisfaction and anger?This will be judged from the other reactions of the interviewee.
Sweaty nose is a sign of restlessness
Sometimes this is just the other party's personal problem, but for people who don't have such problems on weekdays, once beads of sweat emerge from their noses, it should be said that the other party's heart is anxious or nervous.If the other party is an important counterparty, he must be eager to reach an agreement, and he must complete the emotional expression of the transaction anyway, because he is afraid that if the transaction fails, he will lose the opportunity or incur great disadvantages, so he will feel anxious and nervous. , and fell into a state of self-imposed restraint.Because of tension, the nose is sweaty.
4.Drooping eyes indicate contempt for the other
Q Jun: I am a new employee who has just joined the company. When I talk to a colleague, I find that his eyes are always drooping.Why is he behaving like this?
Career expert: When talking to the other party, his eyes always droop, which means he looks down on you.As a new employee, you have to work hard to make a performance to impress him.
【Scene reconstruction】
Wu Xiaoli is a new employee in the sales department. She is outgoing, lively and lovely.As soon as you arrive at the company, when you see your colleagues, you greet them with a smile, and most of your colleagues smile back.
However, a colleague who was seated closest to her didn't respond to her smile.Since the seats are very close to each other, Wu Xiaoli took the initiative to chat with this colleague during the lunch break.
"Hi! My name is Wu Xiaoli, and I'm a new colleague." Wu Xiaoli introduced herself to her with a smile.
"Hello!" The colleague said indifferently.
Wu Xiaoli was very puzzled. When the colleague said "Hello", he didn't look at her directly, but his eyes drooped, as if he was looking at something below.
"How long have you been in the company?" Wu Xiaoli still asked softly.
"Five years!" When the colleague said this, his tone was full of arrogance.
"Oh!" Seeing his lukewarm attitude towards her, Wu Xiaoli stopped in time.
Sitting next to the computer, Wu Xiaoli was very depressed.I wanted to learn some experience from my old colleagues, but I didn't expect to get caught in the dust.At this time, she suddenly remembered the doubts that had arisen in her heart just now.So, I checked it on Baidu.Check it out and the answer will come out.It turned out that her drooping eyes were contemptuous and looked down on the other party.At that time, Wu Xiaoli secretly made up her mind: I must work hard to make achievements, and when I make achievements, will you still look down on me?
Huangtian paid off. With Wu Xiaoli's hard work, after two months, she signed three contracts.This made the colleagues look at her with admiration, and the colleague who had looked down on her before also gave her a thumbs up with a smile.
Just walked into a new company, everything here is new to you.Do you also feel perplexed when you try to talk to a co-worker but his eyes keep drooping?
[expert answering doubts]
Confucius said: "Look at his eyes, how thin a person is!" The meaning of this sentence is: If you want to observe a person, you must observe his eyes.Because a person's eyes directly express his inner thoughts, desires and emotions.
Emerson once said this sentence: "The eyes of a person speak as much as the tongue. They don't need a dictionary, but they can understand the whole world from the language of the eyes." Our skylight is spreading all kinds of information of the inner world to the outside world all the time.
When Wu Xiaoli in the story was talking to her colleagues, she found that her eyes always drooped.She didn't know the hidden meaning of the drooping eyes.In order to understand the doubts in Kaixin, she searched Baidu and finally found the answer.Knowing that this colleague despises her, although she is angry, she knows how to live up to it.Through unremitting efforts, she finally impressed that colleague.Eliminating the contempt of the other party, getting along with her is naturally not a problem.If Wu Xiaoli hadn't figured out the meaning of drooping eyes at that time, then that colleague might have been looking at her with this look.
From the above story, if you want to know a person's inner thoughts, then observe his eyes and get the answer from his eyes.
[Extended reading]
Eyes are the windows of a person's soul, and a person's thoughts are usually revealed through the eyes.If you want to observe a person, you must start by observing his eyes.
eyes up
The eyes are raised, and the upper lashes are pushed up so strongly that they almost coincide with the drooping eyebrows, creating a haunting expression that conveys something of horror.
eyes blink
The series of blinking actions include continuous blinking, super blinking, eyelash vibration and so on.Blinking occurs when you are about to cry, and represents an extremely suppressed mood.
eyes hanging up
This kind of person hides ulterior secrets in their hearts, and likes to consciously exaggerate the facts. They have a negative personality and dare not face each other squarely.
drooping eyes
This action has the meaning of contempt for the other party, or simply does not care about the other party's situation.The sender of this kind of action is generally calm in personality, only thinks of himself in essence, and is a willful person.
5.The teardrops overflowing from the eyes are also a sign of happiness
Mr. Q: Today is Valentine's Day. During the lunch break, the eyes of female colleague Bai Shan suddenly overflowed with crystal clear tears.I thought she broke up with her boyfriend, so I went to comfort her.Unexpectedly, she laughed out loud.
Professional in the workplace: People not only shed tears when they are in pain and sadness, but also when they are happy and moved.Bai Shan's tears were probably moved by her boyfriend, not because she was sad!
【Scene reconstruction】
The annual Valentine's Day is coming, and romance and excitement permeate the office.When we met each other in the morning, we all smiled and wished each other Happy Valentine's Day.
Liu Mushroom is a very beautiful and lovely girl, and her colleagues like her very much.This day was originally a happy, happy day.However, after get off work in the afternoon, other colleagues left one after another, but she lay on her desk and cried.
Shang Zhiqiang is the main person in charge of the company's administration. When he saw Liugu crying, he was a little confused, so he thought that she was broken in love, and her boyfriend chose to break up on this special day.So he came to her and asked, "Why are you crying?"
Liu Mushroom looked up and found that it was Shang Zhiqiang.She hastily wiped away her tears, smiled and said in a crying tone: "I'm fine! It's fine."
Shang Zhiqiang touched the back of his head and asked in confusion: "It's nothing, why are you still crying? Why didn't you go on a date today? Did you break up with your boyfriend?"
Shang Zhiqiang’s series of questions made Liu Gu dumbfounded. Knowing that he had misunderstood himself, Liu Gu smiled and said, “On this special day today, it’s too late for me to be happy? Why are you crying?”
"I clearly saw tears in your eyes." Shang Zhiqiang asked reluctantly.
Liu Mushroom touched the corners of his eyes, and found that there were still traces of tears in the corners of his eyes.She said with some embarrassment: "I am happy tears, not sad tears!"
Shang Zhiqiang turned around and said to himself: "I only know that a person will shed tears when he is sad, but I don't know that he will also shed tears when he is happy?"
Liu Mushroom covered his mouth and smiled secretly.It turned out that her boyfriend said on QQ that he was going to give him a surprise tonight.He not only prepared roses and chocolates for her, but also prepared a beautiful ring.No wonder she shed tears of joy.
In the workplace, have you ever misunderstood a colleague in this way? He was crying because he was so happy, but you thought he was crying because of something sad?
[expert answering doubts]
Most of us know that when a person is sad, they cry.However, what many people don't understand is that when a person is happy and excited, he will also make tears flow.Just like Shang Zhiqiang in the story, he didn't understand why Liugu was crying.
Why do you cry when you are happy?This is because the autonomic nervous system in the human body is a set of nervous systems that are in charge of internal organs, gland secretion, and heart beating.In this system, there are two types of nerves with different functions - sympathetic and parasympathetic.These two different nerves cooperate with each other to manage many physiological activities in the human body.Tears are the secretions of the lacrimal glands in the eye sockets, which are part of the joint management of the sympathetic and parasympathetic nerves.When people are happy and excited, the sympathetic nerves are excited, which will make people shed tears, but the amount is very small.
If Shang Zhiqiang in the story knew the reason why people cry when they are happy and excited, maybe he would not misunderstand his colleague Liu Mushroom.To get along well with colleagues, in addition to caring about each other, you also need to understand each other's body language. Don't be like Shang Zhiqiang in the story, misinterpreting each other's happiness as sadness and making a joke.However, this is not just a joke, but also tells us how important it is to understand the secrets hidden behind other people's micro-reactions.
