Deyun: No.1 in Xiaozike, no refund

Chapter 337
After Gao Fengxingyun Liushui finished reciting Guankou, he introduced: "Cross talk actor Guankou has to practice every day, and it takes four hours to practice. How well you do after practice depends on the piece of paper in front of you."

"Can you see it on paper?" Qu Xiaoyun asked in surprise.

Gao Feng nodded and explained: "After practicing, there is no saliva on the paper, which means that the kung fu is pure."

"Oh." Qu Xiaoyun nodded.

Gao Feng shook his hands and frowned and said, "After the practice, I saw that the paper was gone and was sprayed to pieces by the spittle stars, and it fell straight down, which means that the kung fu is not good! Why do we practice this?"

"Is it useful?" Qu Xiaoyun asked.

Gao Feng explained with an example: "Because the theater performance is relatively close to the audience, especially the friends in the first row, people are happy to buy tickets for the first row, so sit here, good guy, each actor on the stage brings a small watering can, spit The stars are blowing out, so you can bear it!"

"Yes." Qu Xiaoyun snickered.

Gao Feng continued: "I was sprayed once, and next time the audience will have a long memory. Take an umbrella. When I meet a neighbor, I will ask why I went. I will go to the Deyun Club to listen to cross talk. Why do you bring an umbrella when you listen to cross talk on a sunny day?" ? You don’t know that there is rain in some areas!”

The audience in the audience burst out laughing.

"Okay, we are partial." Qu Xiaoyun shook his hands, speechless.

Gao Feng said with emotion: "It sounds ironic, but what I'm saying is that the actors didn't work hard. The comedians of Deyun Club recite tongue twisters all the time. The most relaxed one is the host."

Qu Xiaoyun nodded: "Announcer."

Gao Feng introduced to the audience: "Our announcer's name is Hou Zhen, and his grandfather's name is Hou Baolin. Hou Baolin and Chang Baorui are all old artists of Bao's generation."

"Correct."

"His grandfather belongs to Laozi's family."

"Huh?" Qu Xiaoyun didn't hear right, and hastily blocked the way.

"Hahaha~~"

Gao Feng hastily changed his words: "The old man of Bao's generation, the eldest son and grandson of Mr. Hou Baolin, his own grandson, this grandson is very interesting."

There were bursts of laughter from the audience.

Qu Xiaoyun curled his lips and asked, "What is this grandson? It's Mr. Hou Baolin's grandson."

Gao Feng spread his hands and said disapprovingly, "That's right, I didn't say it was my grandson!"

"Hahaha~~"

The audience laughed and gave warm applause.

After the laughter.

Gao Feng continued to introduce: "Hou Zhen used to talk about cross talk, but he thought it was too troublesome to practice, so he changed the host!"

"Announcement saves trouble." Qu Xiaoyun nodded.

Gao Feng waved his hand and said, "The host also has to practice. If you don't practice your skills, you will be wrong. Hou Zhen made a mistake when you hosted the party."

"Has he ever dealt with this?" Qu Xiaoyun was surprised.

Gao Feng nodded and imitated: "Invited him to the National Day Gala. Hou Zhen was dressed up that day, holding a microphone to announce the scene. Leaders and audiences, welcome the National Day. The large-scale cultural evening is over."

"Hahaha~~"

The audience in the audience filled their brains with embarrassing scenes, and they laughed so hard that they gave warm applause.

"Is this acting?" Qu Xiaoyun pouted.

Gao Feng smiled and waved his hands: "It didn't act, and it ended for others before it started."

"Okay." Qu Xiaoyun snickered.

Gao Feng went on to say: "Fortunately, it was a mistake during the rehearsal in the afternoon, and he changed the ending of the official performance—leaders and audience, welcome the National Day, a large-scale cultural dinner, and start now!"

"Hahaha~~"

The audience was amused again.

"Good guy, I didn't eat before the curtain call, I was thinking about eating!" Qu Xiaoyun couldn't help complaining.

Gao Feng said angrily: "If the dinner is changed, why don't people talk about him!"

Qu Xiaoyun nodded: "It should be said."

Gao Feng stretched out his finger, imitating the appearance of pointing his nose and scolding, and said: "I tell you, Hou Zhen, don't look at your grandfather as Hou Baolin, you are your grandfather, do you know that you are your grandfather, can you succeed if you work hard? Hurry up and report!"

"Hou Zhen was also afraid, so he took the microphone and went on again. Friends, do you know the Yellow River? The Yellow River is our mother river. We must treat our Yellow River well and don't pollute our Yellow River. We love the Yellow River. Please Enjoy the song of the Yangtze River!"

"Hahahaha~~"

With a few burdens down, the recording hall was full of joy, and there was no need to fake the audience's laughter in the live performance. Everyone laughed as if they were going to bite someone.

"It's a waste of effort." Qu Xiaoyun was speechless.