[Extended reading]
People cry when they are sad, they cry when they are happy and excited, and they cry when they are afraid... Let's take a look at how to understand the meaning of tears:
Crying to get rid of emotions when sad
Generally speaking, crying is a manifestation of sadness.Because there is a certain limit to a person's ability to bear, once this limit is exceeded, the mind will not be able to bear it.Crying is often an external expression of extreme pain in the human heart, and it is the "killer weapon" for self-protection. When a person falls into a state of terrible worry and despair, he neither wants to eat nor sleep.At this time, finding a way to make him cry can relieve his pain.
According to some scholars, when a person is crying, the pituitary gland will release endorphins, which will excrete a lot of tears, and tears contain harmful chemicals that can cause pain.People expel their tears by crying, which is to dispel bad emotions.Therefore, people will feel much more relaxed.
cry when happy
Tears are the secretions of the lacrimal glands in the eye sockets, which are part of the joint management of the sympathetic and parasympathetic nerves.When people are happy and excited, the sympathetic nerves are excited, which will make people shed tears, but the amount is very small.
6.People drawing circle while talking on the phone feel lonely
Q Jun: I have a colleague who always draws circles while making a phone call. Isn’t she worried that her doing so will affect her work?
Career expert: The person who draws a circle while making a phone call is lonely in her heart. She usually does not affect her work, but she doesn't care about other people's affairs, and her attitude is very indifferent.If you ask her for help with anything, you're in the wrong person.
【Scene reconstruction】
Du Juan is an operator of a company, and she has to deal with different people by phone every day.Due to the need to frequently record the names, phone numbers and addresses of customers, she always has a lot of paper and several pens on her desk for emergencies.
When she first started working, Du Juan did a great job and made a lot of contributions to the company.But, slowly, as time relentlessly devoured her work, she grew weary of the job.Due to being unable to communicate with others all year round, her inner loneliness is increasing day by day.In addition, during this period of time, the company often required to work overtime, and even the time for dating her boyfriend was compressed, which exacerbated her inner loneliness.Therefore, suffering from loneliness, she did not know when she fell in love with doodles on paper while answering the phone, and especially liked to draw circles on paper without stopping.
One day after get off work, a client called, and she started drawing on paper unconsciously again.At this time, her colleague Xiao Dynasty came over to her.It turned out that during lunch, Xiao Wang asked her to help him contact a very important client.Du Juan agreed immediately.
Xiao Wang stood next to Du Juan. After standing for about 2 minutes, Du Juan found out.She pointed to the phone in her hand apologetically, meaning to ask him to wait a while.
About 5 minutes later, Du Juan finished answering the phone.Xiao Wang was about to ask something, but Du Juan put down her pen and asked, "What's the matter, Xiao Wang?"
Xiao Wang was taken aback, but quickly said calmly: "Sister Juanzi, you are so noble and forgetful! What you promised me at noon..."
Du Juan blinked her eyes, and asked blankly, "What's the matter?"
"Just please help me contact a client!"
"Oh. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I will definitely ask for you tomorrow." Du Juan said embarrassingly, forgetting about this matter.
In the workplace, have you ever met such a colleague who promised to help you but forgot?
[expert answering doubts]
Experts from the Institute of Psychology in Bonn, Germany, have come to a conclusion by observing the redundant actions people make when they make a phone call: more than 60% of people like to scribble on small pieces of paper when they make a phone call.In response to this phenomenon, some psychologists tested these "painters" and found that their "paintings" basically faithfully reflected the personality habits of the "painters".This kind of graffiti essentially reflects some subconscious characteristics of a person.When a person is on the phone while unconsciously scribbling on paper, the information in his subconscious mind will involuntarily vent.
In the story, Du Juan draws circles while making a phone call, showing her subconscious loneliness.Because of her inner loneliness, she thinks about herself most of the time, so she seldom pays attention to other people's feelings. Naturally, she is indifferent to other people's affairs, and always feels that those things are simply a kind of interference to herself.Therefore, she will focus all her energy on herself.When her colleague Xiao Wang asked about it, she still looked blank, making Xiao Wang dumbfounded.
As the saying goes: "I will blame others and blame myself." When Xiao Wang blamed Du Juan for not taking his own affairs to heart, he should blame himself for finding the wrong person.If he had noticed Du Juan's habit and correctly interpreted the secret behind the habit, then he would not have entrusted Du Juan with such an important matter.
From the above story, we draw a conclusion: When getting along with colleagues, if you need to ask your colleagues to do something very important, then don't find someone who likes to make circles while making calls.Only by finding the right person can things be done.If you want to find the right person, you must first learn to recognize people, and to recognize others requires you to understand the secrets behind the other person's micro-reactions.
[Extended reading]
People drawing circle while talking on the phone feel lonely
A person who likes to draw circles on the phone is lonely in his heart.This type of person only pays attention to their own feelings, and doesn't care about other people's affairs at all, and even has a somewhat indifferent attitude, always feeling that those things are a kind of interference to themselves.Because at this time, he had already concentrated all his energy on himself.
People who draw flowers or the sun while talking on the phone are fragile
If a person likes to draw the sun or flowers while talking on the phone, it shows that his heart is extremely fragile.This type of person gives people a feeling of happiness on the surface, but in reality it is the opposite, and they are very eager for the care and comfort of others.Therefore, I couldn't help expressing this enthusiasm on paper.
The person who draws a grid while talking on the phone is in an embarrassing period
If a person likes to draw grids all over the paper while talking on the phone, it means that he is now in an unseemly or embarrassing situation, and feels more or less unconfident.
Man crossing himself while talking on the phone is distressed
If a person likes to make the cross while talking on the phone, it means that he has a sense of fault and is feeling distressed or remorseful at this time.
People who draw small people while talking on the phone feel helpless
If a person likes to draw a very simple villain while talking on the phone, it shows that he is helpless at the moment, or is deliberately avoiding some kind of responsibility.When he needs to firmly deny but can't speak, he will draw this kind of villain.
7.Constantly scratching the earlobe and the back of the ear indicates inner anxiety
Q Jun: When I went to work today, I found a colleague who kept scratching the earlobe and the back of the ear.I don't know what happened to him?
Professionals in the workplace: Scratching the earlobe and the back of the ear continuously shows that the person is anxious. You should go over and ask the other person actively, and take the initiative to help him, so that the other person can get through the anxiety dilemma smoothly.In this way, the distance between you and the other party will be greatly reduced.
【Scene reconstruction】
Wang Bo is a very careful person, not only for his work, but also for others.In the office, he can always observe the movement changes of people around him and interpret the meaning, and then take the initiative to help others, which has won the unanimous approval of his colleagues.
One day, after work, Wang Bo inadvertently looked up at his surroundings.Soon, he found that his new colleague Li Lu was staring at the computer with his back behind his back, scratching the back of his ear with one hand.
The movement of Li Lu scratching the back of her ear caught Wang Bo's attention. Judging from his experience, Li Lu was feeling anxious about something at the moment.So, he quietly came to Li Lu and asked, "Do you need help now?"
When Li Lu heard it, she was surprised and said, "Well, I'm not familiar with computers enough. I don't know why Word can't be opened. I haven't gotten it right since I went to work."
Wang Bo saw that it was a very common problem, so he helped Li Lu solve the problem without saying anything.Li Lu quickly said thank you.
Wang Bo smiled and said, "You're welcome." Li Lu wanted to say something more, but Wang Bo turned and left.After get off work, Li Lu approached Wang Bo and asked her doubts: "How did you know I needed help at that time?"
Wang Bo laughed and said, "It's the movement of you scratching the back of your ear that reveals your inner anxiety!"
When colleagues are in urgent need of help, do you send your help in time?If you want to provide timely help, you must first detect the inner needs of the other party by reading the other party's body language.
[expert answering doubts]
When we were young, when our parents scolded us, we would unconsciously cover our ears with both hands.Because we don't want to hear our parents scolding us.When we grow up, we don't want to listen to others, we also put our hands in our ears and scratch them!
In fact, many people have the habit of scratching their ears, but scratching different parts represents different meanings.For example, rubbing the back of the ear means not to listen to evil, scratching the earlobe and the back of the ear continuously means that the person is anxious, folding the whole ear to cover the ear hole means being impatient, and picking the ear with fingertips means disdain.
Wang Bo in the story saw the clues through Li Lu's constant scratching of her ears, and guessed that she was anxious and needed help from others.Therefore, he took the initiative to ask Li Lu if he needed help.Sure enough, Li Lu encountered difficulties and was asking for help.Therefore, Wang Bo's help enabled Li Lu to overcome the anxiety dilemma, and their relationship took a step forward.
In the workplace, if you see a colleague scratching the lobe and back of the ear, you might as well go over and ask him if he needs your help.Maybe you can win the great affirmation of your colleagues for such a small favor, so as to establish a good interpersonal relationship.
[Extended reading]
Many people have the habit of scratching their ears, but scratching different parts means different things.Now, let's decipher these codes together!
Rubbing the back of the pinna: Do not listen to insults
When you talk to a person, the other person subconsciously rubs the back of the pinna with his fingers, which shows the listener's mentality of "don't listen to evil".He wanted to prevent these words from completely entering his ears by rubbing his ears.If you catch the other person making this move, it's best to stop the conversation.
Constantly scratching the earlobe and the back of the ear indicates inner anxiety
Generally speaking, when people feel anxious, they will always scratch and move around on the seat, etc. These continuous small movements reflect the restless heart of the other party.If you can see the clues at this time, take the initiative to ask the other party, take the initiative to help the other party, so that the other party can successfully overcome the anxiety dilemma, then the distance between you and the other party will be greatly shortened.
Folding the entire pinna forward to cover the piercing shows impatient
Covering the ear hole with the pinna is a direct way to prevent words that you don't want to hear from entering the ear, and it is the most direct action to convey the message of impatience among all scratching ears.If when you are talking with someone, the other party folds the entire ear to cover the ear hole, then you should immediately stop the current conversation, because the other party's action is telling you: "I don't want to hear you anymore, I've heard enough."
Show disdain by picking ears with fingertips
Suppose you are talking about something enthusiastically, and the other party puts his fingertips in the ear canal and picks his ear.This gesture shows that the other person is disrespectful to you, or dismissive of the topic.In this case, you can politely remind the other party, and ask the other party with a smile: "Are you listening? What do you think?" If you are a leader or an elder, you should consider changing the subject or giving the other party a chance to speak.Because it is said that the other party's mind is not on your topic, but on himself.Therefore, communication will not achieve any effect.
8.Coworker tapping fingers on desktop to show resistance
Mr. Q: At the meeting today, I spoke on stage as the secretary of the general manager on behalf of the general manager.When I was speaking impassionedly, I unexpectedly discovered that a colleague kept tapping the table with his hands, looking absent-minded.Is he resistant to me, is this a protest?
Professionals in the workplace: When you are speaking, the other party keeps tapping the table with his fingers to show that he has resistance to your point of view, which is a manifestation of protest.If he knocks faster, it means that he is more impatient and bored.
【Scene reconstruction】
Wen Jing is the secretary to the general manager of an advertising company.As her name suggests, she is gentle and quiet, responsible for her work, and is deeply liked by the general manager.Therefore, if the general manager is on a business trip, or cannot come back for a meeting because of something, Wen Jing will act as his representative.
This time, the general manager was away on a business trip and couldn't make it back, so he entrusted Wen Jing to speak on his behalf.At the meeting, Wen Jing impassionedly conveyed the views of the general manager.However, at this moment, Wen Jing unexpectedly discovered that a supervisor of the company was tapping his finger on the desktop, and the tapping force was still very strong.Wen Jing looked at him, but the supervisor didn't look at Wen Jing, and tilted his head to the other side, still tapping on the table.
Wen Jing, who has a little understanding of psychology, saw the supervisor's actions, and it was clear that he had developed resistance to his own views, and it was a protest. The faster he tapped, the more impatient and bored he was.She looked around at the members present.Obviously, the director's action affected the progress of the meeting, and every member showed a dull look on his face.Everyone was very dissatisfied with the behavior of the supervisor.However, after all, it was a meeting, and no one could come out to stop the supervisor from acting like this.
Wen Jing decided to let the meeting go on as normal. She knew very well that the supervisor was rather snobbish and didn't pay much attention to the company's development, but she was very concerned about when and how much her salary would rise.Therefore, Wen Jing changed the topic, ended the topic of company development, and turned to the next step of the company's employee treatment plan.
As expected by Wen Jing, when the supervisor heard about the staff remuneration plan, he immediately regained his energy, stopped tapping on the table, and listened intently to Wen Jing's speech.At this moment, he suddenly realized something.
When Wen Jing saw his movement, an imperceptible smile appeared on the corner of her mouth.In this way, the meeting ended successfully.After the meeting, the supervisor smiled at Wen Jing in embarrassment.
At a meeting, when you spoke impassionedly, some colleagues not only did not listen carefully to your speech, but also kept tapping on the desktop, affecting other colleagues. How do you deal with this matter?
[expert answering doubts]
Tapping the table with your fingers is a courtesy in Chinese tea culture.Usually, when someone pours you tea, you tap your fingers on the table to show respect for the other person.
However, in today's social occasions, the meaning of tapping the table with your fingers is not etiquette, but a physical movement that can interpret the other party's inner emotions.For example, when the general manager of the company speaks loudly about the company's rules and regulations at a regular meeting, some employees stare at a certain place and keep tapping their fingers on the desktop.Obviously, these employees have become bored with the general manager's topic and do not support the general manager's point of view.
Wen Jing in the story encountered such a situation. When she spoke impassionedly at the meeting, the company executives kept tapping on the desktop.Wen Jing was well aware that the supervisor was resistant to her point of view, so she used this action to express her protest.However, his action affected the progress of the meeting, and even affected the mood of the participants.If you want to prevent the other party from continuing this action and eliminate his resistance, the best way is to talk about topics that he is interested in.Therefore, Wen Jing changed the subject to prevent the supervisor from continuing this action.Wen Jing's move not only allowed the meeting to proceed normally, but also established a friendly relationship with the supervisor.
At a meeting, when you spoke impassionedly, some colleagues not only did not listen carefully to your speech, but also kept tapping on the desktop, affecting other colleagues.At this time, all you need to do is to change the subject and talk about the topics he is interested in.
[Extended reading]
In social situations, tapping the table with your fingers is a physical gesture to interpret the inner emotions of the other party.This action has different meanings in different situations, let's take a look together:
Tapping the table with your fingers is an auxiliary action for thinking
We often see such a scene in movies: the calm male protagonist sits in a dimly lit study room thinking about problems, frowning, focusing his eyes, and tapping his fingers on the table.Obviously, tapping the desktop with a finger is an auxiliary action that accompanies a person when thinking about a problem.It should be noted that when the leader taps on the table with his fingers, and the tap is very strong, it means that he is thinking about the problem at this time is very heavy, and he uses this action to reduce the pressure.
Tapping your fingers on the tabletop is a sign of leisure
Sometimes, when an old man hums a ditty, closes his eyes slightly, and taps the table with his fingers, we can feel that the old man is leisurely and complacent, immersed in the satisfaction of his current life state.Of course, the meaning represented by this action is not only applicable to the elderly, anyone's leisurely state may be conveyed through this action.
Tapping the table with your fingers indicates resistance
If you are talking with someone, the other person's fingers start to move on the table.Obviously, he is resistant to your point of view or topic, and he is a little irritable and distracted.Because he has allocated some attention to his finger movements.The faster the finger taps on the table, the more impatient and bored the other party is.If you change the subject, maybe the other person stops tapping their fingers on the table immediately and listens to you wholeheartedly.
chapter summary:
1.Colleagues showing nonchalant expressions
Showing a nonchalant expression is not really not caring, but an expression of strong inner dissatisfaction.When you see a colleague showing a nonchalant expression, you must find out the reason for his inner dissatisfaction and find a way to eliminate his dissatisfaction.
2.Colleagues with wandering eyes
The erratic gaze shows that he is restless at this time, afraid that you will see something, and there may be something hidden from you!Faced with this situation, you have to find out what he is hiding from you.
3.Colleagues with swollen noses
A swollen nose indicates fear.If you see a colleague with a swollen nose, don't do anything to make him feel more scared.Otherwise, it will aggravate his inner fear.