Gao Feng sighed softly: "This is Hou Zhen. After he came down, he was criticized again—what's the matter with you, Huang He, you said Yangtze River, isn't this a joke for others! Did you mean you, let me tell you , the next program must not be reported to people as wrong!"

"What's the next show?" Qu Xiaoyun asked curiously.

Gao Feng explained: "A repertoire, flute solo, and folk music "Raising the Whip to Urge the Horse to Transport the Grain King". Don't report it wrong."

"Yes, this is a mouthpiece."

"Hou Zhen muttered and came up."

"I'm a little scared."

Gao Feng lowered his head and imitated stutteringly: "Pengpeng... friends, come on... next, please enjoy the calf flute performance..."

"Hahaha~~"

"Ah? Is this plausible?" Qu Xiaoyun pouted.

Gao Feng explained: "Duzi is a curse word in some places!"

"Correct."

Gao Feng shook his hands, and said anxiously, "What's the calf flute playing? Good guy, the team leader started yelling at the waiting gate, and reported it again. What's the matter with the calf? It's all messed up. Didn't hear it?" Repost! Hou Zhen—I'm sorry everyone, please correct me, please enjoy the flute solo.”

"It's right this time." Qu Xiaoyun heaved a sigh of relief.

Gao Feng imitated: "Raise the whip to urge the horse to transport the hooligans!"

"Hahaha~~"

"Good guy, it's wrong again." Qu Xiaoyun was speechless.

Gao Feng sighed and said, "Do you think our announcer wants to get it?"

"Can I have some snacks?" Qu Xiaoyun shook his head helplessly.

Gao Feng went on to say: "It's not just the announcements that make jokes, sometimes actors interact with the audience blindly, which also delays things."

"Is there still such a situation?" Qu Xiaoyun asked in surprise.

Gao Feng nodded: "Yes! In a theater that sings Northeast folk songs, I don't know which one of you likes to listen to Northeast folk songs. There is a section called Throwing the Ring, which is very pleasant to sing, and the actors also work hard to sing it. .”

"You have a few words." Qu Xiaoyun said.

Gao Feng cleared his throat and sang:
"Sister, in the garden, embroidery, silk, velvet, geer~~"

"A bee came and stung the palm of my hand. I threw away the gold ring. Huh Geer~~"

"it is good!!!"

Although it is not a professional singing, but the imitation is very charming, and the audience gave warm applause.

Gao Feng waved his hands and pointed down the stage, saying: "This actor has a bad habit of shaking his hands, and the word is also vague."

"Which one?" Qu Xiaoyun asked curiously.

Gao Feng explained: "The latter sentence, hey Geer!"

"Oh."

Gao Feng imitated: "He sang consecutively, just one eye - throwing a gold ring with his hands, one eye."

The audience in the audience looked forward to hearing this, and felt that the burden should be good.

"Singing like this and adding a hand-waving movement, I just pointed to the auditorium, and there happened to be an old man sitting in the third row of the audience, and the old man had one eye!"

"Hahaha~~"

"Every time this sentence refers to the old man, he doesn't mean it, he just moves out of habit."

"Doesn't this cause trouble for people!" Qu Xiaoyun shook his hands.

Gao Feng imitated the situation and said: "Sister, in the garden, embroidery, silk, velvet, geer - why is there an eye here? Throwing away the gold ring, eh geer - —Why are you here again? No, I have to find them.”

"Just a detour like this, we came to our backstage, and the staff stopped the old man, otherwise he would go on stage."

"No."

Gao Feng restored the situation and said: "Staff—Yo Yo Yo, uncle, what do you mean? Old man—what do you mean? What song are you singing on stage? Why is there still an eye here? Why is there me here? Woolen cloth?"

"My lord, you have misunderstood. Our lyrics are 'Hey Geer Yaer' and he sang 'One Eye' all the time. He pointed to the actor's habitual movements. We have performed more than 300 performances. He All pointing there, today you happened to be sitting there, I'm really sorry, if you don't believe me, if you look at the stage now, he still has to point to where you are sitting."

"Let's have a look." Qu Xiaoyun praised.

Gao Feng went on to say: "Wait, catch up with that actor singing the last line 'It just so happens that you can't pray to the heavens and the earth, hey Geer, yo', the actor changed his body and pointed at the uncle."

"Hahaha~~"

The audience in the audience imagined the embarrassing scene and were amused. They all laughed and applauded.

After the laughter.

Gao Feng spread his hands and said, "This is a coincidence. It's neither the actors nor the audience. It's just a misunderstanding."

"Yes." Qu Xiaoyun nodded.

Gao Feng went on to say: "Someone said, isn't there nothing wrong with the opera stage?"

"Singer." Qu Xiaoyun praised.