4.colleagues with drooping eyes
When you talk to a co-worker, his eyes always droop, which means he looks down on you.If you want to get along well with such colleagues, you need to prove your strength with your achievements and impress them.
5.Colleagues with crystal teardrops in their eyes
Glittering tears in the eyes don't necessarily mean sadness, sometimes it means happiness.When getting along with colleagues, don't misunderstand the meaning expressed by the other party's tears!
6.Colleagues drawing circle while talking on phone
Drawing circles while talking on the phone shows a person's subconscious loneliness.Such people seldom pay attention to other people's feelings, so they are naturally indifferent to other people's affairs.Therefore, never entrust important things to such people to complete.
7.Colleagues who keep scratching their earlobes and behind their ears
Scratching the earlobe and the back of the ear continuously shows that he is anxious inside, and he is likely to encounter some difficulties.You might as well go over and ask him if he needs your help.
8.Colleagues tapping their fingers on the desktop
Colleagues keep tapping the table with their hands to show that they have resistance in their hearts. If you are talking and the other party makes this action, then you might as well change the subject.
(End of this chapter)
As long as you are at work, you will have colleagues.However, colleagues come from all over the world. Among them, there are people who have the same temperament as you, and some who have different personalities from you, and there are even people who you particularly hate.In the face of colleagues with different personality types, how to get along with them and how to make them your best partner?Only by trying to figure out his temperament and emotions through his actions, can he find the correct way to get along with him and create a good working atmosphere.
1.A nonchalant expression indicates a strong inner dissatisfaction
Q Jun: Today, when I talked about something with my colleague, I thought he would be sad, but he showed a nonchalant expression, does he really not care?
Professionals in the workplace: You have to pay attention to this. Showing a nonchalant expression is not really not caring, on the contrary, it shows a strong inner dissatisfaction.
【Scene reconstruction】
Li Ying is a very smart girl, she is amiable and well behaved, no matter what problems she encounters, she can deal with them skillfully.Therefore, it is deeply loved by colleagues.
Once, she and her colleague Xiao Zhang went to meet a very important client.The colleague Xiao Zhang accidentally said the wrong thing and offended the client, which caused a lot of losses to the company.Li Ying was very angry and severely criticized her colleague Xiao Zhang.
She's always been amiable, and this is the first time she's ever accused someone so harshly.Because she was too emotional at the time, she said a lot of nasty things.In addition, she was in a fit of anger, so she only focused on venting her anger, but for a moment she forgot to pay attention to her colleague Xiao Zhang's expression.After she calmed down slowly, she realized that what she said was a bit serious.So I hurried to find Xiao Zhang.She thought that Xiao Zhang was also complaining about herself at this time, and she was very angry.Unexpectedly, when she saw Xiao Zhang, she found that Xiao Zhang had no expression on his face.
Seeing Xiao Zhang's indifferent expression, Li Ying felt even more uneasy.She knew that the seemingly indifferent expression on Xiao Zhang's face was actually an expression of strong dissatisfaction in his heart.If she couldn't get rid of her dissatisfaction in time, she might explode soon, and by then, the relationship between colleagues would become embarrassing.
After understanding Xiao Zhang's expression, Li Ying quickly changed her attitude, changed the harsh and ugly language just now, and immediately said in a gentle tone: "I'm sorry, I was too reckless just now, and I said a lot of ugly things, I hope Don't mind. In fact, I know you didn't mean it. If you have any dissatisfaction in your heart, just say it! Say it, and you will feel better. "
Hearing what she said, Xiao Zhang began to state his reasons eloquently, and the expression on his face gradually eased a lot as he "vented".After Xiao Zhang's expression returned to normal, Li Ying estimated that Xiao Zhang's anger had almost been released.So I made a timely summary of this work error.A possible crisis among colleagues was resolved in this way.
Is the expression of indifference really indifference?In the workplace, have you understood the real meaning behind the expression of indifference?
[expert answering doubts]
There is a saying: "The expression on the face is the clouds in the sky." This sentence is quite reasonable, because the expression is indeed a barometer of the heart most of the time, reflecting a person's true inner thoughts.As long as we observe carefully, we can see a person's happiness and happiness from his smile, his anger and dissatisfaction from his scowling face, and his sadness from his sad face. and sad...
However, we can make judgments about the obvious emotions displayed by a person, but we cannot understand the expressions on the face where there is no symbol.Just like Xiao Zhang in the story, showing a nonchalant expression.If Li Ying did not understand the hidden meaning behind Xiao Zhang's indifferent expression, then she would not be able to eliminate Xiao Zhang's dissatisfaction in time.After Xiao Zhang's emotions broke out, the friendly relationship among colleagues was about to break down.
In fact, anyone who understands psychology knows that a nonchalant expression is actually an expression of strong inner dissatisfaction.Therefore, we should not only pay attention to those expressionless expressions, but also learn to interpret the real emotions behind them, so as not to let ourselves be deceived by such potential expressions.
[Extended reading]
The expression of indifference on his face does not mean that he really doesn't care, but a manifestation of strong dissatisfaction in his heart.If a certain person is found to be expressionless about something or someone, then we should pay special attention to his movements.This expression may hide two meanings:
expressed strong dissatisfaction
If a person's anger reaches a certain limit, his face will not show a scowl, but a blank expression.This is a critical point, if it is allowed to continue, the next moment will be the moment when he explodes.
extreme disregard
At some point, deadpan is also a sign of disregard.If a person is extremely ignorant of someone or something, his face will be expressionless.Because he doesn't pay attention to the people or things in front of him at all, completely treating them as if they don't exist.So it doesn't show any expression for things that don't exist.
2.Wandering eyes indicate restlessness
Q Jun: Recently, when I was talking to a colleague, I found that his eyes are always wandering, why is that?
Professional in the workplace: The erratic gaze shows that he is restless at the moment, and he may be hiding something from you, so be careful!
【Scene reconstruction】
Xiaoyun joined the company on the same day as Xiaoli and became a member of the sales department.There is not much difference in age between them, and they get along very well, and they encourage and help each other at work.Over time, the two of them became good friends who talked about everything, and they were really like sisters.
However, one day after get off work, the two of them agreed to eat KFC together, and this time it was Xiaoyun's treat.After buying the hamburger, they sat down face to face, chatting while eating the hamburger.They talked about the work situation of the day, the gossip news of the company, the handsome and sunny new colleagues, and how rude the boss was.When talking about her boss, Xiaoli didn't say a word, she ate a hamburger, but her eyes looked east and west, looking absent-minded.
Xiaoyun soon realized that Xiaoli's mood was not right, so he deliberately broke her head and made her face him.However, what Xiaoyun didn't expect was that Xiaoli glanced at herself, and then immediately shifted her attention, as if she didn't dare to face herself.
Xiaoyun didn't say anything else, she remembered a book that said, if a person's eyes are always wandering when talking to her, and she dare not look at herself, then she must have an unknown secret in her heart, and she is afraid of what others will see. The clues come.Thinking of this, Xiaoyun looked at Xiaoli again, and found that she met his gaze, and then involuntarily moved his gaze down.Although Xiaoyun didn't believe what was said in the book, she felt that Xiaoli must have something to hide from herself.But what is it?
After some thought, Xiaoyun asked frankly: "What's wrong with you today, why do you always look evasively, is there something you are hiding from me?"
When Xiaoli heard this, a very painful expression appeared on her face.After a while, she took a deep breath and said, "That day, the manager asked us about our visit to a client. I accidentally told you about the discount you gave to a client. After I finished speaking, I realized the seriousness of the matter. Sex. I'm afraid the manager will call you out. So, I'm afraid to confront you."
Xiaoyun suddenly remembered that when Xiaoli and Xiaoli went to talk about a client, the client insisted on a discount, but he couldn't hold back, so he agreed to the client's request.Unexpectedly, the manager found out about this incident.However, what Xiaoli didn't expect was that instead of being angry, Xiaoyun patted herself on the shoulder and said, "It's okay, just be careful next time. We are still good sisters who talk about everything."
When my best colleagues look at me, their eyes are always erratic, and they dare not look at me squarely. Why is this?
[expert answering doubts]
Sight is the refracted light of a person's psychology, and it can reflect the desire and emotion deep in a person's heart.How to discover his mental state at this time from the sight of others?In fact, it is very simple. When talking with others, you only need to pay a little attention to find where the other party's line of sight falls, and from where the other party's line of sight rests, you can find out what kind of state he is in at the moment.
If he looks into the distance and shows a dull expression, it means that he is in a low mood and has no intention of listening to you at all. The reason why he still sits in front of you and listens to you is just because he doesn't want to distract you. It's just for fun.If when you look at him squarely, but he deliberately avoids your sight, then you have to pay attention, because most people who dare not look at you squarely have ghosts in their hearts.Anyone who understands psychology knows that when a person has something in his mind, as long as he looks at you squarely, he will feel inexplicably nervous.If you are looking at him squarely, but his eyes are wandering, looking at you, and then immediately shifting his attention, you also need to pay attention.Because the wandering gaze is a manifestation of inconsistency, which shows that he is restless at this time, and he may have said something insincere, and he is afraid that you will see something.If you explore carefully, you may discover unexpected secrets!
In the story, Xiaoli feels sorry for her friend Xiaoyun because she said something wrong, so when she looks at Xiaoyun, her eyes are always erratic, and she dare not look at her directly.After careful observation, Xiaoyun saw the clues, and speculated that Xiaoli must have something to hide from him.Sure enough, as she expected, after some conversations, she figured out the reason why Xiao Li dared not face herself.Therefore, the misunderstanding was eliminated in time and the friendship was saved.
The above story tells us a truth: When talking with colleagues, we should not only carefully ponder the meaning behind other people's words, but also pay more attention to the other person's line of sight, and try to find breakthroughs from the other side's line of sight.
[Extended reading]
Upward gaze indicates self-confidence
When a person speaks, his eyes are always slightly upward, which shows that he is full of confidence in his status and ability.Most of this line of sight belongs to leaders or workers who control others, and it is most prominent among politicians.
Downward gaze indicates cowardice
When you are talking with the other party and find that the other party quietly lowers his eyes, you should figure out that he is in a state of timidity and is very nervous.This is because he has realized that you are his formidable opponent, or there is a big gap between you in age and social status.
direct eye contact is a sign of hostility
When you are talking to someone, looking directly at you indicates that he is suffering from some kind of powerful blow, or harboring a strong hostility.
Eyes pointing far away indicates absent-mindedness
When you are talking to the other person, the other person always looks away, which shows that he is absent-minded at the moment.It's likely that she doesn't like you, or isn't interested in what you have to say.Generally speaking, when you talk to someone, if the other person doesn't look you in the eye, or looks indifferently, it means that he is not interested in you or has no sense of intimacy.
An erratic gaze indicates restlessness
When you talk to the other party, the other party's eyes are always erratic and evasive, which shows that he is restless at the moment and is afraid that you will see something.
The opposite sex suddenly avoids your sight to show that he cares about you
Sometimes, the gaze of someone of the opposite sex causes you to feel a searing sensation.However, when your eyes meet, the other party moves away deliberately, which shows that the other party cares about you very much, and even has a tendency to have a crush on you.
3.Swollen nose indicates fear
Mr. Q: Today, when I saw my female colleague Xie Ying come out of the manager's office, her nose became abnormally swollen.I don't know why she acted like this?
Career expert: A swollen nose indicates fear in her heart, and the manager must have said or done something that frightened her.It's better for you to stay away from her, otherwise she will vent her anger on you.
【Scene reconstruction】
One day, when Sun Ping got off work, he saw his female colleague Xie Ying coming out of the manager's office with a dejected expression on her face.He took a closer look and found that her brows were tightly furrowed, her nostrils were swollen, and her nostrils were fluttering, she was in extreme fear.
Out of kindness, Sun Ping wanted to say hello to her and ask her what was wrong, but he didn't seem to see him.So, Sun Ping stretched out his hand and patted him on the shoulder from behind. Unexpectedly, Xie Ying, a female colleague, turned around and suddenly became furious: "What do you want to do? Stay away from me!" When Xie Ying said this, her nostrils It became very swollen and stared at him wide-eyed.
Sun Ping froze in place for a while, and didn't come back to his senses for a long time.He never thought that Xie Ying, who was always gentle and lovely, would be so furious.After a while, he managed to squeeze out a few words: "I see you are in a bad mood, I just want to say hello to you. I have no other meaning."
Xie Ying took a deep breath and burst into tears.Sun Ping asked at a loss: "What's wrong with you, what happened?"
After a while, Xie Ying said, "I'm going to resign!"
Sun Ping seemed to understand at once. He used to hear from his colleagues that the manager behaved badly and harassed female colleagues from time to time.He didn't believe it before, but now he does.At the same time, he regretted his reckless behavior just now.In fact, from her swollen nostrils, it should be seen that Xie Ying is in fear at this time, and reaching out to pat her on the shoulder only intensified her inner fear.No wonder she would be furious with herself.If you called her loudly, maybe she wouldn't make such an unknown fire.
Have you ever encountered this kind of situation in getting along with your colleagues, you stretched out your hand to pat the other person's shoulder, and greeted her with good intentions, but caused the other party to get angry for no reason?
[expert answering doubts]
The nose is in the center of our face. Although there are very few expressions, because it is located in the center of the entire face, it also plays a role of "connecting the past and the next".From a medical point of view, the nose is one of the channels for breathing.Whether a person's inner emotions are stable or not will cause changes in breathing, and changes in breathing will affect the shape and color of the nose.
Generally speaking, in mutual communication, a person's mental activities are often revealed from the changes in the nose.For example, a wrinkled nose usually expresses disgust for a thing; when it is contemptuous, it "sneers"; when it is angry, the nostrils are swollen and the wings of the nose flap... It can be seen that the nose also has its own rich "language". See through the other person's psychology through subtle changes in the other person's nose.
Although Sun Ping in the story noticed the subtle changes in the nose of his female colleague Xie Ying, and knew from her swollen nostrils that she was in fear, he was too careless to figure out why Xie Ying was so frightened, let alone think about it. My own actions will aggravate the inner fear of female colleague Xie Ying.If he had thought of this earlier, he wouldn't have provoked an unknown fire.
Therefore, in communicating with colleagues, we must learn to gain insight into their mental activities by observing their noses.
[Extended reading]
Although the expression of the nose is rare, a person's psychological activities are often shown from the changes of the nose.Therefore, in communicating with colleagues, you might as well gain insight into their mental activities by observing their noses.
Nose discoloration indicates flinching
The color of the nose does not change often, but if the nose is completely white, it shows that the other party must be cowering.If it is a counterparty, or a non-interested counterparty, it doesn't matter, it is mostly caused by his hesitation and hesitation.For example: the state when one does not know whether conditions should be raised during a transaction, or when one is hesitant to make a condition.
Swollen nose indicates fear
Usually, a person's nose is swollen to express anger or fear, because in a state of tension, breathing and heartbeat will speed up, so the phenomenon of nostril enlargement will occur.However, the nostrils also swell with excitement.Thus, the expression "very short of breath" signifies a state of elation or excitement.
As for the enlargement of the other party's nose, is it because of elation and pride, or because of suppressing dissatisfaction and anger?This will be judged from the other reactions of the interviewee.
Sweaty nose is a sign of restlessness
Sometimes this is just the other party's personal problem, but for people who don't have such problems on weekdays, once beads of sweat emerge from their noses, it should be said that the other party's heart is anxious or nervous.If the other party is an important counterparty, he must be eager to reach an agreement, and he must complete the emotional expression of the transaction anyway, because he is afraid that if the transaction fails, he will lose the opportunity or incur great disadvantages, so he will feel anxious and nervous. , and fell into a state of self-imposed restraint.Because of tension, the nose is sweaty.
4.Drooping eyes indicate contempt for the other
Q Jun: I am a new employee who has just joined the company. When I talk to a colleague, I find that his eyes are always drooping.Why is he behaving like this?
Career expert: When talking to the other party, his eyes always droop, which means he looks down on you.As a new employee, you have to work hard to make a performance to impress him.
【Scene reconstruction】
Wu Xiaoli is a new employee in the sales department. She is outgoing, lively and lovely.As soon as you arrive at the company, when you see your colleagues, you greet them with a smile, and most of your colleagues smile back.