Gao Feng sighed softly: "There are more mistakes in the opera. In the Peking Opera "Was the Woodcutter Troubling the Mansion", the protagonist is called Fan Zhongyu, and his wife was snatched away. The villain is called Ge Dengyun. He has to find his wife. Scan to listen, say hello with your home address, and sing four lines of libretto on the way."

"What libretto?" Qu Xiaoyun asked curiously.

"Brother Qiao told me at that time that the old thief was named Ge Dengyun. He ran forward with big strides and came to the thief's house before he knew it."

Gao Feng shook his hands after singing: "The singer forgot the name of Ge Dengyun in the lyrics in the middle of singing."

"Good guy, I can forget about this too." Qu Xiaoyun curled his lips.

Gao Feng raised the corner of his mouth and said, "This guy has an idea. He was thinking about the libretto on the stage following the beat of the drums. While thinking about it, he walked to the door of the stage. If there is someone at the door of the stage, tell him."

"Correct."

"But it turned to the door and turned back."

"Why?" Qu Xiaoyun asked curiously.

Gao Feng shook his hands: "There is no one at the gate, there used to be more than 40 people inside."

"It's too small." Qu Xiaoyun snickered.

"Today, I came to see my joke, so I ran to the gate."

"What if there's no one here?"

Gao Feng waved his hand: "No, there is a band here. I'll ask the drummer, and the drummer will be able to tell me."

"Oh."

"Wandering around and whispering about playing drums, I can't say that I forgot to speak jargon. I forgot to call me pad, and the drummer forgot too."

"It's too late." Qu Xiaoyun curled his lips.

Gao Feng pointed to the side and said: "The string player next to him saw it, and thought to himself what is it called? The singing player forgot and the drumming player also forgot. Let me remind him."

"Oh, those who pull the strings know." Qu Xiaoyun said.

Gao Feng explained: "Reminder not to yell 'Gorden Cloud', the audience heard the yelling, the one who pulled the string had an idea, he stretched out one leg, this kick! There is a word 'Deng' in the word 'Gorden Cloud', don't you think about it?" Get up!"

"Smart, mention a word." Qu Xiaoyun praised with a thumbs up.

Gao Feng kicked his legs and imitated: "The one who pulled the string coughed at the actor and then kicked his legs. Did the actor see it? He saw it!"

"Isn't that good!"

Gao Feng sighed lightly: "Unfortunately, I misunderstood it."

"How did you understand it?" Qu Xiaoyun asked curiously.

Gao Feng imitated: "That's how he sang——Brother Qiao told me that the name of the old thief is 'One Leg'!"

"Hahaha~~"

The burden rang, and the audience laughed and applauded.

"Hey, isn't this a fool!" Qu Xiaoyun was speechless.

Gao Feng nodded: "That's right, it can be called a leg! As a result, the actor became depressed backstage, and after our persuasion, he was persuaded."

"Just work harder next time." Qu Xiaoyun was speechless.

Gao Feng went on to say: "Look at this opera commentary, it's a joke. I have a cousin who sings opera commentary, and it's the new play "Little Son-in-Law". There should be a few lines in it."

"A few words." Qu Xiaoyun praised.

Gao Feng cleared his throat and sang earnestly: "Don't be angry, Daddy Zunsheng, please listen to my daughter complaining about my grievances. My father and mother only care about the bride price and found a little son-in-law for my daughter. I am nineteen, he is eleven, and he doesn't care about everything." I understand, I hope my father and mother will return to the Luo family for the dowry gift, and I will not marry someone surnamed Luo until I die."

"it is good!!!"

The singing was correct and full of charm, and the audience applauded and applauded.

"This is not very good."

Gao Feng sighed, and explained: "My cousin just sang half a sentence, just in time for a middle-aged woman in the middle of the second row of auditoriums to take care of the children. Children should not be brought when they are four or five years old. They don't understand and cry If you keep making trouble, she has messed up my sister with her child care."

"You should learn from that time." Qu Xiaoyun said.

Gao Feng restored the situation and said: "My cousin just sang half a line, honor your father. The women in the second row - don't talk!"

"It's time to rush this matter, let's take care of the children." Qu Xiaoyun said, sucking his teeth.

Gao Feng shook his hands, and said helplessly: "My cousin sang the wrong song once she made trouble, and sang don't get angry as don't talk!"

The audience in the audience burst out laughing.

"It's a mess."

Gao Feng frowned, wondering: "Don't talk about it, the words have changed, and the words will have to be re-edited. My cousin is now making up the words."

"How did you make it up?" Qu Xiaoyun asked curiously.

Gao Feng imitated: "Father Zunsheng, don't talk, listen to your daughter's words carefully, father and mother only want to make money, and find a second fool for my daughter, I am nineteen, he is eight plus three, he is crazy about everything, May parents return all the betrothal gifts from others, and find someone else to match them."

"Hahaha~~"

The change was very interesting, and the audience laughed and applauded.

"Hey, this word is too watery." Qu Xiaoyun curled his lips.

……

(End of this chapter)