However, a colleague who was seated closest to her didn't respond to her smile.Since the seats are very close to each other, Wu Xiaoli took the initiative to chat with this colleague during the lunch break.
"Hi! My name is Wu Xiaoli, and I'm a new colleague." Wu Xiaoli introduced herself to her with a smile.
"Hello!" The colleague said indifferently.
Wu Xiaoli was very puzzled. When the colleague said "Hello", he didn't look at her directly, but his eyes drooped, as if he was looking at something below.
"How long have you been in the company?" Wu Xiaoli still asked softly.
"Five years!" When the colleague said this, his tone was full of arrogance.
"Oh!" Seeing his lukewarm attitude towards her, Wu Xiaoli stopped in time.
Sitting next to the computer, Wu Xiaoli was very depressed.I wanted to learn some experience from my old colleagues, but I didn't expect to get caught in the dust.At this time, she suddenly remembered the doubts that had arisen in her heart just now.So, I checked it on Baidu.Check it out and the answer will come out.It turned out that her drooping eyes were contemptuous and looked down on the other party.At that time, Wu Xiaoli secretly made up her mind: I must work hard to make achievements, and when I make achievements, will you still look down on me?
Huangtian paid off. With Wu Xiaoli's hard work, after two months, she signed three contracts.This made the colleagues look at her with admiration, and the colleague who had looked down on her before also gave her a thumbs up with a smile.
Just walked into a new company, everything here is new to you.Do you also feel perplexed when you try to talk to a co-worker but his eyes keep drooping?
[expert answering doubts]
Confucius said: "Look at his eyes, how thin a person is!" The meaning of this sentence is: If you want to observe a person, you must observe his eyes.Because a person's eyes directly express his inner thoughts, desires and emotions.
Emerson once said this sentence: "The eyes of a person speak as much as the tongue. They don't need a dictionary, but they can understand the whole world from the language of the eyes." Our skylight is spreading all kinds of information of the inner world to the outside world all the time.
When Wu Xiaoli in the story was talking to her colleagues, she found that her eyes always drooped.She didn't know the hidden meaning of the drooping eyes.In order to understand the doubts in Kaixin, she searched Baidu and finally found the answer.Knowing that this colleague despises her, although she is angry, she knows how to live up to it.Through unremitting efforts, she finally impressed that colleague.Eliminating the contempt of the other party, getting along with her is naturally not a problem.If Wu Xiaoli hadn't figured out the meaning of drooping eyes at that time, then that colleague might have been looking at her with this look.
From the above story, if you want to know a person's inner thoughts, then observe his eyes and get the answer from his eyes.
[Extended reading]
Eyes are the windows of a person's soul, and a person's thoughts are usually revealed through the eyes.If you want to observe a person, you must start by observing his eyes.
eyes up
The eyes are raised, and the upper lashes are pushed up so strongly that they almost coincide with the drooping eyebrows, creating a haunting expression that conveys something of horror.
eyes blink
The series of blinking actions include continuous blinking, super blinking, eyelash vibration and so on.Blinking occurs when you are about to cry, and represents an extremely suppressed mood.
eyes hanging up
This kind of person hides ulterior secrets in their hearts, and likes to consciously exaggerate the facts. They have a negative personality and dare not face each other squarely.
drooping eyes
This action has the meaning of contempt for the other party, or simply does not care about the other party's situation.The sender of this kind of action is generally calm in personality, only thinks of himself in essence, and is a willful person.
5.The teardrops overflowing from the eyes are also a sign of happiness
Mr. Q: Today is Valentine's Day. During the lunch break, the eyes of female colleague Bai Shan suddenly overflowed with crystal clear tears.I thought she broke up with her boyfriend, so I went to comfort her.Unexpectedly, she laughed out loud.
Professional in the workplace: People not only shed tears when they are in pain and sadness, but also when they are happy and moved.Bai Shan's tears were probably moved by her boyfriend, not because she was sad!
【Scene reconstruction】
The annual Valentine's Day is coming, and romance and excitement permeate the office.When we met each other in the morning, we all smiled and wished each other Happy Valentine's Day.
Liu Mushroom is a very beautiful and lovely girl, and her colleagues like her very much.This day was originally a happy, happy day.However, after get off work in the afternoon, other colleagues left one after another, but she lay on her desk and cried.
Shang Zhiqiang is the main person in charge of the company's administration. When he saw Liugu crying, he was a little confused, so he thought that she was broken in love, and her boyfriend chose to break up on this special day.So he came to her and asked, "Why are you crying?"
Liu Mushroom looked up and found that it was Shang Zhiqiang.She hastily wiped away her tears, smiled and said in a crying tone: "I'm fine! It's fine."
Shang Zhiqiang touched the back of his head and asked in confusion: "It's nothing, why are you still crying? Why didn't you go on a date today? Did you break up with your boyfriend?"
Shang Zhiqiang’s series of questions made Liu Gu dumbfounded. Knowing that he had misunderstood himself, Liu Gu smiled and said, “On this special day today, it’s too late for me to be happy? Why are you crying?”
"I clearly saw tears in your eyes." Shang Zhiqiang asked reluctantly.
Liu Mushroom touched the corners of his eyes, and found that there were still traces of tears in the corners of his eyes.She said with some embarrassment: "I am happy tears, not sad tears!"
Shang Zhiqiang turned around and said to himself: "I only know that a person will shed tears when he is sad, but I don't know that he will also shed tears when he is happy?"
Liu Mushroom covered his mouth and smiled secretly.It turned out that her boyfriend said on QQ that he was going to give him a surprise tonight.He not only prepared roses and chocolates for her, but also prepared a beautiful ring.No wonder she shed tears of joy.
In the workplace, have you ever misunderstood a colleague in this way? He was crying because he was so happy, but you thought he was crying because of something sad?
[expert answering doubts]
Most of us know that when a person is sad, they cry.However, what many people don't understand is that when a person is happy and excited, he will also make tears flow.Just like Shang Zhiqiang in the story, he didn't understand why Liugu was crying.
Why do you cry when you are happy?This is because the autonomic nervous system in the human body is a set of nervous systems that are in charge of internal organs, gland secretion, and heart beating.In this system, there are two types of nerves with different functions - sympathetic and parasympathetic.These two different nerves cooperate with each other to manage many physiological activities in the human body.Tears are the secretions of the lacrimal glands in the eye sockets, which are part of the joint management of the sympathetic and parasympathetic nerves.When people are happy and excited, the sympathetic nerves are excited, which will make people shed tears, but the amount is very small.
If Shang Zhiqiang in the story knew the reason why people cry when they are happy and excited, maybe he would not misunderstand his colleague Liu Mushroom.To get along well with colleagues, in addition to caring about each other, you also need to understand each other's body language. Don't be like Shang Zhiqiang in the story, misinterpreting each other's happiness as sadness and making a joke.However, this is not just a joke, but also tells us how important it is to understand the secrets hidden behind other people's micro-reactions.
[Extended reading]
People cry when they are sad, they cry when they are happy and excited, and they cry when they are afraid... Let's take a look at how to understand the meaning of tears:
Crying to get rid of emotions when sad
Generally speaking, crying is a manifestation of sadness.Because there is a certain limit to a person's ability to bear, once this limit is exceeded, the mind will not be able to bear it.Crying is often an external expression of extreme pain in the human heart, and it is the "killer weapon" for self-protection. When a person falls into a state of terrible worry and despair, he neither wants to eat nor sleep.At this time, finding a way to make him cry can relieve his pain.
According to some scholars, when a person is crying, the pituitary gland will release endorphins, which will excrete a lot of tears, and tears contain harmful chemicals that can cause pain.People expel their tears by crying, which is to dispel bad emotions.Therefore, people will feel much more relaxed.
cry when happy
Tears are the secretions of the lacrimal glands in the eye sockets, which are part of the joint management of the sympathetic and parasympathetic nerves.When people are happy and excited, the sympathetic nerves are excited, which will make people shed tears, but the amount is very small.
6.People drawing circle while talking on the phone feel lonely
Q Jun: I have a colleague who always draws circles while making a phone call. Isn’t she worried that her doing so will affect her work?
Career expert: The person who draws a circle while making a phone call is lonely in her heart. She usually does not affect her work, but she doesn't care about other people's affairs, and her attitude is very indifferent.If you ask her for help with anything, you're in the wrong person.
【Scene reconstruction】
Du Juan is an operator of a company, and she has to deal with different people by phone every day.Due to the need to frequently record the names, phone numbers and addresses of customers, she always has a lot of paper and several pens on her desk for emergencies.
When she first started working, Du Juan did a great job and made a lot of contributions to the company.But, slowly, as time relentlessly devoured her work, she grew weary of the job.Due to being unable to communicate with others all year round, her inner loneliness is increasing day by day.In addition, during this period of time, the company often required to work overtime, and even the time for dating her boyfriend was compressed, which exacerbated her inner loneliness.Therefore, suffering from loneliness, she did not know when she fell in love with doodles on paper while answering the phone, and especially liked to draw circles on paper without stopping.
One day after get off work, a client called, and she started drawing on paper unconsciously again.At this time, her colleague Xiao Dynasty came over to her.It turned out that during lunch, Xiao Wang asked her to help him contact a very important client.Du Juan agreed immediately.
Xiao Wang stood next to Du Juan. After standing for about 2 minutes, Du Juan found out.She pointed to the phone in her hand apologetically, meaning to ask him to wait a while.
About 5 minutes later, Du Juan finished answering the phone.Xiao Wang was about to ask something, but Du Juan put down her pen and asked, "What's the matter, Xiao Wang?"
Xiao Wang was taken aback, but quickly said calmly: "Sister Juanzi, you are so noble and forgetful! What you promised me at noon..."
Du Juan blinked her eyes, and asked blankly, "What's the matter?"
"Just please help me contact a client!"
"Oh. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I will definitely ask for you tomorrow." Du Juan said embarrassingly, forgetting about this matter.
In the workplace, have you ever met such a colleague who promised to help you but forgot?
[expert answering doubts]
Experts from the Institute of Psychology in Bonn, Germany, have come to a conclusion by observing the redundant actions people make when they make a phone call: more than 60% of people like to scribble on small pieces of paper when they make a phone call.In response to this phenomenon, some psychologists tested these "painters" and found that their "paintings" basically faithfully reflected the personality habits of the "painters".This kind of graffiti essentially reflects some subconscious characteristics of a person.When a person is on the phone while unconsciously scribbling on paper, the information in his subconscious mind will involuntarily vent.
In the story, Du Juan draws circles while making a phone call, showing her subconscious loneliness.Because of her inner loneliness, she thinks about herself most of the time, so she seldom pays attention to other people's feelings. Naturally, she is indifferent to other people's affairs, and always feels that those things are simply a kind of interference to herself.Therefore, she will focus all her energy on herself.When her colleague Xiao Wang asked about it, she still looked blank, making Xiao Wang dumbfounded.
As the saying goes: "I will blame others and blame myself." When Xiao Wang blamed Du Juan for not taking his own affairs to heart, he should blame himself for finding the wrong person.If he had noticed Du Juan's habit and correctly interpreted the secret behind the habit, then he would not have entrusted Du Juan with such an important matter.
From the above story, we draw a conclusion: When getting along with colleagues, if you need to ask your colleagues to do something very important, then don't find someone who likes to make circles while making calls.Only by finding the right person can things be done.If you want to find the right person, you must first learn to recognize people, and to recognize others requires you to understand the secrets behind the other person's micro-reactions.
[Extended reading]
People drawing circle while talking on the phone feel lonely
A person who likes to draw circles on the phone is lonely in his heart.This type of person only pays attention to their own feelings, and doesn't care about other people's affairs at all, and even has a somewhat indifferent attitude, always feeling that those things are a kind of interference to themselves.Because at this time, he had already concentrated all his energy on himself.
People who draw flowers or the sun while talking on the phone are fragile
If a person likes to draw the sun or flowers while talking on the phone, it shows that his heart is extremely fragile.This type of person gives people a feeling of happiness on the surface, but in reality it is the opposite, and they are very eager for the care and comfort of others.Therefore, I couldn't help expressing this enthusiasm on paper.
The person who draws a grid while talking on the phone is in an embarrassing period
If a person likes to draw grids all over the paper while talking on the phone, it means that he is now in an unseemly or embarrassing situation, and feels more or less unconfident.
Man crossing himself while talking on the phone is distressed
If a person likes to make the cross while talking on the phone, it means that he has a sense of fault and is feeling distressed or remorseful at this time.
People who draw small people while talking on the phone feel helpless
If a person likes to draw a very simple villain while talking on the phone, it shows that he is helpless at the moment, or is deliberately avoiding some kind of responsibility.When he needs to firmly deny but can't speak, he will draw this kind of villain.
7.Constantly scratching the earlobe and the back of the ear indicates inner anxiety
Q Jun: When I went to work today, I found a colleague who kept scratching the earlobe and the back of the ear.I don't know what happened to him?
Professionals in the workplace: Scratching the earlobe and the back of the ear continuously shows that the person is anxious. You should go over and ask the other person actively, and take the initiative to help him, so that the other person can get through the anxiety dilemma smoothly.In this way, the distance between you and the other party will be greatly reduced.
【Scene reconstruction】
Wang Bo is a very careful person, not only for his work, but also for others.In the office, he can always observe the movement changes of people around him and interpret the meaning, and then take the initiative to help others, which has won the unanimous approval of his colleagues.
One day, after work, Wang Bo inadvertently looked up at his surroundings.Soon, he found that his new colleague Li Lu was staring at the computer with his back behind his back, scratching the back of his ear with one hand.
The movement of Li Lu scratching the back of her ear caught Wang Bo's attention. Judging from his experience, Li Lu was feeling anxious about something at the moment.So, he quietly came to Li Lu and asked, "Do you need help now?"
When Li Lu heard it, she was surprised and said, "Well, I'm not familiar with computers enough. I don't know why Word can't be opened. I haven't gotten it right since I went to work."
Wang Bo saw that it was a very common problem, so he helped Li Lu solve the problem without saying anything.Li Lu quickly said thank you.
Wang Bo smiled and said, "You're welcome." Li Lu wanted to say something more, but Wang Bo turned and left.After get off work, Li Lu approached Wang Bo and asked her doubts: "How did you know I needed help at that time?"
Wang Bo laughed and said, "It's the movement of you scratching the back of your ear that reveals your inner anxiety!"
When colleagues are in urgent need of help, do you send your help in time?If you want to provide timely help, you must first detect the inner needs of the other party by reading the other party's body language.
[expert answering doubts]
When we were young, when our parents scolded us, we would unconsciously cover our ears with both hands.Because we don't want to hear our parents scolding us.When we grow up, we don't want to listen to others, we also put our hands in our ears and scratch them!
In fact, many people have the habit of scratching their ears, but scratching different parts represents different meanings.For example, rubbing the back of the ear means not to listen to evil, scratching the earlobe and the back of the ear continuously means that the person is anxious, folding the whole ear to cover the ear hole means being impatient, and picking the ear with fingertips means disdain.
Wang Bo in the story saw the clues through Li Lu's constant scratching of her ears, and guessed that she was anxious and needed help from others.Therefore, he took the initiative to ask Li Lu if he needed help.Sure enough, Li Lu encountered difficulties and was asking for help.Therefore, Wang Bo's help enabled Li Lu to overcome the anxiety dilemma, and their relationship took a step forward.
In the workplace, if you see a colleague scratching the lobe and back of the ear, you might as well go over and ask him if he needs your help.Maybe you can win the great affirmation of your colleagues for such a small favor, so as to establish a good interpersonal relationship.
[Extended reading]
Many people have the habit of scratching their ears, but scratching different parts means different things.Now, let's decipher these codes together!
Rubbing the back of the pinna: Do not listen to insults
When you talk to a person, the other person subconsciously rubs the back of the pinna with his fingers, which shows the listener's mentality of "don't listen to evil".He wanted to prevent these words from completely entering his ears by rubbing his ears.If you catch the other person making this move, it's best to stop the conversation.
Constantly scratching the earlobe and the back of the ear indicates inner anxiety
Generally speaking, when people feel anxious, they will always scratch and move around on the seat, etc. These continuous small movements reflect the restless heart of the other party.If you can see the clues at this time, take the initiative to ask the other party, take the initiative to help the other party, so that the other party can successfully overcome the anxiety dilemma, then the distance between you and the other party will be greatly shortened.
Folding the entire pinna forward to cover the piercing shows impatient
Covering the ear hole with the pinna is a direct way to prevent words that you don't want to hear from entering the ear, and it is the most direct action to convey the message of impatience among all scratching ears.If when you are talking with someone, the other party folds the entire ear to cover the ear hole, then you should immediately stop the current conversation, because the other party's action is telling you: "I don't want to hear you anymore, I've heard enough."
Show disdain by picking ears with fingertips
Suppose you are talking about something enthusiastically, and the other party puts his fingertips in the ear canal and picks his ear.This gesture shows that the other person is disrespectful to you, or dismissive of the topic.In this case, you can politely remind the other party, and ask the other party with a smile: "Are you listening? What do you think?" If you are a leader or an elder, you should consider changing the subject or giving the other party a chance to speak.Because it is said that the other party's mind is not on your topic, but on himself.Therefore, communication will not achieve any effect.
8.Coworker tapping fingers on desktop to show resistance
Mr. Q: At the meeting today, I spoke on stage as the secretary of the general manager on behalf of the general manager.When I was speaking impassionedly, I unexpectedly discovered that a colleague kept tapping the table with his hands, looking absent-minded.Is he resistant to me, is this a protest?
Professionals in the workplace: When you are speaking, the other party keeps tapping the table with his fingers to show that he has resistance to your point of view, which is a manifestation of protest.If he knocks faster, it means that he is more impatient and bored.
【Scene reconstruction】
Wen Jing is the secretary to the general manager of an advertising company.As her name suggests, she is gentle and quiet, responsible for her work, and is deeply liked by the general manager.Therefore, if the general manager is on a business trip, or cannot come back for a meeting because of something, Wen Jing will act as his representative.
This time, the general manager was away on a business trip and couldn't make it back, so he entrusted Wen Jing to speak on his behalf.At the meeting, Wen Jing impassionedly conveyed the views of the general manager.However, at this moment, Wen Jing unexpectedly discovered that a supervisor of the company was tapping his finger on the desktop, and the tapping force was still very strong.Wen Jing looked at him, but the supervisor didn't look at Wen Jing, and tilted his head to the other side, still tapping on the table.
Wen Jing, who has a little understanding of psychology, saw the supervisor's actions, and it was clear that he had developed resistance to his own views, and it was a protest. The faster he tapped, the more impatient and bored he was.She looked around at the members present.Obviously, the director's action affected the progress of the meeting, and every member showed a dull look on his face.Everyone was very dissatisfied with the behavior of the supervisor.However, after all, it was a meeting, and no one could come out to stop the supervisor from acting like this.
Wen Jing decided to let the meeting go on as normal. She knew very well that the supervisor was rather snobbish and didn't pay much attention to the company's development, but she was very concerned about when and how much her salary would rise.Therefore, Wen Jing changed the topic, ended the topic of company development, and turned to the next step of the company's employee treatment plan.
As expected by Wen Jing, when the supervisor heard about the staff remuneration plan, he immediately regained his energy, stopped tapping on the table, and listened intently to Wen Jing's speech.At this moment, he suddenly realized something.
When Wen Jing saw his movement, an imperceptible smile appeared on the corner of her mouth.In this way, the meeting ended successfully.After the meeting, the supervisor smiled at Wen Jing in embarrassment.
At a meeting, when you spoke impassionedly, some colleagues not only did not listen carefully to your speech, but also kept tapping on the desktop, affecting other colleagues. How do you deal with this matter?
[expert answering doubts]
Tapping the table with your fingers is a courtesy in Chinese tea culture.Usually, when someone pours you tea, you tap your fingers on the table to show respect for the other person.
However, in today's social occasions, the meaning of tapping the table with your fingers is not etiquette, but a physical movement that can interpret the other party's inner emotions.For example, when the general manager of the company speaks loudly about the company's rules and regulations at a regular meeting, some employees stare at a certain place and keep tapping their fingers on the desktop.Obviously, these employees have become bored with the general manager's topic and do not support the general manager's point of view.
Wen Jing in the story encountered such a situation. When she spoke impassionedly at the meeting, the company executives kept tapping on the desktop.Wen Jing was well aware that the supervisor was resistant to her point of view, so she used this action to express her protest.However, his action affected the progress of the meeting, and even affected the mood of the participants.If you want to prevent the other party from continuing this action and eliminate his resistance, the best way is to talk about topics that he is interested in.Therefore, Wen Jing changed the subject to prevent the supervisor from continuing this action.Wen Jing's move not only allowed the meeting to proceed normally, but also established a friendly relationship with the supervisor.
At a meeting, when you spoke impassionedly, some colleagues not only did not listen carefully to your speech, but also kept tapping on the desktop, affecting other colleagues.At this time, all you need to do is to change the subject and talk about the topics he is interested in.
[Extended reading]
In social situations, tapping the table with your fingers is a physical gesture to interpret the inner emotions of the other party.This action has different meanings in different situations, let's take a look together:
Tapping the table with your fingers is an auxiliary action for thinking
We often see such a scene in movies: the calm male protagonist sits in a dimly lit study room thinking about problems, frowning, focusing his eyes, and tapping his fingers on the table.Obviously, tapping the desktop with a finger is an auxiliary action that accompanies a person when thinking about a problem.It should be noted that when the leader taps on the table with his fingers, and the tap is very strong, it means that he is thinking about the problem at this time is very heavy, and he uses this action to reduce the pressure.
Tapping your fingers on the tabletop is a sign of leisure
Sometimes, when an old man hums a ditty, closes his eyes slightly, and taps the table with his fingers, we can feel that the old man is leisurely and complacent, immersed in the satisfaction of his current life state.Of course, the meaning represented by this action is not only applicable to the elderly, anyone's leisurely state may be conveyed through this action.
Tapping the table with your fingers indicates resistance
If you are talking with someone, the other person's fingers start to move on the table.Obviously, he is resistant to your point of view or topic, and he is a little irritable and distracted.Because he has allocated some attention to his finger movements.The faster the finger taps on the table, the more impatient and bored the other party is.If you change the subject, maybe the other person stops tapping their fingers on the table immediately and listens to you wholeheartedly.
chapter summary:
1.Colleagues showing nonchalant expressions
Showing a nonchalant expression is not really not caring, but an expression of strong inner dissatisfaction.When you see a colleague showing a nonchalant expression, you must find out the reason for his inner dissatisfaction and find a way to eliminate his dissatisfaction.
2.Colleagues with wandering eyes
The erratic gaze shows that he is restless at this time, afraid that you will see something, and there may be something hidden from you!Faced with this situation, you have to find out what he is hiding from you.
3.Colleagues with swollen noses
A swollen nose indicates fear.If you see a colleague with a swollen nose, don't do anything to make him feel more scared.Otherwise, it will aggravate his inner fear.
4.colleagues with drooping eyes
When you talk to a co-worker, his eyes always droop, which means he looks down on you.If you want to get along well with such colleagues, you need to prove your strength with your achievements and impress them.
5.Colleagues with crystal teardrops in their eyes
Glittering tears in the eyes don't necessarily mean sadness, sometimes it means happiness.When getting along with colleagues, don't misunderstand the meaning expressed by the other party's tears!
6.Colleagues drawing circle while talking on phone
Drawing circles while talking on the phone shows a person's subconscious loneliness.Such people seldom pay attention to other people's feelings, so they are naturally indifferent to other people's affairs.Therefore, never entrust important things to such people to complete.
7.Colleagues who keep scratching their earlobes and behind their ears
Scratching the earlobe and the back of the ear continuously shows that he is anxious inside, and he is likely to encounter some difficulties.You might as well go over and ask him if he needs your help.
8.Colleagues tapping their fingers on the desktop
Colleagues keep tapping the table with their hands to show that they have resistance in their hearts. If you are talking and the other party makes this action, then you might as well change the subject.
(End of this chapter)
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